The Apartment: The Complete Affair (56 page)

“That’s it, baby. Ride my fingers.” He plunged them into her deeper and deeper, loving the way that she worked herself on him, bucking and grinding her hips while her inner muscles squeezed him tightly. “God… you’re so fucking wet!” he whimpered when he felt her juices starting to drip down his hand. She could only moan and nod, unwilling to stop feasting on him for even a second.

Ethan slowly pulled his fingers free and sucked them into his mouth, her hypnotic flavor making his eyes roll back. With a possessive snarl, he reached over with both hands and started pulling at her panties, tugging them down over her bottom as he jerked her hips closer to his face.

“Get these fucking things off or I’m going to rip them,” he growled. She lifted her knees, allowing him enough clearance to slide them down past her calves until she could kick them the rest of the way off. As soon as she was freed, he was pulling at her hips again. “Get the hell over here right now.”

When she was close enough he grabbed her, lifting her up so that she could swing one leg over his head. He settled her over his mouth, lapping at her swollen folds as she writhed around, squirming from the overload of sensation. Never once did she let up on her own task, sucking him deeper still and loving the feeling of his grunts and snarls against her wet flesh.

Lily bucked and swiveled her hips, grinding herself against his eager tongue, and when he slid two fingers back inside her from behind, she thought she might actually die from the intense pleasure. Knowing that she was going to be absolutely useless from the strength of her impending orgasm, she decided to try something new in the hopes of getting him there faster. Leaning forward, Lily sucked him as deep as possible. Only this time when he bumped the back of her throat, she swallowed.

It took her a couple of tries to relax her muscles enough for it to work, but when she felt the broad tip of him pushing into her throat she imagined that she was a porn star and Wonder Woman rolled into one. When Ethan let out a guttural moan against her and involuntarily jerked his hips, she felt damn near smug.

Eat your heart out, Jenna Jameson
.

Lily could tell from the tenseness in Ethan’s thighs that he was about to come, and the fact that he had begun working her even harder meant that it was going to be a race to the finish. His long fingers slid deeper and deeper, curling at just the right spot while he sucked on her clit, his own moaning making the most sensational vibrations. By the time Lily reached down to cup and massage his scrotum, it was all over.

The feeling of him swelling unbelievably harder in her throat sent her careening over the edge, and the feeling of her screams around his cock and the tightness of her inner muscles clamping down on him made Ethan come so hard that his ears began ringing. There was a moment when they became one enormous shaking orgasm before Lily fell to his side. She had barely enough energy to drag herself up next to him and collapse on his chest. No words were spoken between them, both out of exhaustion and awe at what they had just shared.

Before long, they were both asleep.

* * *

“Have I ever told you how much I love this little patch of freckles on the back of your shoulder?” Soft lips pressed to the area in question as Ethan wrapped his arms around Lily from behind, looking up at her over her shoulder in the mirror.

“I didn’t even know I had a patch of freckles there,” she laughed, leaning forward to finish applying her makeup.

“Well, you do. And it’s adorable. I can’t tell you how many nights I would lie awake, thinking of it.”

Lily stopped and looked at his reflection again, her lip-gloss applicator suspended in midair. “You thought about my freckles?”

“Of course I did,” he smiled, kissing her shoulder again. “You have tons of little treasures all over your body. Like this tiny chicken pox scar here, on your hip. Drives me crazy!” He leaned over and pulled the elastic of her pink cotton boy shorts down a few inches, smacking his lips loudly against a spot on her skin that she’d never even noticed before.

“Oh, you’re crazy, alright,” she giggled, a blush spreading over her exposed flesh at the thought of him paying such close attention to her. “I guess I’m not one to talk, though. You have a mole on the back of your neck that makes me want to do naughty, naughty things.”

“Where?” he asked in disbelief, standing up and turning, trying to angle his head so that he could see himself in the mirror.

“Right here.” Lily touched the small brown spot just below his hairline, and the gentle glide of her fingertips across his skin sent a shiver through his body.

“Stop that, you’re giving me goosebumps.”

“Gee, maybe that’s because you’re still standing here in a towel with wet hair. Now, would you please go and get dressed already? I’m trying to get ready for work and having you here looking like that and kissing on me is not helping!”

“Alright, I’m going,” he sighed, raising his hands in mock surrender as he backed out of the bathroom. “But only because you’re going to lick my neck mole if I don’t.”

“Don’t you forget it!” she called after him, rolling her eyes at how playful he was being and secretly loving every minute of it.

By the time Lily had thrown on her scrubs and tossed her hair up in a messy pile on top of her head, Ethan was already dressed and waiting for her by the door, munching on a warm s’mores Pop Tart. As she grabbed her purse and joined him to leave, he held out the pastry’s twin to her, causing her to stop in her tracks.

“Here, I thought we could split a package since you’re running late.” When she didn’t say anything for a moment and continued to stare at the item in his hand, he began to worry. “Oh, hey, I hope that’s okay. I mean… I hope you don’t mind that I helped myself. Shit, I should have asked, huh?”

After another second she reached out and took it, slowly shaking her head. “No, no… that’s fine.”

“Then what’s wrong?” he asked as she walked past him in a daze, heading for the stairs.

“Nothing,” she called back absentmindedly, leaving him to lock up as she nibbled her breakfast on the way to her car.

Ethan hurried after her, grabbing her by the elbow once he caught her in the parking lot. “Here, why don’t you let me drive you today? I can pick you back up later and we can hang out here tonight, how does that sound?”

“You don’t have to do that,” she said quietly, averting her eyes from his.

“Who said anything about ‘have to’? I
want
to. Besides… I don’t feel right letting you drive off like this. You’re starting to worry me.” With that she finally looked up, and Ethan could see the tears collecting in the corners of her eyes. “Lily, please tell me what’s wrong! I won’t know how I fucked up if you don’t tell me.
Communication
, remember?”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, I swear. I’m just being stupid.” When she tried to look away again he reached out and grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at him.

“Hey, I’m serious. Tell me what’s going on.”

“It’s just that… nobody takes care of me. It’s usually the other way around.”

“Lily, it was just a Pop Tart.”

“I know,” she sniffed. “I know. But it was just a sweet, considerate thing to do. I guess I was just overwhelmed for a minute.”

“Overwhelmed by what?”

She tried to look away again but he wouldn’t let her move. “By how much I love you,” she whispered.

Ethan tried to ignore how much his heart soared at her words, focusing instead on whatever had her upset. “You say that like it’s a bad thing. I’m constantly overwhelmed by my feelings for you, by how strong they are, and I love it.”

“It doesn’t scare you?”

“No, honestly. It makes me feel alive.” He leaned down and kissed her gently. “I’ve never felt as alive as I do when I’m with you. Why are you scared?”

She took a deep breath and decided that it was now or never. She had to be honest with him or else the stress of worrying all the time would eat her up inside. “Because… I won’t be able to take it this time if you leave again. I already need you too much as it is.”

“Okay, give me this shit.” He grabbed the cooling Pop Tart and her purse and set them on the roof of his car before grabbing her face with both hands. “Look at me. Are you listening?” At her silent nod, he continued. “You have every right to feel that way after how I left before, but I need you to know that it’s never going to happen again.
Ever
. Do you understand me?”

“But what if—”

“
No
. No ‘what ifs’. I tried to fool myself into thinking that I didn’t need whatever this is between us, that I could live without it, and it nearly ruined me. I kept telling myself that I didn’t do anything wrong because I never promised you anything, but that was a lie.”

“What are you talking about? I was the liar. I was the one who was engaged to another man. You didn’t owe me anything.”

“That’s where you’re wrong. From the first moment these hands touched your skin, I promised you my heart. I belonged to you from our very first kiss, and every kiss after that only bound me to you even more. When I left, I turned my back on that promise. I should have stuck it out and told you how I felt, but I ran away with my tail between my legs.”

“We’re both guilty of that,” Lily sighed. “I should have ended my engagement the day I met you. I knew after that very first night that I would never feel that way again with any other man… even attempting to would have been pointless.”

Ethan smiled down at her, sliding his fingers across her cheek to tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “This connection between us is too powerful to fight, I know that now. I have no interest in even trying to exist in a world without you. Can we just… I don’t know… start over?”

“I thought that’s what we were doing.”

“Yes, but we need to have faith in each other. I’m with you now, and I’m not going anywhere. I need you to believe that, or else you’re always going to doubt me.”

“I don’t doubt that you love me, Ethan. I can feel it every time you look at me. I can hear it every time you say my name. I’m just… apprehensive, I guess. I’m worried that it could all disappear again. I’m scared that I’ll get too attached and you’ll just be able to let it all go.” Lily could feel the hot tears flowing freely down her cheeks.

“That’s what I’m talking about. I need you to stop holding me at arm’s length.”

“What do you mean? I love you and I want this to work. I don’t want to be without you.”

“I know that, but if we are going to have any real chance of starting over, you’re going to have to give me the benefit of the doubt. I am head over heels in love with you. Hell, my entire family is head over heels in love with you, and I’m pretty sure they’d choose you over me if I ever fucked up again.”

“Oh, stop,” she blushed, trying to look away again as she wiped at her eyes.

“No, it’s true and you know it. I’ve opened up my life and my heart to you more than anyone else in my past, and that includes a relationship that lasted ten fucking years. I’m ready to give this everything I have, but you haven’t even told your father about me yet, have you?”

Lily blinked a few times, shocked by his question. “Well… no. Not yet.”

“Why not? Are you ashamed of me?” he asked, his words tainted with the slightest hint of insecurity.

“Of course not! How can you ask that?”

“Well, like I said, you’ve already met everyone in my family. They all played a part in getting us back together and know all the messy details of how we first met. Now, I’m not saying he needs to hear all of that, but I think it’s a bit messed up that he doesn’t even know I exist.”

Lily immediately felt ashamed that she’d never considered his feelings on the matter. She’d been happy to let Ethan court her and invite her into his life, but when it came to returning the favor her actions had been sorely lacking. She hadn’t trusted him enough to let him into the rest of her life the way that he had for her.

Leaning in, she pulled him to her in a fierce hug. “I’m sorry,” she said against the fabric of his shirt. She could feel his hand close over the back of her neck, stroking her skin lovingly. “I never thought about it that way. I really did intend to introduce you… I guess I was waiting to make sure this was going to work out first.”

“I understand,” he said quietly, kissing the top of her head. “I made you a little gun shy. I get it. I just want the chance to make it up to you, and if you won’t let me in I’m worried that will never happen.”

“You’re right,” she sighed.

It wasn’t fair to stand back and watch him jump off the cliff alone. It was time for her to hold his hand and take the leap together.

Lily pulled back and looked up into his patient jade eyes. “Ethan… would you come to breakfast this Sunday? I’d love for you to meet my father.” She didn’t think it was possible for his eyes to be any more beautiful, but the way they glowed as he gave her a blinding smile made her feel weak in the knees.

“I’d love to.”

Ethan had never been quite so nervous in his entire life.

As much as he wanted to share every part of Lily’s life with her, he was floundering in completely foreign territory, having never once met a girlfriend’s father before. Rachel had never been close with her parents and she couldn’t have cared less if he ever met them.

Ethan knew he had technically met Mr. Blake before, but it had barely been a passing nod in a diner and was hardly the same thing as announcing that he was the new guy giving it to his daughter. It didn’t even matter that they hadn’t officially had sex since they’d been dating, it was still understood that they eventually would, and that was already enough ammo for her father to hate him. He shuddered to think of what her father would do if he ever caught wind of what he had already done to her.

Ethan steered his rental car into Lily’s lot, panicking slightly at the imposing sight of the car that was already parked in his usual spot. Pulling in beside it, he turned off the engine and checked his reflection once more in the rearview mirror anxiously, as if he were being graded on his appearance. His entire walk across the alley and up the stairs to her apartment was set to a soundtrack in his head, a never-ending loop of worried ramblings.