Swallowbrook's Winter Bride (5 page)

Next door Nathan’s thoughts were also about the party but along different lines. He and Libby would be sleeping beneath the same roof for once, he was thinking, not the golden thatch above them as he would have liked on the night when Libby had fallen off the ladder, but the roof of a smart new hotel by the lake.

On the Saturday night he went on ahead to the party venue with Toby so as to be there beside his father as he greeted his guests, and to make sure that all was in order with the arrangements he’d made with the hotel.

Hugo was the first to arrive with his sister, who he’d brought along for company, a childminder having been engaged to look after her little girls. Then came the surgery nurses Robina, Tracey and Coleen with their partners, followed by the receptionists also suitably escorted, and tagging along behind them was Gordon, a confirmed bachelor.

Next to arrive was Alison, the cleaner, and her husband, who looked after the gardens around the surgery and did general maintenance on the building when necessary. Even the man from the pathology lab who came each day to collect blood samples for testing and anything else that had to go to his department was there. He’d been coming for so many years he was looked on as one of them. The last, but not the least by any means, was Libby, stunning in black, smiling her pleasure to be there and taking in the vision of Nathan and his father resplendent in dinner jackets, evening shirts and bow-ties. Even Toby was wearing a short-sleeved shirt with a little tie held in place by elastic.

As each guest had arrived John had shaken hands with them cordially until Libby had appeared and then it was different.

He held her close for a long moment and then said gruffly, ‘I’m missing you, Libby. How’s it going with Nathan back in harness?’

The man in question was only inches away, observing her with an ironic gleam in his eyes as if daring her to be truthful and admit that she was putting up with him on sufferance.

He was in for a surprise. ‘Everything at the practice is fine,’ she told his father. ‘The patients are delighted to see Nathan back, and the rest of us really appreciate his contribution to the village’s health care.’

‘That’s good,’ the older man said, and with a glance at Toby, who was looking around him with interest, ‘You won’t have much time for anything else with the job and this young fellow to look after, eh, Nathan?’

‘It would depend on what it was and how important,’ he said evenly, with his glance still on her, and now there was no irony in it, just a question that she didn’t know the answer to.

By the time the last course of the meal was being served Toby was ready for sleep, nodding his curly blond head every few seconds, and as she observed him Libby said to Nathan in a low voice, ‘You can’t very well leave your guests, Nathan. Shall I take Toby and get him settled for the night, if he’ll let me?’

‘I don’t think he’ll object,’ he replied. ‘He likes you, Libby, and would be round at your place every minute of the day if I let him.’

‘So why don’t you?’

‘I’m not sure. Maybe it’s because I know that I’m not welcome and I wouldn’t want that sort of feeling to wash off onto him.’

As she bristled with indignation beside him he said, ‘We’d better take him up now before he falls off his chair.’

‘Yes,’ she agreed, ‘but don’t think that by hustling me off with Toby, what you have just said about not being welcome is going to pass without comment.’

He was on his feet and didn’t reply. Lifting Toby up into his arms, he whispered in his ear, ‘Libby is going to give you your bedtime cuddles tonight—is that all right?’

‘Mmm,’ he murmured.

When they reached the top of the hotel’s wide staircase and turned into the first corridor he pointed to two rooms overlooking the lake and, giving her the keys, said, ‘The nearest one is yours, and the one next to it is a twin-bedded for Toby and I. When you’ve opened the door I’ll lay him on his bed and then go back to the others, if that’s all right with you.’

‘Yes,’ she whispered. ‘I won’t come down until I’m sure that he’s fast asleep.’

The moment Nathan had gone Toby opened his eyes and smiled up at her drowsily. ‘We need to take your shirt and tie off and put your pyjamas on before you go to sleep,’ she told him gently. ‘They are here beside you where Uncle Nathan has left them, so if you’ll just sit up for a moment we’ll put them on.’

He did as she’d asked and gazing around him said, ‘I haven’t got my comforter, Libby,’ and with his bottom lip trembling went on, ‘I always hold it close when I’m in my bed.’

‘What is it, Toby?’ she asked as tears began to flow.

‘It is Mummy’s nightdress, Libby,’ he sobbed. ‘It’s soft and cuddly and smells lovely.’

She was looking around her desperately, lifting the lid of a small overnight case only to find it empty, checking that the nightdress wasn’t tangled up in the bedclothes, opening drawers, all to no avail.

‘I think that it must have been forgotten when your uncle was packing your things,’ she said consolingly, ‘but do you know what, Toby? I have a nightdress that smells nice. You can cuddle up to that if you like, pretend that it’s your comforter just for tonight. What do you say?’

‘Where is it?’ he wanted to know.

‘In my room next door.’ Not wanting to leave him even for a second after watching his distress, she said, ‘Shall we go and get it?’

He nodded, and swinging his small legs over the side of the bed took her hand in his and side by side they went to find the nightdress that was folded neatly on her pillow.

She gave it to him and holding it close to his cheek he said, ‘Mummy won’t mind, will she?’

‘No, of course not,’ she told him reassuringly. ‘She will be happy that you are happy. So if that is all right, shall we go and tuck you up in bed?’

The room that Nathan had booked for her had a double bed in it and as Toby observed it he said, ‘Can I sleep in your bed, Libby?’

The thought of having him safe and close beside her was tempting, and what the outcome would be if she left him asleep in the next room and when she’d gone to join the others he awoke in the distressed state he’d been in earlier didn’t bear thinking of, so she said, ‘Yes, you can, but first I must write a note for someone who loves you very much to tell him where you are when the party is over.’

‘You mean Uncle Nathan, don’t you? He is going to be my new daddy, did you know that?’

‘Yes, he told me how excited he is to be your new dad,’ she told him.

Picking up a pen off a nearby writing desk, she wrote on headed notepaper…

Nathan.

Toby is sleeping with me after a major upset that has now been sorted. It’s why I didn’t come back to join the party. I know you will want to see for yourself that he is all right, so will leave my door unlocked until you’ve been and checked on him.

Libby.

When she’d placed it on Toby’s empty pillow in the next room she took him to her bed and held him close until he was asleep, then, bereft of her nightwear, slipped off the dress and lay beside him in the black lacy slip that she’d worn beneath it.

Down below Nathan was watching the staircase as coffee was being served to his guests, expecting Libby to appear any moment, but she didn’t materialise and knowing how tired Toby had been he was wondering why.

He was tempted to go and check on them but didn’t want to be seen as fussing, either by her or by the surgery staff who were in no hurry to go. But at last they had all said their farewells and he’d seen his father safely into a taxi, so was free to go to the suites above to see where Libby had got to.

The first thing that registered was that there was no Toby in the bed that he had laid him on. The second was the note on the pillow. As he read it his expression tightened. For God’s sake! What kind of upset was Libby referring to? Then he was out in the corridor and pushing back the door that she’d left unlocked.

When he looked inside his face softened. His adopted son was asleep in the crook of the arm of the woman he could once have had if he hadn’t been too blind to see what had been under his nose.

As he looked down at the smooth skin of her shoulders inside the flimsy slip and the rise and fall of her breasts as she slept beside the precious child who had been catapulted into his life, it was his turn to fight back the tears for the waste of the years and the mistakes that both of them had made.

He hadn’t a clue what could have upset Toby to such an extent until he looked at what he was holding in his arms and as he observed it he gave a hollow groan. He’d forgotten to pack Toby’s comforter. How could he have done such a thing? Thank God, Libby had come up with a solution.

His exclamation of dismay must have disturbed her. She had opened her eyes and was looking up at him.

‘Everything is all right,’ she whispered, and easing her arm from beneath the sleeping child she slid her legs over the side of the bed and stood before him.

‘I can’t believe that I forgot his comforter, of all things,’ he said wretchedly, ‘and lumbered you with the aftermath of my carelessness.’

‘Stop berating yourself,’ she told him. ‘You are marvellous to do what you do for Toby. He has told me that you are going to be his new daddy and seems fine with the idea. Forgetting to bring his mummy’s nightdress isn’t going to change that.’

He was not to be consoled. ‘You must wish me a thousand miles away, Libby,’ he said bleakly. ‘I went out of your life a long time ago and have had the nerve to come bursting back into your planned existence as if by divine right.’

She took a step forward and touched his face with gentle hands and suddenly nothing else mattered except themselves, not Toby sleeping contentedly beside them, the party that she’d seen little of or the practice that was their daytime rendezvous. There was peace between them for a few brief moments with no recriminations or hurts to spoil it, no bitterness or past mistakes hovering over them. It was a moment of supreme need with desire ruling their emotions.

For the third time in Libby’s life Nathan was touching her and there was nothing casual about it this time. His mouth on hers was demanding, urgent, and she was responding with every fibre of her being.

He took her hand and drew her towards the door of a small sitting room at the end of the bedroom and once inside turned the catch to prevent Toby walking in on them. Then he was slipping the black slip off her shoulders and kissing the cleft between her breasts.

As their passion increased Nathan lowered her onto a sofa and as she gazed up at him in the moment before the climax of their desire Libby came to her senses.

She’d already made one big mistake where Nathan was concerned, she thought. This could be another. This wild abandonment of common sense could lead to more heartbreak if she let it continue.

He felt her change of mood as painfully as if it was a knife thrust and as she got slowly to her feet he placed the keys of the suite next door in her hand and said sombrely, ‘You can’t let go of the past, can you, Libby?

‘If you don’t mind swapping I’ll take over here and we’ll see you at breakfast. Do you need to take anything with you?’

‘Just the things I brought with me for an overnight stay,’ she said weakly, and flinging her belongings into her travel bag she wrapped herself in the robe that she’d brought with her and went.

So much for that, he thought grimly when she’d gone. He’d lost the control that he’d been cultivating ever since coming back to Swallowbrook and all because Libby had stroked his face. Yet it hadn’t been just that, had it?

His emotions had already run amok when he’d discovered he’d left Toby’s comforter behind and Libby had been left to handle the distress that the oversight had caused his little one, and when instead of blame she’d shown him only tenderness the barriers between them had come down.

He’d given in to passion she’d aroused in him and blown it, had been able to tell that the change in her response to his love-making had been because she’d suddenly remembered how he had once let her see that he wasn’t interested in any feelings she might have for him, and had told her cruelly to go and forget him.

It had seemed as if she’d taken him at his word when she’d married Jefferson, and he’d stayed away even after he’d died and Libby was free of him, because of what he’d said that day. Was the awful mistake he’d made always going to be there to haunt him?

As Toby stirred in his sleep and held Libby’s nightdress more closely to him, Nathan eased himself carefully onto the bed beside him in the place where she had lain and wondered what tomorrow would bring in a relationship that seemed to be going nowhere.

He’d come back to Swallowbrook with no intentions towards Libby other than telling her, if she would give him the chance, how much he regretted the way he’d behaved that day at the airport when her timing had been so unfortunate.

CHAPTER FIVE

W
HEN
Libby went down to breakfast
the following morning, pale and drawn after a sleepless night, Nathan and Toby were already seated at a table by a window overlooking the lake on the point of finishing theirs.

When Toby called across to her she had no choice but to go to where Nathan was observing her unsmilingly from the opposite side of the table.

She didn’t want to sit with them, the happenings of the night before were too recent, too raw, but she could tell that Toby was expecting her to and there was no way she wanted to upset him. So she asked Nathan, ‘Is it all right if I join you?’

‘Yes, of course,’ he said evenly, and she thought that the core of their relationship,
if it could be described as that
,
was as past its
promise as the fallen leaves of bronze and gold lying beneath the trees that surrounded the lake.

The mellow autumn of Nathan’s return to Swallowbrook was past, winter would soon be upon them and where she’d always looked forward to crisp mornings and snow on the fells, this time it was going to be an ordeal to be got through.

A waitress was at her elbow, asking if she was ready to order, and bringing herself back from the gloom of her thoughts Libby consulted the menu.

When she had gone Nathan asked, as if nothing between them had changed, ‘Are you staying here for the rest of the day or checking out, like Toby and I?’

‘I intend leaving immediately after breakfast,’ she told him. ‘There are things I have to do when I get back—household chores, paperwork from the surgery to look through, and other matters to attend to.’ She made an attempt at a smile. ‘I take it that everyone enjoyed the party?’

‘Yes, it appeared so,
except for the two of us.
Maybe you will let me make it up to you at some time in the future? I owe you that.’

‘You don’t owe me anything,’ she said in a low voice that was not for Toby’s ears. ‘I suggest we forget last night.’

‘Just like that?’ he said evenly. ‘It would seem that you have a very low pain threshold.’

‘All hurts lessen in time,’ she replied, and as the waitress returned with the food that she’d ordered the stressful conversation dwindled into silence.

Nathan got to his feet and said, ‘Come along, Toby, say goodbye to Libby.’ He looked at her. ‘We’ll return your emergency “comforter” when it has been washed and ironed. Thanks again for the loan of it.’

She put down her knife and fork and observing him gravely commented, ‘I was only too happy to be of use
with regard to that
,’
and to Toby who was looking around him, unaware of the undercurrents between them, she said, ‘I’ll see you soon, Toby. Do I get a kiss?’

‘Mmm,’ he said, and pursing his lips placed them against her cheek.

As the two of them went out into the car park Nathan thought wryly that it was nice to know that one of them was in favour.

If ever the day dawned when Libby was ready to wipe the slate clean he would feel that at last the wheel had turned its full circle for them. At the present time it was just something that only happened in his dreams.

When she went to Reception to settle her account for the suite that she had occupied briefly she was told that it had been paid by Dr Nathan Gallagher.

He was heaping coals of fire on her head, she thought miserably, with the memory of his cool comment that he would return her nightdress when it had been washed, and now she was discovering that Nathan had paid for the luxurious accommodation that she’d had little time to take note of the night before.

The receptionist had noticed that she’d been taken aback, and volunteered the information that the account had been settled the week previously when Dr Gallagher had paid in full for everything that the hotel had arranged to provide, and as she went out to have a last stroll beside the lake she thought wretchedly that she’d been wrong about the ‘coals of fire’ and should be ashamed. He had treated her as he would any friend or acquaintance. The fact that the night before had escalated into something totally mind-blowing had been down to her as much as him.

As she walked beside the still waters the house on the island that could only be reached by boat came into view. She’d heard recently that it had become a tourist attraction and was available to rent for those who craved solitude in one of the most beautiful settings for miles around.

The next time she had the chance to take a break from the practice she would stay there if it was available, she decided. Where no one or nothing could take away the confidence in herself that had disappeared completely the night before when Nathan had begun to make love to her and the longing that she’d thought was under control had become a bright flame of desire.

During the week after the party Libby and Nathan spoke only briefly about surgery matters and in the evenings stayed well apart, until the night when Toby turned up on her doorstep with the nightdress neatly wrapped and with a note attached to say, ‘Thanks again for the loan, Libby. I’m sending it with Toby as I have a strong feeling that my presence would not be welcome. Sorry I can’t make myself scarce during surgery hours, Nathan.’

When she’d read it she looked across, knowing that he would be somewhere near, that he would not let Toby out into the wintry dusk even for a second without being nearby. Sure enough, he was standing in the doorway of the cottage next door where he could see him.

‘Can I come in, Libby?’ the young messenger asked once he’d delivered the package.

‘Yes, if it is all right with your uncle,’ she said immediately, and called across to ask if he could stay and play for a while.

Nathan nodded. ‘Yes, for half an hour and then it will be his bedtime.’

Exactly thirty minutes later she took him back and when he opened the door to them Toby said, ‘We’ve had lots of fun playing hide and seek.’

‘Really,’ was Nathan’s only comment as his young charge skipped past him. Giving in to the urge to get him talking on a more friendly level, she asked, ‘What have you got planned for Toby at Christmas?’

‘Nothing at the moment,’ was the answer. ‘Why, have you got any ideas?’

‘Er, no, but I could give it some thought. It will be his first Christmas in Swallowbrook and yours after a long gap, so it should be something special.’

‘Not necessarily for me,’ he said dryly, ‘but for Toby, yes, absolutely. We’ll probably go to stay with Dad for the two days. What are you planning to do?’

She knew he didn’t care a jot about what she would be doing, that he was merely asking out of politeness. Any frail rapport they’d had was gone, blown away as if the cold winds from the fells were already in their winter mode.

‘I haven’t made any plans as yet,’ she told him, ‘though I will be somewhere around. This place is too lovely to be away from at Christmastime, or have you forgotten?’

‘I forget nothing,’ he said levelly. ‘Neither the good or the bad,’ and she wondered what that was supposed to mean. Maybe it was a hint that the conversation had gone on long enough with her standing on the doorstep like someone trying to sell him something, unwelcome and unwanted.

‘I’ve got things to do so will say goodnight,’ she said abruptly, and he didn’t protest.

The October half-term at the village school was approaching and Libby was curious to know what arrangements Nathan was going to make regarding it.

Hugo was going to be away that week. He was taking his sister and her children away for a short break, so Nathan wouldn’t be asking for time off as the two of them would be needed at the surgery.

She wasn’t expecting him to discuss his plans with her as they only ever spoke about surgery matters, apart from the one occasion when she had asked him what he was planning for Christmas and received an evasive answer.

So she was surprised when one morning as they waited for the surgery to start he said, ‘I can’t make up my mind about the half-term break. Whether I should enrol Toby for the play group they have at the school during holidays for children with working parents, or take Dad up on his offer to have him while I’m here. What would you do if you were me, Libby?’

‘I’m not sure,’ she told him, concealing her surprise at being asked. ‘I imagine that your father would love to have him, but he
was
looking forward to a complete rest after all the years as senior partner here. On the other hand, he might be finding that he has more time on his hands than he wants now, and from Toby’s point of view there is the attraction of the river and the fishing.

‘But the play group is well organised and well attended and Toby would be with some of his school friends. Why don’t you ask him which he would like the best?’

‘I know what he’ll say to that,’ he replied whimsically. ‘It will be Grandfather Gallagher and the river. Maybe it won’t be too taxing for Dad if you can manage on your own for the first hour in the morning and the last couple of hours at night. Can you, Libby?’

‘Yes,’ she told him steadily. ‘I’ll fit in with whatever is best for Toby. Just let me know when you’ve decided. I’m having a week off myself early next month but Hugo will be back by then and half-term will be over.’

‘Are you going away? Or staying local?’ he questioned.

‘Local, but not too local,’ she told him, ‘just far enough away to have some time to myself.’

‘And you are not going to tell me where?’

‘No,’ she said equably, and went to start her day at the Swallowbrook practice with a vision of a house on an island that she had arranged to rent for the week.

The morning was progressing like most other mornings at that time of year, a few coughs and sniffles, mixed with patients who were there because they had more serious anxieties to consult their doctors about, and once again there was the gathering of the willing and the unwilling who had come to have their flu jabs.

One of the patients was a young pregnant woman whose baby was almost due. She’d come to the surgery because of severe indigestion and when her name was called she got slowly to her feet.

Libby was standing in the doorway of her consulting room, waiting to usher her inside, when suddenly she let out a scream of pain and clutched herself around the waist.

‘I think it’s the baby,’ she gasped. ‘I thought the pains I’ve been having every so often were indigestion as I’m not due until next week, but this is different.’

‘A week too soon is nothing when it is a first baby,’ Libby told her, and taking her by the arm drew her quickly inside.

Nathan was saying goodbye to one of his patients at the other end of the corridor that separated their consulting rooms and took in the situation immediately. As she was helping the distressed woman on to the bed nearby he appeared and stood by as she checked to see if it
was
the baby on its way.

‘I can see the head already,’ she said quickly. ‘See for yourself, Nathan.’

He didn’t need to be asked twice and when he’d done so asked with low-voiced urgency, ‘Have you ever done a delivery before?’

She shook her head. ‘I know the procedure but have never had to put it into practice.’

‘I have,’ he said reassuringly. ‘I’ve done dozens of them where I’ve been for the last three years. In those kind of places one has to be jack of all trades.’ He turned to the anxious woman on the bed. ‘It’s going to be all right. What is your name?’

‘Jodie,’ she informed him between cries of pain.

‘So try to keep as calm as you can, Jodie,’ he said soothingly. ‘There isn’t going to be time to get you to hospital before the birth, but I’m used to delivering babies, so not to worry.’

‘I need to push!’ she cried.

‘Yes, I know you do,’ he told her, ‘but if you can wait for just a few seconds until I tell you to, everything is going to be fine. In just a few moments you’ll be holding your baby, so can you do that for me?’

‘I’ll try,’ she gasped, and with Libby beside him holding a clean towel that she’d taken from a cupboard by the bed he said, ‘Now you can push.’

With a huge heave she did so and seconds later a perfectly formed baby girl was wrapped in the towel and placed into her arms. As the tiny one expanded her lungs with a lusty cry a cheer broke the silence that had settled on the waiting room and the two doctors exchanged smiles.

In the euphoria of the birth Libby was forgetting everything except how the two of them, Nathan and herself, had shared such a special moment. Turning to him, she held him close for a few seconds before he dealt with the removal of the placenta.

‘I can see that we are going to have to do this more often if this is what I get,’ he said softly as she let her arms fall away. ‘If this is how it feels to see someone else’s child come into the world, can you imagine what it must be like with one of your own?’

‘No, I’m afraid I can’t,’ she told him flatly as he brought her back down to earth. ‘I stopped wishing for the moon a long time ago.’

‘Point taken,’ he replied in a similar tone, and turned back to the ecstatic new mother.

‘Could someone phone my husband to tell him that he has a daughter?’ Jodie asked in awed wonder. ‘He’s the trauma technician based at the fire station in the town centre.’