Tender Love (12 page)

“I'm Eddie Tanner—you know me.”

The doctor laughed and lifted Eddie to the examination bench. “Well, you could have fooled me—all brown and brawny. You look great, Eddie. What have you been doing?”

“We've been to Alice's farm—I rode the pony,
drove the tractor and played with the puppies. And Alice let us bring one of the puppies home.” The doctor's glance shifted to Alice, a speculative expression in his eyes. “We take walks every day, too, and before school starts, we're going to the beach.” A cloud filtered across Eddie's eyes. “Are you going to let me go to school?”

“I don't see why not. If a boy can drive a tractor, he ought to make it through kindergarten.”

The doctor examined Eddie thoroughly and sent him for several X-rays. While they waited for the results of the tests, Mark suggested, “Let's go to the coffee shop for a snack. I'm anxious about the tests, and I'll get fidgety if we just sit and wait.”

Mark had a doughnut and coffee, Alice ordered cola and Eddie wanted ice cream.

“I've cleared it with my boss,” Mark said, “and I'll come to the beach for a few days.”

“That's good, Daddy. You can play with me in the ocean.”

“It will be more enjoyable for all of us if you're there, Mark.” Alice's eyes conveyed more of a message than her words. “It will be good for you, too—even a couple of nights at the farm was relaxing for you.”

“As soon as we return from the beach, we'll need to buy school clothes,” he said.

“Do you want me to take care of it or will you go along when we shop?”

“You can buy some things if you'd like, but I want to go with you if we can find a good time—perhaps we can shop on Saturdays or in the evenings? There I go again, monopolizing your weekends and evenings! Forgive me, Alice.”

“Do you think I'm unhappy at the way things are going?”

“You don't seem to be.”

“Alice likes to look after us, don't you?” Eddie said, as he licked the last spoonful of ice cream from his dish. “You, too, Daddy—she tries to fix food you like, and when Kristin and me start fighting, she says, ‘Stop this quarreling before your father comes home—I don't want you to worry him.' She likes you, Daddy.”

Alice's face flushed. How much longer could she keep up this pretense of being a nanny in the Tanner home? She loved Mark and his children—and she wanted to be so much more to them than a nanny. She must go and visit Betty soon and let Betty's caustic remarks cause her to face the true facts.

No doubt, aware of Alice's discomfiture, Mark devoted his attention to Eddie, and didn't look at her. “It's a good thing for us that she does like the Tanners, Son.” He wiped Eddie's face with a napkin. “Let's go see what Dr. Zane says about you.”

Dr. Zane's face was beaming when he received them in his office. “The news couldn't be better, Mark. We've been through so much together with Eddie, that I rejoice with you. He's gained nine pounds in the past year, and while he still isn't as big as a boy his age should be, that's a vast improvement over his previous record.”

Eddie's eyes sparkled at Alice, as if to remind her of the nine dollars she owed him.

“That's the best news you could have given me,” Mark said, and his blue eyes were misty. “The majority of the credit goes to Alice—she's done wonders with the children since she's been with us.”

Dr. Zane turned to Alice. “Whatever you've been doing—keep it up. Apparently you're the antidote that Eddie needs.”

“So Eddie can start to school?” Mark asked.

“Yes, of course. You do need to realize that even though his heart problem is completely cured, he will be subject to other diseases. Because of Eddie's long illness, his constitution is weak, and he may contact minor bugs more easily than other children. You'll need to watch him closely.”

“Doctor,” Alice said, “we've discussed enrolling the children in riding lessons this fall. I assume that will be beneficial to them.”

“Yes, and keep up the daily walks. Don't take Eddie out in extremely cold weather, for we don't want any respiratory problems, but he's doing great.”

W
hen they left Mark at the bank, Alice handed Eddie a five-dollar bill and four ones. “Do you want to spend some of the money before we go home? It might be a good idea to buy something for Kristin, too.”

Alice stopped at a used bookstore, where Eddie chose a book on dinosaurs for himself, and a book about figure skating for his sister. When they got home, Alice said, “Let's have a celebration for Eddie's good report. If you kids will help, we'll set the table in the dining room for dinner, have candles on the table and everything.”

Alice had discovered that Clarice had a beautiful set of English china, elegant crystal and sterling silver flatware. With some hesitancy, after she carefully washed the items she wanted for the table, while she shined the silver, she allowed Eddie and Kristin to dry the dishes and place them on the table, which she'd covered with a white polyester cloth. This re
sulted in having the napkins and silverware slightly askew, but the table did look festive.

She baked chicken breasts, cooked rice, green limas and prepared a salad. She still had time to bake a pie, and she made a chocolate cream pie—knowing that chocolate was Eddie's favorite flavor. The ice cream he'd had for lunch had been low-cal, so he could have a treat tonight.

Eddie and Kristin waited in the foyer for Mark, and they pounced on him as soon as he arrived.

“Come see the dining room, Daddy—we're celebrating Eddie's good report. It was Alice's idea.”

Alice's happiness was complete when they sat at the table, en famille, and Mark said, with an apologetic cough, “Let's join hands and have a blessing before we eat.

“Dear Lord,” he said, after a few false starts, “We have much to thank You for tonight. We always have had, but sometimes we failed to realize it. We're grateful for Eddie's good report today, thank You for Kristin, who's all a man could want in a daughter, thanks for Gran and her encouraging presence with us, and God, thank you for Alice. Guide us in Your love. Amen.”

It was a festive occasion, with Eddie excited because he could start school, but so much attention was being paid to Eddie, that Kristin seemed unusually quiet. Alice had always suspected that she'd been neglected by her parents during Eddie's serious illness.

Trying to think of a way to give the girl some attention, she said, “Say, Kristin, I just had a thought. Would you like to have a sleepover for some of your friends before we go to the beach?”

“I've never had a sleepover,” she said, but her face brightened. “When Mama was sick, Daddy didn't want me to.”

“And that was right, too, but there's no reason you can't have your friends in for overnight now, if you'd like to. Okay, Mark?”

“That'll be fine. I suppose Eddie and I can survive one night with the house full of girls. How about it, Eddie?”

His mouth was full of chicken, but Eddie nodded his head in agreement.

“Then that's settled. Decide upon the ones you'd like to invite, Kristin, and I'll call their mothers after we agree on a date,” Alice said.

“Is it all right if I tell Susie tonight?”

“Of course.” Alice pushed back her chair. “If you want to help clear the table and carry everything into the kitchen, I'll take care of the rest of the work. I'm going to wash the crystal and china by hand—I don't want to trust it to the dishwasher.”

“I'll dry for you,” Mark said. “The crystal and china belonged to Clarice's mother, and it will be Kristin's someday.”

“Then we'll be very careful with them. Perhaps I shouldn't have used it tonight, but I wanted it to be a special evening.”

“It has been special, and a good time to use our fancy things. We've always used them when we had a celebration.”

The children carried in a few items, and then headed for the family room—Eddie to watch television, and Kristin to telephone her friend. Gran wended her way slowly and painfully up the stairs, and Alice watched her slow progress.

“I don't know how much longer she can manage those steps. She should have a bedroom downstairs.”

“When she came here, I offered to move my office and let her have that room. It isn't much smaller than her bedroom, but she refused, thinking it was better for her to exercise by climbing the steps a few times each day. When we move, I'll try to find a house with a downstairs bedroom.”

“Have you done anything more about that yet?”

“No, the loan officer is checking my options, but I haven't had time to look at any more houses. The bank pays me well, and in return, the officers expect a lot of work from me, but I'm not complaining.”

As they worked companionably, Alice realized how much like man and wife they were, and she wondered if Mark was conscious of the same thing. Oh, if it could be! She believed that both she and Mark were ready for marriage, and that they would make a compatible couple. But what about the children—they accepted her readily as a nanny, but would they want her to take their mother's place? And Gran—how would she react if Mark took another wife? How long would she expect him to be faithful to Clarice's memory?

“Thanks, Mark,” she said as she took the dish towel from him and hung it to dry.

“Thank you for all you do for us—the celebration dinner, Kristin's sleepover. You're giving us a home life that we've not had for a long time.”

He stood too close for her comfort, and Alice replied lightly, “All in a day's work—for a nanny.”

“Have it your own way, but you go way beyond what any nanny is expected to do, and I do appreciate it.” He put his arm around her shoulders and gave
her a brotherly hug, then his hands fell helplessly to his side.

“I feel so inadequate to—” His words were interrupted when Eddie called, “Daddy, come and read to me out of my new book.”

Mark shrugged his shoulders. “See what I mean. Maybe the two of us can go out for dinner some night—just so we can have a little time alone,” he said lowly.

Alice shook her head. “No, Mark—it isn't wise.”

“I know that, but it's so frustrating at times. At least, don't shut me out of your life completely. When you go to your room in the evening and shut the door, it seems as if you're building a wall between us.”

“The wall is already there—we have to accept it. Right now, Eddie and Kristin need all the security you can give them. I'm with them all day, and they need their father's influence at night.”

“Daddy,” Eddie called.

Mark started down the hall. “We used to sit on the patio and talk.”

She shook her head. “We have to be cautious. Our situation is all right now, but I can't handle much more ‘togetherness.'”

 

The sleepover was set for the Thursday night before they left for the beach on Saturday. Kristin invited five girls. When she gave Alice their names, Alice put in a call to the parents. All the invitations were accepted.

“Could we have a cookout? And what about renting some videos? Eddie will want to stay in the fam
ily room with us, but I don't want him. Little brothers can be a pest.”

“I wouldn't know—I've never had a brother—but I'll keep Eddie occupied. I'll rent a game for him to play on my computer.”

“He and Daddy can watch television in Eddie's room.”

Alice had noticed that Kristin was jealous of the time Eddie spent in her room. “That can be an option, but we'll look out for Eddie, so he won't crash your party.”

 

Mark's homecoming was always the same. He'd enter the house and greet his children, who were usually in the family room, or sometimes in the foyer watching for him. Then, he'd come down the hallway to where Alice was busy in the kitchen. If she'd been his wife, he would have kissed her after a long day's absence, but as a nanny, all she received was, “Hello. How's your day been?”

On the night before Kristin's party, she sensed a difference in him—an excitement—indicated by his rapid steps and his brief greeting to his children. Usually he leaned against the doorjamb of the kitchen, his tie and coat held in his hand. This night, he came into the kitchen where Alice was removing a meat-and-vegetable casserole from the oven. After he closed the oven door for her, he said quietly, “The most amazing thing happened today! I'm still in shock.”

Alice's hands moistened as she set the casserole on the kitchen table. Inwardly nervous, she smiled encouragingly. “Good news, I hope.”

“Wonderful. Somebody anonymously paid thirty thousand dollars on my house loan today.”

“That
is
good news, Mark.”

“The best. I tried to find out where the money came from, but the bank officials don't know. It was handled secretively, but they've verified the authenticity of the loan, so it isn't a hoax.” He sat down at the table. “You can't imagine what a relief it is to me. I feel like a bum taking the money, and if I knew who did it, I'd refuse. I'm assuming that it's one of my former parishioners, but there's no way for me to find out.”

“I'm sure whoever donated the money wanted to do it anonymously or it wouldn't have been handled in this way. Just enjoy it, Mark. That's the only return your benefactor would want. Will this make a difference in your plans to move?”

“Oh, yes. If I have several months' grace on my house loan, I won't have any difficulty paying the rest of my bills, and I can do repairs around here that need to be done. It's wonderful to know that those debts have been canceled.”

“Does this person's generosity remind you of a spiritual application?”

He smiled. “It reminded me of a sermon text I often used. I like to preach from the Old Testament, and I referred often to a passage from the book of Joshua when I wanted to stress the grace of God, and how we could do nothing to deserve it. ‘I gave you a land on which you did not toil and cities you did not build; and you live in them and eat from vineyards and olive groves that you did not plant.'”

He paused thoughtfully, and Alice said, “That's a favorite verse of mine, too.” She often thought of
the words when she reaped the benefits of John Larkin's wealth.

“I'm not trying to justify myself for forsaking my vows to God,” Mark continued, “but my life has been in such an emotional turmoil that I couldn't face people from a pulpit. I needed help more than others, and I felt like a hypocrite to preach on how to trust God for all your needs when I couldn't follow my own advice. I almost stopped praying, but one day I cried out in despair, ‘God, I've given up—I don't know which way to turn. Send me a sign that You still love me.'”

Alice's hand gripped the chair back in front of her. One of the things she'd prayed for was coming to pass. Mark's hardened heart was opening to the leading of the Spirit.

“The day I prayed that, He sent you, Alice, and everything has improved since you came.” He waved his arm to encompass the house. “This place that was almost like a tomb for a couple of years has become a home again. My children are happy. I look forward to coming home in the evening, when before, I dreaded to walk through the door. Although I've thanked God for sending you to us, I can't thank you the way I want to, but consider yourself kissed.”

After she went to bed, Alice couldn't sleep, wondering if she'd made the right decisions about helping Mark financially. Was she putting him under such an obligation to her that he'd feel obliged to marry her, whether he wanted to or not? Would she be accused of buying a family? Could she keep her benevolence to Mark a secret? She felt as if she'd boxed herself into a corner without any means of escape.

For the sleepover, Kristin requested some special cookies that Alice had often made for the Tanner family, but she left the rest of the menu up to Alice. Since Alice had often attended parties for her sister's children, she knew what to prepare to make the girls happy. She cooked low-fat hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill, to be served with vegetable sticks, mixed fresh fruit, and coconut cream pie. For a snack, while they watched videos, she made a mixture of granola, dried fruit and nuts, and she had a good supply of fruit juices in the refrigerator.

Gran requested a tray in her room, and Mark carried it up while the others ate at the picnic table in the backyard. When the guests finished, Mark helped Alice bring the utensils and extra food into the kitchen, and left the girls to entertain themselves with active games and playing with Buffy. Alice put a video about the Creation into her television for Eddie to watch while she straightened the kitchen and made advance preparations for the girls' breakfast. Alice had rented a game for Eddie to play on the computer and she showed him how to operate it when the video ended. It was entertaining as well as educational. While they were still at the computer, Mark came to the door holding the newspaper in his hand.

“I can't find a place that isn't overrun by girls. May I join you?”

With a smile, so he'd know she was joking, Alice said, “Have you tried your office?”

“Yes, but it reminds me of the work I have to do. Besides, it's lonely in there.”

“You're welcome to join us. Take the rocking chair—I believe it came from your room anyway.”

When Eddie progressed until he could handle the
game by himself, Alice sat down on the bed and picked up her embroidery.

“Don't you want to sit here? I feel mean to take the only chair you have. We haven't made you very comfortable.” Mark looked around the room with distaste. “And there isn't any heat out here. Some other arrangements will have to be made before winter.” When she didn't answer, he said, “What're you doing?”

“Embroidering a tablecloth for my sister. I hope to have it finished before Christmas.”

“My mother does a lot of needlework, and so did Gran before she had the stroke,” Mark said.