The Adventures of Phineas Frakture (12 page)

Episode
11

Shadows began stretching across the city as both electric and gas lamps flickered on to combat the oncoming darkness. The setting sun cast its orange hue through the clock tower while Phineas and William intently watched the streets below.

In the distance, the Imperial zeppelin still hovered over the decimated Brownstone, and at regular intervals, soldiers could be seen rappelling to the ground below. They then moved outwards in their search for the missing mummy. Fortunately for the trio, the soldiers had checked the clockwork’s doors, found them secure, and moved on. Unfortunately, other soldiers were still swarming the streets around the factory.

“William,” said Phineas, “go down and find the telephone and get hold of Abigail. Explain our situation and tell her to pick us up as soon as possible.”

“On my way,” William replied, quickly bounding down the stairs. Moments later, he shouted up, “She’s on her way! We’re to meet her in the courtyard.”

Phineas looked at Steamhotep. “Can you walk?”

“Of course,” he replied. “I am spry for my age.”

Phineas cracked a wry smile. “At least you have kept your sense of humor over the years. Let’s go.”

On the ground floor, they met William, who was watching out one of the windows facing the factory’s courtyard.

“Why must we go this way?” asked Steamhotep.

“There are some very bad people looking for you…who don’t want to end your curse, but to use your technology for their own purposes.”

Steamhotep touched his heart. “I used this once for the wrong purpose. I cannot let that happen again.”

The beating of a rotor made them look through the window. Quickly descending, a small copter came to rest in the courtyard. The trio hurried outside and boarded the craft.

“That was fast,” Phineas told Abigail as he took the seat beside her.

“Just be glad that I was at the airfield when William called.” She gave a quick gasp as Steamhotep climbed aboard and looked around at the aircraft, with Sweepio still attached to his hand. “Uh…who is that?”

“Abigail…meet my cousin…um, Vernon…from Jersey.”

“Why do I even bother? William! Get
Vernon
strapped in.”

William shot her a confused look, but did as he was told.

The steam rotor craft’s boiler chugged as the ship lifted off. Phineas watched the soldiers start to scramble back to their airship as they realized their quarry was escaping. He figured they would have at least an hour before the giant airship caught up with them. That was more than enough time to do what he had planned.

“This contraption has the handsomes beat when it comes to traffic,” William said when they touched down in Phineas’ backyard. “I could almost see these things catching on as regular transport.”

Steamhotep was still in awe of the modern marvel. “I think that seeing wonders such as these has made my curse worth all its sorrow.”

“Yes…yes, great advances. Time’s wasting, though. Come along, everyone.” Phineas hurried out of the copter while Abigail shut it down. Steam escaped from the valves as the boiler cooled, shrouding the machine in its own fog.

Phineas burst through the backdoor and shouted. “Mrs. Popkiss! Coffee, if you please…doubly strong. And where’s my mercurial ionizer? The one that set fire to the sofa last week?”

The housekeeper appeared holding a pot. “It’s in the umbrella stand…where it always is. Wipe your feet, all of you! I just got this house in order, thank you. Oh, my,” she said as the mummy entered behind them. Without missing a beat, she berated him without a second thought. “You, sir, mind your bits. I’ll have no body parts falling off and dirtying my clean rugs. Lord, have mercy on an old woman…” She continued her tirade unheard, disappearing into the kitchen.

“William, take him into the lab while I fetch some things. Mrs. Popkiss! We might be having guests shortly.”

“I’ll put on the tea!” she shouted back.

William showed Steamhotep into the freshly cleaned lab and offered him a seat. There was an awkward silence as Steamhotep stared at his host.

“So, how’s Cleopatra these days?” asked William, only to receive a blank stare. “All right, I guess that is a bit after your time.”

“You are cursed,” Steamhotep said suddenly.

“No, I’m not,” William answered just as quickly.

“Yes, you are. After being enclosed in a tomb for three thousand years, one’s mind becomes adept at seeing things not immediately apparent. You hold the burden of one who is cursed.”

“I guess that you would know, of all people,” resigned William. “It is getting worse and no one can help me.”

“Turn to your friend. He will help you as he is helping me.”

“With all due respect, he is going to blow you up…not the sort of help I am seeking. I also think that you have a little more faith in him than I do.”

“Faith is all you need. Do not lose it.”

At that moment, Phineas entered carrying tools and a cup of coffee. He sat down at his work table and began putting together a small coil with several leads and fashioned a tiny set of gears as well.

Abigail followed him in a short time later. Throwing her jacket on a shelf, she eyed the living mummy. “Is anyone going to tell me just what is going on?”

“Phineas is going to end the mummy’s curse before State Security can get a hold of him,” said William.

“Didn’t he kill Cavanaugh?”

“Not at all. You see, it was a cult that was after the mummy as well. They ended up being smeared into the sides of a building during a mystical storm that brought Steamhotep back to life,” William replied.

“I see. You boys just can’t have a simple weekend, can you? Should I even ask why he has a head stuck to his hand?”

“My interpreter,” answered Steamhotep/Sweepio.

“Of course.” She turned to Phineas. “How do you plan on ending the mummy’s curse?”

“With that,” Phineas replied, pointing at a small canister bolted down on a shelf.

Abigail examined the container and found that she couldn’t move it. “What’s in here?” she asked suspiciously.

“Cavorite.”

“WHAT?” William and Abigail asked in unison.

“Where did you get cavorite?” added William. “And do you know what the University would do to you if they found out that you have it?”

“It’s better that you don’t know, and they’d probably make me Chancellor.”

“Now, I know that cavorite floats on air, but just how is it going to help him?” asked William.

“Here’s a little known fact,” said Phineas, leaning back in his chair. “Cavorite, when stimulated by a continuous electrical charge, will lose its stability and explode.”

“How big of an explosion are we talking about?” asked Abigail warily.

Phineas picked up a small one-inch cog. “Say that this represents the normal blast radius of a stick of dynamite. Now imagine a cog twenty feet in diameter.”

“That should do it,” swallowed William. “But, where are we going to do this? The house, not to mention the neighborhood, would be leveled…and the neighbors don’t like you as it is.”

“The cavorite will take care of that, and the heart will do the rest. This mechanism will run off of the gears in the heart; it generates an electrical charge which will be fed directly to the cavorite, which, in turn, will be inside the heart. Steamhotep will float into the air to a safe distance and then explode, destroying the heart, and him, in one fell swoop.”

“Are you sure that this will work?” asked Abigail.

“Positive. The alternative is facing Mrs. Popkiss’ wrath for destroying her garden.”

“She is a formidable woman,” stated Steamhotep.

“You don’t know the half of it,” added William.

Phineas finished his work and stood up. “Let’s get ready,” he said. “William, I shall need your help attaching the cavorite. As soon as I turn the jar over, grab the metal before it goes through the ceiling.”

Phineas released the clamps holding the jar to the shelf, and William cupped his hands over the opening. His hands shot straight up, and his feet began to lift from the floor. Abigail ran over and pulled him down.

“Now, this is fun,” William said as Abigail pulled his hands down to the work table.

Phineas attached the leads to the metal then guided everyone to Steamhotep, who waited with an amused, yet curious look on his face.

The door to the lab opened, and Mrs. Popkiss entered, wearing a helmet with goggles and holding a large rifle. “Company is arriving, sir. They’re about half a mile south.”

“Very well, Mrs. Popkiss. We are almost ready here,” said Phineas.

As Mrs. Popkiss returned to her post outside, they heard her say, “If they land on my hibiscus, there will be war!”

“Is that another vomit gun?” asked Abigail.

“No, that one turns geese orange,” replied Phineas nonchalantly. “Abigail, I’ll need you to hold Steamhotep down when I place this in his heart. William, you too, as soon as you let go.”

Abigail placed her hands on the mummy’s shoulders, and she turned a slight shade of green as parts of him flaked off.

Phineas inserted the cavorite and connected the gear mechanism to the Heart of Ra. “Are you ready?” he asked Steamhotep.

“I have been ready for over three thousand years. Accept my gratitude and know that my journey ends well. I have been shunned for so long, it brings me peace to be with those who can understand my plight.”

“I wish that we had more time. I think that you would enjoy the nineteenth century.”

“Every saga must end. Yours is just beginning. Be sure that your story ends better than mine. Know what is truly important in your life and cherish it.” To emphasize his point, Steamhotep’s good eye flicked quickly towards Abigail.

“Abigail, open the skylight,” Phineas said softly.

As the portal opened, Phineas activated the gear setting, and a small electrical arc began bombarding the cavorite. Steamhotep looked up as Phineas and William let go of him. The ancient engineer floated gracefully, as if lifted by the gods themselves. When he cleared the roof, they heard a panicked voice shouting, “Help! I am flying away!”

“Sweepio?” asked William.

“Great. We forgot about him. Well, there goes a hundred dollars out the window…or skylight,” replied Phineas.

“Sir, we are approaching the destination,” stated the captain of the Imperial Airship
Zephyr
.

“Ready the men for deployment as soon as we are over the target,” answered Lieutenant Farringdon Thorne. “Everything is to be seized…” Thorne stopped mid-sentence as something flashed past the cabin window. “Did you see…?”

“It looked to me like a flying mummy, sir,” stated the pilot.

“I think it…waved…as it went by,” added the captain.

Everyone in the cabin moved to the window and looked up. A few seconds later, a brilliant light lit up the sky, temporarily turning night to day. Another few seconds passed before a thunder clap crossed the area and a shockwave rippled the outer canvas envelope of the airship.

Elsewhere, over the Exposition, fireworks had begun going off, celebrating the end of the first weekend. Spectators talked about the display for years afterwards as one of the best.

Phineas stared up through the skylight as the airship suddenly turned and moved off. “Tell Mrs. Popkiss that she can stand down from general quarters. Oh, and have her bring the brandy and four glasses to the study. I think we can take it easy for the rest of the night.”

Episode
12

Monday came and went. Students filed out of Professor Frakture’s classroom, grumbling about the grades they had received on the papers they had worked on all weekend, and about missing the opening of the exposition, to boot.

Phineas, eager to get out and begin work on his engine once again, was filling his satchel with notes and tests when the door to the classroom closed and he heard the click of the lock. Looking up, he saw a familiar personage, dressed in a black uniform and trench coat, standing at the door.

“I was wondering when you would show up,” Phineas said without emotion. In fact, this man, a security agent from Division Five, scared the living hell out of him.

“This is twice that we have met under less than auspicious circumstances,” the man said.

“Well, it is certainly not by my choosing,” retorted Phineas. “You seem to think that I care to see you.”

“Two times,” the man held up two fingers, “you have taken what I want from me, whether intentionally or unintentionally. Once is happenstance, twice…well, I don’t believe in coincidences.”

“Neither do I; but believe me, you’re the last one I’m thinking of when I’m going about my life. Anyway, what possible motive could you have for wanting a three-thousand-year-old mummy?” asked Phineas.

The man sidled over to a desk and sat on the corner of it. “Let me tell you a story, professor. It is about a game of chess. The world is the board. On one side is the Empire. On the other…everyone else. We are not only playing to win the game, but to dominate it. In order to do that, we need pawns—those that we can throw at our enemies to weaken their forces and eventually capture their kings, or queens.

“It is rumored that Victoria has a legion of undead soldiers, powered by boilers and mind control…killing machines that have no fear and no conscience. The Czar has battalions of giant walking mechanica with cannons with bores larger than any in our army. I won’t even say what the Chinese Emperor is suspected of having at his disposal. It is too fearsome to even mention.

“You, professor, are denying us our pawns—two weapons that could have tipped the scales in our favor. First, the ultimate ground trooper, and now, the secret of an immortal soldier.”

“I’m sorry that I have caused you so much hardship,” Phineas said coolly. “Your superiors must be thinking quite low of you about now. But, quite frankly, your methods leave something to be desired. The wanton genetic destruction of innocents to further your military gain cannot be condoned. Those Dolonite soldiers didn’t enlist voluntarily—they were kidnapped from their families and lives and mutated into mindless monsters. And, as for the secret of immortality…they would be better off dead, to spare them of the suffering that they would endure.”

“Then why didn’t you take your knowledge of the Dolonites to the newspapers and expose us if you are so righteous?”

Phineas hesitated for a moment. This was treading on thin ice, and now was not the time for him to lose his composure. “Because, like so many others, I had someone who was taken by the beasts. It was enough that I learned of their fates. Others didn’t need to know.”

“Both proud and noble,” mocked the agent. “You realize that even with these setbacks, we will still have the finest war machine in the world. On land, in the air, even the oceans shall see our might—above and below. You see, plans are under way, even as we speak, to dominate below the surface. Our Empire will spread across the globe like wild fire when the time comes, and you, professor, can relish in the fact that you were part of it. Now, doesn’t that sound nice?”

“What are you talking about? I denied you your soldiers. I want nothing to do with war.”

The agent pulled a roll of papers from his coat and threw them on Phineas’ desk. “Recognize these? You drew them up for us several years ago. A contest, I believe it was. One that you were eager to win…to show off your intellect. The government made a few modifications to them, but the basis of your designs is still there.”

Phineas looked over the schematics and recognized his work. A second set of similar documents held the design plus modifications for armaments. He scowled and crushed them into a ball.

“Oh, do keep them. They will make for a nice memento after the war. And the war
is
coming, whether you want it to or not. Contrary to popular belief, one man cannot make a difference…at least not when he opposes the grand scheme.” The agent pulled a card with the name ‘Farringdon Thorne’ from his wallet and placed it on the desk. “If you ever change your mind about joining us, let me know. You really do nice work. I’ve driven one of the battle machines myself. It handles beautifully.” Thorne went to the door and unlocked it. “Oh, by the way, enjoy London...while you can. I hear that the weather is absolutely dreadful this time of year.” The agent opened the door and William entered as he was leaving. “Good afternoon, Mr. Patterson.”

“Good afternoon,” William replied, only to give him a second glance, wondering how the man knew his name. Once he was gone, William waved his hand in front of his face. “Is there a sewer problem in this city? I have been smelling the most pungent of odors lately.”

“Could be,” said Phineas. “The rats are certainly out in force.”

“What did he want?”

Phineas picked up his satchel and walked William to the door. “He seems to think that I am some sort of rebel, eager to thwart the Empire at every move.”

“Posh. The only thing you ever rebelled against was when Mrs. Popkiss tried to switch you to tea. Although, I have to say that you were very passionate about that cause.”

“A mistake she will not soon make again, I dare say.”

They walked in silence to the edge of campus where they hailed a cab and headed for Phineas’ home. Along the way, Phineas stared out the window at the citizens going about their daily business. If Thorne’s prediction about the war was true, then all of these lives would be turned upside down. Life as everyone knew it would end. Not since Mexico foolishly attacked a battalion of Steam Walkers at the Alamo had there been war in this nation. Though America had an easy victory at that time, this would be entirely different. Their adversaries would be much more prepared this time around.

When they arrived at the house, Phineas picked up the mail, which was bundled and tossed at the front gate. One of these days, he would have a talk with the postman so the lout would stop with his irrational fears.

Mrs. Popkiss greeted them at the door and handed Phineas a cup of coffee as he dropped his bag and made his way to the study with William in tow. He flopped into his favorite leather chair in front of the fireplace as his friend took up his usual position in the chair opposite. After a few moments of brooding silence, Phineas began recounting what Thorne had told him.

“That’s awful,” said William once Phineas was finished. “After all these years striving for peaceful applications for your inventions, they pervert your work into war machines.” He paused, staring at the pile of ashes in the fireplace, and then continued with a change of subject. “There is one thing that I don’t understand about our mummy affair.”

“Just one? I’m still trying to grasp several aspects,” replied Phineas.

“How did you know that Steamhotep wouldn’t hurt us in the clock tower?”

“I felt that I had to change gears, so to speak, and think along different lines after what we saw in the basement. What if the mummy didn’t want to be resurrected? What if the curse on the sarcophagus didn’t pertain to others, but to the occupant? I had to look at his situation and not ours. Like he said, he and I are kindred spirits. All he wanted to do was build. Where is the despair in that? It had to be something different.”

“Do you believe that it was really magic that kept him alive? That Anubis really does or did exist?”

“Yet another ‘what if?’” said Phineas. “Can you explain the storm that we saw up on that roof through scientific means? Can you explain why there was a man without organs walking around, who should have been dead millennia ago? I certainly can’t. Does this change the world as we know it? Possibly, but until there are more facts, we can only surmise the truth. But…what if?”

William took a sip of coffee. “What if you told Abigail how you really feel?”

Phineas looked at his friend, slightly startled by the sudden query. “I’ve shown her my affection for her.”

“How?”

“Well…I gave her a new pressure valve for her rotor’s engine a month ago.”

“Which blew up.”

“Manufacturer’s defect.”

“
You
built it.”

“Like I said.”

William and Phineas looked at each other and then burst out laughing.

The door to the study opened and Abigail entered. “What is so funny?” she asked.

“Nothing,” replied William. “Phineas made a joke.”

“Right. I believe that like I believe in flying mummies. But, I guess anything is possible.” She stretched out on the sofa between them. “I’ve had the worst day. It has been a mad house at the airfield with all these new trainees coming in. It’s like everyone wants to be a pilot these days. But, it’s strange. They all seemed to be connected to the military.”

“That would seem to fit what Phineas just told me,” said William. He then went into detail about their previous conversation as Phineas began sorting through the mail.

“Well, this just became more interesting,” Phineas stated as William finished. “I received an invitation from an old school mate to speak at a forum.”

“He doesn’t have anything to do with mummies…or vampires, does he?” asked Abigail.

“No, but before Thorne left my classroom he told me to enjoy London while I could.”

“And?”

“Guess where the forum is being held. London.”

“Couldn’t be a coincidence, could it?” asked William.

“I don’t believe in coincidences…and he said the same thing to me,” said Phineas.

“You aren’t really thinking of going, are you? It’s obviously…well, it couldn’t be a trap. Who would want to capture you? All right, I have no reason for you not to go,” said Abigail.

“Who said anything about just me going?” Phineas held up three tickets. “Pack your bags, you two. We have first-class tickets to the land of good manners.”

Clarence Kinneany was having a lousy day; well, to be exact, a lousy year. Ever since the new Coumby’s Chittering Chimney Sweep, a mechanical squirrel with a wire bristle tail, went on the market, his trade as a sweep had gone south. Why pay for his services when you could wind up a squirrel and send it up the flue any time you wanted? He had just sat down on the curb and wiped what little soot he had on his face when a glittering object in the gutter caught his eye. Hoping that it was some bauble that one of these rich folk had dropped, he reached down and picked it up. It was slightly smaller than his fist and had many gears rotating within. It didn’t seem like much, but you never knew what the scrap yard might pay for spare parts. He rubbed it on his coat and then shoved it into his shirt pocket.

He suddenly felt a discomfort in his chest, probably from the sausage he had for lunch, he thought. Clarence let out a loud belch yet still didn’t feel relieved. The discomfort turned to a sharp pain, and he pulled open his shirt to reveal the bauble attached right above his heart. Small tendrils snaked out, impaling his flesh. Bones were suddenly ejected from his legs and left arm only to be replaced by mechanica. Clarence clawed at his face as something protruded from his eye. He screamed in rage and fear until…it was finally over.

Turning to the east, the Heart of Ra’s next victim spoke one word: “Home.”