Tananguard 02 - To Love a Lord (14 page)

He nodded. “Then I will be back soon.”

“But where are you going?”

“To sober up your brother.”

Eight hours later, Connor and Sophia exchanged vows before a priest and two witnesses, Garret and Thomas. An hour later, Connor carried Sophia across the threshold of her home. He made love to her then, reveling in the glory and joy she brought him. She was and always would be the only woman he would ever love.

Maggie watched Kara follow Josephine into the woods. She hadn’t meant to eves drop, but she had. People in the camp had their speculations about Josephine and young Garret. Many believed she’d been wronged by Lucas, but no one knew how. And now with Connor Tananguard’s face fresh on everyone’s mind, they knew young Garret was not Lucas’s offspring. Yes, they all believed Josephine had been wronged in some horrible manor, but they believed her innocent—all except Kara. Kara had drawn her own wretched conclusions, conclusions that had just been proven wrong. But there was more to Josephine’s story, and Maggie suspected it was written on that piece of paper she’d thrown at Kara. She wondered what it said, not that she could read it given the opportunity. She had never learned. Henry Weston, the Hoffman butler, had promised to teach her once, but there was never time to learn. She sighed.

“What ails you today, Maggie?” a kind voice asked from behind her.

She jumped slightly, turning to find Thomas watching her with concern. “Thomas,” she said, placing a hand to her chest. “You startled me.”

“My apologies. I did not mean to,” he said sincerely.

She smiled at him. “I know you didn’t.”

He was so kind to her. He was one of the few who actually was.
The others of the camp aside from Kara and William…they spoke to her when needed, but she could see the judgment in their eyes. They didn’t sympathize with her as they did Josephine. They looked at her accusingly, some even with disdain. Then there were the rumors. As a maid in a lord’s manor, she had learned long ago to blend into her surroundings, to be there and not be noticed. Even here, those skills came in handy, but sometimes she wished she wasn’t so good at it. She’d heard the rumors being spread about her, and worse, the name they used when they thought she couldn’t hear.
Lucas’s whore.
It hurt, but wasn’t it true? Isn’t that basically what she had been? And now she carried his child, and everyone knew. They all thought less of her because of it, claimed she somehow tried to get pregnant. That she’d planned it to manipulate him. Those were the rumors anyway. Because of them, people distrusted her and avoided her. But Thomas was different. He didn’t seem to care what her past held and whose child she carried. He was simply a caring friend, a needed friend.

“I noticed you standing here alone, and I thought you may need some company,” he admitted.

“I would welcome it, but perhaps you could answer a question for me first,” she said.

“Yes, of course. Anything.”

She smiled. “I really don’t know if you’ll be able to answer it, but I will ask because I need to know the answer. What happened to Josephine? How was Lucas involved?” she braved. She did need to know
. For her sanity, she needed to know. She’d fallen in love with a man who was caring and gentle. He had smiled a lot. He made her laugh and made her feel important. But then it changed. He changed. The monster within began to emerge. By the time it was too late for her, she saw his true nature. Who was Lucas really? What kind of a man had she fallen in love with?

Thomas sighed, his eagerness to help suddenly gone. “Perhaps I spoke too soon.”

“Then you do not know,” she said with disappointment.

He looked around as if to see where the nearest person was. “It’s not that. I do in fact know. I just don’t know if it’s my place to tell the story.” He looked at her apologetically.

She nodded. “I understand. Thank you anyway.” She didn’t really feel like company anymore. She turned from him, wanting to walk away and be alone.

“Wait…Maggie
…I…” Thomas sighed again. “I’ll tell you.”

She turned in surprise. “
You will? Thank you, Thomas. I will keep it to myself. I promise.”

He nodded, glancing around them again to make certain they were
indeed alone. “Josephine and Connor Tananguard fell in love. That much I know for certain even after what Josephine shouted to Kara about a bet. It was obvious then as much as it is now. He loved her,” he emphasized.

Maggie nodded.

“They were married. Connor wed her before taking her to his bed.”

Maggie
flinched visibly as if Thomas had struck her. Connor married Josephine? A man of nobility married a commoner?
Maggie, you fool! You stupid, stupid fool!
Her eyes burned. Lucas had refused to marry her, giving her excuse after excuse as to why he couldn’t. And Maggie always believed him. She was a naïve fool indeed!

“A
h Maggie, I’m sorry. I didn’t think about your situation and how that news might affect you. I was just trying to explain. It was important you knew they were married. It tells how much he truly loved her,” he said with sympathy.

She nodded, trying her best to hide her pain
, trying her best not to shed tears over it. “I know you weren’t trying to hurt me, Thomas. I want to hear more. Go on,” she encouraged with a small smile. Within, her heart bled. Lucas had used her, lied to her, and made her believe he loved her! And part of her still loved him!

But once
—once—he
did
say something that felt real. She was almost asleep, and she was certain he thought her asleep. He said,
“I love you, Maggie. In what small way I can, I do think I love you. But it can never be.”

It was something she’d often thought on and wondered about. She thought perhaps she’d dreamt it, but then why would she
dream the last line? And what did it mean? Now she knew. She and Lucas would never be together in the way she wanted. He may have actually loved her in his strange way, but he never would have made an honest woman out of her. She would always be his mistress and nothing more, or would have if he still lived.

Thomas nodded with reserve. “
Very well. Garret and I were witness to the wedding. It was small, nothing fancy, just the four of us and the priest. But I have never seen two people more happy than Josephine and Connor on that day. However, there
was
a bet. And Josephine found out about it. She was distraught, and Lucas took advantage in a very intimate way.”

“You mean he…,” she trailed off, not wanting to voice what she knew.

Thomas nodded. “Connor found Josephine with Lucas in Lucas’s room. And that is all I know.” He studied her, his eyes swarming with concern and worry. He was afraid for her, afraid of how this information would be received.

She swallowed, trying her best not to show any emotion other than gratitude. “Thank you
for telling me.” Her mind was in turmoil though. She’d fallen in love with the devil himself! She wanted to cry, not for herself, but for Josephine and Connor.

“Are you al
l right?” Thomas asked quietly.

“Yes. This helps me greatly. I was afraid he’d…,” she trailed off. She was afraid Lucas had
forced himself on Josephine, but how is what he did any different than that? He’d manipulated the situation, knowing just what to do or say to lure Josephine to his bed. He always knew.

Maggie cringed within. He
’d known how to get her there, and once he did, she’d allowed him to again and again. “They are right,” she said quietly to herself. “I was his whore.”

“What?”
Thomas asked in shock. “Who says that?”

“Everyone here, Thomas,” she whispered in shame.

“No,” he said, shaking his head.

“Deny it if you will, but they do and it is true.”

He grabbed her shoulders almost roughly. “It is not true! He took advantage of you just as he did Josephine! Did you encourage his advances?”

She shook her head, but she couldn’t look at him.
“No. I tried to avoid him, but he was always there,” she admitted. It was true. When news came that Lucas would be returning to the Hoffman manor, Mr. Weston told her to keep her distance from Lucas if possible. So Maggie did. She avoided him, and she was good at it. Then one of the kitchen maids grew ill. She was an older woman who helped prepare the meals before serving them. Maggie was the only one capable of taking her place while she was sick. She knew the position, and she was young enough that she could work it and her usual chores without trouble.

When she brought the meals to the table, s
he kept her eyes down, avoided being in direct view, and did what she did best, blended in to her surroundings. It worked for the first two days, but the third day, Lucas wanted his meal in his room.

Maggie entered the kitchen in a hurry. She was on double duty until Rose was well again. There weren’t enough maids in this household for one of them to be sick.
Lord Archibald Hoffman was too stingy to hire more. Maggie had been up since four trying to get her usual chores done before breakfast.

Mrs. Murphy stared at her in dismay. “Your cheeks are flushed. Oh…what do we do? My innocent Maggie.”

Maggie gave her a puzzled look. “Mrs. Murphy?” she questioned. What did it matter that her cheeks were flushed? She’d made it on time, and she had removed the cobwebs from most of the third floor already. She was actually quite pleased with her accomplishments thus far today.

Mrs. Murphy
wrung her hands together. “Young Master Hoffman wishes his meal in his room this morning.”

Maggie nodded. “Am I to just leave it on the table?”

Mrs. Murphy nodded, but her face furrowed in worry.

“He may still be asleep,” Cook said comfortingly. “He may not even see her.”

“Oh…,” Mrs. Murphy groaned, “I hope you’re right.”

“Goodness,” Maggie said with a laugh. “You act as if I’m headed to my doom. I promise to be on my best behavior. I won’t drop a scrap
.”

Cook smiled at her with affection. “Innocent as a babe.”

Maggie sighed. “Both of you are speaking nonsense this morning.” She picked up the tray that was obviously for him. The breakfast plate was covered with a silver, rounded lid to keep it warm. There was freshly squeezed juice in a small pitcher and an empty glass on the side. “Are there any other instructions before I take this to him?”

Mrs. Murphy nodded. “Yes. Keep your head down. Do not make eye contact whatsoever. Slouch forward, girl,” she instructed, shoving at Maggie’s shoulders. “Be swift. Don’t let him get a good look at you, understand?”

Maggie almost laughed again
because of the absurdity of those instructions, but she held her tongue due to the worried expressions on both Mrs. Murphy and Cook’s faces.

Then the fat cook stripped her apron off. “
Put that down and turn around,” she ordered.

Maggie placed the tray back down on the serving cart. She turned around and was drowned in fabric.
“Cook!” she exclaimed. “What are you doing?” White cloth covered her face for a brief moment before it was pulled into place and tied loosely about her waste. The cook had covered Maggie with the oversized apron.

“That should hide her figure some.”

Maggie gaped at her. Was her figure so displeasing? She had one. That much was for certain. She was slender, but her breasts were too large and her hips stood out. She didn’t know what she’d done to deserve such a cursed figure. And her uniform only accented her curves. It was too snug around her bust. Luckily, her own apron came up high enough to hide what the dress could not, and now with Cook’s apron on top of that, she was quite hidden altogether.

“It will have to do,” Mrs. Murphy commented. “Remember, keep your head down.”
She handed Maggie the tray.

Maggie
nodded as she walked away with the tray of food.

“Perhaps we should have put soot on her f
ace,” Mrs. Murphy said in contemplation.

“I don’t even think soot would hide her beauty.”

Those two old fools! She was simple and plain, and even if she wasn’t, a lord would never notice a lowly maid. But for their sakes, she would do as they said and do her best not to be noticed. She didn’t want to displease anyone, especially Master Hoffman.

Lucas Hoffman’s room was on the second floor. It was a large house, and the tray was awkward. By the time she made it to the room,
Maggie’s arms were cramping. She shifted the weight and knocked on the large, double doors. There wasn’t a sound in return. She knew with his father one knocked, waited for a moment, and entered. Then she was to put the tray on the table and leave. She’d done it for him many times over the years. So that is what she planned to do today for Lucas.

Maggie opened the right door slowly, peering inside the room before entering. It was dark with the curtains still down to block out the sun. She could see well enough to know where to place the tray. She shifted it again, doing her best to stay hunched forward and keep her head down.
Goodness, her body was beginning to cramp in such a position. She considered straightening, but rustling noises from the bed stopped her. She paused, glancing at it beneath her lashes, keeping her head down. He was probably just rolling over in his sleep, but to be safe, she stayed hunched. She slipped silently over to the table and placed the tray down. Then she turned to go.