Taken By The Highland Wolf (The Clan MacGregor Book 2) (4 page)

"I know where Mr. MacAlpin's office is," I said, my voice sore and raw. "Follow me."

The walk to the magistrate's office was the hardest I had ever taken. Each footstep felt as though my feet were weighed down by rocks, and the closer we got the heavier they felt. It was as if my entire body was in rebellion against the action I was about to take. Once we had told someone what had happened it would become real, instead of the waking nightmare I felt as though I were living in. Iona's death would soon be down on record, and there would be no taking it back. No erasing it. And no waking up.

I raised a heavy hand and knocked on the magistrate's door. The sound of it reverberated through me and I wrapped my arms around myself as we waited.

"Miss Gordon?" asked Mr. MacAlpin when he opened the door. He looked over Camden and me with curiosity. "What are you doing here?"

"It's happened again, Mr. MacAlpin," I told him. My voice sounded very faint and far away in my ears. "Iona is dead."

"Glenna."

I looked up at the sound of Alastair's voice as he walked into the room. Mr. MacAlpin had sat Camden and me in his sitting room while he went to investigate the scene at Iona's home. I could not go back there; the pain of seeing her body again would have been unbearable. So the magistrate had sent word to Alastair back at the castle about what had happened and left us in his home while he attended to his duties. Camden and I had been sitting in heavy silence for hours.

"Alastair," I said with a sigh of relief at the sight of him.

"So it's true, then," he said as he crossed the room to me. "Are ye all right? The message said that ye found her."

I nodded sadly and tried to hold back another wave of tears.

"Ah, love, come here." He opened his arms to me and I rushed into them, so grateful that he was there.

"It's all right now, I've got ye. I promise ye it'll be all right."

I looked up at him with watery eyes and he brushed my hair away from my face. Then, using his thumb, he wiped away the tears from beneath my eyes.

There was a sound of shuffling from behind me and I remembered that Camden was still in the room with us. Alastair looked at him over the top of my head and I turned awkwardly to face him. The moment Alastair had entered the room I had forgotten everything else, and I had no explanation to give.

Camden stood up and took a step toward us, his hand outstretched to Alastair. "Camden Holme," he said by way of introduction.

"Alastair MacGregor." Alastair shook the smaller man's hand as he examined him. "Chief of Clan MacGregor. It's good to see ye on your feet and looking so well, Mr. Holme."

Camden started at the introduction, confusion flashing in his eyes as they traveled to me for a split second and then back to Alastair.

"We can thank Miss Gordon for the speed of my recovery. She was very good to me," he told Alastair.

"Aye, she's a soft heart. It was good of ye to stay here with her."

"I wouldn't dream of letting her out of my sight," said Camden.

Alastair didn't respond, but he shifted slightly in front of me, partially blocking me from Camden's view. I looked back and forth between them as they eyed each other silently. Alastair had a slight frown on his face, and I wondered if he had a sense of Camden's interest in me. I had not told him about what had transpired on our ride the day before. I had not been able to see any good coming from the revelation.

"Do you have to go to Iona's house now?" I asked Alastair, trying to break the tension that was growing palpable in the room.

"Yes," he said with a nod, "but I wanted to look in on ye first.  Though now that I'm here, I don't want to leave ye," he said softly, reaching out to take my hand.

"No, you have to go take care of this. I have to have justice for Iona. We cannot let whoever is committing these crimes get away with it. It's Iona, Alastair," I pleaded with him. "You must find this person."

He cupped my cheek in his hand and I closed my eyes, leaning into the comfort of his touch. It no longer mattered to me what Camden thought. I loved Alastair and I needed him near me.

"I will find them, Glenna, I promise ye that."

"I will take her back," said Camden. "There is no need for her to stay here now. I will escort her back to the keep."

Alastair clenched his jaw before nodding. "Aye, that would probably be best."

"I don't want to leave you," I said.

"I know, love, but ye must. I will be back with ye as soon as I can."

"All right," I agreed with a sigh.

"Mr. Holme," said Alastair to Cameron, "I would be very much obliged to ye if you were to keep an eye on Miss Gordon this afternoon. See that no harm comes to her."

"Aye, I'll guard her with my life."

Alastair jerked his head in a nod, and with a last look to me he strode out the door.

Once he had gone I sat back down heavily in the chair I had formerly occupied. While I was ready to be out of the magistrate's sitting room, I was not yet ready for the long ride back to the castle, as it was sure to either be full of questions from Camden or worse, none at all.

"So, that is the MacGregor," he said mildly, his eyes still on the doorway that Alastair had just walked through.

"Yes."

"He's quite... tall," he continued.

"Yes, I suppose he is, at that."

"He seems very fond of ye...."

I looked at my lap as my fingers moved idly, pleating the fabric of my gown. "Yes."

"But you're not engaged to be wed?" he asked.

"Not officially, no." This evasive line of questioning was even worse than I had thought it would be.

"And unofficially?" he pressed.

"Unofficially? Well, that's a bit more complicated."

He nodded and stood up, extending his hand to me. "It's been a hard day. We should be getting back."

I nodded and accepted his hand. He helped me out of the chair and we left the magistrate's offices.

The ride back to the keep was a silent one, each of us lost in our own thoughts. I wanted to say something to keep a distance from growing between us. Something that could make him understand why I had such affection for a man Camden must consider to be the devil himself. But I could not think of the words. So I stayed silent and tried to accept the inevitable loss of two friends on the same day.

***

The sun had long gone down on the day when there was a soft knock on the door of my bedchamber. Alastair had stayed in the village for the rest of the day, and had not been back in time for the evening meal. I had gathered my courage and went to find Camden to see if he would join me for dinner in the great hall. Thankfully he had greeted me with a smile, with no sense of distance between us.

I walked to the door and opened it to find a very tired-looking Alastair standing on the other side.

"I wasn't sure if I would see you this evening," I told him as he entered.

"I told ye that I would come for ye. Did ye think I would let you down?"

I shook my head and drew him deeper into the room.

Alastair sat on the bed and removed his boots, letting them drop heavily to the floor before lying back on the pillows.

"Come lie with me a while, Glenna. I'd have ye near me."

I curled up next to him on the bed, resting my head on his chest as his arm came around me.

"I'm sorry for your loss, love. Iona should not have met her end that way."

"She was so wonderful," I told him. "I confided so much in her. She was my first true friend since I came to stay here."

"I am sorry that it has taken people so long to warm to ye."

"It's not their fault. It must be very confusing for them to have me here. They are all very polite, but I don't think they quite know what to do with me, and so are very cautious. And how can I blame them? I may be Glenna Gordon today, but at any time I could be Lady Glenna MacGregor. I think they fear becoming overly familiar. But I believe that I may still be able to count Mr. Holme as a friend, though I was very doubtful of it earlier today. I was grateful that there was no awkwardness between us at dinner."

"He has an eye for ye, Glenna," said Alastair, his voice a low rumble.

"I know," I said quietly.

"And ye trust him, then?"

"He has been kind to me, Alastair. I do not encourage him, but I do welcome his friendship."

"To know ye is to love ye, Glenna. I cannot fault him for falling for ye. But I also canna say that I like it."

I looked up at him and smiled. "Are you saying that you're jealous?" I teased him.

"No, I am not," he said with a huff.

I laughed, my heart feeling a bit lighter. "I do believe you are. You're jealous, the fearsome Alastair MacGregor. Will wonders never cease?"

Grabbing me, Alastair pulled me bodily on top of him, his arms wrapped around my waist, and held me tight.

"Oh, aye? And what have I to be jealous of, then? You're mine, Glenna Gordon. I know that just as I know that the heart that beats in my chest beats for ye. I've no need to be jealous, for I know where your love lies. He can pine after ye all he wishes. I care not, so long as it goes no further than that." He pulled me close and kissed me swiftly. "Or maybe I should mark ye as my own, so that he knows just how taken ye are, aye?"

I squirmed as he nuzzled into my neck, the rough bristles of his beard tickling my sensitive skin. He kissed me softly, but soon the gentle caress of his lips turned more forceful as his mouth widened and he bit me gently, the pressure of his teeth slowly increasing as he suckled on the area. The feel of him demanded my attention, and I allowed him to distract me from my sorrow, if only for a little while.

"Maybe I'll give ye a love bite so bold that it can be seen straight across the great hall. Leaving no doubt in anyone's mind just to whom ye belong."

His words thrilled me. I had never thought that I would be attracted to a man who showed such possessiveness. Never thought that it would make me feel so safe or cherished to hear such sentiment.

Alastair pressed a gentle kiss to my shoulder and rolled us so that I was on my back and he half-covered me with his body.

His large, sure hands traveled down the length of my side and over the gentle flare of my hips before coming to rest on the generous curve of my backside.

"Have I ever told ye how much I love the feel of ye, lass?" he asked me as his hand gave me a firm squeeze.

"No, I don't think you have." I flushed warmly.

"Aye," he said with a lazy smile.

His hand moved back around to my hip and up to cup my breast.

"And these?" he asked, squeezing the soft, full globe. "Have I told ye how very fond I am of these?"

The heat in my body continued to rise and I shook my head.

His hand left my breast and he brushed his thumb across the fullness of my bottom lip.

"And your lips? Have I also forgotten to tell you how sweet they are?"

My lips parted slightly and his thumb slipped between them. Going on instinct, I bit down gently on the tip of it, and was rewarded with the flash of hunger I saw in his eyes. Encouraged by his reaction, I closed my lips around it and ran my tongue over the digit as I watched his face closely.

His throat bobbed as he swallowed and I could hear a low growl coming from deep in his throat, so I decide to bite his thumb a little harder.

His eyes fluttered closed for a moment and I heard him take a sharp inhale of breath.

"That's a dangerous game you're playing, love," his said, his voice a low rumble.

I reluctantly released his thumb. He was right: this was a dangerous game. One that was getting harder and harder for us to play.

I had a late start to the day the next morning. My heart was still aching over the loss of Iona and I had ended up sleeping well into the late morning as I gathered the strength to face the day. I had to fight the urge to lie in bed all day wrapped in my sadness. I knew that no matter how I felt, Iona would not have wanted me to wallow in the sorrow of missing her.

I forced myself to wash and dress for the day, then made my way to the library. I hoped that burying myself in a good book for a few hours would serve as a decent distraction until I felt ready to face the rest of the day.

It wasn't until I had the door to the library partially open that I realized the room was already occupied. Disappointed with the discovery, I began to close the door, not yet ready for company, but I paused when I heard  Mr. MacAlpin's voice raised in anger coming from inside.

"This is completely unacceptable, MacGregor, and we will no longer stand for it," Mr. MacAlpin said.

"I'm sorry ye feel that way, Mr. MacAlpin, truly I do, but my decision stands," said Alastair. His voice was firm, but he sounded weary, as if this were a conversation they'd had many times before.

"It will not stand," the magistrate insisted. "Ye have a duty to your people, sir. Do ye deny that?"

"No, Mr. MacAlpin, I do not. But I would hope that I had earned the trust of my people by now. I'd hoped that all of those who stand with ye on this would reconsider in time, in light of all I had done."

"Reconsider? When every day ye put the future of this entire clan at risk? No, MacGregor. If you continue to insist on marrying this woman, I warn ye, ye will have a war on your hands."

I heard shifting from inside the room and then Alastair's voice came, low and menacing. "Are ye threatening me, Mr. MacAlpin? Maybe ye think ye would be better suited as chief, aye?"

I heard Mr. MacAlpin swallow audibly and I almost felt sorry for the man.

"I have no intention of challenging ye for the position of chief, MacGregor, but I will not deny that there are those more than willing to step forward if you do not make the choice to do your duty by your people. I know you love Miss Gordon, but a union between the two of ye is impossible. It is time for her to leave. Ye must send her away."

"Mr. MacAlpin, you've made your position on the matter more than clear. Now let me try to make myself just as transparent. I love  Miss Gordon and I will not be sending her away, not now, or ever. Ye may be the magistrate but I am still chief of this clan until such a time as I die or someone challenges me for the position and wins. And I'll warn ye now, MacAlpin, if ye do find someone to challenge me, I have no intention of losing. I do not take kindly to your bringing such division to my people."

"Ye brought this division upon yourself the moment ye insisted on taking this woman as your own, MacGregor. Don't blame me for your ill judgment. Your stubborn love for this woman will tear our clan to pieces. And then what will ye do? Is she truly worth that? Is she worth the destruction of everything that we've worked so hard to build? Bodies in the streets, MacGregor! Bodies in the streets and the threat of war within the clan. Ye must do something to control this clan. Unless ye want to be known as the chief that let his clan fall to ruin while he buried his head in the sand and his cock in a—"

I jumped at the sound of Alastair's fist coming down hard on something.

"Finish that sentence, MacAlpin, and I'll be forced to remove your tongue from your throat," Alastair told him, his voice low and menacing.

"Yes, well." Mr. MacAlpin coughed, "I believe ye take my meaning."

"All too well," Alastair growled. "Now, MacAlpin, if ye dinna mind, I have many things to be seeing to. Ye know your way out."

"Mind my words, MacGregor, and do the right thing."

I had heard more than enough and closed the door as quietly as possible before hurrying away.

Every day that I stayed, I was driving a wedge into the middle of this clan. I loved Alastair with all my heart and I had believed that together we could overcome anything. But maybe we were simply fooling ourselves. Were we just being selfish by insisting on staying together? Could I honestly say that our happiness was more important than the stability of the entire clan? No, I couldn't. The honorable thing for me to do would be to leave, to simply make the choice for both of us and leave before this got any harder and the fighting got any worse. There was no other way.

***

I snuck a small bag of food upstairs from the kitchen and dumped it on the bed. I had to move quickly so as not to be discovered. It wasn't unusual for me to be seen carrying baskets around the castle when I was on my way into Fortingall, so no one would look too closely at my actions, but I did not want to push my luck, either. The faster I was packed and on the road away from the keep, the better for everyone.

I hurried to the wardrobe, pulled out my cloak and wrapped it around my shoulders. I didn't bother to pack an extra gown, as it would be a long ride back to the Gordon lands and I would need to travel lightly. I would have everything I needed when I was back on my father's land.

The chamber door opened behind me as I was fastening my cloak and I spun around to face a confused-looking Alastair.

His eyes roamed over me as he took in my traveling attire and spotted the saddlebag on the bed.

"Are ye going for a ride, love?" he asked.

"I... yes, I am," I stuttered. "I thought a bit of fresh air would do me some good today."

"Aye." He nodded slowly. His eyes narrowed as he examined my face and looked at the saddlebag again.

"Who's going with ye, then?" he asked.

"I... I thought to go by myself today. It's silly that I always have to inconvenience one of the men whenever I want to go riding."

"Ye know it's not safe for ye to be riding out there alone, Glenna, especially now. If ye insist on going for a ride right now, then I'll go with ye."

"But..."

The look he leveled at me just then silenced me in an instant and I simply nodded.

"Fetch your bag, then," he said quietly, then waited for me to walk ahead of him out the door.

The horses were saddled quickly and we were soon on the road, riding in silence away from the keep.

"Here," he said after a while. "Our lake isn't far from here. Why don't we stop there for a bit?"

"All right."

We directed our horses off the main road and into the trees. Before long we came to the edge of a deep blue body of water. Alastair had brought me to the lake for the first time when I had first arrived at the castle, leading me here in the middle of the night while in his wolf form. It was that night that everything had changed between us, though I hadn't known it then. My heart constricted at the memory and I had to fight back my tears.

After we'd dismounted we walked to the water's edge and looked out at the still depths. Alastair stood behind me on the bank but did not touch me. I was not stupid; I knew that something was wrong. He seemed distant from me and I worried that his fight with Mr. MacAlpin had taken its toll.

"Were ye even going to say goodbye?" he whispered.

The pain in his voice reached deep inside me and crushed my heart. I should have known that he would see straight through me. What had made me think that I could deceive him?

"I was going to write you a letter..." I said sadly.

"A letter," he repeated coolly. "I suppose that's better than nothing. At least ye were not going to disappear without a trace and leave me wondering. I should be grateful for that, aye?"

It sounded so insulting. A letter. After all that we had shared.

"I could never do that to you," I told him. I kept my back to him, still unable to turn around and face him.

"Oh, aye, of course," he scoffed. "But ye could sneak off and leave me like a thief in the night."

I closed my eyes and lowered my head. Every word was like another blow to my heart.

"I was trying to do what I thought was best," I said weakly.

"What ye thought was best?" he snarled.

I cried out as he grabbed me roughly by my arm and spun me around to face him. I flinched away from the look of pain in his beautiful green eyes. It killed me to know that I was the one who had put it there.

"How, Glenna?" he demanded. He took me by the shoulders and shook me until my teeth rattled. "How could ye think that that was what's best?"

"Stop, Alastair, stop!" I wrenched myself from his grip and stumbled away. I pressed a hand up against a tree to steady my balance as the tears began to flow. I wanted so badly to do the right thing, but seeing the pain that my leaving was causing him I was no longer certain what the right thing was.

"It's not fair," I yelled. Turning to him, I brushed roughly at my tears, determined to stay the course. "It's not fair what my being here is doing to everyone. If I go, it's over, it's done. I'm the problem, Alastair. Me. And if I go, things between you and your people will go back to the way they should be. My leaving will hurt for a while, I know, but you'll move on in time. Our hearts will heal."

"Ye think it will hurt for a while? Hurt for a while!" he roared. "You're tearing my heart out, Glenna, can't ye see that? And it'll not heal in time because there'll be nothing left of it! Did ye think ye could just go off and leave me with naught but a letter to soothe my wounds and think that I wouldn't hunt ye down and drag ye back to my side where ye belong? Do ye truly think that there is a world in which I would be willing to give ye up?"

He stormed toward me and pressed me back against the tree. His unleashed anger engulfed me and it felt as if the heat of it burned all the air out of the woods, I could barely breathe.

"I just want to do what's right, Alastair. We've been so selfish."

"I dinna care! Everything I have ever done, I have done for them. But not this time. This time I will keep what's mine."

He pulled me to him and kissed me, pouring all of his anger and frustration into our embrace. I struggled to find my footing. I felt as if I were drowning in his need.

His hands were everywhere, grabbing, squeezing and tugging at me, trying to take hold of as much of me as he could. He lifted the skirts of my gown to my waist, then, cupping me, he lifted me up and pressed me hard to the tree. My hair got caught on the rough bark and snagged painfully, but I did not care. I wrapped my legs around him for support and kissed him back just as madly. Any thoughts of leaving had been wiped completely from my mind.

He was right, of course. How could I have ever thought that I would be able to walk away from him?

"You'll not be leaving again, ye hear me?" he growled into my ear.

I nodded, panting, as I tried to catch my breath.

"Say it," he demanded.

"I'll not leave again," I promised.

"Say it again."

"I swear I'll not leave you again."

He captured my mouth again but this time more gently, his early fury slowly abating as he set me back on the ground. I clung to him, not yet ready for us to be parted. I needed to keep touching him. I had been so close to losing him. So close to walking away. And it would have been the worst mistake I had ever made.

"Ye must stop scaring me like this, Glenna," he said gently as he stroked my cheek.

"I'm sorry," I told him with a smile. "I'll not do it again."

"Will ye come home with me now?"

"Aye," I nodded. "I'd like that very much."

As I climbed back up into the saddle and settled myself I looked over at him as he mounted his horse.

"How did you know?" I asked him.

"That ye were leaving? I didn't at first," he said. "I knew ye were at the door when MacAlpin was there, love. I knew ye had heard what he said and I wanted to come check on ye to make sure ye were all right."

"You knew I was there?"

"Aye. I know the smell of ye, Glenna. I'll always know when you're around. I'll always find ye, love, and I'll always protect ye. I promise ye that. Now, let's go home."