The Accidental Witch (28 page)

I woke up next to Fred. It was very early and the first light of day was pushing its way through the blinds. I didn’t want to move or disturb Fred, so I nestled into my covers and watched the light move across the floor. I looked at my arms. I had always known I could be oblivious, but I didn’t know how oblivious I was until I realized I had a bright green tattoo on my forearm. It was a circle filled with symbols and an eye. There was a triangle above the circle. I touched it and my fingers tingled. It was another spell.

I climbed out of bed and pulled on my bathrobe and slippers. It was quite chilly. I walked downstairs and went to the computer. I googled Abaddon. The symbols on my arms were the Hebrew writing for Abaddon. He had branded me as I dragged him down to Hell. He had bound himself to me by giving me his power. There was a small locust tattooed in the triangle. Locusts were Abaddon’s symbol. Apparently, Abaddon wasn’t just some hideous toad demon. He was also the demon who would usher in the apocalypse. It was nice of my mother to release him on our town. I scratched at my arm and tried to pull the ink off. I knew the act was futile, but it still felt good to try to dig the bastard out. I could still smell him on me.

I got up and stepped outside. His fingerprint was there. I could still see the trees that had been burnt down in our battle. It was far too cold and there was also a lingering darkness. It was nowhere near what it had been when the demon had been sucking the town dry, but there was still something wrong. I could smell it in the air. I stepped back inside. As always, The Black Magnolia was immune to the decay outside its doors.

I went into the kitchen and looked in my spell book. I found a recipe for one of the potions Fred made with such fluidity. I dug around and found everything I needed and went to work. I brewed tea. I added ingredients and stirred it to match the rune symbol the book said it should match. I took my time and brewed three cups of tea this way. I drank mine first. It filled me with warmth and strength. I felt better. My outlook was better and I felt stronger. In fact, I felt tip-top.

I placed the sweetened teas on a tray and carried them upstairs. I woke Diane first. I set the tea down and said something that was completely unlike me. It had to have been the potion talking.

“Waky, Waky, eggs and baky!” I said with disgusting cheerfulness.

Diane opened her eyes and looked at me in the same manner someone might look at a small child that had just announced they soiled themselves in your bed. I handed her the cup of tea and she took it. She sat up. Her hair was a mess and her entire demeanor shrieked “I am not a morning person.” She and I both worked mostly nights. We weren’t morning people.

“What’s wrong with you?” Diane croaked.

“I don’t know,” I said.

Diane drank her tea and then she looked at me with a bright smile. Her entire face lit up. She looked into the empty cup.

“Wow,” she said.

“I know,” I said.

“I’m taking a shower. Go give some of that to Fred and see what he says,” Diane said.

I skipped towards my room and set the tea down before I jumped into bed with Fred. Fred gave me roughly the same look Diane gave me when I woke her. Fred looked at me with disgust and then looked at the tea.

“I think you put a little too much energy into that tea,” Fred said.

“You should try it,” I said as I climbed on top of him.

“I’m glad to see you’re feeling better, but I would rather not climb out of my own skin with manic energy right now, thank you very much. Before you make any more potions, would you let me show you how to get the balance right?”

“Why?” I asked. “This is amazing.”

“I’m sure crystal meth is a wonderful experience, too, but I’m not going to run out and get any.”

“Hey,” I complained. “Don’t call my potion crystal meth.”

“It isn’t crystal meth,” he said. “You’re just a little …”

He looked into my eyes for a long time and then he smiled.

“Fuck it,” he said. “Give me the damn tea.”

He drank the tea and we fucked like rabbits. It was wonderful and when we were done, he made Diane and I waffles. The three of us sat at the dining room table overflowing with energy, eating waffles like they were going out of business. When we were done, somehow, we were able to face the necessary.

* * *

We walked into the woods together by the light of the full moon. I carried a jar full of locusts and Diane carried a flame made from cedar. Fred carried a tarot card. It was The Tower, destruction. It was cold, but we were determined. We walked to the old slave cabins and lit a bonfire with the flame Diane had brought. Fred and I worked together drawing the circle and placing the triangle at the top. We worked together completing the circle. I sat in the center of the circle, next to the fire.

I opened the jar of locusts and released some of them into the fire. They fizzled and burned and cracked. I touched the symbol on my arm.

“Abaddon, the destroyer, with this act, I banish your influence from this world using the power you gave me,” I said.

Fred threw the tarot card into the flame.

“Abaddon, the destroyer, with this act, I banish your influence from this world using the power you gave me,” I said again.

I threw the jar of locusts into the flames. The jar broke and the remaining locusts flew out. The insects made a popping noise as they burst into flames and died in the fire.

“Abaddon, the destroyer, with this act, I banish your influence from this world using the power you gave me,” I said again.

I lifted my hand from the symbol on my arm and Fred smothered the fire with sand. We stood in the circle looking out. It was over. I could feel it in my bones. Abaddon wasn’t happy about it, but it was over. We stepped out of the circle and we could feel the air was warmer already. I took a deep breath. The air tasted better too. I walked around. I felt good about what I had done, but when I looked down at my arm, I hated the constant reminder of that stinky toad demon. I would always be bound to him.

I looked over at Fred and he nodded. He felt it, too. It was over. We walked home through the snow. It was already melting. It felt like an average Alabama winter day. It was cool but not cold.

When we got home, Fred built a fire. We sat in the circle of warmth. Fred smiled at me. I knew what was coming next. I smiled at him and put my hand on his shoulder. There was a knock on the door. I left the back parlor and walked to the front door and opened it. On my door step there was a nice looking gentleman in a clean, expensive suit. He wasn’t particularly attractive, but his grooming and presence would have made him appealing to many women. His clothes were old and out of style. They were so far out of style, they looked like a costume. He had dark hair and dark eyes and a long narrow face. He studied me in the same way I studied him. Finally, he leaned over and smelled me and then he stepped in my house.

I let him walk in. He looked at me again with black eyes that registered a lack of compassion and humanity. He was cold.

“Hello,” he said. “I’m The Guild ambassador. My name is Aleister Crowley.”

Of course, I knew who Aleister Crowley was. I had a friend in college who had been interested in the occult and the black arts and Aleister Crowley was a name she mentioned often enough. He had founded some occult churches and written many books I had never read, but had seen my friend read. He had once called himself the most evil man alive. Looking at him, I doubted he was any worse than Nineveh.

“Hello,” I said to him. “I’m Phaedra Michaels.”

“Nice to meet you, Phaedra. I’m here to talk about recent events,” he said with a cold smile.

“Come in and sit down,” I said.

I showed Mr. Crowley into the parlor.

“Do you know Frederick …”

“Yes,” Mr. Crowley interrupted. “I know Frederick De Navarre. Who doesn’t?”

Fred stood up and shook hands with Mr. Crowley. The two men nodded at each other and Crowley sat down on the sofa as far from Fred and Diane as he could. He sat stiffly and didn’t lean back. We all waited for Crowley to speak.

“For many years now,” Crowley began, “Nineveh has been the most dangerous witch alive. We’ve all known it and attempted to clip her wings. However, her status as the Phoenix has prevented us from fully pursuing punishment. Do you know the story of the Phoenix?” Crowley asked me.

“I know a little,” I answered.

“Several thousand years ago, there was a very famous oracle. She was known as the oracle at Delphi. One of King Solomon’s daughters visited the oracle. She asked the oracle how long she would live. The oracle told her she would live to see the last of the spellcasters die. She said the last spellcaster would die with the Phoenix. When the daughter asked who the Phoenix was, the oracle said that the Phoenix would emerge from the very flames of Hades to become the greatest spellcaster to live and her death would see the death of the last of her kind.”

“This daughter of Solomon would later be called Morgause and she still calls herself that today. She trained Nineveh and it was she who called Nineveh the Phoenix. Of course, she recognizes her error now.”

“Why did she think Nineveh was the Phoenix?”

“She’s about as clear as an oracle or a pooka. She speaks in riddles. I think it’s because Nineveh defeated Merlin. Morgause herself could never defeat Merlin, so she assumed Nineveh must be the witch of legend.”

“So you all wanted to do something about someone who’s homicidal, but your hands were tied by a three-thousand year old prophecy told to a woman named Morgause?” I said.

“Yes,” Crowley answered.

“Remind me not to join your club,” I said.

“A little respect is in order, mortal. I’m one of the most powerful warlocks alive and I could kill you a thousand times over. Our club, as you call it, seats the most powerful people on Earth.”

“Calm down, Aleister,” Fred said. “She has a point and you know it. Morgause isn’t the most reliable source in the world.”

“Frederick, she is our leader and she knows more about the dark arts than anyone alive, even you.”

“I wouldn’t argue that,” Fred said. “But time fades even the best memories and Morgause is so old, she forgets what century she is in. You don’t agree with 90% of what she says either, in any case.”

“Only because I think that those of you who cling to the Book of Solomon are limiting yourselves and the power you can take,” Crowley said.

“Okay,” I said. “So, what do you want from me?”

“We would like you and your oracle to come back to Chateau De Blanc with us and testify before The Guild as to what happened here and what the demon Abaddon revealed to you. We would like to finally end Nineveh’s power on this Earth.”

“I don’t know … ” I began.

“Before you answer,” Crowley said. “We will pay for everything. Your tickets are already booked and we will reward you generously for your time.”

I looked at Diane. She seemed reluctant. “I leave it up to Diane,” I answered.

“You leave it up to your oracle?” Crowley was incredulous.

“She isn’t my oracle,” I said. “She is my friend and the closest thing to family I have and the decision is hers.”

Diane looked at me. She settled back into the sofa and then she looked at Crowley. She closed her eyes and sat quietly for a minute. I couldn’t tell if she was thinking or sleeping.

“We should go,” Diane said. “And I could use the money. How much are you paying?”

“Fifty thousand each,” Crowley said as if it were loose change.

“Okay,” I said looking at Crowley. “We’re in. What time do we leave?”

“We leave from Huntsville airport tomorrow at 6 p.m. sharp,” Crowley answered. “I would like to rest now if you could show me to my room?”

“No,” I said. “I’ll go with you, but frankly you are a very creepy man and I don’t want you in my house longer than necessary. There are plenty of hotels here and in Huntsville. Find one. I’m sorry. I’ve been through a lot and I don’t want Aleister Crowley, the most evil man alive, now undead, or whatever you call yourself, in my house.”

Crowley shrugged dismissively. “Nothing ever changes,” he said. “You’ve already gotten your hands into her, haven’t you, priest? All good and evil. God and the Devil. Black and White,” he said to Fred. “If you ever want to open your mind to the true nature of the Universe and good and evil,” he said to me, “come see me. I could show you things that priest can only dream of.”

“I’m sure you could,” I said. “I’ll see you at the airport.”

Crowley studied me for several minutes before he stood to leave. He was the type of man that was used to being feared. He was used to people doing what he said. He wasn’t prepared for my defiance, but I could also tell by the look on his face that he found it fascinating. He looked me up and down as I walked him to the door and the way he looked at me, I could see why he was granting me more grace than he would the average witch. He was an infamously lascivious man. He had invented sex magic and I knew the look he gave me didn’t make me special. I was one of a million women he had desired.

Before he stepped out the door, Crowley took my hand and kissed it in a gesture that was meant to be classy, Old World, and seductive. Instead, I found the pressure of his fat lips on my hand slimy and offensive. He left and I wiped the back of my hand on my pants before I slammed the door.

Fred had been standing behind us and he laughed when he saw this gesture.

“I think you are the first woman to do that.” He laughed.

“What?” I asked.

“He was using his patented love spell on you. You couldn’t feel it?” he asked.

“No, yuck. I would rather fuck a monkey. How was he casting a love spell on me? Why was he casting a love spell on me? Why didn’t you warn me?”

“He casts love spells on all the young spellcasters. It’s his thing. He loves sex magic. He says it draws the raw power of the Universe down upon him, whatever that means. He has a tattoo given to him by Aphrodite herself that he uses for the spell, or so he says. I could see him mashing the damn tattoo the entire time he was talking to you. I’m sorry I didn’t warn you. Crowley is a bastard, but he is a Guild member and it’s against the law to interfere with another Guild member’s spell, unless it will harm others.”