Tales of the Dying Earth (99 page)

"Should not truth be known? Did you not ask yourself who in fact had beaten the beast, and why he identified himself as 'Rhialto'?"

Ildefonse cleared his throat. "Under the circumstances, as I have explained them, such questions are nuncupatory."

Rhialto consulted the torn copy of the Blue Principles. "Paragraph K of Section 2 would seem to describe your act as 'enhanced dereliction.' A harsh penalty—possibly too harsh—is specified, but the Adjudicator will read justice as it is written and apply the strictures to calm and thorough effect."

Ildefonse held up his hands. "Will you take so trivial an affair to Fader's Waft? The consequences are beyond calculation!"

"I will cite a third offense. In the looting of Falu, my copy of the Blue Principles was seized, torn and hurled to the ground. In this deed, which is precisely proscribed under Paragraph A: 'Treasonable Acts,' all conspirators share the guilt, and all must pay the penalty. This is far from a 'trivial affair'! I thought that you might share my indignation, and work for restitution and punishment of the guilty, but—"

"Your hopes have been validated!" cried Ildefonse. "I was on the verge of convoking a new conclave, to review the findings of the last session, which now seem to have been guided by emotion. Have patience! The Adjudicator need not be distracted from his passivity."

"Convene the conclave as of this instant! Declare at the outset that I am innocent of all charges, that I have suffered inexcusable wrongs, that I demand not only restitution but multiple damages—"

Ildefonse cried out in shock. "That is an irrational penalty!"

Rhialto said stonily: "As Preceptor this is your decision to make. Otherwise the Adjudicator must assess the penalties."

Ildefonse sighed. "I will call the conclave."

"Announce that only two issues will be considered: first, restitution and the imposition of fines, ranging from three-fold to five-fold, and I will hear neither bluster nor obfuscation; and secondly, identification of the malefactor."

Ildefonse grumbled something under his breath, but Rhialto paid no heed. "Convone the conclave! Accept no excuses! All must be present, as I am an exasperated man!"

Ildefonse put on an air of forlorn good cheer. "All may yet be well. First I will communicate with your only true ally, other than myself."

"You refer to whom?"

"Hache-Moncour, naturally! We will take his advice at once."

Ildefonse went to a table, where he placed the semblance of Hache-Moncour's face over a pair of orifices shaped to represent an ear and a mouth. "Hache-Moncour, Ildefonse speaks into your ear! I bring significant news! Speak with your mouth!"

"Ildefonse, I speak! What is your news?"

"Rhialto the Marvellous has come to Boumergarth! His mood is one of doubt and malaise. He feels that the conclave made several legalistic mistakes which tend to vitiate its findings; indeed, he demands triple damages from all parties concerned. Otherwise he threatens to take his case to the Adjudicator."

"A great mistake," said the mouth. "An act of reckless despair."

"So I have advised him, but Rhialto is an obstinate man."

The mouth spoke: "Can you not reason with him? Is he quite inflexible?"

"He yields by not so much as the twitch of an eyelash, and only speaks in tedious repetition of the Monstrament and the imposition of penalties. He seems obsessively convinced that a malefactor—"

 

Rhialto called out: "Speak more tersely, if you will; my time is valuable! Merely convene the conclave; you need not describe my troubled spirit in such sardonic detail."

Ildefonse angrily threw nineteen semblances down upon his communication device. He put a clamp upon the mouth to impede protests and questions, then, speaking out into nineteen ears at once, he ordered an immediate conclave at Boumergarth.

The magicians one by one took their places in the Grand Saloon. Hache-Moncour was the last to arrive. Before seating himself he spoke a few quiet words to Herark the Harbinger, with whom he was on good terms.

Rhialto, leaning against a wood-paneled wall to the side, somberly watched the arrival of his erstwhile colleagues. None save Hache-Moncour, who gave him a polite bow, so much as looked in his direction.

Ildefonse convened the meeting in his usual manner, then glanced sidelong toward Rhialto, who maintained his silence. Ildefonse coughed and cleared his throat. "I will come directly to the point. Rhialto claims an unjust confiscation of his property. He demands restitution and punitive damages; failing satisfaction, he states that he will take his case to the Adjudicator. There, in a nut-shell, is the gist of our business today."

Gilgad sprang to his feet, face purple with rage. ' 'Rhialto's posture is grotesque! How can he deny his crime? He beat poor Boodis and tethered him among nettles: a vile and heartless act! I declared as much before; I do so now, and will never revoke the charge!"

"I did not beat your beast," said Rhialto.

"Ha ha! Easy for you to say! Can you prove as much?"

"Certainly. I was walking with Ildefonse beside the River Scaum at the time of the incident."

Gilgad whirled upon Ildefonse. "Is this true?"

Ildefonse made a sour face. "It is true, in every particular."

"Then why did you not say so before?"

"I did not want to confuse a case already turbulent with emotion."

"Most peculiar." With a set face Gilgad resumed his seat, but Zilifant immediately sprang erect. "Nonetheless and undeniably, Rhialto destroyed my harquisade tree with his floating plasm and left a horrid stench about the premises; further, so the rumor goes, he 

boasted of his accuracy, and imputed the source of the odor to me, Zilifant!"

"I did nothing of the sort," said Rhialto.

"Bah! The evidence is clear, straightforward and unambiguous!"

"Is it, indeed? Mune the Mage and Perdustin were both present at Falu during the experiment. They saw me create four lumes of plasm. One drifted through my delicate silvanissa tendrils, doing no harm. Mune walked through another and failed to complain of odor. We watched all four lumes dwindle to sparks and die. None escaped; none departed the area adjacent to Falu."

Zilifant looked uncertainly from Mune the Mage to Perdustin. "Are these allegations accurate?"

"In a word: yes," said Mune the Mage.

"Why did you not so inform me?"

"Since Rhialto was guilty of other offenses, it seemed unimportant."

"Not to me," said Rhialto.

"Possibly not to you."

"Who informed you of my boasts and insults?"

Zilifant glanced uncertainly toward Hache-Moncour. "I am not sure that I remember properly."

Rhialto turned back to Ildefonse. "What are these other crimes of which I am guilty?"

Hurtiancz responded to the challenge. "You cast a spell upon my hat! You sent out mocking pictures!"

"I did nothing of the sort."

I suppose you can prove otherwise."

"What does the pattern of events suggest? Clearly, the act was performed by the same person who beat Gilgad's beast and vandalized Zilifant's tree. That person was not I."

Hurtiancz uttered a sour grunt. "So much seems to the point. I retract the charge."

Rhialto stepped forward. "Now then: what other crimes have I committed?"

No one spoke.

"In that case, I must now place counter-charges. I accuse the members of this association, singly and jointly, with the exception of myself, of several felonies."

Rhialto presented a tablet to Ildefonse. "Thereon I detail the charges. Preceptor, be good enough to read them off."

With a grimace of distaste Ildefonse took the tablet.

"Rhialto, are you sure that you wish to go so far? Mistakes have been made; so much we acknowledge! Let us all, yourself included, make a virtue of humility, and proceed with renewed faith into the future! Each of your comrades will advise and assist you in every convenient way, and soon your situation will repair itself! Rhialto, is not this the better way?"

Rhialto enthusiastically clapped his hands together. "Ildefonse, as always, your wisdom is profound! Why, indeed, should we undergo the sordid excesses of a full-blown legal action? Each member of this group need only tender his apology, restore my goods along with triple damages, and we will return to the old footing. Hache-Moncour, why do you not set the example?"

"Gladly," declared Hache-Moncour. "However, I would thereby compromise the others of the group. Whatever my personal concepts, I must await a vote."

Rhialto asked: "Hurtiancz, what of you? Do you care to come forward and apologize?"

Hurtiancz shouted something incomprehensible.

Rhialto turned to Ildefonse: "What of yourself?"

Ildefonse cleared his throat. ' 'I will now read the bill of accusations brought by Rhialto against this association. In detail the charges occupy eighteen pages. I will first read the Topic Headings':

"Title One: Trespass.

"Title Two: Larceny, Grand.

"Title Three: Larceny, Petty.

"Title Four: Vandalism.

"Title Five: Assault, upon the person of Frole.

"Title Six: Slander.

"Title Seven: Dishonour to the Monstrament, including wilful mutilation and casting down of a certified copy thereof.

"Title Eight: Conspiracy to commit the above crimes.

"Title Nine: Wilful Retention of stolen property.

"Title Ten: Failure to abide by the Blue Principles, as propounded in the Monstrament."

Ildefonse put the tablet down upon his desk. "I will read the full charges presently, but at this moment, let me ask this: your topics and titles—are they not excessive to the case?"

Rhialto shrugged. ' They decribe most of the crimes involved, but not all."

"How so? The list seems all-inclusive."

 

"Have you forgotten the basic mystery? Who sent the pictures which mocked Hurtiancz? Who hung the opal on the drop-chain and thereby offended Ao? Who beat Gilgad's beast? Who destroyed Zilifant's tree? Do not these mysteries cry out for a solution?"

"They are cryptic indeed," admitted Ildefonse. "Of course sheer coincidence might be at work—no? You reject this theory? Well, perhaps so. Still, the questions are not included on your bill of accusations, and so lack immediate relevance."

"As you like," said Rhialto. "I suggest that you appoint a committee composed of Hurtiancz, Ao, Gilgad and Zilifant to pursue the matter."

"All in good time. I will now read the 'Bill of Accusations' in full."

"There is no need to do so," said Rhialto. "The association is well aware of the charges. I myself am not inflexible; three avenues, at least, are open. First, the group by acclamation may yield the damages I seek; secondly, the Preceptor, using his executive powers, may impose the specified levies; or thirdly, we will present the bill to the Adjudicator, for his judgment by the exact schedules of the Monstra-ment. Ildefonse, will you kindly ascertain which avenue is most congenial to this group?"

Ildefonse gave a guttural grunt. "What must be, must be. I move that we accept Rhialto's demands, even though a few minor hardships may be encountered. Is there a second?"

"Hold!" Barbanikos leapt to his feet, his great plume of white hair waving like a flame. "I must point out that the penalties invoked against Rhialto were partly in censure of his odious personality, so that in no way can he demand full restitution, let alone damages!"

"Hear, hear!" cried Haze of Wheary Water and others.

Thus encouraged, Barbanikos continued: "Any sensitive person would have recognized the reprimand for what it was; he would have returned meekly to the group, anxious only to vindicate himself. Instead, what do we have? A surly visage, a hectoring manner, slurs and threats! Is this appropriate conduct for a person who has just been decisively chastised by his peers?"

Barbanikos paused to refresh himself with a sip of tonic, then proceeded.

"Rhialto has learned nothing! He shows the same impudence as before! Therefore I earnestly recommend that Rhialto's tantrums be ignored. If they proceed, I suggest that he be turned out of doors by the footmen. Rhialto, I say this to you and no more: take care! Be 

ruled by prudence! You will be the happier man for it! That is my first remark. Now, as for my second—"

Ildefonse interrupted. "Yes, most interesting! Barbanikos, thank you for your incisive opinions."

Barbanikos reluctantly resumed his seat. Ildefonse asked: "Once again: is there a second to my motion?"

"I second the motion," said Rhialto. "Let us now see who votes for and who votes against the Blue Principles."

Hache-Moncour stepped forward. ' There is still another point to be considered. In our discussion we have made frequent reference to the Monstrament. May I ask as to who can furnish the group a full, undamaged and authentic text? Ildefonse, you naturally include such a document among your references?"

Ildefonse groaned toward the ceiling. "I would not know where to look. Rhialto, however, has brought here, as an exhibit, such a document."

"Unfortunately, Rhialto's exhibit, whatever it purports to be, is torn and no longer valuable. We must insist upon absolute authenticity: in this case, the Perciplex itself. Put Rhialto's damaged scrap out of mind. We will study the Monstrament at Fader's Waft; then and only then will we be able to vote with conviction."

Ildefonse said: "Do you put that in the form of a motion?"

"I do."

Herark the Harbinger called out: "I second the motion!"

The vote was carried almost unanimously, the only silent voices being those of Ildefonse and Rhialto.

Herark rose to his feet. "The hour is late; our time is short! Each of us must resolve to visit Fader's Waft and study the Perciplex at his earliest convenience. Then, when Ildefonse ascertains that all have done their duty, he shall reconvene the conclave and we will once more consider this affair, in a more conciliatory atmosphere, or so I trust."