The Armor of God (38 page)

“I didn’t know that,” he replied.

“Well, we gave them reason to think so back then.”

“If this is about that whole thing with Rebecca and Garros, it’s okay.”

“Hear me out,” Akiva insisted. “I realize I’ve been a bit hermetic since we met, and I’ve been practicing this whole speech for a while. The day I went to the army camp, when we thought we’d start our military service, was something I had been looking forward to for a long time. I thought that I would meet new people, get new skills, have a complete change in the life I had.”

“Well you got that,” Ezra said.

Akiva laughed. “I don’t like talking about my past because, well . . . I’m not proud of it. The only one I’ve talked to about it is Jena.”

Ezra looked away from him and at Milos’ feet. A plate on its ankle displayed the triangular figure they had been trying to understand for weeks. It was then that Ezra made the simple connection: the blacked out circle on the top angle could represent Milos itself, as part of something bigger: something three times bigger.

“I told Jena because we had something in common: We’re both adopted,” he said.

“Jena was adopted?” Ezra said, looking back at Akiva.

“Yes. Leonardo wasn’t her biological dad, but he took her into his family when she was just a kid and gave her a home,” he said. “I wasn’t so lucky. It’s common in a world like this, but I never knew my parents. I was a crappy kid, and I could never stay with one foster family for very long.”

Ezra saw that it was very difficult for Akiva to share this, and he wondered why. Like he had said, being an orphan was not at all uncommon, and certainly not something that should shame him.

“I could never be friends with any of my foster brothers, and everywhere I went, I was bullied,” Akiva said.

“
You
were bullied?”

“Don’t sound surprised. I used to be about your size until a few years ago, and a little kid who was good in school, who couldn’t defend himself, and who had a bad attitude to boot, couldn’t make many friends. I seemed to attract bullies, even outside school. Kids who would remind me I never knew my parents, pushed me around, beat me up.”

“A lot of kids get that, I suppose,” Ezra said, eyes on Milos Ravana.

“Not many get the chance to turn the tables. I had a late growth spurt and for the first time felt what it was like for all those guys who picked on me, knowing I couldn’t fight back. So I did stupid things I regret. It wasn’t even that long ago but I still look back and cringe. I had promised myself never to turn into a bully, and I did,” he said. “That is why when you went to Rebecca behind my back—”

“I said it was okay.”

“I was still devastated about Susan. I couldn’t sleep at night because Alice’s screams kept replaying in my head. I even began to wonder if I was responsible for what happened in some way,” he said.

“You weren’t!”

“Still, it made me feel like a piece of crap. I went to the army base wanting to get a blank slate, forget about everything I was and become someone new: someone people would like. I suddenly felt like I was . . . I don’t know, reverting? I know telling you my pathetic life story isn’t going to change what I almost did, but maybe it might help you understand a little. You’re leaving Zenith and, well, I wanted to say something before you did.”

Ezra didn’t know what to say. He nodded stupidly, and Akiva smiled.

“Also, I knew that you liked Jena when I went after her,” he said, and Ezra’s stomach hurt. “I want you to know that I’m sorry if you felt hurt or betrayed, but I don’t regret it. I don’t know if your feelings for her have changed, but you should know she’s been great for me. We have a lot of things in common—”

“It’s okay,” Ezra said, not wishing to talk about the subject any more.

Akiva picked up on it. “Yeah. Thank you for listening.”

Ezra smiled and gave him a friendly punch in the shoulder. “Have you talked to Dr. Yuri about all this?”

“No,” Akiva said. “I told Susan when she was a counselor here, but not Dr. Yuri. I’ll do it today, maybe. He said he had something important to discuss with me, so I’m going to talk to him later. I hear he’s been a little loopy lately. He’s barely left his office.”

“Yeah,” Ezra said, and remembered the terrifying moment he had in Dr. Yuri’s office two nights earlier. Ezra wondered if he should have told someone about the man’s drunkenness and behavior. About the pistol.

Tomorrow comes
. . .

“A
little
loopy . . .”

“Thanks for listening, man,” said Akiva, and put his hand on Ezra’s shoulder. “Please don’t leave without saying good-bye.”

Ezra only had a few hours of sleep. Kat and Barnes had suggested lying low as much as possible, so he decided to stay in his room again, entertaining himself with some reading. It was remarkable to him how much his understanding of Dr. Mizrahi’s and Alice’s books improved in just a few months; experience was indeed the wisest teacher.

All classes, training, and operations were still on a forced hiatus, so all he had to do now was wait. Sometime soon, his mother would come and find him, he would regroup with Erin, Garros, and either Jena or Poole, and they would leave. Ezra still didn’t know what to feel about this unplanned exile; there was a journey ahead of him, one that could determine the perpetuation of human life on this world—something that he could have never imagined taking part in just a few months earlier.

Something he was entirely unprepared for, and a quest that could be his final earthly affair.

He was lucky it wasn’t a quest he would be taking alone.

Ezra had prepared himself for leaving home, when that word referred to Roue. Being placed in Zenith separated him from the city and his family, but not with such finality. Taking that separation one step further, and leaving the territory altogether, maybe to die, was terrifying. The only assurance he had was that his mother believed in his chances of returning.

It was a couple of hours after dawn that a desperate series of knocks on the dormitory door startled him awake. Ezra lumbered towards the door as if drunk and opened it. The door hissed, sliding into the wall. Jena was standing at the other side, her face a display of anxiety.

“Ezra, did you talk with Kiv last night?”

“Yes,” he said. “Why? What happened?”

“I don’t know but . . . he’s
gone
!” she said, and tears welled in her eyes.

Ezra ignored Kat’s instruction to remain in the dormitories. Jena appeared to be desperate, and couldn’t articulate what the problem really was. “He’s gone, Ezra—he disappeared.”

They descended the dormitory stairs, and found most of the pilots in the lounge below. A wide state of unease had taken over Zenith, and it was then that Ezra knew that something terrible had happened—something that would further harm Zenith’s chances of survival.

He ignored the sharp eyes of some of the older pilots, and was happy when he found Erin just outside the dormitories. “Ezra talked to him,” Jena told Erin.

“What the hell happened?” Ezra asked, beginning to catch the contagious uneasiness.

“Akiva disappeared. Milos Ravana is not in the docking bay.
He took off
!”

“I talked to him just a few hours ago; he was fine! He said he had a meeting with Dr. Yuri—”

Erin took Dr. Yuri’s mention as a cue to leave. Ezra and Jena kept up with her as she ran through the labyrinthine complex, into the Compatibility labs, and down the office hallways. Jena had begun to cry, and still it was her who tugged Ezra by the hand like he would stay behind otherwise.

All three of them were short of breath when they reached Dr. Yuri’s office. Erin knocked. “Hello? Dr. Logan?” She took a couple deep breaths. “Hello, are you in there?”

There was no answer. Ezra walked next to Erin as she opened the door.

First, he thought Dr. Yuri was not in his office, as the desk was empty. But as the door came open, he saw his feet, then his legs. The stench.

The doctor was lying on the floor. Erin reflexively screamed: “We need a medic!”

Ezra was too shocked too follow her into the office, and froze completely when the image of an enormous puddle of blood underneath the man came into view.

“Go get a medic!” Erin yelled again, at him.

It was Jena who ran off. Ezra could only watch as Erin began to cry out after discovering the gunshot wound in the dead man’s chest, staining her hands with blood.

After all, tomorrow wouldn’t come.

Chapter 21

Flight

Erin’s knees were wet with Dr. Logan’s blood
. As were her hands. She wanted to use them to wipe her tears, but she didn’t want his blood on her face as well. Erin had seen death before, but seeing this man’s face, frozen in horror, was more upsetting than any previous encounter. She knew this man. She had wept in front of this man. Taken orders from him. Learned from him.

“Erin,” Ezra said from the doorway.

“How?” she said, looking at the hole in Dr. Logan’s chest. “Who carries a
gun
in Zenith? Was it one of the military—?”

“Oh god.” She heard Garros’ voice, and it was immediately reassuring. She got up and went to him. He hugged her, and she finally took her eyes from the cadaver. His voice rumbled in his chest as he spoke. “What happened—
who did this
?”

Ezra walked into the room, looking at the body like it was a dangerous animal, and made his way to Dr. Logan’s desk. “Ezra, don’t touch anything.”

She saw Ezra open a drawer, and his eyes went wide. “It’s gone,” the kid said.

“What’s gone?”

“The gun, he—” Ezra stammered. “Dr. Yuri had a gun in this drawer. He showed it to me two days ago. He threatened to kill himself in front of me.”

“What?” Garros said. “What are you talking about? Why didn’t you say something?”

“He
didn’t
kill himself!” Erin said. “Look at the wound in his chest! Look at his face! And
where is the gun
?”

Jena returned with two medics, and it was then that Erin had to push her way out of the room, plowing through the crowd that had begun to gather in the hallway, drawn by the chaos. Garros went after her, and helped wipe the blood from her hands with a tissue. “Where’s Ezra?”

“I’m right here!” Ezra said, followed by Jena.

“Jena, I need you to find Poole and stay in your dormitories; we’ll come find you later. Ezra, come with us,” she said and walked away, towards Administration.

Erin opened the door to her office, the small private study in the administration wing that she had barely used. Despite her initial intentions, the place was still covered in Alice’s trinkets; she had found it too difficult to remove them. Garros closed the door behind him, sealing the trio inside. “Ezra, what kind of gun was it?”

“Uh . . . a gray one.”

Hands shaking, Erin cleaned away all the remains of Dr. Logan’s blood from her skin using a box of tissues and bottled water, knowing she’d need a change of clothes soon. “You said you talked to Akiva. What did he tell you?”

“Nothing,” he said. “Just that he had a meeting with Dr. Yuri. There was something he wanted to tell Akiva, but I don’t know. Erin, I don’t think Akiva would—”

“Don’t say what he would or wouldn’t do,” Garros interrupted. “You saw him after the accident. He’s off his damn rocker. He’s violent. And he’s missing. His Creux is gone! He’s ruined your mother’s whole plan for all of Zenith.”

“No, he hasn’t done that yet,” Erin said, and looked at a picture Alice kept on her desk, one of the few ones that didn’t include a lion. The Creux Defense Squad one year before, when Juliana was leader, and she and Alice were still alive. “Garros, we’re going to have to go after him.”

“He
took his Creux
,” Garros repeated, giving prompt emphasis to every single word, as if trying to explain a simple concept to a dull child. “He’s new to piloting, but if he’s inside Milos Ravana, and he doesn’t want to be caught, we both know that we won’t be able to do a damned thing.”

Erin scratched the back of her head, wishing Alice was there to lead them.

She knew Garros was right; Akiva was unstoppable inside Milos Ravana. “We don’t need to fight him; we need him
back
. Garros, we might need to leave sooner than we expected. Maybe as soon as
right now
. We can’t let Akiva get away.” Erin saw Ezra become visibly agitated.

“What are your orders?” Garros asked.

“Get Barnes and Kat and tell them that there was a change of plans. Tell them to make sure Atlas, Ares, and Nandi are ready to go at any moment’s notice,” she said. “I’ll talk with Director Blanchard but I don’t think we’re going to stick around much longer.”

“What about—I thought someone else was coming with us,” Ezra said.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I haven’t decided between Poole and Jena; I was supposed to review their performances later today to make a decision.”

“You don’t need to. Poole is a better pilot,” Garros said.