Taffy Sinclair 004 - Taffy Sinclair and the Romance Machine Disaster (8 page)

Pink
certainly is a thoughtful person, isn
'
t he?
"
I said when Mom and I met at the breakfast table the next morning.
"
I think you should take your flowers to work with you today and set them on your desk so that he can see how much you appreciate them.
"

Mom looked at me and raised an eyebrow the way she always does when she says something like
"
You
'
re nuts,
"
or
"
I think you
'
ve flipped,
"
except this time she didn
'
t say anything because her mouth was full of toast.

"
I mean, how many guys would be so concerned about your health? Not very many. He
'
s someone you can really count on.
"

Mom took a drink of coffee and looked at me over the rim of her cup.
"
Why all this sudden interest in Pink?
"
she asked suspiciously.

"
Oh, it isn
'
t sudden,
"
I assured her.
"
I
'
ve liked Pink ever since you started going out with him.
"
Then I crossed my fingers behind my back for good luck and kept on talking.
"
Actually, I
'
ve always been very impressed with what a super person he is. And to think that now he even wants to take you to Ricardo
'
s. You can tell that he really cares about you.
"

"
Jana!
"
Mom exploded.
"
I
'
m tired of hearing about Pink. I
'
m also tired of taking his phone calls and accepting his flowers and hearing his marriage proposals. You might say that I
'
m just plain tired of Pink. Now may we please change the subject?
"

"
Sure. I have to leave for school anyway.
"
At least I tried, I thought. I gave her a quick peck on the cheek as I grabbed my lunch off the counter and headed for the door.

Mom isn
'
t cooperating one bit, I thought. Poor Pink. He was such a terrific guy and he really cared for her. How could she be so heartless? It would be different when my friends talked me up to Randy. He would be so impressed that he would see me for what I really am, and he would remember what a super time we had on our date.

As I walked along, I tried to picture Taffy Sinclair
'
s face when Randy finally got around to announcing that he had my name all along. He would probably be on the
playground, or maybe in the Media Center. Then he would look at me and smile that kind and sensitive smile and say,
"
I matched up with Jana Morgan because she is such a super person and we have so much in common
. We were meant for each other.
"
Then Taffy would start sobbing loudly, and I, being as kind and sensitive as Randy Kirwan, would say,
"
Poor Taffy Sinclair. We should all feel sorry for her.
"

My fabulous daydream was interrupted by the sudden thought that I still did not have anything specific for Katie to say to Randy I hurried toward school. Maybe she would have some ideas.

When I got to school, the first person I saw was Beth, and she was hanging around the bike rack the way she was supposed to do. I had been watching her only for a minute when Randy came riding onto the playground. He was going so fast that I was sure he was going to run into the bike rack, but he hit his brakes, throwing gravel all over the place and stopping only about an inch from the rack.

I ducked behind a tree and watched Beth walk casually over to him. I was too far away to hear what they were saying and I wasn
'
t very good at reading lips, so I just stood there
watching and holding my breath.

"
Jana Morgan. Why are you hiding behind that tree?
"
It was Katie, and she startled me so badly that I jumped a foot off the ground.

"
You didn
'
t have to
announce it to the whole world,
"
I said, giving her a poison-dart look.

Katie looked past me to where Beth and Randy stood talking.
"
Oh, brother,
"
she said.
"
Now I get it. Beth is over there giving Mr. Conceited the big word on how wonderful you are.
"

"
So?
"
I said.
"
And don
'
t call him Mr. Conceited. He happens to be a fantastic person.
"

Katie looked as if she was getting ready to say something else, but at that same moment Beth came running up. She was out of breath and grinning like crazy.

"
I did it. I said everything you told me to say.
"

I collapsed against the tree with relief.
"
Great!
"
I said.
"
What did he say? Tell me everything.
"

Beth got a funny look on her face.
"
Well
. . .
he didn
'
t actually say anything. He just sort of shrugged.
"

"
That
'
s probably because he didn
'
t want you to see how jealous he is,
"
I said.
"
Just wait. You
'
ll see.
"

I avoided looking at Katie. I knew what she was probably thinking. It didn
'
t matter. Nothing did, except getting Randy back.

Christie was waiting for him by the lockers just the way I had told her to do. I was so excited that my hands were shaking when I opened my own locker and got out my books. Once Christie got through with him, Randy would never speak to Taffy Sinclair again. And then at recess Melanie would convince him that I was kind to animals, especially small, helpless ones that were stuck in traffic. He would be so impressed that it wouldn
'
t matter even if I couldn
'
t think of a speech for Katie.

I didn
'
t get a chance to talk to Christie before the bell rang so I slipped her a note during class. It said:

DEAR CHRISTIE:

WHAT DID YOU SAY TO RANDY AND WHAT DID HE SAY BACK?

LOVE,
JANA

A few minutes later she passed a note back to me. It said:

DEAR JANA:

I SAID WHAT YOU TOLD ME TO SAY ABOUT TAFFY SINCLAIR AND HE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING. HE JUST SHRUGGED.

LOVE,
CHRISTIE

I read that note over and over, thinking about how Randy must be feeling. He had to realize that Taffy was a terrible person and that he had better ask me to go for pizza Saturday if he didn
'
t want some other boy to ask me. I sighed. I almost wished that Melanie wasn
'
t going to talk to him at morning recess. That would be a perfect time for him to come up and start talking to me. Of course there was still lunchtime, and we would have more time then.

At recess, I tried not to stare at Randy and Melanie, but I could see that they were deep in conversation. Melanie was doing all the talking and Randy was listening with a serious look on his face. It was working. I could tell, and when Randy arid I were back together, I would have my best friends to thank.

I told my friends to go ahead to the cafeteria and get a table at lunchtime, and I stopped in the girls
'
bathroom to comb my hair and make sure I looked okay. I sighed, wishing I had sneaked some of Mom
'
s lip gloss into my knapsack before I left home this morning. Then I combed my hair a second time and hurried toward the lunchroom. I knew that Randy was probably wondering where I was. My hands were so sweaty that the top of my lunchbag was getting damp as I went inside.

My friends were at our usual table, and I headed toward them trying to act casual and look for Randy at the same time. At first I didn
'
t see him. All I saw was my friends. All four of them were frowning, and Beth was nodding toward the back of the room. I looked in that direction to see what they were all so upset about. I stopped cold. There was Randy Kirwan, and he was the only boy at a table full of girls.

My knees buckled, and I sat down beside Katie with a thud. I didn
'
t look at my friends. I knew they would all be feeling sorry for me and have sympathetic looks on their faces. All I could see was Randy and that table full of girls. Lisa Snow. Alexis Duvall. Sara Sawyer. Kim Baxter. Mona Vaughn. And, of course, Taffy Sinclair. Randy was grinning like crazy and talking to those girls as if he were the biggest deal in the world. Taffy was sitting across from him and she was hanging on every word.

Suddenly I realized that I didn
'
t really know Randy as well as I thought I did. In fact, I had been wrong about him all along. All of a sudden, I wanted to tell him so. I stood up and marched over to the table where he sat with all those girls.

Randy glanced up. Boy, did he look surprised when he saw me standing there. All the girls looked at me, too. Especially Taffy. She was glaring at me with poison-dart eyes. No on
e said anything. It was as if I
were in the middle of a stage and the audience was waiting for me to begin my solo. I didn
'
t care. I had something to say and I was going to say it.

"
You think you are so wonderful, Randy Kirwan,
"
I began.
"
Well, you aren
'
t wonderful at all. You
'
re conceited! In fact, you aren
'
t just the most conceited boy in Mark Twain Elementary. You
'
re the most conceited boy in the world!
"

Randy
'
s face flushed a bright red and he looked at me with a funny expression.

"
And furthermore, you think it
'
s such a big deal to keep your girl matchup a secret. You think girls will fall all over you to find out who it is. Well, maybe some of them will, but I won
'
t! I don
'
t care! In fact, I hope you didn
'
t get me. I hope you got . . .
"
I fumbled for an instant trying to think of the worst possible person for him to match up with.
"
. . . WIGGINS!
"
I shouted triumphantly.

I felt so much better I thought I
'
d die, and I turned around and stomped back to my table. I knew that the cafeteria had gotten deathly quiet. I also knew that everybody was looking at me. I didn
'
t care. I sat there laughing in my mind, thinking about Randy matching up with Wiggins and taking her to Mama Mia
'
s for pizza Saturday after the football game.

"
Pssst. Jana. Look!
"

Randy was leaving the cafeteria, and he was walking out with Taffy Sinclair.

Every time I looked at Randy all afternoon, he was looking at Taffy Sinclair, and most of the time she was looking back. Well, she can have him, I thought. I don
'
t know what I ever saw in him. I don
'
t know why the computer gave me his name in the first place. That stupid computer made a big m
istake. Romance Machine? Huh!

I c
ould hardly wait for Mom to get home, and I met her at the door.
"
Boy, you should have heard me tell off Randy Kirwan in the cafeteria today,
"
I bragged.
"
He thinks he
'
s so smart. I don
'
t know what I ever saw in him in the first place.
"

"
Oh, hi, Jana,
"
Mom said in a faraway voice.
"
How was your day?
"
She hung up her coat and glanced around, but she didn
'
t really look at me. Instead, it was almost as if I were invisible and she was looking straight through me.

"
I said, I really told off Randy Kirwan in the cafeteria,
"
I repeated. It didn
'
t register. She still had that blank stare so I went on,
"
and then I took Wiggins hostage and bombed the school.
"

"
That
'
s nice, dear,
"
she said.
"
I
'
ll call you when dinner
'
s ready.
"

I was starting to get worried. This wasn
'
t like her.
"
Earth to Mom. Earth to Mom. Come in. This is Jana.
"

Instantly her glazed look disappeared.
"
Oh, Jana. I
'
m so sorry,
"
she said, and I could tell that she really meant it.
"
I
'
ve had a terrible day. Pink hasn
'
t stopped by my desk to talk to me once today. He must be angry with me over something, but I can
'
t imagine what. I
'
m worried sick. Now, what were you saying?
"
Her eyes suddenly opened wide.
"
There was a bomb threat at school!
"

"
No, Mom. I was only teasing. Didn
'
t you have lunch with Pink? You two have lunch together almost every day.
"

Mom shook her head.
"
I saw him leaving the building at noon alone. I can
'
t imagine what
'
s wrong. I just hope he wasn
'
t meeting another woman.
"

I could see that Mom was really upset, but for the life of me I couldn
'
t understand her.
"
Mom?
"
I asked.
"
Aren
'
t you the same person who was saying just this morning at breakfast that Pink was bugging the daylights out of you and that you didn
'
t want to talk about him anymore?
"

Mom looked sheepish.
"
I know that
'
s what I said,
"
she admitted. Then her eyes got misty.
"
But that was before he started ignoring me. I guess I didn
'
t realize just how much he meant to me until now. I know this is going to sound strange, but I really miss him. If only he hadn
'
t come on so strong before, practically suffocating me with attention. Maybe I would have seen him for what he really is. Kind . . . sensitive . . . caring.
"

She moved into the kitchen, still mumbling to herself about Pink. I shook my head and went to my room. Men! I thought. They either drove you nuts telling you how much they cared about you, like Pink used to do and like Curtis Trowbridge. Or else they ignored you altogether like Pink and Randy Kirwan were
doing now. Women ought to get even with them, I thought. We ought to band together and go on strike!

When I walked to school the next morning I tried not to think about Randy and how it was Thursday, our one-week anniversary. Last Thursday was the day that he had called to ask me out for pizza after his football game. It seemed longer than a week ago. It seemed more like a year.

There
'
s no use thinking about Randy anymore, I told myself. I took care of him yesterday.

I spotted my four best friends beside the swings. They were with a group of other girls, and they were all talking excitedly. I stopped when I saw who the other girls were. Lisa Snow, Sara Sawyer, Kim Baxter, and Alexis Duvall. All the girls who had been sitting with Randy in the cafeteria yesterday except for Mona Vaughn and Taffy Sinclair. What did they want? I wasn
'
t sure I even wanted to find out.

Alexis saw me first, and she started smiling and waving like crazy for me to join the group.
"
Come here,
Jana,
"
she called.
"
We have something important to tell you.
"

I hesitated for a moment, but then all the others started smiling and waving, including my four best friends, so I went over to see what was going on.

Everybody started talking at once.
"
You were right about Randy Kirwan,
"
said Kim.

"
He is the most conceited boy in Mark Twain Elementary,
"
said Sara.
"
We should have seen it ourselves.
"

"
But he
'
s not the only boy who
'
s conceited,
"
Lisa added.
"
All the sixth-grade boys are.
"

I couldn
'
t believe what I was hearing.
"
But all of you were sitting with Randy yesterday,
"
I said.
"
You were acting as if you thought he was great.
"

"
We did—
then
,"
said Alexis.
"
But we got to thinking about what you said to him, and we decided that all sixth-grade boys are jerks.
"

"
Including Randy Kirwan,
"
said Lisa.
"
And we don
'
t care if any of them tell us who they matched up with. Where do they get off thinking they can just refuse to tell who their girl matchups are? Every one of them has some kind of ego problem, if you ask me.
"

"
If they don
'
t need us, we don
'
t need them!
"
said Sara.
"
We ought to find some way to get even.
"

"
Then you
'
re not mad at me anymore?
"
I asked cautiously
.

"
Mad at you?
"
echoed Kim.
"
You
'
re the one who opened our eyes.
"

"
Not only that,
"
added Melanie.
"
It took a lot of nerve to tell him off the way you did.
"

As I stood there listening, I suddenly remembered what I had been th
inking yesterday after Mom told
me about her troubles with Pink, and I got this great idea.
"
Why don
'
t we go on strike?
"
I said.

"
Strike?
"
asked Christie.

"
Yeah,
"
said Beth.
"
What do you mean?
"

I smiled triumphantly.
"
Boys are always asking us for things. You know. Like borrowing things.
"

"
Oh, I get it,
"
said Melanie.
"
Things like notebook paper. Scott Daly never has notebook paper, and he
'
s always borrowing it from me.
"

"
And what about pencils?
"
asked Sara.
"
Either they don
'
t have them at all or the points are broken off and they
'
re too short to sharpen.
"

"
Don
'
t forget homework,
"
added Katie.

"
Especially math homework,
"
said Kim.

Beth
'
s face lit up and she said,
"
Just think. If we go on strike like Jana said, they
'
ll have to bring their own stuff to school or they
'
ll get in trouble, and they
'
ll have to do their own homework.
"

"
We
'
ll teach them a thing or two,
"
said Alexis.
"
And believe me, they really deserve it. Boys are such jerks.
"

"
BOYS—ARE—JERKS! GIRLS—ON—STRIKE! BOYS—ARE—JERKS! GIRLS—ON—STRIKE!
"
someone started chanting. The rest of us tried to join in, but we were laughing so hard that we could barely stand up, and we almost didn
'
t hear the bell.

By the time we went to our lockers and got our books, practically every girl in the sixth grade was in on our plan. You would have thought that Wiggins was in on the whole thing, too, because right after she took roll she cleared her throat and said,
"
All right, boys and girls. Get a clean sheet of paper and a pencil. We
'
re going to have a spelling quiz on the words on page 56 of your spelling book.
"

I smiled to myself and got ready for what was about to happen. An instant later someone poked me on the left shoulder.

"
Jana,
"
whispered Clarence Marshall.
"
May I borrow a sheet of paper?
"

I turned around slowly, gave him a huge sigh of boredom, and said,
"
Sorry, Clarence. I
'
m all out.
"
Then I picked up my notebook and held it where he could see it and flipped through about a hundred sheets of blank paper.

Across the room Mark Peters got a panicked look on his face as both Alexis Duvall and Kim Baxter
refused to lend him a pencil. Joel Murphy was poking through the wadded up sheets of paper in the wastebasket. Keith Masterson was attacking the pencil sharpener where the stub of a pencil he had pushed into it had disappeared. Even Mr. Conceited himself, Randy Kirwan, was rummaging through his desk looking for a sheet of paper that di
d not have writing or drawings o
f airplanes on both sides.

Naturally all the commotion didn
'
t go unnoticed by Wiggins.
"
Class! What seems to be the problem? Have I asked the impossible?
"

A few girls giggled, and most of the boys looked around helplessly. Finally Mark Peters spoke up.

"
We need to borrow some paper and pencils, but none of the girls will lend us any,
"
he said.

Wiggins didn
'
t say anything for a minute, and I thought I could detect that she was struggling not to smile. Good old Wiggins, I thought. She understands.

She did understand.
"
Well, Mark,
"
she said solemnly.
"
Why don
'
t you boys have paper and pencils of your own? You know that it is your RESPONSIBILITY to have them.
"

"
I just ran out of paper yesterday,
"
he offered.

"
I left mine at home,
"
said Joel.

"
Me, too.
"

"
Me, too.
"

"
I broke my pencil when I fell off my bike.
"
Suddenly the air was full of boys shouting out excuses for not having any paper or pencils. Wiggins crossed her arms over her chest and listened to all of them. It was easy to see that she was unimpressed.