Tempted (9 page)

She knew that.

But she couldn't stop them.

“
Lila, what's the matter, girl?
Why are you crying. And those tears... they're...
oh... my...
God...
”

He gasped, and his whole face paled as he
took in her true nature.

“
My Gehove,” she
whispered.

Shock shot through her as the words left her
lips and the reality resounded in her brain. She didn't know how it
had happened. But she'd completed her assignment. He lay back
stunned and incapacitated.

She kissed his lips. She hoped he could hear
her when she said the words. “I'm so sorry, Uvall. I had no
choice.”

She lay at his side, clutching him to her,
her arms wrapped around his head in a tight embrace, as her wings
regrew steadily on her back. It was agony as the ribs formed and
the feathers forced their way through. She screamed in pain,
muffling the noise by biting down hard on her bare knuckles.

As the initial fiery pain of their growth
subsided, she left the comforting warmth of his body, desperately
trying to distance herself from him.

She stood and carefully dressed him in his
pants.

The sight of Uvall, this great demon lying
prone, immobile, at her mercy, and so very vulnerable, caught at
her heart painfully. She couldn't breathe. She lay down on the bed
next to him and kissed him goodbye. Every inch of his beautiful
face, which would never see this world again, she bathed with
kisses. Her red tears flowed like a river. She had no idea why she
felt such an ache for him.

Was it purely his drug of seduction? Was it
his looks? Was it his beguiling eyes? Was it simply her hunger for
a man's touch?

She felt not. It was a connection. They had
a deeper connection. Somehow, an angel and a demon had found
something they wanted in each other. It was the most adverse of
couplings. A bizarre oddity. But all the same, the most beautiful
experience of her life. Being with him these last few hours had
been better than any human relationship she'd ever had. It was
hard, heady, raw, base, intense, tender and all of it so deeply
touching. He'd given her everything of himself. And she'd given all
of herself to him. And she hadn't just given him her body, it had
been more than that. Much more.

She wished she'd known more of what he
planned for the world of men. The depth of his darker side. He
obviously had one or else he wouldn't be in Hell. But although she
knew this, she'd also seen, that it was not necessary to be that
wicked, to find yourself in hell. Poor Selena hadn't been that
wicked and she'd been cast there. Lila herself would have been sent
there if it wasn't for Gehove's plan.

Didn't the fact that Gehove had used me this
way, mean he had an evil streak too?

He seemed to be evil minded when he spoke of
letting Uvall die on his altar, agonizingly slowly, through his
neglect. She felt there was more to this situation with Uvall, than
merely giving the two finger sign to the devil. She knew Gehove had
history with Uvall, as Castilla had mentioned it in passing,
although she didn't know the story behind it, she'd heard there was
one.

Lila was beginning to wonder how she was
being used. Why didn't Gehove send the Avenging angels after Uvall?
Three of them would have been enough to ensure his death. The
Avenging angels were highly trained in swordsmanship. He could have
been put to death with no drama and with great speed. Or they could
have captured him much the same as she had. Not with seduction, but
with force.

The fact she was here, doing this, had more
to it than she knew. Gehove wanted Uvall to die in a way that made
him no martyr. In a way that made him undesirable to the devil,
maybe? He'd failed because of a woman; one who was half angel at
that. She wasn't sure how the devil would see it in his bigger
picture. Or even if she was barking up the wrong tree. She was
conjecturing and surmising. She didn't have all the facts at her
disposal, and that could be a dangerous thing.

But whatever she felt, she had done it now.
She had him ready for handing over. She dressed. As best she could
in her tube dress, now that her wings were fully grown.

She placed the flat of her hand on the
window and summoned her lightning to break the glass. It shattered
into a million little pieces, just like her heart.

Then she gathered him up in her arms. Lila
was strong. She was a seraph. Uvall was no weight for her to carry,
despite his size. She kissed his lips once more, looking into his
eyes, open and staring, and now pitch black, looking very much the
demon he was. Clutching him tightly to her, she walked back and
took a run through the open space into the hot night air beyond.
Her wings flapped and she soared toward the Gates of Heaven, a
place she knew very well. She soared faster than the speed of light
and landed in a short minute at her destination.

Two male seraph, whose names she couldn't
recall, rushed to greet her.

“
Lila, you have done well, so
very well,” one of them said, kissing her cheek,
enthusiastically.

But although she smiled at him, she didn't
feel good in any way. It was a hollow victory to her.

Her heart was broken.

They took Uvall from her, literally
wrenching him from her as she kept a fake smile on her face. Her
whole self protested at the loss of his presence in her arms.

She couldn't speak with distress, as the
Seraph left abruptly, anxious to take his evil prize to Gehove. Her
heart hurt so badly constricting in her chest she felt sick with
the pain.

The last view she saw of him was of his long
dark hair; hair she had run her hands through only a short time
ago, as he'd made wonderful love to her. Now it was hanging loosely
over the seraph's arm, swinging like a beautiful black curtain, as
they flew him up the steps and disappeared into the light.

She collapsed on the steps to Heaven and
cried her heart out.

She cried for hours, until he was gone from
her heart. Gone from her mind. And gone from her life. Then, with a
slow and painful ascent. She walked up the steps to Heaven. Each
step was agony as it brought her closer to her source of pain. But
she would have to live with and bear that pain.

She worked on her self convictions. Telling
herself what she had to, in order to survive this terrible deed she
had committed.

She was seraph. She was strong. She had to
do the right thing. She had to obey the command of God. Uvall was
evil. He had drugged and seduced her. He was not worthy of her
affection. She had no right to feel anything for a monster such as
he. The monster who was now enslaved by Gehove. He was where he
belonged. At the point where he would face his reckoning.

And it was out of her hands.

She sat in her favorite field watching blue
butterflies flutter in the sun. Castilla arrived in a swirl of gray
and a patter of her tiny feet to her side.

“
I'm not in the mood for a
chat,” Lila said, snapping at her.

“
What's the matter, Lila? You've
been sitting here for nearly two days.”

“
I'm not moving until he's
dead.” She knew her pain wouldn't go, until he was
finished.

“
I don't understand. This is a
great coup, is it not? The underworld are simply furious. Bael is
apparently beyond the pale.”

“
I don't give a shit what he
thinks,” she snarled.

“
Lila, stop this ridiculous
mood. Get up.” Castilla lost her patience with her a little and
raised her voice as if she were a naughty child.

She reluctantly stood, folding her arms and
glaring at her, all her wild, bad, hopeless and confused feelings
bubbling up to the surface.

Why can't I stop thinking about him. It's
torture...his eyes, his smile, the touch of his hand on my
skin...and the suffering he is feeling now, because of what I've
done...

“
You are coming with me. Let us
see Uvall together. Let us gaze upon the face of evil and watch his
suffering in the realms of the good and holy.”

Lila erupted, in a spitting
fury. “
I
fucking well won't.
And you know something? I'm beginning to feel very
uncomfortable being here, in such a good and holy place... where
angels are cast down for next to no reason, where we have to do as
we are told every second of our lives, and where beautiful
creatures are murdered on altars while we stand by and watch them,
smiling.”

Castilla's eyes opened wide
with confused shock. “Do you have some kind of brain fever? Are you
ill from your trip to the surface?
What is going on in your
head
?”
Castilla snapped at her. “Look,
madam
, tomorrow is your ceremony. The day you become
seraphim. You will see Uvall,
the demon
, then. You will take credit for your good deed
and you will behave in a manner befitting an angel from now on. Do
I make myself clear?”

“
Crystal clear,” she snapped.
“Now leave me be.”

Castilla stood with her hands on her hips.
“You are so moody. I'll be pleased when you lose all that.
Humankind is so weak, and so emotional. Good riddance to Lila the
human. I shall welcome Lila the seraph with much more enthusiasm.”
Her eyes were burning with anger.

Lila felt a such guilt at upsetting her. It
wasn't her fault. It was his. Her Lord Gehove. The good and holy
Lord whom Castilla worshipped and adored with everything she
had.

Without another word, she flew away,
creating a tornado of wind from her angry wings.

Lila wandered to her space in the physical
realm. The small room where she slept and where she kept her gowns
and slippers. These were all she owned. Nothing of any consequence
really. As she stroked the fabric of her gowns, she knew without a
doubt she had no desire to be an angel. But she had no choice. She
had even less desire to burn in Hell or be living dust forever, and
they were the only the options available to her.

She brushed her hair of its windswept
tangles, mindlessly, then wandered outside feeling very unsettled
in herself.

The lights of Hailen beckoned to her.

She flew to the square and to the Wall of
Souls. Dusk was falling and the sea swelled beautifully, shimmering
with a fluorescent blue hue. It made her smile a little, which was
good.

She couldn't help but look across the space
behind her. She could see the torches burning outside God's chapel.
The place where Uvall lay.

Her feet started walking toward him. She
didn't want to go, or to see, but was possessed to get closer.

She faltered at the door, where the two
seraph guards stood by. They bowed to her.

“
Is he still alive?” she
inquired, casually. Her small smile belied her distress.

She was hoping, beyond all hope that he was
dead and gone and his suffering was over. She couldn't bear to
think of him suffering in agony and her part in it.

“
Yes, and he will be alive for a
few days yet. But his change has begun.”

Her stomach churned with nausea.

It was to take that long? Days more
suffering, dying of thirst and pain wracking his beautiful
body?

“
That's excellent news. He's
turning to wood, is he?” she said, as if unconcerned, swallowing
the bile that had arisen in her throat.

“
Parts of him, yes. You want to
go in and see? It is a peculiar thing to observe.”

“
If I can, I would be most
interested, yes please. I want to look upon the face of evil and
count my blessings. And I shall pray a while, for all of us, in
these times of trouble.”

“
Take all the time you like,
Lila. You are most deserving of watching his demise.”

She hadn't intended to go in, or to look
upon his tortured face alone, but she decided in that moment, that
she should face him now. It would be better than the shock of
seeing him tomorrow, in a more advanced form of decay.

He unlocked the heavy door for her and she
stepped into the gloom. There were candles lighting the aisle. The
arched ceilings were flickering with shadows, eerily, as she
approached the form on the altar table ahead.

She arrived silently at his side.

Her heart lurched and broke again at what
she saw.

A sob bubbled up in her throat and she
gulped it down.

He lay naked and chained. His neck, wrists
and ankles were bloodied from where he'd been struggling to escape.
A piece of dirty cloth was laid upon his loins for modesty. His
hair was a mess, and lay across his face. And parts of him had deep
grooves scoring his flesh. Wooden grooves, like the bark of an
ancient oak.

Her sob burst forth as she looked at him in
horror. She had done this to him.

She was no better than a murderess. A sick
and disgusting murderess.

His mouth opened a little as he sensed
someone was nearby.

“
Please,” he whispered in a weak
and faint voice. “Finish me.”

Tears stung her eyes, as they poured down
her face and splashed on the floor. His eyes opened. The blue had
returned and they shone like sapphires, glinting in the semi
darkness. She stood there, in her mental torment, looking at him
suffering, in his physical one.

She bent and kissed his lips and they moved
silently forming her name.

“
Lila?”

“
Yes, Uvall, I'm
here.”

“
Why did you do this?” he asked,
his eyes blurry and dazed.