Talania - a Trip Down Memory Lane... (21 page)

“Yes, really. Baby, I told you. You really haven’t changed.”

“Well, I’ll come up with something, or I’ll be damned!”

“I know you will,” he chuckles.

Dr. Zelanburg’s knock at the door startles us from our silly conversation. “Evelyn, are you ready to start chemotherapy?” Knowing this was coming, I realize that Tristan and I have been avoiding any talk about my chemo. I turn to Tristan with questioning eye and he reluctantly nods.

“Yeah, we’re ready. Tristan is going with me. Is that okay?”

My doctor opens the door and smiles. “Of course it is dear. It will be good for you to have someone else besides your parents with you for once.”

I love my doctor. He gets me; he loves me. “You know me so well,” I tease him.

He grins. “I would hope so after treating you for four years, my dear.”

No matter how many times I’ve forgotten Dr. Zelanburg, he always manages to win me back over to his side. I’m sure my memory loss broke his heart more than a few times.

Because I am still weak from the fever, Tristan pushes me in the wheelchair behind Dr. Zelanburg all the way to the chemo room. I am going straight to my first round of chemo because I have aggressive, adamant doctors. I know I will be leaving in a wheelchair too.

Because Dr. Zelanburg knows me so well, he has my wheelchair all prepped and ready for me. “You even got me a Cosmo,” I whisper.

“Of course I did. What kind of oncologist forgets Cosmo?” he teases, making light of our many trips down the hall to the chemo room.

I can’t remember a lot of them up until the last half of this year when my memory stopped being affected.

“I used my phone to look up information on her port. Are you sure it’s safe to use it the same day it’s reinstalled for her first treatment?”

I look up at Tristan, shocked that he is actually doing his homework.

I see the smile spread on Dr. Zelanburg’s face. “Have a seat son. Let me get our girl hooked up and I’ll explain Evelyn’s case to you.”

Tristan seems content with that answer and takes a seat next to me.

“I’m special, I guess, because Dr. Zelanburg always wants to start my treatments unless he’s busy elsewhere. For the most part that I can remember, he’s always here with me in the beginning of the session.”

Tristan eyes go wide as he watches my doctor run the catheter into my port. I can’t help but just smile at him. This is the easy part. He has no idea of what is coming.

Dr. Z waits a few moments after inserting the catheter. He does the routine procedures of checking my machine and port-a-cath, and then he begins my session. He drags a rolling chair to sit in front of Tristan and me. “All right Tristan, are you ready for a quick and easy version of why our Evelyn is so special?”

Tristan nods eagerly. I guess the more he knows the better it will make him feel.

“It depends on each individual case as to when an oncologist will decide it is safe to start using a port. Evelyn had hers installed early this morning while you were still asleep. She then went back to sleep for almost six hours. This helped me determine the time frame for when to start her chemo today. I despise saying this, but our dear Evelyn’s body is still used to this sort of treatment.

“She is strong, and with Acute Leukemia, it’s best to start treatment right away, but most especially in Evelyn’s case. All cases of cancer are unique in their own way. Many different specifications help determine treatments for our patients. We want our Evelyn cancer free again as quick as possible. We know she is strong and can handle it. Do you have any questions for me Tristan, or did I answer them for you?”

Tristan sits back and thinks for a minute. “Yes,” he says, “what are the drugs you’re going to be pumping into my girlfriend?”

“Well, first I will inject saline to keep her hydrated and to keep her kidneys functioning properly. The next injection is known as EP. This is a combination of two drugs: etoposide and cisplatin, which contains platinum. After EP, the chemotherapy fluids will start. When we finish the chemotherapy fluids, I will give her more saline. If at any time Evelyn starts to feel nauseous, she will be given an anti-emetic drug thru her port. You may also hear her port referred to as a central line. They are the same thing. Each round of chemo will take between six to eight hours, from start to finish. I know it is a lot to take in on such notice, but you will quickly become familiar with the routine.”

Tristan looks lost as he sits and listens to Dr. Z. He seems to grow paler with the mention of every new drug.

“I’m not worried about the time Doc. That’s just an awful lot of drugs to be shoving into her body.” He frowns and grabs my hand.

Doctor Z. nods his head in agreement. “Yes, it is Tristan, but this is the only way. Cancer is very dangerous and very tricky. It can be so resistant to treatment that you will want to yell at the top of your lungs or bang your head into a wall. It is best to start treatment quickly and aggressively. The quicker we treat Evelyn, the better her chances for a full recovery.”

Tristan seems all right with this answer and so he asks another. “What should I expect after her first session and those that follow?”

Again, my doctor is pleased that Tristan is asking reasonable questions.

“Very good question Tristan,” he says as he grins. “After this first treatment she will be very tired and probably nauseated. This will worsen and her body will weaken as it fights off the cancer. Each treatment will leave her weaker than the last. Normally, when treatments aren’t so aggressive, these symptoms would lessen, but we are starting her treatments full force. We are not taking any chances, not giving her any time to rest in between sessions, but this is because we want fast results. She wasn’t in remission very long. I am not going to beat around the bush and lie to you. It’s not a good sign that she has relapsed so quickly.”

Tristan goes completely still and sucks in a breath. I need to ease his mind a little, so I tease him. “You’re not getting rid of me so fast. I’m strong enough to fight this.”

“Yes, you are,” Dr. Zelanburg agrees.

“What about radiation treatment?” It seems that Tristan has a lot of questions fighting to get out of his head.

“I think you should keep this one around Evelyn,” Dr. Zelanburg jokes. “We have Evelyn on a very strict schedule. She will receive one week of chemo. Then she will only rest for two and half weeks before her next round is due. If chemotherapy is not having the effect we want, we will move onto doing both chemo and radiation at the same time. Her cancer is just too aggressive for just radiation at this time, so we are starting with the chemotherapy. We would really like to avoid radiation all together. Did I answer your questions?”

“No, well yes, but I have one more. Why are you trying to stay away from radiation completely?”

“You’re very smart Tristan. Evelyn still might have some fertile eggs that survived her previous treatments. We can’t be sure and there is no time to do tests to find out. The less we do the better chance she has at a miracle pregnancy.”

“Dr. Zelanburg doesn’t mess around. He will not lie and promise me babies. Did you notice how he said miracle pregnancy? He just wants that chance for a miracle to occur. The less my body goes through now, the greater chance for a miracle later.” I grin at Tristan.

Tristan grows quiet for a few moments as he thinks about what Doctor Zelanburg just said. “Remember, I told you adoption is an option when we’re ready,” he says as he smiles.

My heart pitter-patters with his repeated assurance. God, I love this man!

“You keep this one for good, you hear me dear?”

I nod at my doctor, grinning like a person who won ‘the hot guy with a heart’ lottery. Yes, I totally won that one!

“I promise,” I whisper.

“Evelyn, are you okay if I leave you alone with Tristan?”

I look from Tristan and back to my doctor.

“Go call the wife and those beautiful grandbabies I know she’s spoiling.”

He stands up, rolling the wheelchair back to the counter.

“You call my cell if you need me. Don’t hesitate little Beaumont.”

“Yes sir,” I salute with Tristan's hand still laced with mine.

Evelyn is now on her ninth treatment and she just keeps getting weaker and weaker. Never in my life did I suspect how hard this would be. I am not talking about taking care of her. I am talking about watching the love of my life, suffering day in and day out and there is not one damn thing I can do about it.

Her hair has already started falling out and she has lost so much weight I can carry her with one arm. Her small fragile body weighs nothing. Her eyes are sunken in her face and her hair is so thin I am afraid to touch it. She has been in the bathroom just standing at the sink for over an hour, leaning on the granite counter top for support. Her weak body is slowly wobbling back and forth.

“Evelyn.” I knock on the door, trying to give her some privacy. I hear her sniffling, so I open the door the rest of the way. “What’s wrong baby?” I think I know what the problem is. I just want to make sure I am right.

She holds out her hand full of hair. “It’s time Tristan,” she sniffles. She is talking about shaving her head.

“Okay, but I have to make a few calls baby, so don’t start without me.”

Evelyn has no idea what the group has planned for this exact moment.

“I promise,” she whispers.

I walk into the spare bedroom so she can’t overhear my phone conversation. I quickly dial Drake’s number.

“Yo bro, what’s up?”

“It’s time Drake,” I mumble quietly into the phone.

His sigh is so deep; I swear I can feel it. “We’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

“Yeah.” I hang up. My next call is to my parents who have been staying in a rental house down the road.