Sweetness (3 page)

Mrs. Jones and I catch up and discuss my move to
Manhattan. She seems pleased that I will be working at
my fathers company and we make plans for her to come
out and stay with me for a short vacation once we are
settled. As the day goes on I realize I haven’t yet seen
Mark. I went in search of my mother to find out where he
was. She tells me he is at a friend’s high school
graduation party and he would be here soon. She said
that since he is going to be leaving with me today, and
wouldn’t be home for a while so he wanted to see his
friends one last time before they all got split up and went
to college. I guess I understand that.

I am in a good mood and begin to wander away
from the party. I just want to enjoy some peace and quiet
at a place that never allowed it before. By the time my
head comes out of the clouds I find myself standing in
front of the playground. “How’d I wound up here?” I say
to myself, swallowing deeply and pushing back the
memories the start to flood my mind. I loved the
playground and used it quite often when I was little. It
was my own personal sanctuary. Mrs. Cross would take
Mark and me out here when things got intense in the
house. My father had the playground put in for my 5th
birthday. It was the last birthday we spent together as a
family.

The playground covers a huge area of the yard,
comparable to any public park. It has a large jungle gym
type structure in the middle composed of tunnels,
bridges, slides and poles to slide down. The whole area
has a color scheme of bright yellow, red, and blue. Off to
the far left side of the area is a tree house that stands
about four feet off the ground on wooden stilts. There are
stairs at the back of the tree house. A grey, plastic
climbing structure that resembles rocks on the front to
gain access to the wide platform that holds up the brown,
wooden, log cabin type house. It was Marks favorite
place to play when we were younger and he rarely let
girls in there. I giggle at the thought of him wearing his
Superman cape telling me to get off his rock. On the far
right side of the area there is a merry-go-round, an empty
sandbox, and a line of swings that are swaying in the
breeze. I doubt anyone ever comes out here any more but
judging from the newly planted flowers the area is still
kept in pristine condition. It is every kid’s dream…until
it became my nightmare.

Mom and Paul are arguing again…Ugh…I can’t stand
to hear any more of this. It is the same argument every time,
Paul gets drunk and tells my mother how worthless she is and
my mother cries and apologizes for having done nothing at all.
Paul and alcohol are a dangerous combination sometimes and I
honestly can’t bear to listen to a grown woman grovel over a
worthless piece of shit like Paul Maser. Him and his screwed
up kids can fuck off. I hate living here, I hate the Maser family
and I especially hate that my mother married a low life like him
when she had all the possibilities of a wonderful life with a
strong, powerful, man like my father. I gotta’ get out of here.

Since I was ready for a relaxing night at home I am
dressed in my comfy, grey sweatpants, and fitted black t-shirt
but as the nights are getting cooler I figured I would grab my
grey sweatshirt in the closet near the front door. As I descend
down the stairs I stop in my tracks by glass shattering against
the wall in the study and I can hear Paul cursing something
about how my mother doesn’t appreciate him. I continue down
the stairs, into the foyer and get my sweatshirt out of the closet
before picking up the pace to the back door.

The coolness of the fall air hits me in the face as I step
out onto the patio. The dim patio lights create a warm glow
leading up to the pool area and you could see that the newly
planted mums in full bloom around the perimeter. I walk down
the patio stairs and along the brick walkway to the pool area
with every intention to sit quietly and enjoy the sound of
music until Paul drinks himself unconscious. In the distance I
see the guesthouse is black inside and I take a sigh of relief. A
dark guesthouse means Glen is out for the night. With Paul’s
whore daughter out with the scumbag who picked her up on his
busted crotchrocket, there will be no one to interrupt me. As I
get closer to the pool area I can still hear shouting coming from
inside the house, I turn on my IPod as I approach the seating
area near the pool, damn it…it’s dead. The moon is so full and
bright it lights up the property enough so I can see the trees,
flanked all around our vast yard, in the distance. The trees are
nude this time of year due to the leaves falling sporadically as
the wind blows. I decide to walk toward the far left corner of the
property to where the playground is in hopes the voices will be
drowned out by the distance.

As I walk up to the area I focus on where I am stepping
in the darkness. I can hear crickets and smell the crisp fall air;
I even get a whiff of a wood burning fire in the distance. As I
reach the jungle gym I feel as if I am not alone. I continue to
feel uneasy as my eyes dart back and forth until I finally catch
a glimpse of Glen watching me as he sits on the platform of the
play structure with a bottle of Jack Daniels in his lap.

“To what do I owe the honor of her royal highnesses
presence this fine evening.” Glen slurred out his words as he
took another swig from the bottle that was half empty.

“Glen. You scared me. I didn’t realize anyone else was
out here. They’re fighting again,” I gesture with my thumb
pointing toward the main house, “-and I needed to get out of
there. I couldn’t listen to that shit anymore.”

“Oh, pooooor, poor, Princess.” Glen slurs in a way that
makes me cringe. It was at that very moment I am highly
aware we are alone. Glen has always hated me, hell the feeling
is mutual. Being alone with him makes my skin crawl. “How’s
about a drink? Oh, I forgot. Her majesty wouldn’t dare. Daddy
wouldn’t approve,” he says then covers his chest in pretend
shock.

“Fuck you Glen!” I shout and turn to leave. I take a
few steps back toward the house needing to put distance
between us.

“Is that an invitation?“ He yells back, as he uncrosses
his legs so they dangled off the structure. I can see him
smirking from my peripheral vision. Even in the darkness of
night, I can see his eyes twinkle with mischief.

Enough is enough! I am tired of him and his crap. Its
one thing I have to deal with one drunken asshole. I’ll be
damned if I am going to take Glen’s shit too.

“Are you kidding me?” I huff. I turn back toward Glen
and watch him stagger to his feet as he hops down off the
structure. “You’re a drunk and a loser just like your asshole
father. Do you think any respectable girl would ever let
you
touch her? Most of all me!” I can feel my face getting hot and
although it’s dark I can see Glen’s face filling with rage.

‘Don’t back down! Don’t back down!’ Is the mantra
going through my head as Glen slowly approaches. ‘Don’t back
down! Don’t back down!’

I am tired of Glen and Holly’s bullshit. They are so
damn mean to me all the time. They both called me Princess
because my father is wealthy and he makes sure Mark and I
have the best of everything. Glen is so close now that I can feel
his alcohol-laced breath on my face.

Don’t back down! Don’t back down!
“You think you’re better then me? You think you and
your whore mother are better than my family?” Glen is now
laughing in a way that is completely unnerving. “You and
your whore mother are not better then us, it was her that came
after my father because your father wouldn’t give a slut like her
the time of day anymore. It was your mother that ruined MY
family, not the other way around. My family was fine and
happy until your mother came sniffing around the shop like a
bitch in heat, flashing her money around.”
I can feel the anger burning in my stomach. I know
Glen’s right about my mother pursuing Paul because my father
was working more and more and spent a lot of time in the city.
Fuck that, I don’t care! The Masers pushed me around long
enough and I’m not going to let him talk about his family like
they are perfect. The Masers are FAR from perfect in my book.
“Fine and happy?! Ha. If your mother were so perfect
then your loser father wouldn’t have left her. If she was any
kind of a mother at all she would have raised you and your
bitch of a sister instead of killing herself to get away from the
three of you.” The words slid out of my mouth without me
thinking at all. I knew as soon as I said them I was in trouble.
Glen blanches at my words and takes a step back as if
I’ve slapped him. I take a few more small steps back as I watch
d him process my words. I can see the look of shock leaving his
face, as he stands up straighter, glaring down his nose at me.
Glen is pissed, beyond pissed. I could swear by the light of the
moon his eyes change to the color red, just like the devil
himself. His jaw clenches and his angry eyes bore into mine
while I take a few more small steps back. In a moment of selfpreservation I turned on a dime and take off toward the house. I
don’t make it but a few feet before Glen catches me with one
hand around my waist and the other hand covering my mouth,
preventing me from screaming for help. He is stronger and
taller than me so as he stands and pulls me backward, he lifts
me inches off the ground. I can do nothing but kick him and
nip his fingers with my teeth, hoping he will let me go. My
heart is racing and I can’t even imagine what he is going to do
to me.
“Where ya’ going Princess. The party’s not over yet. “
Glen grits in my ear. “You wanna’ hurt me? Na, no…if you
wanna’ hurt me, then I will hurt you right back. I’ll hurt you
and treat you like the cunt you are.”
Glen drags me back to where he was sitting before and
throws me up onto the platform. I try and slide back to get
away but in one swift movement he is next to me and catches
me by the ankle. I’m shaking, scared to death of him. I have
never been so scared in my entire life and Glen not only knows
it but he is smiling and taking great pleasure in making me feel
this way. Glen pulls me down and puts his body weight on top
of mine pressing me into the unforgiving plastic beneath me.
“Ut, ut, uh, Princess. Don’t run from me, it wouldn’t
be wise.” A disturbing smile plays on his lips. “Tit for tat,
Emma. You hurt me and now I am now going to hurt you.
Perhaps next time you speak to me you’ll be much nicer.”
His words are bitterly spoken into my ear as his hand is
again covering my mouth, only this time I’m frozen. I can’t
move. My whole body’s tense. I smell the whiskey on his
breath. My eyes are open so wide, from fear they feel as if they
are going to pop out of my skull. As I pray that divine
intervention will step in to help, it occurs to me that if I can’t
hear the screaming from the house than they won’t be able to
hear me either. Fuck! There is nothing or no one that is going
to help me.
While darting my eyes around the darkness to figure
out how I can get away, I am suddenly aware that Glen is now
fumbling with the string to my sweatpants, trying to loosen it.
Oh God, NO! Not this. Please God, make him stop. I feel the
waistband loosen. He grabs my pants at the apex of my thighs
from the outside and tugs them down around my knees. He
catches the top of my pants with his foot and kicks them down
so they slide down my legs and onto the ground below.
Leaning in close to my ear, his voice rumbling through
my head, he whispers, “I am going to let go of your mouth. If
you scream I will go upstairs in the main house and beat the
shit out of that little cock sucking brother of yours after I am
done with you. Your choice, Princess.”
He takes his hand off of my mouth and settles inbetween my legs. His hand slips into my panties and he inserts
his finger into me. I clench my jaw tight to absorb the pain
without making a sound. I can feel the hot tears running down
the sides of my face and into my ears. All I can hope for is that
he passes out from the alcohol before he actually finishes what
he started. Maybe he is just trying to scare and embarrass me
and he won’t really go through with this.
“Please Glen,” are the only words I can get out of my
dry mouth and past the lump in my throat that is threatening
to choke me.
“Oh, no need for begging princess. You’ll get what you
deserve, in due time. I am going to enjoy this.” He inserts a
second finger and his free hand slides up my shirt. My nipples
harden when the cold air hits them. Glen moans as he bites and
pinches them. His touch is harsh and cruel not at all like the
gentle way you see men touch women intimately in movies.
Removing his fingers from inside me, Glen tears my
panties away from my body. My body flinches from the
coldness of the air. Fear pulses inside me. “Please. Glen don’t.
I’m a virgin.” I am trying as hard as I can to keep calm in
hopes that I can reason with him. From the smirk on his face I
know that’s not going to happen.
“A VIRGIN! Well, well Princess. I’m honored. Perhaps
I misjudged you.” He stills for a second and I have a brief
moment of hope that he will come to his senses, but then a
devilish grin creeps across his face. “I am going to enjoy this,”
he announces as he puts the head of his penis in between my
folds.
Another rush of tears stream down my temples as I feel
Glen grab my hips and pull me closer, ramming into me with
one harsh thrust. The pain is excruciating. My heart is beating
so fast I swear it is going to pound right out of my chest. The
pain is forcing all the air from my lungs and just as I am about
to release the cry building up in my chest, I remember what he
said he would do to Mark if I screamed. He stills for a moment
gaging my reaction then slides out slightly and swiftly moves
back inside me, filling me with everything he has. Glen stills
again and asks me if it hurts. I don’t know how to respond. Do
I let him know that the pain is unbearable? Or do I lie and say
that I’m fine? I don’t think there is a right answer that won’t
set him off, so I say nothing. He rams into me again and the
look on my face gives me away. The look on his face tells me he
knows he is hurting me and enjoying every minute of causing
me pain. He asks me again if it hurts and again I say nothing.
He quickens the pace for I can’t even imagine how long.
The alcohol is preventing him from reaching his climax
quickly but by now it doesn’t matter. My body is numb. My
soul is numb. Glen took something from me I will never get
back. This is not how a girl wants her first time. I always
imagined being in love, with a man who would whisk me away
and we would live happily ever after. But instead, I get to
remember my first time being raped by a psychopath.
I focus on the bright, full moon hanging high above my
head. My body’s numb and more relaxed as the pain subsides
and the tears stop flowing. I don’t even think I’ve blinked as I
stare off into the distance trying to focus on anything other
than what is happening. Just as I thought the worst is over
Glen’s thrusts became harder and harder as he becomes closer
to finding his release. A moment later I feel his thighs tense up
and his body becomes rigid. With a vicious growl he curses
loudly and pins down my body with the entire weight of his. I
can hear his breath becoming more controlled, but he is not
moving. If there is a God, Glen Maser just died.
“Glen…Glen? Get off me?” My voice is shaky. I am
not sure if he is done punishing me yet. He’s still, not moving.
I poke him and he doesn’t respond. He is passed out cold. It
takes everything in me to roll him off. As I push his torso with
the palm of my hands he groans. I push harder, pulling him out
of me in the process. I wince in pain but move quickly. He is
now lying on his back snoring and I contemplate choking the
life out of him but I am too scared. I need to get as far from him
as possible. I hop off the platform, find my pants, and pull my
sweats back on. The soreness between my legs prevents me
from walking correctly. The burning sensation is so painful
tears spring up in me again.
From the light of the moon I can see that the yellow
plastic has a small amount of blood on it proving that my
virtue is no longer in tact. I rip Glen’s shirt off his body and
search for the bottle of booze he had been drinking before. I pour
the liquid onto the platform and scrub it with his shirt the best
I can to remove the blood. I don’t want anyone to see what he
has done to me, and start asking questions.
With his pants down around his thighs it’s than that I
notice Glen has my blood on him as well. I pour the remaining
whiskey on his dick in hopes it would burn so bad the next day
he would never do that to me again. It must have stung a little
because even in his inebriated state, the moment it touches him
he flinches and pulls himself into the fetal position but he never
wakes up. It is cool out here and he is half naked. I hope he
freezes to death, was the only thought that crosses my mind as
I quickly make my way back up to the main house.