Taking Chances: A Donnelley Brother's Novel (17 page)

“Take off the dress and turn around, Hadley.” Collin commanded.

I huffed my irritation audibly as I shrugged from the ripped material. It fell to the floor around my feet and I glared up at the scowling man. “You can say please.” I didn’t wait for his smart remark as I turned my back to him.

His sharp gasp filled the charged air and I felt the hairs on my body rise. “Awe damn, baby, this is bad.”

“What?” I felt something that resembled fear sound in the undercurrents of my tone. Shifting my body in front of the mirror, I tilted my head to look at my back. And I gasped.

My skin was a deep, punishing red. In some places, like my shoulder blades and the small of my back, the skin was already peeling. Ignoring the pain, I reached back for the string of my bathing suit and hissed in deep when my skin stretched.

Collin stopped me. “I got it, baby.” He cooed gently.

Lifting the string, he moved it soothingly to the side to show me the difference in skin color from the skin exposed to the sun and the skin that had been protected. It was bad.

Feeling tears moisten in my eyes I sucked in a deep breath. “Thanks. You can put it back.”

“You’re staying the night here.”

“No I’m not.” I shook my head determinedly, but I could already feel the fight waning. I was tired, sore, and irritated with myself for my inexcusable stupidity.

“Hadley.” Collin’s tone dared me to argue. “You’re staying the night.”

Chapter 14

For long moments, I did nothing other than stare up at Collin. He’d laid it down for me, and I knew that if I fought him to return home, it would be a useless waste of time. So I didn’t fight.

Instead, I announced the only thing I could think to say. “I have no clothes.”

“You have a bathing suit.”

“I went swimming in the lake.” I whispered, feeling my emotions heighten to a point of hysteria. Outside, I knew I appeared still and calm, but inside I was a hurricane mess. “I can’t wear this all night.”

Collin gritted his teeth before nodding. “Alright, if you went swimming then you need a shower.” He held his hand out to me. “Come with me.”

I followed Collin and the Aloe Vera from the room, through the house, to a set of wide stairs. Then, I followed him upstairs, past a small sitting area, two more bedrooms and a bathroom, to the last bedroom in the house that I just knew, by instinct, belonged to the man himself.

My breath caught as he led me into the bedroom.

It was all Collin.

Dark shades of brown with pops of navy covered the room and I recognized the design of his furniture as his own. I don’t know what it was about knowing he built his own furniture that made my heart feel all girly, but it did. I liked knowing he was good with his hands, and used that talent to create a more homey space for himself. The woman who finally caught this mans heart would be a lucky woman to share everything he’d built with him. Suddenly, I felt a little heavyhearted.

The thought of Collin with another woman actually hurt me.

Physically.

I was short of breath.

“This way, baby.” Collin’s voice interrupted my very unwelcomed thoughts and I followed him into a large bathroom.

There was a massive jet tub that, right now, looked like a little slice of heaven. My little cabin didn’t have a tub like this and I had been desperately missing the one I’d had at home in Toronto. To sink down in warm water, feeling it sooth my raw skin, would be heaven on earth right now.

“You can have a shower, or a bath, whichever you prefer.” He shrugged. “I’m going to run to your cabin and pick up some clothing for you.”

“Wait?” I felt momentarily stunned. “What?”

“Hadley, you just said you needed clothes.”

“But I don’t want you going through my things.” I protested, although I really had nothing to hide.

His eyes narrowed. “Well, you’re not leaving here tonight, so you can’t go get your clothes. You can wear nothing all night, that’s fine by me.” He smirked. “Or I can go and get you some clothes.”

Feeling a glare set in, I mumbled. “You can go.”

“I’ll admit I’m disappointed.” He winked and my traitorous heart fluttered. “I was hoping you’d agree to go naked.”

“Will you grow up?” I demanded. “Like, ever?”

He smirked. “Probably not.”

“I’d like to have a shower and since you’re holding me hostage here, I’m going to ask you to leave so I can do that. Alone.”

He laughed. “I’ll be back soon.”

“I’m sure you will.” I muttered, following him to the door.

After shutting the door on his laughter, I made a point of locking it before I moved back to the vanity mirror. Spinning around, I reached behind me with a sharp breath for the string dangling down my spine. Tugging on it, the bathing suit came undone and I quickly pulled it off.

After staring longingly at the bathtub, I decided to take a shower. Collin would be back soon from my cabin and when I allowed myself to have a bath it would be a nice, relaxing, long bath.

Sighing heavily, I padded across the floor to the shower. Pulling open the glass door, I stepped into the warm brown tile with the chocolate veins and turned on the water. When the water was flowing a stream of steady warmth, I stepped into the fall and clenched my teeth against the sting. When my tender skin was finally used to the feel of water pebbling over the expanse, I went about cleaning myself.

Everything Collin had in his shower was for men. After a moment of frowning at the thought of smelling like a walking spice, I shrugged and picked up his shampoo. When I was done washing my body and hair, I stood in the water for a few extra minutes before I turned off the stream, wrapped myself in the only towel I saw hanging on a rack, and stood in front of the mirror.

After a few minutes of simply staring at myself in the mirror, I jumped at a knock on the door. “Hadley, you alright in there?”

“Yes.” I called softly through the heavy wood of the door.

“You coming out soon, or did you want me to come in?”

“Um...” my voice was resuming its shaking. I was naked and Collin wanted to be welcomed into the room. I didn’t quite know how I felt about this. “I don’t know.”

“Baby.” I heard a small thump on the door. “Open the door for me.”

My heart raced as I moved across the bathroom to the door. Pulling a deep breath into my constricted lungs, I unlocked it. Collin didn’t wait for me to open the door. As soon as he heard the latch of the lock, he’d pushed the door open wide. For what felt like the billionth time tonight, my heart raced painfully against the cage of my chest.

“Collin.” I whispered his name and his eyes landed on my face. “I don’t...” I paused and he waited patiently. For the first time, there were no smart remarks or teasing jabs. Instead, there was only gentle patience in his emerald eyes. For some reason, that made this harder for me. “I’m not - I’ve never...”

“What’s wrong, beautiful?”

“I have no clothes on under the towel.”

He smiled gently. It wasn’t the lady-killer grin. It was just a smile that was gentle and calming and beautiful. “I’ve seen it all before, beautiful. You’ve got nothing to be embarrassed about.”

My heart fisted in my chest. “You haven’t seen
me
.”

Slowly, he nodded. “You’re right, baby.”

“Hadley.” I said my name harshly. “My name is Hadley.”

Alright, so admittedly, I was pissy that he’d brought up other women at a time when I was supposed to just drop my towel and let him lather me in Aloe Vera. He may have thought his words would calm my raging discomfort, but he was so very wrong. Knowing he could even think about another woman while I was considering dropping my towel was just hurtful.

Here I was crushing on him - or I thought I was crushing on him - because nothing else made sense - and he was talking about other women. Other
naked
women. It didn’t get much worse than that.

Watching his face tense, I felt my breath catch. “I know your name.” He said sternly. “I know more about you than I’ve ever known about any woman,
Hadley
. Now, are you going to drop your towel so I can help your burn from progressing, or are we going to stand here and argue about the inevitable.”

I didn’t know what to feel about his words. They were heart fluttering and heart stopping. He knew more about me than he’d ever known about any woman. I liked that. But I still didn’t know what it meant. And it didn’t stop the fact that I was nervous and uncomfortable with the thought of dropping my towel for this man who was slowly, ever so slowly, weaving his web around my heart.

“I can’t.” I dropped my eyes to the floor and my hands, that were clutching the towel against my chest, began to tremble. “I can’t be naked in front of you.”

“Then hold the towel to your chest, Hadley, but show me your back.”

“But, my butt.” I felt tears prick my eyes and I blinked rapidly to keep them from falling.

Collin caught sight of my moist eyes and hissed in a deep breath. “What is this about, Hadley? Why are you so uncomfortable with being naked? You’re beautiful. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

My voice shook. “I’m not embarrassed.” Even as I said the words, my skin burned red. “I’ve just - I don’t just take my clothes off for people.”

After a few breaths of uncomfortable, stifling silence passed, I peaked up at Collin. He was stiff. His face was tense and his eyes were on me, unmoving. Deep breaths were making his chest rise and fall and his mouth was positioned in a thin line on his face that wasn’t quite a frown, but it definitely wasn’t a smile.

“Happy to hear that, baby.” He said gruffly. “But I’m not just anyone.”

“No.” I replied softly, feeling embarrassed now. “You’re my friend. You don’t get to see me naked.”

“But...” he stuttered. Yes, the man who always had something to say stuttered. “But you’ve had boyfriends see you naked?” I watched his big hands curl into fists. “The guy you’re with in the picture over the fireplace in your cabin?”

“Try brother.” I whispered and his face tensed with understanding. “Not boyfriend.”

“The brother?” His question was hoarse. I knew what he was asking, but understanding didn’t make it any easier to reply.

“Yes.” I only needed to nod once for him to understand. We hadn’t talked about Michael. Apart from Collin telling me that he was here and that he would listen, I hadn’t conversed with Collin about my brother. All Collin knew was that I’d had a brother, and he’d died recently.

“Shit, baby.” He ran a hand through his already disheveled hair. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” I smiled through my pain before asking. “You didn’t see the resemblances in the photos?”

A far away look claimed his eyes and I knew he was thinking back to the pictures sitting on the fireplace mantle in my cabin. “Yeah, I suppose now that I know, there are resemblances.”

Silence pulsed awkwardly between us as Collin shifted on the spot and I clutched tighter at my towel.

Then he spoke. “So, boyfriends.” His voice shook and I felt my eyes study him harder. “You didn’t leave one at home?”

Had he seriously been wondering this for the nine weeks we’d been hanging out, and was only just asking now?

I frowned at the contrast between the dark curiosity in his eyes and the forced ease in his tone before I replied. “Nope.”

“So evasive.” His grin turned into the familiar lady-killer grin I was so used to. But this time, I saw that grin for what it was - a defense mechanism. “I think you’re hiding something from me.”

“I’m not.”

“I think you are.” He stated simply.

“I assure you, I’m not.” I tried to remain steady. “I only ever bothered with dating once. I was sixteen and he was cute. We went out once. But Mike saw him kiss me at the end of the night - my first kiss - and that was the end of it.” I smiled at the memory. “Mike threatened him, like big brothers do, and we never went out again.” I shrugged. “I decided not to bother with dating until I was older, and I haven’t.”

I shrugged again at the utter shock radiating from his every pore as he stared down at me.

“You’ve never...” he stuttered, rubbing his fingertips over the light shadowing of stubble on his chin. “You’ve never dated?”

“Apart from the one time, no.” I stated when his shock failed to subside. “There was no point in dating - not really, anyway. I wasn’t ready for anything serious and I’ve always wanted my first to be my only, you know?”

He looked pale. “Holy fuck.” He scrubbed his hands over his face violently. “You’re a...”

Oh, I get it. He wasn’t freaking out over my lack of boyfriends - he was freaking out over the fact that I was a specimen he believed no longer existed. My lack of sexual experience surely freaked this experienced man right out of his mind.

I stated firmly. “I’m a virgin? Yeah, I am.” He blinked and I added. “Go on, say it. Virgin. It’s not a bad word.”

He scowled. “I know it’s not a bad word, but shit, Hadley.”

“What?” I snapped. “Why do you keep swearing?”

“I...” he stuttered again. “You just surprised me is all.”

“I’ll say.” I tried to steady my nervously shaking hands before replying defensively. “You know virgins aren’t rare. There are a lot of women who choose not to throw it away to someone who doesn’t deserve it.”

“I’ve never met one.”

“That’s probably not accurate.” I replied matter of fact. “You probably just haven’t met a girl who thought you deserved something so preciously important to her.”

His eyes darkened and his shoulders stiffened as he stared down at me. My heart thudded. “You’re probably right.”

I’ve never, in my entire life, wished I could take back the words I’d spoken.

Chapter 15

“If you’ll excuse me a moment, I’ll put some panties on and then you can lather me with all the Aloe Vera you want.” I tried to keep my voice steady, but the guarded look in his emerald eyes made me want to cry.

All I really wanted to do was show him that there was a woman who believed he was worth giving something so cherished too, because honestly, I would give him that part of me. There was no doubt, that if he wanted it, I would give it to him. I didn’t really care about the possibility of hurt any longer - not the way I had always feared that kind of pain, anyway. Instead, I cared more about the man I’d hurt - the man who possessed the capacity to destroy my heart.