Tales from the Captain’s Table (4 page)

“Captain!” shouted a voice from almost directly overhead. “A ship! Heading right for us!”

Everyone who stood on the pirate ship’s gently swaying deck or crawled in its rigging, perhaps two dozen nasty pieces of work in all, turned toward where the man in the crow’s nest pointed.

Approaching far more quickly than should have been possible for a wooden sailing ship, especially on such a calm day, was a three-masted wooden frigate, her turquoise-skinned Pelagian crew visibly busy on the top deck positioning and loading cannons. Hoisted over the mainsail was a skull-headed banner, which I took to be the local equivalent of the Jolly Roger.

As the frigate heaved to, I began to make out some of her markings. I was surprised to see that they weren’t written in Pelagian. They were in English.

The ship alongside us was the
Enterprise.

“Forgive my interruption, Riker, but I believe you told us that the
Enterprise
was in drydock, light-years away from Pelagia.”

Before Riker could answer, he saw a look of sudden comprehension dawning on Picard’s face. “Of course. The holodeck program I’d saved from the
Enterprise
-D
.
It was on the
Calypso II
’s computer.”

Riker nodded, grinning. “I guessed that was the work of Commander Keru, the
Enterprise
’s former stellar cartographer. He had more experience with holographic imaging than anyone else who’d come with us to Pelagia. He also had spent a fair amount of time during his two tours of duty on the
Enterprise
running pirate holodeck scenarios. I learned later that once Deanna had discovered I was missing, she rounded up the troops and ordered Keru to outfit the
Calypso II
’s hull with dozens of small holoemitters. Keru found the wooden frigate simulation program in the yacht’s memory banks, and used it as a rough-and-ready disguise.”

“I’m impressed,” Klag said. “Not at the holographic trickery—any fool of an engineer could do that—no, I am taken with such blatant violation of Pelagian law.”

Riker glanced at Picard. His silent stare felt like an accusation.

Then Riker looked into his glass. “Exigent circumstances.”

“Or barroom blarney?” offered Cap, evidently trying to be helpful.

“If you prefer to think so,” Riker said, content to let the others form their own opinions about that. “But regardless, violations like this one are far more serious if one gets caught.”

Klag chortled. “True.”

Picard’s hard stare softened into a grin. “Anyhow…?”

“Anyhow,” Riker said, and continued.

The other ship very quickly drew to within grappling distance, as though propelled by supernatural forces.

And she was, at least from the perspective of the locals. Canvas sails were no match for the maneuvering thrusters of a
Sovereign
-class starship’s captain’s yacht. As I watched the large, mustachioed Pelagian freebooter who stood on the deck of the wooden
Enterprise,
twirling a grappling line over his head—I recognized him only then as our Trill security officer Ranul Keru—I hoped that Deanna and the rest of my rescuers were using whatever energy was necessary to keep their power usage shielded from the monitoring stations on the main southern islands.

They’ve got to be doing that,
I realized. After all, they might simply have flown into orbit and beamed me directly to safety. But had they done that, the Pelagian authorities would have detected it—and the Federation would have suddenly found itself embroiled in an embarrassing diplomatic incident.

I also realized that the yacht’s crew probably couldn’t use the transporter even if they had wanted to; using their shields to avoid detection by the authorities would have used far too much power for that to be possible.

So we’re reduced to an old-fashioned battle on the high seas
, I thought just before Captain Torr’ghaff surprised me by slicing the ropes that had bound my wrists behind me.

“Why?” I asked.

“No one should die like a helpless feedbeast bound for the spit, heh. Should we challenge the woman who boards us now, that is your likely fate, heh.”

“Have you not seen the flag that flies over her mast, Urr’hilf?” shouted one of the other pirates, a scruffy, dark-skinned man. “We are being boarded by Arr’ghenn, the Pirate Queen, heh. Have you not seen her on the deck, eha?”

I looked again. Standing beside Keru, dressed in pirate finery that could only be described as regal—in an outlaw sort of way—stood my turquoise-skinned bride. A handful of other pirates stood nearby, cutlasses and pistols at the ready, resembling a potentate’s honor guard more than a band of merry cutthroats.

Thank God somebody, probably Keru,
I thought,
seems to be on top of the local pirate legends.

Now Klag threw his head back and laughed. “Your Betazoid mate,” Klag said. “A pirate chieftainess?”

“That’s right. Would I lie to you?”

Klag shrugged. “While telling a story, Riker, I would be disappointed if you didn’t. Continue.”

As the
Enterprise
moved in alongside Captain Torr’ghaff’s ship, I was glad to see that the
Calypso II
’s newly installed holoemitters were working flawlessly. Torr’ghaff’s men edged toward the banisters, cutlasses and other weapons at the ready, but I was heartened to see that Deanna and her crew were standing fast, with none of their own weaponry brandished.

That didn’t make Keru and the others any less imposing, however. Keru was stripped to the waist and looking every bit as hirsute and tall as Torr’ghaff, though he was considerably more muscular. He stood in front of Deanna, and as they neared, shouted over to the pirate ship.

“The Queen of the Nine Seas, Arr’ghenn, greets you and wishes to declare
amicry
for the evening.”

For some reason, my universal translator failed to tell me what “
amicry
” was, so I asked the pirate next to me.

“It’s a truce, neh,” the grizzled old man hissed through rotten greenish teeth. “What, you just fall out of the sky, eh?”

“She only has a small crew,” another pirate said to Torr’ghaff under his breath. “We can take her ship and her crew before night falls, heh.”

Torr’ghaff seemed to consider his options for the moment, then turned to the man who had just advised him. “We don’t strike now, Tarrniq, heh. Not until we know what armaments or crew she has in the hold of her strange ship.”

I stepped forward. “Smart thinking, Captain. I’ve heard many a tale about the might of Arr’ghenn, the Pirate Queen. Her legend could not have grown so large if she were not a tremendous force to be reckoned with.”

Torr’ghaff turned toward me, and I wondered if my comment was too impertinent. “She is a woman, Urr’hilf, and thus always a force, heh. But I have conquered many forces in my life, though few as succulent as she, heh heh.” He leered toward her, and I had to restrain myself from grabbing him by the throat. The presence of so many weapon-wielding brigands encouraged me not to lose my cool.

After a few minutes of negotiations, yelled across the narrow stretch of water that now separated the two ships, Deanna, Keru, and a trio of other Pelagian-disguised Starfleet officers—I recognized Chief Tongetti and Lieutenants Narin and Cruzen, in spite of their temporary cosmetic alterations—came aboard Torr’ghaff’s vessel. Now that we seemed to be in no immediate mortal danger, I found myself being re-tied by my captors. Green Teeth assured me it was necessary, “for my own safety.”

“And who is your captive?” Deanna asked imperiously as she strode across the deck toward us.

Torr’ghaff seemed surprised by her question. “You do not recognize Fegrr’ep Urr’hilf, neh?” His eyes narrowed dangerously. “He is only the greatest
klap’pa
musician on all of Pelagia! How can you not know him, heh?””

“Oh,
him
,” Deanna said, her voice dripping with disdain as she looked at me. “We don’t
allow
his music on my ship. It upsets my stomach.”

This seemed to mollify Torr’ghaff somewhat. “Then we shall not have him play tonight at dinner, neh. You will join us, heh?”

Deanna was about to respond to his sleazily suggestive invitation when the crewman stationed up in the crow’s nest called out yet again.

“Ship ahoy, twenty
mowhp
s
!”

“I assume this other ship was sent by the local authorities, alerted by your wife?” This time the interruption came from a Rigelian captain, who had scooted his barstool closer to where Riker, Picard, and Klag sat at the bar.

Riker sighed, and took another quaff from his tankard. “No, it was a merchant vessel.”

The Rigelian frowned. “So, if they weren’t calling for the authorities, then why this elaborate charade if they weren’t going to at least try to rescue you?”

“I suspect it all leads back to the technological restrictions,” Picard said dryly.

Riker pointed at his ex-CO. “Exactly. My shipmates had to figure out how to rescue me more covertly, without violating the restrictions, and without calling undue attention to the
Enterprise.
After all, even with all the holoemitters Keru had stuck on her hull, the
Calypso II
’s disguise still wasn’t perfect. She looked like a wooden sailing ship from ancient Earth, which meant that she didn’t look quite the same as a vessel built on Pelagia. Once they saw me in the custody of the pirates, they must have figured out that getting me free without a fight would take some finessing.”

“ ‘Without a fight’?” Klag slammed down another
warnog
. “How disappointing.”

“I’m getting to that,” Riker said.

One of Torr’ghaff’s men looked through a spyglass, then turned back to us with an excited grin. “It’s a
neropses
carrier, Captain, heh! From how low she’s riding in the water, I’d say her holds are full, heh!”

Playing her role of Arr’ghenn to the hilt, Deanna snatched a spyglass from another of Torr’ghaff’s men. She studied the horizon for a moment, then passed the tube to Keru.

“
Neropses?
Are you that desperate for booty that not only would you kidnap a puerile musician, but also plunder a ship full of
grain?”
She put her hands on her hips, and I could tell she was relishing her part.

Torr’ghaff seemed to grind his teeth for a moment. He looked back toward some of his men before replying. I suspected that he truly didn’t want to appear desperate in front of such an august outlaw personage as Arr’ghenn. “Of course not, Arr’ghenn, heh. We needn’t worry about such ships when we have riches of our own piled high, heh.” He gestured toward me. “As for this one, it happens that not only is his safe return worth a tidy sum, but his talent is also appreciated by my crew, heh, as well as by other freebooters far and wide.”

Deanna flashed a smile. “As long as he doesn’t perform during dinner, I don’t care. While I think it might be amusing to dine with him, if he sings so much as a note, I’ll cut his tongue out for dessert.”

I didn’t realize it at the time, but Deanna had just made a mistake in her role-playing by mentioning me singing. Torr’ghaff and his men already appeared to be suspicious about Arr’ghenn and her crew aboard the
Enterprise,
but her complete lack of knowledge about me—or Fegrr’ep Urr’hilf, to be more precise—clearly sent up a warning flag for the pirate captain.

Nevertheless, a few hours later, Arr’ghenn and her “adjutant” Keru had joined Torr’ghaff for a meal aboard his ship. Along with several of Torr’ghaff’s crew, we ate in a garishly appointed stateroom, seated around a wooden table that might once have been exquisite, but which now had so many nicks, scratches, and knife carvings in its surface that it was as rough as a cobblestone street.

Thankfully, I’ve eaten my share of both Earth seafood and Klingon fare, as have Deanna and Keru, so the “delicacies” placed on our plates didn’t churn our stomachs—at least not
too
much. The captain’s boy also served us a pungent but apparently
de rigueur
Pelagian liquor that it seemed unwise to try to refuse, however politely. For a time, the evening was almost enjoyable. Deanna managed to deflect questions about Arr’ghenn’s exploits in favor of questioning Torr’ghaff about his
own
past glories. When pressed to speak about herself, she demurred to Keru. I assume that in the time since they’d first encountered Torr’ghaff, Keru had been researching the legend of the reputed pirate queen whom Deanna was impersonating.

I stayed mostly silent, aware that I knew so little about the music or life of Fegrr’ep Urr’hilf that anything I said could reveal that I was not who they thought I was. I also kept my glances at Deanna and Keru to a minimum, lest any of the pirates recognize that I already knew them both.