Tangled Past (18 page)

“Did you think to hide that you were sleeping in Nate’s bed this morning, not your husband’s?”

Her veins chilled to ice as she realized the damage the woman could do in the community. A whisper here and there could quickly set the rural grapevine afire. “I shared the bed with my husband, thank you. And I’ll thank you to keep such mean-spirited gossip to yourself.”

To her surprise, instead of being angry at the rebuke, Martha nodded. “Good. Glad to see you’re taking that attitude. There’s hope for the three of you yet.”

“The three of us?”

Martha nodded as she slipped onto the bench opposite Sarah. “I’ve got eyes in my head, girl. And ears too. Jackson loves you, but so does Nate. And those boys love each other too, as much as they try to deny themselves.” She reached across and patted Sarah’s hand. “Just try to keep what goes on here to yourselves.”

They were that obvious? She forced herself to pick up her fork and stabbed a piece of sausage. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“As I said, I’ve got eyes in my head. Finding you in Nate’s bed this morning only confirmed what I’ve suspected for a while now. You’re lying with them both, aren’t you?”

The small amount of food she’d forced down threatened to make another appearance. “You mustn’t tell anyone. Please.”

“Oh, bless your heart, child, I wouldn’t say a word to anyone. I’m good at keeping secrets. Trust me. I’d kill myself before I’d hurt Jackson.”

The emphasis the older woman placed on her last sentence spoke volumes. If only Sarah could decipher what she implied. She ran through what Martha had told her earlier about Jackson’s grandparents. Of how Mary had lived with two men. How Martha had fought to bring Mary’s daughter with them. Of her anger that she might have betrayed Jackson.

Sarah sat up in her chair. Why hadn’t she seen it before? “There was no Mary, was there? You’re Ruth’s mother. It’s not Nate you come to visit, it’s Jackson.”

Martha stared, her eyes wide in horror. “No. You mustn’t say such things.”

“But I’m right. Aren’t I?” She leaned forward, the pieces clicking together like a child’s puzzle. “You didn’t start working for the Campbells until after Jackson’s father died. After Jackson came here to live. You’re his grandmother.”

“You mustn’t tell anyone. Not even Jackson.” Her fingernails dug into Sarah’s wrist, though Sarah doubted Martha was aware how hard she was gripping. “You have to promise me.”

“For heaven’s sake, why not? Jackson thinks he’s alone in the world. Do you know what it would mean to him to know he’s not? That his grandmother is alive? You have to tell him. Please, Martha.”

“I can’t. My husband made me promise I’d never acknowledge Ruth or him as blood kin. I begged Abner to let me keep her with us, but he refused. To this day, he says it’s God’s punishment for my fornicating with savages. If he found out anyone else knew, that I’d told you, he’d send me away. I’d end up working as a street walker selling myself to drunkards and worse for pennies.”

“Jackson would never let that happen. You could come live with us.”

“I couldn’t. Abner would tell everyone what I’d done. Neither Jackson or you would escape their censure either. Please, you mustn’t say anything to Jackson or anyone.”

“She doesn’t have to tell me because you just did,” Jackson said from the doorway.

Martha jumped from her seat, her hands twisting in front of her. “Please forgive me. I loved your mother. I hated having to leave her with the Gallaghers, but I didn’t have any choice. Abner was willing to overlook where he’d met me, but if I hadn’t agreed to give Ruth up, he would have left me in the whorehouse.”

He took off his hat and ran a hand through his hair. “Did Mama know who you were? That you were her real mother?”

“No. I didn’t dare tell her.” Tears streamed down Martha’s cheeks. “I wanted to tell her, please believe me. But when she was little, it was too dangerous, and when she was older, when she was carryin’ you, I was too afraid. I had a home and a husband who accepted me. I had Charles and Olivia to think about. While they knew I’d lived with the Indians, they had no idea that I’d been…they have no idea Ruth was their half-sister.”

“You don’t need to worry. I won’t tell anyone.” His hand shook as he placed it on her shoulder. “You really are my grandmother?”

“Yes.” Hope flared in her eyes, and her voice steadied.

He enveloped Martha in his arms and cradled her, his eyes closed. Sarah pressed the heel of her hand to her chest as they stood there for a long time, just rocking each other. When they finally broke apart, Jackson swiped his thumb beneath his eyes and blew out a long breath. “If Abner ever hurts you or threatens you, if he tries to use it against you because he thinks someone knows, you come to me. You hear? You don’t ever need to worry that you won’t have a home.”

Sniffling, Martha smiled and reached up to touch his cheek. “I’ll remember that.”

She took a deep breath and straightened her spine, returning to the in-control woman they knew. “Well, I think I’ve had about all the surprises I can handle for a day. I think I’ll leave you two alone.” She faced Sarah. “You treat my grandson right. Or you’ll be answering to me.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Sarah smiled at the wink the older woman gave her.

Once they were alone, Jackson tugged her into his arms. “I’ve known her all my life and never figured that she was my grandmother. How’d you figure it out?”

“Maybe because I haven’t known her all my life?” She rested her head against his chest, his heart thumping softly against her ear. Steady. Strong. “You don’t blame her for not telling you or your mother, do you?”

“Nope. She made the best of a bad situation. Despite what Miss Martha thinks, the Gallaghers were kind to Mama. Probably kinder than that horse’s hind end Abner Simons would have been to her.”

One of the farm hands yelled to another, reminding her that he’d returned unexpectedly. “Why did you come back anyway?”

“I saw Nate leaving in the cart and figured we should talk without him around.” His expression grew serious. “About what he proposed last night. The decision is completely yours, Sarah. If you want to go back and see if we can make the McLeod ranch work, I’ll go with you. If you want to sell it and buy something closer around here, I’ll do that too. Last night…that was a gift I cannot repay. But I took vows to be faithful to you, Sarah. I intend to honor them.”

That he was giving her full control touched her. He was willing to walk away from not only Nate, but his family. “If I never set eyes on the McLeod ranch again, I’ll be happy. I know how important it is to have family, to have people you care about and who care about you. I’m not about to take Martha away from you now you’ve just found her.”

She looked around the kitchen and realized she’d spent a lot of hours either working with Martha talking and laughing or sitting at the table with Jackson and Nate, making good memories. By marrying her, Jackson had become her family. Which meant Martha was as well. And, though he might not be related by blood, Nate.

“You don’t have to make a decision today, Sarah. We’ve got lots of time.”

Why should she deny herself the happiness that swelled within her by adding distance between them? “There’s no decision to make. I think we should stay here. Martha will continue to come over, and no one will question it. With Nate’s injury, he’s going to need help, and no one will question us staying to help him out either. I may end up in the fires of hell for admitting it, but I loved last night. I love you, and I love Nate too. I say we agree to Nate’s suggestion.”

His body went absolutely still. The emotions that played across his face—hope, love, need—told her she’d made the right choice. “Are you sure?”

“More than any decision I’ve ever made before.” She laced her fingers with his and led him upstairs.

He stayed still as she untied his bandana and smoothed it out, laying it on the bed. His chaps were soon removed and set aside. Her teeth tugging at her bottom lip, she unbuttoned his shirt.

A gentle smile tilted the corners of his lips, softening his normally hard expression. He pulled his shirttails from his trousers and over his head. His undervest quickly followed it.

When she knelt in front of him and unbuttoned the front placket of his pants, Jackson stroked her hair, lifting the long strands and letting them fall through his fingers. No words were needed between them as he stepped out of his trousers. The flap covering the opening of his drawers was taut, outlining his erection. She traced a finger along the thick shaft, then tugged at the silk tape at his waist.

The wood hard beneath her knees, Sarah lifted her eyes as she let his drawers fall around his ankles. Her tongue darted out to moisten her lips. She touched it to the slit of his cock and swiped it around the head, leaving it glistening. His grip on her hair tightened when her lips closed around the shaft and slowly travelled its length until her nose rested against the nest of curls at its base.

A horse whinneyed outside, a stallion calling to a mare perhaps, and a crow called its raucous caw as it flew overhead. But inside their bedroom, all she could hear was the pounding of her pulse in her ears and Jackson’s soft growl.

At first he let her set the pace, a gentle back and forth motion, her tongue slapping at his swollen head with each pass. His cock swelled against her tongue, and his fingers held her in place. He pumped his hips, forcing her to relax the back of her mouth with each stroke. A dribble of his seed was all the warning he gave her before he cursed, his hips bucking.

She swallowed, almost frantically, as pulse after pulse of hot salty essence poured down her throat.

As his cock softened in her mouth, she licked it clean then pulled back to sit on her heels.

“Damn. I’d intended to finish inside you.” He held out his hand and lifted her to her feet.

“I like doing that for you.” From the way her body pulsed deep inside, and the moisture between her thighs, her body approved too.

“I don’t recall objecting to it.” The lines at the side of his eyes crinkled as he smiled. He swiped his thumb over her lips. “I want to pleasure you too, but it’s gonna take me some time to recover.”

She ran a finger down his breastbone. “I can think of a couple things you can do in the meantime.”

His eyes darkened. “So can I. Starting with getting you as nekkid as the day you were born.”

She backed up when he crowded her, stopping only when the back of her knees hit the bed. “Seems fair, considering what you’re wearing.”

He undid just enough buttons to be able to pull her dress over her head. Once he’d removed it, he dumped it on the floor.

She crooked him a smile. “That poor thing really needs an ironing, the way it’s been treated lately.”

“I prefer you dressed the way you are now.” His fingers trailed down her neck and around her breasts, tracing her areola that puckered at his touch. “I had no idea you weren’t wearing a chemise under your dress. If I’d known I’d have had you naked and flat on your back downstairs.”

“Promises, promises.”

She screeched when he picked her up and tossed her on the mattress. Before she could move, he was on top of her, the bandana in his hands and a feral look in his eyes.

“Grab on to that headboard again, darlin’.”

Her body aching in anticipation, she obeyed him without hesitation. Once he’d secured her, he began to tease and titillate every inch of her body, his lips latching on to her nipples as his hands found all those places he knew excited her.

Nate toed off his boots in the front hall. He started to head for the kitchen to see if Sarah was there so he could talk to her about his plan, when he heard a rhythmic squeaking overhead. Instead of the normal guilt-ridden envy, love flooded through him.

Last night, Sarah and Jackson had given him a gift he’d never be able to repay. Themselves and each other. Both had so much to lose by inviting him into their bedroom, yet they’d done it without hesitation.

He debated going back outside and leaving them to complete their marital relations without an audience but instead found himself upstairs and halfway down the hall. He couldn’t stop himself from pausing in their doorway and watching.

Was there anything as beautiful as Sarah? Her head thrown back, hands tied to the headboard with a red cloth that Nate recognized as Jackson’s favorite bandanna. They were both naked, with Jackson’s dark head nestled between her thighs. The muscles rippling along Jackson’s back, his butt taut, rocking against the mattress in search of his own release as he pleasured his wife.

Though he couldn’t see Jackson’s face, Nate knew what he’d see. A look of ecstasy, of sheer animalistic carnality.

The heady scent of sex filled the room. Sarah gasped the unique sound signaling she was about to find her pleasure. Hard. Moments later, her body arched off the mattress, her limbs shaking as her release overcame her.

Not for the first time, he wished he was an artist who could capture their expressions, the sheer love they had for each other, for eternity. But he doubted anyone had that type of talent, not even if they had one of those newfangled cameras.

Jackson raised his head, his cheeks and lips glistening with Sarah’s juices. “Go get that jar of ointment from your bedroom, will you, Nate?”

Not even a hello. Obviously Jackson had known he was watching.

Nate chuckled to himself as he did as Jackson bid. He handed the jar to Jackson. He already knew Jackson didn’t intend to use it on him. “Mind if I watch?”

“You’re gonna do more than watch. Get your clothes off and get on the bed.” Jackson’s voice was rough, guttural, which Nate knew meant he was primed and ready and having a hard time holding off not burying himself in Sarah and fucking her brains out.

Nate quickly stripped off his clothes and knelt on the bed beside Sarah. “What do you have planned?”

“Lie down beside her. You’ll find out soon enough.” Jackson untied Sarah’s hands and chafed her wrists. “Turn over, darlin’.”

A questioning look on her face, she lay belly down, her face turned toward Nate. She reached out and stroked his hip with her fingers as Jackson nudged her thighs apart and positioned himself between them.