The Arrangement 6 (7 page)

CHAPTER
13

After
Sean does a few more shots he takes me up to the room. When Sean opens the door, I understand why he stalled at the bar. The room is filled with roses and flickering candles. There’s a candelabra on the table, washing the room in golden light. Little tea candles are scattered everywhere. Red rose petals are all over the floor and bed. There’s an enormous bouquet of red roses in a vase on the dresser.

I turn and look at Sean, completely surprised. “What is this?”

He smiles softly, suddenly shy. “I thought you’d like it, that’s all.”

“I’m a call girl. I’ll put out without the flowers and candles.”

“I’m a romantic—or I used to be—and I wanted to see your face when you walked into the room. I wanted you to know that I’ll go through with this, with anything you want. In fact, I’ll trade you—anything I want for anything you want.” Sean’s eyes slip from my face to my dress. It has a low neckline. He presses a kiss to my cheek and lowers his lashes. My heart shudders.

What is he doing? The candles and roses throw me off. People say Sean’s cruel. Everyone says that, but I don’t see it. I wonder what I’m missing. I wonder if I already see the man they don’t realize
exists. I glance up at him. “So it’s a trade? We’ll do exactly what I want for exactly what you want?” He nods. “What does your fetish entail exactly?”

Sean holds my gaze making my stomach flip. He watches me like I’ll fade away. He doesn’t blink. “Control. I want you, Avery. In every way possible. I want
you to quit working for Black. I want you to be with me.”

Shock lines my face. “What did you say?”

“I mean it. I want to take care of you. I want you to be with me. I won’t share you.”

“Then why did you hire me? Why didn’t you
just ask me this the other day?” I think he’s toying with me. I’m lost somewhere between being angry and hopeful.

Sean’
s lips twitch before smiling softly. “Because you wouldn’t have come, you wouldn’t have believed me. I’ll give you anything I can if you really want to be with me.”

“What about Black? I can’t quit.”

His gaze narrows, becoming more intense. “I can’t share you. I won’t share you. As it is, I want break Thomas for touching you. I’ll pay for whatever you need.”

In a million years, I never expected him to say something like that.
“Sean, I can’t—”

He presses a finger to my lips. “Don’t answer now. It’s possible that you won’t like what you see here this weekend. It’s possible you’ll never come back, but if you want to stay…” he takes a deep breath and leans in closer to me. Sean’s lips are so close to mine. My body tingles
, anticipating his touch.

I’m shaken. There are two versions of this man and I can’t tell which one is real. Clearing my throat, I stammer,
“Who goes first? I mean, do we do things your way or mine?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” I shake my
head. Sean smiles like he completely adores me. “We’ll do things your way first, Avery. Anything you want.”

CHAPTER
14

I’m lost in his gaze. I can’t stop falling.
Everyone thinks he’ll destroy me. They think he’s going down in flames. I’m not stupid enough to think I can save Sean, but I’m in the same spot in my life. Everything I ever wanted has been blasted to bits. He’s the only one who truly understands what it means to be alone and have everything ripped away.

Sean is an island an
d for some reason he wants me. Time stops and neither of us moves. Sean’s breath is warm.  It passes over my lips in a gentle breeze. If I lean in and kiss him I’ll start something I can’t back out of. My heart races faster and faster. There’s not enough air, there’s never enough around this man.  If I step over this line, there’s no going back. Nerves shoot through my body and I suck in a shaky breath.

Sean watches me through thick lashes. He presses his forehead to mine. His hand strokes my cheek gently and I lean into his touch. “We don’t have to do anything, Avery. We don’t—”

I don’t let him finish talking. Part of me wants to combust. I want to know, without a doubt, that I’m still alive. I don’t want to be numb all the time. I want to feel and touch and be felt. My lips press into his. Sean stops talking and holds my face between his hands. He tilts my head and sweeps his tongue over the seam of my lips. I want to feel everything. I want to feel lust, passion, and fear. I want whatever is on the other side of this.

I hear Mel’s voice in the back of my head,
It’ll change you
. I hope to God it does. I can’t live like this anymore. Most days I feel completely miserable, like I’ll never get on with my life.

Sean is kissing me gently as thoughts swirl in my head. They keep coming back to one thing. I can’t get through tonight without knowing what tomorrow night hold
s. Breaking the kiss, I pull away breathless. “I want things your way first.”

Sean has that lusty look in his eye. He drinks me in. It makes my stomach twist. “No.”

I smile at him and tug on his tie. “Yes.” I lean forward and press my lips lightly to his. The touch is so light, so brief that it sends shivers through me.

Sean takes a jagged breath. His eyes are on my lips, wanting more. When he flicks his eyes up, our gaz
es lock, he says, “No Avery. I want to make sure—“

“So do I. Take me the way you wanted
, the way you tried to before.”

He’s breathing hard, watching me. “I’m not the same man I was before.” I don’t understand. I shake my head ever so slightly. “I told you there was nothing left to save, that I was screwed up beyond
comprehension. I was. There was nothing left worth saving, but then you came along in your crappy car. You fight for every breath you take and you don’t back down. I admire that. I admire you, but it’s so much more. I was so far gone that I didn’t see it, I didn’t know I could feel that way again.”

My heart
starts thumping harder. A shiver climbs up my back and coats my entire body. Is he saying what I think he’s saying? “Sean—”

He presses his finger to my lips and silences me.
Swallowing hard, he looks up at me. “I regret not saying things in the past. I regret masking my feelings for you. I regret lying to myself, and too many other things to name.

“Avery, I’m so far gone. There’s nothing left to love. When you said you loved me, I don’t know, it was like I was being attacked. I reacted wrong, but I couldn’t stop. No one has loved me, not since Amanda, and not like this.” His gaze bores into mine. It’s so intense that it makes me squirm.
Sean’s eyes drift to my lips and back to my eyes. I feel like the world has stopped spinning and I’m floating away. This can’t be real.

Sean presses his lips together and smiles at me. “I love you. I love the way you think, the way you blurt out whatever’s in your head. I love
the way you fly a kite. I love being with you on the beach. I love the way you chased down your car, ready beat the crap out of the guy who stole it. I love that you talk to your parents even though they’re gone. I love your fascination with the cold. I love the snowmen. I love that you’ll do anything and everything to survive. You’re everything wonderful in my life and I don’t deserve any of it. I love you, Avery.”

Holy shit
. Did he say really that? My throat is so tight. It feels like there’s an elephant sitting on my windpipe. I can’t even choke out a response. I just stand there with my mouth hanging open and my eyebrows creeping up into my hairline.

Sean ta
ngles his fingers in my hair, and looks at me from under his lashes. He leans in close so we’re almost lip to lip. He breathes, “You scare the hell out of me.”

My voice comes out breathy. “Likewise, Mr. Jones
.”

He grins.
“I don’t know what I want anymore, Miss Smith. My life hasn’t turned out the way I planned. The only thing I know beyond a shadow of a doubt is that I want you.”

Butterflies flutter through my chest. This can’t be happening. It can’t be. I blink a few times and wonder if I’m dreaming, but my nightmare
s are never like this. Looking into Sean’s face, I need to know. Something happened to his wife and baby. What Gabe said couldn’t be true, but I have to know.

My eyes drop to his tie. I stare at it like
it’s an anchor. I have to ask, but how do I ask him something like that? How can I even mention it now? He said he loves me. I should kiss him and squeal with glee. Instead, these dark thoughts linger and make me question everything.

“Sean…” I
whisper his name. Licking my lips, I look up into his face. Every ounce of hope is dashed when he sees my expression. It’s like he already knows my question. “Everyone says you’re not a person to mess around with, that I should leave you and never look back. They say you’re ruthless and coldhearted. I never understood why. I don’t see it. Then, I heard something… I have to ask. What happened to Amanda and the baby?”

A current of cold dread runs through my stomac
h. Sean is so tense. His face loses any trace of the man I was talking to. It becomes a blank slate. Fear flashes in his eyes when looks back at me. “If you’re asking that, you already know.” He pulls away from me. I watch him walk over to the window and look out at the city. Sean stares vacantly.

I follow him across the room. “What I heard couldn’t possibly be true. It doesn’t make any sense. I see the way you mourn. You g
rief is as palpable as mine.”

“No,
it’s not. My grief is nothing like yours.” He turns suddenly and our gazes lock. Wild terror burns behind his eyes like he’s lost in a horrific memory. Sean steps toward me. “What you heard is true. I killed my wife.”

COMING SOON:

THE ARRANGEMENT VOL 7

*****

THE ARRANGEMENT SERIES

This story unfolds over the course of multiple short novels. Each one follows the continuing story of Avery Stanz and Sean Ferro.

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THE SECRET LIFE OF TRYSTAN SCOTT

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