She gaped at him for a long moment before she tried to speak, but nothing came out. Her mouth had dried up like a box of sand.
What was he doing? Just what exactly had she clicked into place when she’d been shifting his dark and light jigsaw pieces apart before?
“Darrak . . . I—I don’t know what to say. I’m surprised you’d ask me . . . this. It’s just, I . . .”
A shadow of doubt entered his expression. “It was stupid, wasn’t it?”
“No.” She gripped his hands. This was so unbelievably sweet and unexpected and . . . she didn’t know how to deal with this. A wistful sensation passed through her wishing things could be different than they were. Wishing they were remotely normal and could discuss things like this seriously. “Not stupid. Just not—Darrak, I . . . it’s just not something we should even be thinking about right now. There’s too much to deal with. I mean, at the very least you don’t even have a birth certificate. Or a driver’s license. And . . . and we’ve only known each other a month. One month!”
Clarity washed over his expression. “Forget I said anything.”
Her stomach twisted. “No, I don’t want to forget it. Just . . . maybe ask me again when things are better. But right now—you can’t honestly think this is a good time for this, do you? Besides, we have to go deal with Andy.” She glanced at the clock on her nightstand. “We really have to get moving right now.”
New clothes flowed over his skin, and he let her go completely. “Of course. Andy. I forgot about him for a minute there.”
Eden grabbed at the bedsheets to cover herself. She suddenly felt extremely naked. “Darrak, I mean it. We’ll talk about this later, I promise we will.”
He got up off the bed, averting his gaze. “No problem. I’m going to let you get ready. I’ll give you some privacy.”
He left the bedroom and the door closed behind him with a soft click.
It felt very quiet all of a sudden. She could even hear the pounding of her heartbeat in her ears, loud and fast.
Darrak had just asked her to marry him.
Marry him.
And she’d all but replied with a hell no. The last thing she wanted to do after all they’d been through was to hurt him, but what was she supposed to say? And what in the world had possessed him to ask her that in the first place? Had he really been inspired, of all things, by Stanley Dancy, minion to wizards and demons alike?
The full moon was making everyone go wild this month.
So, that couldn’t possibly have gone much worse than it did.
Darrak wished for a button to press that could undo the dumber things he attempted. It would have helped many times over the years.
This, quite possibly, had been the dumbest.
“Eden Riley, will you marry me?”
He covered his face with his hands. “What do I think this is?
The Bachelorette
?”
Sex didn’t normally make him lose his mind like that. First time for everything.
It was sort of humorous, actually. A cursed archdemon asking someone to be his wife in holy-freaking-matrimony. And the entire idea had been put into his mind in the first place by the romantic lothario Stanley, of all people.
Hilarious. Maybe someday he’d be able to laugh about it.
That day was not going to be today.
Fine. So the proof was in the proverbial pudding. He had sensed it all along, but now he knew for sure. What he felt for Eden was not returned in full. She cared about him, she lusted after him, she might even love him a little. But it wasn’t nearly the same as how he felt about her.
Point taken. He didn’t need any further embarrassment, thank you very much. He could take a hint when it hit him in the face with the force of a city bus.
He caught a glimpse of himself in the oval mirror attached to the wall. “This is what happens with all that angel inside of you. It’s turned you into a romantic dope.”
He was soft, sensitive, and making offers of marriage.
It was the beginning of the end, just as he’d predicted for himself.
Lucifer must have been laughing his ass off about his least favorite ex-employee. Darrak was nothing more than sentient hellfire with a soft side.
There were bigger issues to be concerned with at the moment; he knew that. Much, much bigger.
But still. How embarrassing.
TWELVE
Ben was getting better at lurking. Practice made perfect.
He currently lurked outside of Eden’s apartment building. He hadn’t been here for a while, but he was determined to do something now—something that would redeem him from his recent lousy decisions. He’d gone into everything with the Malleus because he wanted to save Eden from the demon who possessed her, and that was exactly what he’d do.
The only question was
how
.
Do this and everything goes back to normal.
Yeah. Unlikely at best, but it was a nice thought.
The chill in the air made him draw his coat closer. He’d been standing there staring at her building for nearly a half hour now trying to concentrate, but his mind kept going back to that shapeshifter.
Big trouble, that one. Her being locked up in a cage wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.
Still, something about her situation had struck him as wrong. She was locked in that cell because she had information Oliver wanted. She was also locked up because she was a shifter, since the Malleus deemed anything Other to be evil. Just like the police, the Malleus had rules and guidelines that governed their actions. They were trying to make the world a better, safer place.
He’d honestly believed that in the beginning.
“You look troubled.”
Ben glanced next to him with surprise. He hadn’t seen the man approach, now leaning against the car next to Ben’s. He was tall, with short messy brown hair and an ill-fitting suit that looked like it could use an ironing.
“Do I?” he replied.
“Definitely.”
“Who’re you?”
“Just a concerned citizen. I want to help you . . . if you want my help, that is.”
“You can help me? You don’t even know me.”
“I know enough, Ben. Enough to know you’re a good person who wants to do the right thing. Just like her.” The man nodded off to their left.
Ben was taken aback that this guy knew his name, but he turned to see that they weren’t alone in their survey of the apartment. There was a pretty, dark-haired young woman sitting in a Corvette nearby, her gaze fixed on the building.
“Who’s she?” Ben asked.
“Someone like you who’s looking for redemption. Her name’s Caroline. You two have a lot in common.”
“Like what?”
“You both care about the ultimate fate of Eden Riley.”
Ben tensed. “What do you know about Eden?”
“A fair amount.”
“Who are you?”
“A friend.”
“I don’t need any more friends.”
“No? Could have fooled me. Here I thought you currently have”—he cocked his head to the side—“exactly zero friends, right? At least ones you can count on in a pinch. You know what they say, a friend can help you move. A good friend can help you move a body. It’s all very true.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
He nodded toward the parked car. “You and Caroline should become friends. Together, I think you can help Eden. After all, that’s what you both want: to help her. And you both think you know how to do that.”
Ben took all this in. “She knows about . . . Darrak? Do
you
know about Darrak?”
“I can’t directly help you, but I can give you some advice if you want to hear it.”
“What do you want in return?”
“Nothing. Not from you, anyway.”
“Who the hell are you?” Ben demanded again.
The man’s expression didn’t change. He didn’t move closer. He just sat against the car’s hood and looked up at the building. “Like I said, a
friend
.”
“Whose friend?”
Finally the man cast a glance in his direction. “Do you want the advice I have to give you or not?”
Ben didn’t like not being in control. He didn’t like not having his questions answered. But at the end of the day he’d come here for one reason—to help Eden. And he currently had no damn idea how to go about that.
“Yes,” he said. “I want the advice.”
The man’s smile grew. “Somehow I just knew you were going to say that.”
A sense of foreboding followed Eden when she and Darrak left the apartment and headed toward her car. It passed, but it was unpleasant, like walking through a thatch of spiderwebs.
Darrak was trying to act like everything was fine, but she knew it wasn’t. She’d broken something between them—something she didn’t know was breakable.
Why did he have to go and ask her to marry him? Why now when there were a million other things to concern themselves with?
“So, did you buy a leash for our new puppy?” He was trying to make a joke as he got into the passenger side of her car, but his lips were tight as he smiled.
She put the key in the ignition and pulled out of her parking spot. “Didn’t get around to it. It’s on the list.”
“You don’t have to worry. Even if he’s a mindless, vicious werewolf, it’s only one night a month. We can contain him with that spell. Andy’s just lucky he has you looking out for him.”
She had Maksim’s containment spell tucked safety into her coat pocket. He said even a human could do it, so she didn’t think it would require her tapping into her black magic. She’d just have to read the incantation aloud when the time came and the office would be sealed up nice and tight until she decided to remove it again.
And according to the wizard it would also work as a cloaking spell, so no one who wandered past would see anything weird going on.
“Tomorrow I’m going to track Maksim down and we’ll see him again,” Darrak said. “There has to be some other options for us.”
“You really think so?”
“Sure. In the beginning, we thought it was only Selina that could help us, but now we know for sure that you share her magic. Just because the curse removal didn’t work the first time doesn’t mean that something else can’t be done to help us.”
“You sound so positive today.”
“That’s me. Sunshine to go.” A bitter smile stretched over his face. “It’s probably the angel half.”
She didn’t want to broach the subject, but it was still five minutes till they arrived at the office. She returned her attention to the road. “Lucas said that other demons would come after you if they found out. Maybe we can find a way to cloak you from them.”
As soon as the words left her mouth she regretted it.
“Oh?” Darrak said. “And when exactly did
Lucas
tell you this?”
She remembered her recent promise to tell Darrak the truth and not to keep anything back. Time to hold true to that. “When I touched the marble earlier, I saw him, but he sent me back so fast you never realized I was gone.”
There was silence in the car for a moment.
“Well, that was convenient, wasn’t it?” His gaze fell to her amulet. “Same color as before. Guess there wasn’t any tonsil hockey going on this time, was there?”
She looked at him sharply. “Sorry to disappoint.”
“What do you think would happen if you slept with him? Might suck the evil completely out of you.”
“Darrak, don’t go there.” Her tone held an edge of warning.
“I guess I understand the ‘let’s wait’ reply to my question now. Got to keep your options open in case a better offer comes in.”
“I swear to God, Darrak, stop it.”
He eyed her. “You swear to
God
? Why? Are you dating him, too?”
Anger rose in her throat, but she swallowed it down. “I know I hurt you—”
“You didn’t hurt me.” He waved a hand flippantly. “Just helped to put things back into perspective. I should thank you. Lesson learned.”
“Oh, what lesson is that?”
He hissed out a breath. “I don’t want to talk about this.” “That makes two of us.”
He turned his attention to the roadside swiftly moving past them. “Maybe if I wasn’t so connected to you, I’d be able to gather my balls back together and be less of an emotional basket case.” He snorted. “It’s funny, actually. I keep blaming myself for everything I’ve done to you—made you part evil, ruined your life, destroyed your immortal soul . . . I keep forgetting just how much you’ve messed me up in return.”
That hurt, but she couldn’t say he was wrong. Tears burned in her eyes, and she gave him a sideways glance as they pulled into the parking lot.
“Then I guess we’re even, aren’t we?”
He didn’t look directly at her. “Guess so.”
“So you hate me now, is that it?”
Darrak was silent for a moment before he laughed out loud. “I don’t hate you, Eden. I love you. But I get that that emotion isn’t returned in full. Let’s just forget about it and go deal with werewolf boy.”
He got out of the car, slammed the door behind him, and started walking to the front door of Triple-A.
Damn it. She so didn’t need this right now. Any of it.
If she had one wish at this very moment, she’d wish that she wasn’t bound to Darrak. At all. She needed her freedom, her space, her privacy.
She’d never asked for any of this to begin with. Who the hell would?
Darrak had given her unwanted black magic that put her soul at risk. He’d taken away any possibility for privacy. He was frustrating and vain and self-involved.
He was also funny and sexy and fiercely protective of her. She enjoyed his company. He challenged her, made her laugh, drove her crazy with desire. He was truly the best man she’d ever known. One she knew she could trust her secrets to.
And maybe her heart, too.
Something continued to hold her back. There were too many problems, obstacles, and challenges. How could she possibly allow herself to fall for him completely when they had so many issues to deal with on a daily basis?
She honestly had no idea. But right now she had to deal with Andy.
Eden marched into the office. Andy sat behind his desk looking oddly serene.
“Everything okay?” she asked.
Andy eyed the clock. “You know, the last time I checked, you still worked here. I know you’re not my employee, but we’re partners, right?”