Ten Things We Did (And Probably Shouldn't Have) (11 page)

“Oh, that’s hot!” she cried, lifting herself partially back out.
“Ahhh,”
she said eventually, sliding back in.

“You know,” Vi commented, “I’ve never been blackmailed before.”

“Me neither,” I said.

“I always thought that it would happen eventually,” Vi said, “but I assumed it would be for having an illicit affair.”

“You’re having an illicit affair?” Lucy asked.

Vi put her hand in front of Lucy’s mouth. “I said you could get in. I did not say you could talk.”

“Vi! Be nice,” I said. If all Creepy Lucy wanted was to hang out with us, we could make that happen. At least she wouldn’t rat us out.

“Fine,” Vi said. “But can we all just be quiet and appreciate the hot tub?”

I dipped my head back, looked up at the sky, and for the first time in months, felt myself truly relax.

I BET KOBE KNEW WHAT DAY IT WAS

The Monday before the big V-Day weekend—and yes, when I said V-Day, I meant V-Day—I hinted at my plan. We were standing by Noah’s locker, and he was fiddling with his combination.

“So,” I said. “You know what this weekend is, don’t you?”

“The NBA All-Star Game?” he asked.

“Ha, ha, ha.”

“Sunday at four. Why?”

He was kidding. He had to be. I stepped closer, twined my fingers through his, and said, “Okay . . . but do you have something planned for Saturday?”

“All-Star Saturday Night.”

“Huh?”

“The slam dunk contest.”

I stared at him, willing him to tell me he was joking.

Did he really not remember? I’d been planning and waiting and working on the details for the last three weeks (Pills every night! Sex playlist! Exfoliating!), and he didn’t have a clue? “It’s Valentine’s Day,” I said pointedly.

“I knew that,” he said, nodding. “I mean, I knew it was coming up but I didn’t realize it was . . . well, this Saturday.”

“February fourteenth,” I said. “Every year.” He was acting like a weirdo, and it was making my stomach clench. “It’s also been a month.”

“A month from what?”

He was definitely kidding me. Here I was planning sex and he . . . barely remembered?

“A month since my trip to the doctor.” A month since my boobs, hips, and tummy had begun expanding from the ingested hormones.

He blinked. “So . . . Saturday’s the big night?”

“If you want to.” I crossed my arms. He was ruining it. I didn’t want to help him by growing pouty, but I was having a hard time fighting it.

“Of course I want to. Why wouldn’t I want to?” He looked at me all wide-eyed.

Why wouldn’t he want to? Of course he wanted to. Breathe, April. Breathe.

“So you’ll come over? And tell your parents you’re sleeping at RJ’s?”

“I don’t know if I can do that on Valentine’s Day. They’d get suspicious. They already think it’s weird that . . .” He trailed off.

“That what?”

“That you live with someone else’s family.”

My stomach felt queasy. I thought it was weird that I lived with another family too. But that didn’t mean I wanted Noah’s parents thinking about it.

“Hey, come here,” he said, pulling me into him. “So this weekend, huh?”

“This weekend,” I said.

“I can’t wait.”

I closed my eyes and let my cheek rest against his shirt.

THE REAL JAKE BERMAN REMEMBERED

From: Jake Berman

Date: Tues, 10 Feb, 6:31 a.m.

To: Suzanne Caldwell

Subject: Valentine’s Day

Suzanne,

Wondering if you could do me a favor . . . when April was a little girl I always used to leave a chocolate heart under her pillow for Valentine’s Day. Do you think you could do that for me? Much appreciated.

Best, Jake

Sent From BlackBerry

_______

From: Suzanne Caldwell

Date: Wed, 11 Feb, 4:40
P.M.

To: Jake Berman

Subject: RE: Valentine’s Day

Dear Jake,

Consider it done.

All the very best,

Suzanne

DON’T GET TOO COMFY

“What are you guys doing tonight?” Lucy asked, accosting me before calculus on Thursday morning.

“Homework,” I told her. “I have an English paper to write.”

She looked at me suspiciously.

“She does,” Marissa said. I’d told her about Lucy’s midnight stalker episode, so she knew Lucy was now, um, part of the family. “Swear. We’re in the same class.”

“So when can I come over again?” Lucy asked.

“The next time we have a party,” I told her. I really did have an English paper due. But anyway, Vi and I had decided that Lucy could come to all our soirées, but that we didn’t want her hanging around all the time. There was something off about her. “You will one hundred percent be invited, promise.”

“When’s the next party?” she asked, crossing her arms. “This weekend?”

“Not this weekend,” I told her. “Definitely not this weekend. We’re kind of spontaneous. But whenever it is, you will be invited. I’ll text you.”

“You don’t have to text me,” she said. “I’ll know.”

“Remind me to check the cactus for a camera,” I mumbled to Marissa.

THE LEOPARD’S SPOTS

“So you’re absolutely positive you want to do this on a Friday the thirteenth?” I asked.

“Too late now,” Vi said, blow-drying. “He’s on his way over.”

“It’s not too late until the fat lady . . .” I put my hand on my hip. “Why would the fat lady sing?”

She flipped her hair and shrugged. “It’s from the opera.”

I sat on her bed and stretched out. The water moved beneath my body. “You don’t think Friday the thirteenth is a bad omen?”

“No. I think it’s funny.”

“If we were in a horror movie you would get hacked to death right after you have sex.”

“Oh, hush. Are you sure you’re not just trying to stop me because you want to go first?”

I pulled her duvet over my legs. “Why would I care that you’re going first?”

“You’ve been with Noah for a long time. It seems like you should go first.”

“You’re older. You should go first. You do everything first.”

She considered. “True.”

Vi had kissed a boy first. Vi had gotten her period first. Vi had gotten drunk first. Vi lived with one parent first. Vi was the trailblazer. Vi was gutsy. No matter what Hudson said, I was the follower.

“So you’re not nervous?” I asked.

“No. I’m excited.”

“But Dean is your best friend. What if sex . . . changes that?”

She shook her head. “It won’t. It’s not going to change anything for me. I’ll still think of him as a best friend. And what’s the worst that it does to him? Make him want to have sex with me all the time? He already wants to have sex with me all the time.”

“But it could change the dynamic of the friendship.”

“Not if I don’t let it. You
can
control these things.”

“You can’t control everything,” I said.

She smiled. “I can try.”

“And you’re sure you don’t want to wait to be in love? Wait for the lightning?”

“The what?”

“You know—the lightning. The omigod, I’m in love.”

“No. I don’t. Cheeseball.” She rolled her eyes. “So what are you doing tonight? Going out with Noah?”

“No, he has a game in Ridgefield. Marissa and I are going to see a movie about a girl who loses her virginity on Friday the thirteenth and then gets hacked to death.”

“Have fun. We should be done by the time you get back.”

“Do you think he’ll stay over?”

She rolled her eyes. “Of course not! It’s not about cuddling. It’s about doing it.”

“What if Dean
wants
to stay over?” Unlike Noah. No, that wasn’t fair. Noah wanted to. He just couldn’t.

“He can sleep on the couch. Or in my mom’s room.”

“What if he wants to sleep in your bed with you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear?”

She purposefully ignored me.

“So he has no idea what’s about to happen?” I asked.

“I told him we needed to work on our economics project tonight.”

“On a Friday night?”

She waved her hands in the air. “He has no clue. I always tell him what he has to be working on. Honestly, I run his life. If he wasn’t in my homeroom he would fail out of school.”

“So he thinks he’s coming over to work on a project and instead . . .”

“Instead we’re going to have sex.”

“But . . . what if he doesn’t want to have sex?” I asked.

She snorted. “Of course he does. He’s a guy.”

I left her to prepare for her night, trying not to think about the fact that Noah seemed almost uninterested in sex. Was he no longer into me? Was he into someone else?

When the doorbell rang twenty minutes later, I waited for Vi to get it but she was blow-drying and couldn’t hear.

“Hey, Dean, what’s up?” I wasn’t sure if I should look at him or not. Kind of bizarro that I knew what was about to happen and he didn’t.

“Hey,” he said. He was carrying his schoolbag. “Hope you’re up to something more fun than we are tonight.”

Doubtful. “Just going to see a movie with Marissa. Leaving now actually. Let me go tell Vi you’re here.”

I knocked on Vi’s door and then stuck my head in. Vi was wearing a plunging brown-and-black leopard leotard that tied up the front.

“That is not from Victoria’s Secret,” I said. “That’s from Victoria’s Sluts.”

“It’s actually from the drugstore. It was right next to the condoms. What, I don’t look hot? You wouldn’t sleep with me?”

“Shush, he’s here,” I said, motioning with my head. “You look very hot. But I thought sleeping with your friend meant you wouldn’t have to try so hard.”

“This isn’t trying,” she said. “This is me having fun. I’m not giving up the opportunity to wear leopard spots.”

“Nice setup,” I said, looking around. The music was playing and she was clearly ready to rock. Or at least crawl on the floor and hunt gazelles. “Should I send him into the leopard’s den? Or are you gonna Hula first?”

“Send him in,” she said, dimming the lights. “I’m ready.”

I closed the door behind me and then waved at Dean, who was on the couch. “She’s all yours.” I laughed to myself. “Good luck.” I stepped into my shoes and grabbed my coat, and watched as he lazily walked away from me and toward her room. I wished I could see the reaction on his face when he opened the door. I stood on my tiptoes trying to watch. Door was opening . . . opening . . . opening. . . .

“Holy shit,” I heard.

I left the house, giggling. I hoped she wouldn’t eat him alive.

THE LIGHTNING

When I was ten, I’d asked my dad how he’d known my mom was the one for him. He’d proposed after five dates—they’d only known each other a month.

“Lightning only strikes once,” my dad said. “And when it hits, you know.”

OUT ON THE TOWN

“So are you sure you want to do it?” Marissa asked. We were sitting in the theater sharing popcorn, waiting for the previews. We really
were
at a horror movie, but it was about werewolves, not girls losing their virginity.

“I like scary movies,” I said.

“Not about the movie, silly. About tomorrow night.”

How many times did we have to have the same conversation? I popped a kernel into my mouth. “Yeah.”

“But what if it’s a mistake?”

I turned to her. “Why would it be a mistake?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know.”

“I guess I won’t know till after,” I said, and laughed.

“Once you do it, it’s too late to go back,” she said seriously.

“I get it,” I told her. “Why are you being weird?”

“I’m not,” she said quickly. “I just want to make sure you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” I said again. “I’ll call you afterward. Let you know if I’m still sure.”

“What, from under the covers?”

“No, when he
leaves
. Or the next morning.”

The lights in the theater dimmed. “Okay,” she said. “I’m here for you. No matter what.”

“Thanks, Marissa. Truly. I’ll give you the full report.”

“Promise?” she asked.

I thought of my mom. “Promise.”

WHY I THOUGHT OF MY MOM

I promised my mother that I would tell her before I had sex. This was before Noah, before she moved to France, before the divorce even. We were in her bed, under the covers watching something on TV. I don’t remember what, but it was something that had to do with teenagers and sex, which is how the subject came up.

“It’s very important,” she said, playing with my hair. “When you’re thinking about it, I want you to call me.”

“Mo-ooom.”
I knew I was bright red.

“You pick up the phone and call me. Promise me, April.”

The idea of me having sex—or sex at all—had been foreign at the time. Like Europe or getting my license.

“I promise,” I said.

VI GETS HACKED TO DEATH. KIDDING.

I turned the key in the lock and opened the door extra loudly. Just in case they were in the living room doing something that might scar my retinas.

“Hello?” I asked carefully.

The TV was on and Vi and Dean were sprawled across the couch. Vi was wearing a tank top and her yoga pants. They were both laughing at something on the screen. “Hey!” Vi called to me. “How was the movie?”

“Scary,” I said, leaving my boots in a pile by the door. “How was . . . your night?”

“Pretty good,” Dean said. “I think we’ll get an A.”

Vi laughed hysterically and kicked his foot.

His hand was on her shoulder. “That was the best economics project I’ve ever worked on.”

I wasn’t sure what I should say and what I shouldn’t.

“He knows you know,” Vi said, still staring at the TV.

“Ah.”

“I told him about our plan. About
my
plan,” she clarified.

“Best plan
ever
,” Dean added.

“We’re going to hit Hula,” Vi said. “Wanna come?”