Swim the Fly (23 page)

Jeez, so much for playing it cool.

I’M STARING AT THE CHANGING ROOMS,
waiting for Kelly to emerge wearing her next bikini, when I notice that if you wanted to, you could easily peek over the stall divider and spy on the person next to you.

I look over at Coop and Sean and I can see by following their gaze that they’re thinking the exact same thing.

“What do you think about this one?”

I turn back and see Valerie holding up a powder-blue bikini with a kind of halter top and miniskirt bottom.

“What?” I say, keeping one eye on the guys. “Oh. I don’t know. It’s nice, but it doesn’t seem like Kelly.”

“Not for her, silly.” Valerie spins the hanger around, considering the suit. “For me.”

“Oh.” I get a jolt of panic. I’m suddenly feeling protective of Valerie. Like I don’t want Coop and Sean ogling
her. Maybe because she was so nice to me last night. “You don’t really want to try on bathing suits, too, do you?”

“Maybe,” she says. “It’s something to do, right? We’re going to be here for a while.” She takes another suit off the rack. A wine-colored tankini with streaks of white. “I’ll give these a try. I’ll be right out.”

Valerie heads back to the changing rooms before I can think of anything to say that would stop her.

As soon she’s out of earshot, Coop and Sean leap from the couch and hurry over to me.

“Dude, this is our chance,” Coop says.

Sean is practically vibrating. “You could totally see over that stall divider if you stood on a chair, and don’t tell me you didn’t notice that because I know you did.”

“Yeah, it crossed my mind,” I say with a mixture of excitement and apprehension.

“All we have to do is take turns pretending to try on bathing suits in one of the stalls next to the girls.” Coop’s got his sinister half smirk going. “It’s perfect. It’s almost as if God wants us to succeed in our summer goal.”

“Right,” I say. “I’m sure God’s got nothing better to do than to help us see a naked girl.”

“
Two
naked girls,” Sean corrects.

“Besides,” I say, “shouldn’t we be focusing on trying to see Mandy Reagan? Just in case Cathy doesn’t accept that picture.”

“Mandy Reagan isn’t naked right now just beyond those doors,” Coop says. “Come on. Opportunity is ringing
the damn doorbell and we’re wasting valuable time here. I’ll take Kelly first. And Sean, you can check out Valerie.”

Sean crosses his legs like he’s got to take a piss. “Holy crap. I can’t believe this is going to happen. If I get to see Valerie nude, you can kill me because my life will be complete.”

“Hold on a second,” I say. “What if we get caught? I mean, it’s pretty easy to see someone peeping over the stall wall from out here.”

“That’s where you come in, dawg.” Coop smacks my back. “You run interference while we’re in there and then we’ll do the same for you.”

“I don’t think we should do this.” I can’t believe I just said that. I’ve been imagining Kelly naked ever since I laid eyes on her. And seeing Valerie would be an amazing bonus. But I don’t know. I feel weird about this. Like it’s not right or something. Jesus, what the hell’s happening to me?

“That’s hilarious, dude.” Coop laughs. “You almost had me. Come on, Sean. Let’s go get something to try on. Before it’s too late.”

Sean and Coop head over to the men’s section, and I’m standing here feeling like one of those cartoon characters with a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other. “Naked, naked, naked.” That’s all the devil is saying. Like he’s got a one-track mind. Or just a very limited vocabulary. “Naked, naked, naked.”

And then there’s the angel whispering, “What about
Valerie? All she wanted to know was if you were feeling okay. And now you’re going to help your friends spy on her? What kind of person does that?”

Just then, Kelly steps from her stall, wearing a shimmering rainbow bikini that changes color as she moves.

“This one’s pretty cool, huh?” Kelly says. “It’s like a party.” She shimmies back and forth in front of the three-way mirror, entertaining us both with the disco-ball effect.

“It’s hypnotizing,” I say, totally hypnotized.

“Where’s Val?”

“You inspired her. She’s trying on a couple of bathing suits.”

Kelly stops dancing and looks at me through the reflection. “Really?”

“Yeah. She found a couple bikinis she liked.”

“That’s so unlike her.” Kelly laughs and then goes back to admiring herself. I don’t blame her; if I looked like that, I’d spend my entire life in front of the mirror.
“Naked,”
the devil whispers in my ear.

“I’m going to get this one,” Kelly says. “You almost can’t stop looking at it.”

“I know
I
can’t,” I say before I can restrain myself.

Kelly laughs.

I feel my cheeks, my neck, prickling.

“Okay, that’s one. I need two more.” She turns and heads back to her changing room.

Coop and Sean approach, each of them waving a couple of swim trunks.

“Wish us luck,” Coop says.

“Wait.” I reach out and grab both guys by the arm. “Don’t. This isn’t cool.”

Coop looks down at my hand like it’s covered in slime. “I’m sorry, what?”

“This isn’t cool,” I repeat.

“What are you talking about? This is the coolest thing ever. Now, let me go.” Sean pulls his arm from my grip. “Valerie’s only got two suits in there. I don’t want to miss anything.”

Coop gives me an are-you-nuts? look. “What’s gotten into you, dawg?”

“Nothing,” I say. But clearly something has.

“Good.” Coop nods. “Then keep an eye out for any trouble.”

“We need a signal,” I say, stalling. “What should I do if someone’s coming?”

“I don’t know.” Coop huffs. “Just say something like, ‘How are you doing in there?’ Then we’ll know to stay down. Okay?”

“Sure.” I take a deep breath. “That’s good.”

Coop and Sean head back to the dressing rooms. They aren’t in there five seconds when I see Coop’s head start to poke up from his stall.

He’s just about to peek over the wall into Kelly’s stall
when I am hit with a wave of guilt like you wouldn’t believe.

“How you doing in there?” I call out.

Coop’s head drops down immediately. “Fine,” Coop says. “Just trying on these suits.”

A moment later and Sean’s head starts to rise ever so slowly as he attempts to peer over at Valerie.

And I don’t know why I do it, but I grab my cell phone and speed-dial him. Sean’s ringtone starts to blare “The Real Slim Shady” and his head disappears as he falls off his chair, making a huge racket behind the door as he scrabbles to answer the phone.

“Hello?” Sean says. “Hello?”

But I’ve already hung up because Coop is making another play for Kelly.

“How’s it going in there?” I shout out, causing Coop to duck down again.

“Could be better,” Coop grumbles. “Maybe you could go get me a larger size in this one.”

A pair of red swim trunks fly out of Coop’s stall and hit me in the face.

Valerie calls my name softly from her changing room.

“Sorry,” I say to Coop, throwing the swimsuit back over the door. “I’m needed elsewhere.”

I make my way over to where Valerie is poking her head out from the stall.

“I don’t know about this one,” she says, her head tipped down, her hair falling in her face. “What do you
think?” She creaks open the door and stands there. Her feet crossed over one another and her hands pressed into her thighs.

Wow. Valerie’s got the powder-blue bikini on and she looks awesome. She’s curvier than Kelly but in a smokin’ hot way. I don’t remember actually ever seeing Valerie in a bathing suit. When she comes to the swim meets, she’s usually wearing shorts and a T-shirt.

“You look pretty,” I say.

“Yeah?” Valerie looks up, biting one side of her lip, like she doesn’t quite believe me.

“It matches your eyes.” Which it does but, honestly, that wasn’t the first thing I noticed.

“Should I get it?”

There’s something so shy and sweet about the way she says this that I have to smile. “Definitely,” I say. “But only if you want everyone at the beach to be jealous of you.”

I’m not sure why I said that, but I’m glad I did because it seems to make Valerie happy.

She laughs and her ears and neck go red as she waves me off. “Don’t be silly.” She shuts the door quickly and latches it.

The warm feeling I get at putting that smile on her face makes me all the more determined to stop Sean and Coop from doing what they are doing. It’s like I’ve been given the responsibility to protect the honor of these girls. I know it sounds sappy, but the nagging, pain-in-the-ass angel on my shoulder wants me to do the right thing.

Which turns out to be nothing more than stepping aside as the saleslady heads back to the changing rooms.

It’s perfect timing, because both Coop’s and Sean’s heads just start to pop up over the stall walls once again.

The look on the woman’s face is priceless. A giraffe could walk in the store right now and this woman’s eyes couldn’t be any bigger or rounder.

“I beg your pardon!” she calls out. “Just what is it you boys think you’re doing?”

Sean and Coop freeze for a split second, their mouths stuck in a comic-book surprised O shape.

Then, their heads drop down in unison.

“Both of you boys.” The woman pounds on their stall doors. “Come out of there immediately.”

“What’s going on?” Kelly calls from her changing room.

But nobody answers her.

Coop and Sean yank open their dressing-room doors and bolt past the saleswoman, who tries in vain to grab them.

“Come back here!” she shouts. But they don’t, of course. She glares at me, and I try to look as innocent as possible. “I’m calling security.” She huffs as she storms over to the front counter.

My cell phone beeps a second later. I get it from my pocket and flip it open. There’s a text from Coop.
Payback’s a bitch!
It makes me smile because I can just picture how pissed Coop and Sean are.

When Kelly and Valerie come out, they want to know what happened with Coop and Sean, but I just say that they were horsing around and got kicked out. I’ve accomplished what needed to be done; there’s no reason to narc them out.

“WHAT IS THIS?”
Ulf is holding up the Ziploc freezer bag I gave him, pinched between his thumb and forefinger at the corner like it’s full of baby vomit instead of crumpled bills and change.

“It’s the money,” I say. “For the class. A hundred dollars.”

I got to the country club a half hour early because I wore my sneakers this time instead of dress shoes and the ride’s a whole lot faster without blisters. So it’s just Ulf and me standing by the side of the pool. He twirls the bag around, studying it. I only had seventy dollars in bills, so I had to scrounge the rest up in quarters, dimes, and nickels.

“Do you think I am a bubble-gum machine?” Ulf says.

“No.” I shake my head.

“Most people, they get their parents to write a check.”

“Oh.”

“I do not like counting out change.” He shakes the bag, jingling the coins. “This cup of tea is not mine.”

“I can count it for you,” I say.

“Ah, yes. That is a very good idea.” Ulf unseals the Ziploc and pulls the paper money out.

I hold out my hand, expecting him to pass me the bag. But instead, he just smiles.

“You will count out the coins for me.” Ulf’s expression shifts like one of those hologram cards you dig out of a cereal box. Stone-faced, he flings his arm out, sending the change hurtling through the air,
splishing
into the water. “As you pick every one of them up off the bottom of the pool.” He looks at his watch. “You have twenty-three minutes. If you are not completed by the time class begins, you will do it all over again. I suggest you get started.” Ulf moves to a lounge chair and gets comfortable. He snaps open a newspaper and that’s that.

Goddamn it. There must have been like two hundred coins in that bag.

I start to tug my pants off when I hear Ulf call out from behind his paper, “In your clothes.”

I stare at the pool, at the glint of the coins scattered on the blue bottom, their shapes morphing with the soft ripples on the surface.