Sweet Obsession: Windy City Kink, Book 1 (33 page)

She paused in the elevator, looking at him with lifted eyebrows.

“You say you love me, but if you can’t even tell your parents about us, how the hell do we have any kind of future together?”

She stared at him. “I don’t know,” she whispered, hands twisting together.

“Then I guess we don’t,” he said bitterly as the doors slid closed between them.

He turned and drove his fist into the wall. Red hot pain sizzled from his knuckles up his arm and he shook his hand. Fuck! Then he kicked the suede bench sitting there.

Yeah, there was some good self-control. Had he learned nothing over the years? Christ.

What had just happened? Last night had been so great. Making love out on the patio under the stars, the city lights all around them and the night breezes drifting over them, had been spectacular. She’d told him she loved him. Finally. Tonight she’d been wearing his jewelry under that hot little dress. He knew because he’d seen it, before the party started, and goddamn if he hadn’t been half-hard all night thinking about it, picturing the tiny gold rings clasping her pretty nipples, the clip on her clit probably making her hot and wet every time she moved.

The party had been tons of fun, a huge success, Sasha’d been amazing and then…boom. She’d leveled him with her refusal to tell her parents about them—
ever
.

It was his worst nightmare.

He trudged into his bedroom, alone. Another string of curses ran through his head as he stripped off his clothes and climbed into bed.

A hot spear stabbed through him. He gritted his teeth against the pain, forcing himself to relax and breathe. All those memories streamed back, that gut-wrenching feeling of not being good enough. All those years of trying to prove himself. All those years of working his ass off, for her. Finally he’d come back to Chicago, he’d found her and it was all working out so perfectly. She said she loved him. But apparently he still wasn’t good enough for her to acknowledge their relationship.

Sasha rode home in the back of the taxi, staring out the window with burning eyes. She was not going to cry. Not here in a taxi, for God’s sake. Her chest ached and her stomach was a stone. The city lights passed by in a blur as she wrestled with hurt and anger and, most of all, confusion.

His question kept replaying over and over in her mind—how could they have any future together?

Truthfully, she’d wondered that all along. How could they? She knew he still wanted to do kinky things to her. How could she have a relationship with a man like that? And how could she ever tell her parents that she was seeing Jack again?

Kevin was asleep of course when she got there, his door closed. Was Emma in there with him? She shrugged. Whatever. That was their business.

But it only made her feel more alone as she slipped out of her pretty new dress. In front of the mirror, she studied the little gold rings on her nipples and a wave of sadness washed over so fiercely her knees went weak, and she clutched the edge of her dresser. The erotic jewelry on her nipples and pussy had primed her, aroused her, all night making her think of sex with Jack. She couldn’t wait for the party to end so they could be alone.

He’d told her he loved her.

And she’d told him that too. God, what a mistake she’d made in making that confession too soon.

She replaced the accessories into their small velvet lined box, the crystals sparkling at her in the dim light of the lamp. And a tear spilled out of her eye.

She swiped at it and found her pajamas, the black-and-white flannel ones with cows on them. They comforted her. When she got into bed, it felt so cold and empty she climbed out again and donned a pair of thick gray socks. Not quite like she’d imagined tonight playing out.

Whatever.

In her bed, in the dark, the tears came, she sobbed into her pillow until no tears were left and she finally fell asleep.

She was awoken by her cell phone warbling. With bleary eyes she made out the time on the screen as she grabbed it. Good Lord, nearly one in the afternoon! But then, it had probably been about four in the morning before she’d gotten to sleep.

The call display said, “Mom”.

“Hey, Mom.” She shoved her hair back.

“Sasha. Hi.” Mom’s voice sounded funny. Overly bright. “Where are you?”

“I’m at home. In bed.” She heard the swift intake of her mother’s breath. “Alone,” she added with an eye roll.

“Oh. Well, good. So.”

Sasha frowned. Her eyes felt like someone had sprinkled sand in them while she slept and her stomach felt all tied in knots. “What’s up, Mom?”

“Can you come over? Your father and I need to talk to you.”

“About what?”

“It’s…important. Could you come over please?”

She blew out a breath. “I guess I can come over. I need to shower and get dressed.”

“Okay. We’ll see you soon then. As soon as you can get here.”

She hung up and hauled her aching bones out of bed and into her shower. Dragged down by lethargy and sadness, she didn’t bother with makeup, just scraped her wet hair into a ponytail and dressed in a pair of jeans and a black T-shirt.

Kevin’s door was closed. She frowned. Should she knock and tell him she was going out? But if he was busy with Emma in there…nah. Quietly, she let herself out of the condo, locking the door behind her.

She definitely needed sunglasses, because the Sunday afternoon sun was stabbing her eyeballs. As she drove, she passed people out running, couples walking, some with dogs, some with kids. She sighed, wishing her life was that happy and normal.

She should never have gotten involved with Jack again. He was just…too much. Too much of everything, and he made her feel too much. All these years, she’d dated guys that left her feeling meh. Not much of anything, really. And honestly—that was better. Way better than these intense highs and lows, the agony of rejection, the heat of anger. She didn’t want to feel this way, dammit. It was better not to feel at all.

Keep telling yourself that, girl.

Her parents’ home was quiet as she let herself in. The alarm dinged somewhere in the house and then her mom appeared from the den. “Sasha. You’re here. Come in.”

“Hi, Mom.” She kissed her mother’s cheek. “What’s going on?”

“Come into the den. Your dad’s in here too.”

Sasha pushed her sunglasses up on top of her head as she followed Mom into the den. Dad sat on the couch with a cup of coffee and last month’s issue of
TechBiz
magazine.

Wasn’t that the one Jack had just been featured in?

Her insides twisted and her skin tingled.

Dad looked up at her. “Hi, chickadee.” Then he frowned. “Jesus, you look awful.”

“Gee thanks, Dad.”

Mom turned to peer at her more closely. “Oh my God,” she said. She touched her fingertips to her face, staring at Sasha. “Are you all right, honey?”

She swallowed hard, suddenly unable to say the words, “I’m fine” that she wanted to. Her throat constricted and her eyes stung again.

Not now.

She sucked in a breath and nodded. “Fine.”

“You look like…oh God.” Mom sank onto the couch.

Sasha took a seat too, fighting back the emotion that threatened to swamp her. “So what did you want to talk about?”

Mom looked at Dad and then they both looked back at her. Mom whispered, “It’s about Jack.”

Jack hefted the key in his palm as he approached Sasha’s condo Sunday afternoon. She’d given it to him and he was damn well going to use it. No fucking way were they done. He still wasn’t sure what he was going to say to her. Was he crazy to think that he and Sasha could be together, given the way her parents felt about him? Given the way she’d been shamed into denying her sexuality?

Because he could see that now, clear as the glass in his twenty-eighth floor windows.

He’d always known her parents didn’t approve of him. Yeah, he’d been a bit of a troublemaker in high school, but only after his parents had died and he’d been pissed off at the world. Mr. and Mrs. Bandel hadn’t thought he was good enough for their precious girl and that was
before
they’d caught him tying her up naked and spanking her. And from what had happened afterward, clearly they didn’t want Sasha having anything to do with him. Ever.

Yeah, he’d known that could be a major obstacle, but he’d hoped that the way he’d made something of himself, successful in his business, would help convince them that he was worthy of being with Sasha. But he hadn’t realized the extent to which they’d fucked her up. Godammit.

If giving up Shibari was the only way to keep her, he’d do that too. Although that gave him an uncomfortable feeling. Cutting out such an important part of who he was would be tantamount to living a lie. The kind of lie Sasha had been living all these years.
Fuck
.

He unlocked the door and stepped into the quiet condo. Sunlight poured in the big front window, gilding the shiny floor and highlighting the grain of the wood. Nobody was on the main floor, in the kitchen or living room. Shit, maybe she wasn’t even home.

He began to climb the stairs, holding the railing. A bedroom door opened, and he twitched a little. She was home. He continued up as footsteps sounded in the hall, and then came face to face with Kevin.

“Oh hey,” he said. But then his jaw went loose as he took in what Kevin was wearing.

A short black mini skirt left his long hairy legs bare all the way down to a pair of pointy-toed black pumps. Jack’s gaze tracked back up to the silky purple baby-doll camisole.

He blinked.

His skin went icy cold. Then burning hot.

“Fuck me,” Kevin groaned, closing his eyes. “Oh fuck.”

Jack opened his mouth. No words came out. Then he whipped around and covered his eyes. “I did not just see that,” he growled. “Fuck
me
!”

Heels tapped away from him on the hardwood floor and then a door slammed shut.

Jack turned and gazed at the empty hall.

What. The. Fuck.

He closed his eyes again, but the image of Kevin wearing a slinky top and mini skirt was blazed into his mind. And heels. Women’s clothes.

Jesus fucking Christ.

His legs sort of gave out and he lowered himself to the top step. He sat there and stared blindly down to the foot of the stairs.

Emma. Jesus Christ hanging on the cross. His sister was dating…that.

His head began to throb and his stomach churned. He rubbed his eyes. He couldn’t make sense of it, his brain just whirling in circles.

Why hadn’t Sasha told him? Or did she even know? A spurt of adrenaline had him leaping to his feet and rushing into her bedroom.

Empty.

He sat on the bed, hands dangling between his knees. What should he do?

He grabbed his cell phone and punched the button to call Emma. When she answered, he growled, “Where the hell are you?”

Silence. “Um. Jack? Is that you?”

“You know it is, dammit. Tell me where you are.”

“I’m having lunch with some friends.”

“Where are you?”

“Jesus, Jack, what’s going on? I’m at Jimmy’s Diner.”

“I’m coming there. Do not leave.”

He ended the call. He didn’t know where Sasha was, but he’d deal with her later. For Chrissake.

With a seething glance at Kevin’s closed bedroom door, he turned to the stairs and ran down them. The drive to the restaurant took twenty minutes, which was twenty minutes too long for him. He strode in and surveyed the place, only half full since it was now mid-afternoon. Emma sat at a table near the back with her friend, Eppy, who he’d met many times. She held her purse as if she were just leaving.

He headed their way.

Emma looked up at him, and her eyes went wide. “Jack. What is wrong?”

Eppy stood. “I’ll go now Jack’s here. Hi, Jack.” She shot Emma a look. “Hope everything’s okay.” Her mouth did a little grimace and then she waved as she walked away.

Jack slid into Eppy’s seat. “Kevin,” he growled. “You and he are done.”

She sat back and frowned. “What?”

“Done. You are not seeing him. Ever again. Got it?”

“You’re insane.” She studied him. “You look upset. What happened?”

“Nothing.” He closed his eyes. Christ, that made him sound like an idiot. And yet he couldn’t bring himself to tell Emma what he’d just seen if she didn’t know. He opened his eyes and leaned forward. “Have you slept with him?”

“That’s none of your business!” She gaped at him. “This is too much, Jack. You have officially gone over the overprotective brother line of what is acceptable.”

“No, I have not.”

“I thought you liked Kevin! We were just at the party last night and you were fine with us being together!”

“Yeah, well, things changed.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “I think you need some new meds. These mood swings are scary.”

“Don’t need fucking meds,” he muttered. He rubbed his aching forehead. “Maybe some Advil. Or some kind of tranquilizer.”