Teaching Patience (Homespun) (2 page)

Once the house came into view she took some deep calming breaths.  It wouldn’t do for her mama to see her in such a state.  She walked into the house, which had grown considerably over the years.  Her papa and brothers had added on three more bedrooms and a sitting room.  Just the act of stepping into her home was calming for her, because her home was filled with love. 

She went straight to the bedroom she shared with her sister Grace to put her things away, and then went to the kitchen to help her mama with supper.  Millie took one look at her drawn face and asked her what happened.

Patience sighed.  “I need to learn to live up to my name.”
  She’d always felt she’d been given the name Patience, because somehow her parents had known she’d be fighting for patience all of her life.  Her father said it wasn’t true, but he always had a twinkle in his eye as he said it, so she still believed it had to be the case.  Either way, it was certainly a slap in the face every time she thought about it.

Millie smiled.  “I’m glad I wasn’t blessed with a name like yours I’d never be able to live up to.”

Patience stared at her mother in shock.  “You’re always so patient.  No matter what happens, you just smile and keep going.  I’ve never once seen you get angry, even when one of us deserved it.”

“I hide it well.”  She led Patience to the table and sat down.  “Tell me what happened.”
  Patience knew she had a lot to do, but as always, when she had a problem her mother gave her full attention to the problem.

“You know I’ve been having problems with little Charlie Walker.  He doesn’t think he should have to learn anything because he’s going to be a farmer and farmers don’t need to know how to read.  He missed all but three of his spelling words this afternoon.  And they were easy words, Mama!”
  Patience was still angry enough to kick something, but she didn’t think her toes could handle any more abuse this afternoon.

Millie nodded.  “So what did you do?”

“I made him copy each of the words he missed onto the blackboard five times.”

“That sounds like a reasonable punishment.  So what went wrong?”

“He wasn’t finished when his father got there, so I went out to talk to him about Charlie’s attitude.  I asked that he encourage him to study harder and learn more so he can better himself.”  Patience made a face.  “He had the gall to tell me he didn’t think I had respect for farmers.”

Millie smiled.  “I’ve talked to Mr. Walker a time or two.  He doesn’t like anyone saying anything negative about his son.  He’s raised him completely alone, you know.”
  Millie’s words made Patience sigh.  She should have been able to control her temper.

“How did his wife die?”

Millie shook her head.  “I don’t know.  You’ll have to ask him that.  I only know he’s very proud of his son, and won’t hear anything against him.  He’s a good father.  Charlie is mostly well behaved.  He’s just got a lot of energy like any boy his age.”

Patience nodded.  “I was so angry with Mr. Walker for the way he talked to me.  I told him I’d pray for him.”
  She looked down at her hands as she said it, knowing her mama would understand.

Millie laughed.  “Did you mean it?  Or were you just saying it to avoid saying something
spiteful.”

“Oh, I meant it.  I thought I’d pray he got a new outlook on life
.  He asked if I’d pray he got kicked by a mule.  It was so close to what I was thinking I was instantly ashamed.  I need to apologize to him for what I was thinking, but I don’t ever want to talk to that hateful man again.”

Millie squeezed her daughter’s hands.  “He’s not hateful, Patience.  He’s really a good man who loves God with all his heart.  You need to give him a chance to show you that.”

“I wish I didn’t have hateful thoughts.  You’re always so calm.  How do you do it?”

Millie laughed.  “I remember once your papa got onto me for not having lunch ready on time.  I’d just gotten here, and I was working on getting the house cleaned.  I don’t know if you remember how dirty it was in the months before I came.”

Patience nodded.  “I do remember that.  I was so happy you were here making it clean, and fixing good food.”

“Well, I decided to make a pie for supper and I was so mad at your papa that I remember hoping cherries made him break out in hives while I cooked it.”

Patience’s jaw dropped.  “You really thought that?  About Papa?”  She couldn’t imagine Millie having hateful thoughts toward anyone, but her papa? 

Millie smiled.  “I sure did.  He made me so angry I was ready to spit nails.  I felt like he didn’t see the things I’d done, just what I didn’t do.
  I was working so hard to show him I was old enough to be his wife and that I’d be a good wife and mother.”

Patience thought about that for a moment.  “I never would have guessed.  You always seem so calm and happy.”

“There have been many times I’ve been glad you children couldn’t read my thoughts and moods.  I’m not perfect.  I still have thoughts like that from time to time.  It’s human nature.  When you start feeling that way, you need to pray about it, and God will help you get past it.”

Patience nodded.  “I’m going to make sure I take the time to talk to Mr. Walker at church on Sunday.  I don’t need to harbor the anger I’m feeling.”

Millie stood and went to the stove to stir the beans she had cooking.  “I think that’s a fine idea.  Now, why don’t you mix up the cornbread for me?  I’m going to bake a cherry pie for supper.”

“Because you’re mad at Papa?”
  Patience was confused.

“Because I love him.  Every time I think about the evil thoughts I had toward him, I always make a special dessert I know he’ll love.  It makes me feel better, even though he doesn’t know I ever had those mean thoughts.”

Patience found herself dreading church on Sunday morning for the first time in her life, not because she didn’t like church, but because she knew she needed to apologize to Mr. Walker.  Her comment about praying for him had been condescending and rude, and she’d had no right to make it.  She didn’t know if she’d be talking to him about it if he hadn’t realized she didn’t mean it in a good way, but she liked to think she would.

She dressed carefully in a pink long-sleeved dress and a new sunbonnet.  Her waist length blond hair was braided and wrapped around the back of her head.  She sat in the back seat of the wagon as her papa drove into town, clutching her Bible in her lap and mentally rehearsing exactly what she would say.

She didn’t get a chance to say anything before the sermon because Mr. Walker and Charlie got there right as the singing started.  Afterward, she sought out Mr. Walker instead of chatting with her friends as she usually did after the service.

“Mr. Walker?”
  She studied the man as she waited for him to acknowledge her.  He was tall with broad shoulders and had dark hair and eyes.  She took after her mother with fair hair and blue eyes.  His skin was dark and tanned from the hours he spent outdoors.  He wore a pair of dark pants and a white button up shirt with a nice tie.  He looked very different today from how he looked when he picked Charlie up after school every day.

He turned, lifting one eyebrow at her.  “Yes?”
  His face told her he was not going to have another discussion about his son’s behavior and if that’s why he was approaching her, she could just leave him alone.

She sucked in a deep breath
saying a quick silent prayer to help her say the right thing.  “I want to apologize to you for what I said on Friday.” 

“Really?”
  His face showed he didn’t believe she was at all sorry for what she’d said.

She nodded.  “I shouldn’t have said I’d pray for you the way I did.”

“So you won’t pray for me?  Am I not good enough for you to pray for?”  He deliberately misunderstood what she’d meant to make her squirm.  He found he enjoyed watching the pretty schoolteacher stumble over her words.  If life were different, he’d be asking her father for permission to court her.  He was surprised when the thought entered his head.  He hadn’t been interested in courting anyone since the fiasco with his wife.

“That’s not what I mean.  I mean I shouldn’t have said it the way I did.  I said it in a condescending manner, and that was wrong of me, and I’m sorry.”
  She paused, her guileless eyes looking up into his.  “I pray for all of my students and their parents.”

He crossed his arms over his chest, just as he had on Friday afternoon.  “
But you won’t pray for me?”  He had to force himself not to smile as he watched her try to formulate a good response to his question.

“Yes, I’ll pray for you.  I’ll pray you will work with me to help instill a love of learning in Charlie, but I won’t pray you get kicked by a mule.”

He smiled for the first time.  “How many times have you prayed I’d get kicked by a mule?”  The emotions that ran across her face were fascinating to him.  He’d never seen a woman who had such an expressive face, and he found he liked it a lot.

She sighed.  “I’ve never prayed that about anyone.  I just wanted to with you, and I’m sorry for that.”
  Was there a more exasperating man in all of God’s creation than Hugh Walker? 

“Apology accepted.”

“Thank you for that.”  She stood looking at him as if trying to think of something else to say, but nothing came to mind.  “I hope you enjoy your Sunday.”  She turned and walked away.

Hugh stood and watched the little schoolteacher walk off, trying not to laugh out loud.  He had to give her credit, though.  Not many women would have admitted to the unkind thoughts she’d had as she did. 
He found himself reluctantly admiring her. 

He was glad he had decided to move to Minnesota with Charlie.  When his wife had declared she was going to divorce him and marry another man, he hadn’t known what to think.  He’d always been a God fearing man, and it had never occurred to him his wife
would just run off and marry someone else.  His pastor had assured him he’d done nothing wrong and he was free to remarry, but he felt as if he was tainted somehow.  Leaving the farm in upstate New York and moving out west was the best thing he could have done.  Everyone assumed he was a widower, and no one was looking at him as if he were an ogre anymore. 

If only he knew what to do about Charlie.  He was a good boy, but he was so rambunctious.  Every time he turned around someone was coming to him with a tale of what Charlie had done.  He loved his son, and wanted him to grow up to be a good man, but he just didn’t know how to make that happen.  The boy needed a mother, but he didn’t want a wife.  There had to be some way to compromise.

*****

While they were cooking supper together that evening, Millie asked Patience if she’d talked to Mr. Walker.  “Yes, I did.  He’s a strange man.  He always seems to be either laughing at me or angry with me.  I swear, I thought he was going to burst out
laughing while I was apologizing.”

Millie hid her grin. 
“Do you feel better after apologizing?”

“You know, I’m not really sure.  I mean, I’m glad I did it, because it was the right thing to do, but the way he reacted left me feeling strange about the whole situation.”  She shrugged.  “I did the right thing, though, and that’s what matters.  Right?”
  Patience had never felt at such a loss with a school situation before.  She’d had no trouble handling everything that came along with aplomb, because she knew all the families so well.  Having a child she didn’t know, and a parent she didn’t know how to approach, was making her question her capabilities of doing a good job teaching.

Millie squeezed her shoulder.  “Right.  I’m glad you talked to him.”
 

“I hope he talks to Charlie and school is easier tomorrow.”
  She sighed heavily.  “I’m not going to count on it, though.  The man is so persnickety.  I never know what he’ll say or do.”

“If not, school is almost out for the term.  It’s already April.  Maybe you’ll learn some patience over the summer.”
 

“I’m certainly going to try.”
  Patience’s mind was on Charlie and his father as she set the table.  She found herself thinking about the two of them a lot lately.

Patience walked to school ahead of her brothers and sisters every morning, because it was her job to start the fire in the stove that would keep them warm throughout the day.  It was April, and it was already warming nicely, but the temperature was still in the low fifties in the mornings, and the children would shiver through the morning without the fire.

After taking care of the chore, she noticed she had forgotten to sweep on Friday afternoon.  It was usually the last thing she did before leaving for the day, but because she was so angry, it had completely slipped her mind.  By the time she’d finished sweeping, her pupils were arriving.

They dropped their things in the cloak room and ran outside to take advantage of the playtime before she called them into school.  She had about ten minutes before it was time
to start, so she sat down and wrote out the lesson for the older students on the board.  She was going to have them write essays about why education was important.  The idea had come to her Friday afternoon, and she wanted to see what her pupils would make of it.