The Art of Life (101 page)

               
When
I get to school, I am a nervous wreck.
 
I
can’t pay attention in any of my classes.
 
Between fourth and fifth period, my phone goes off.
 
It is a text from Jeremy: Do you have plans
tonight?

               
Frowning,
I text: Kind of
have
something in mind, why?

               
Just
curious, is his text back.
 
The next text
says:
 
I will see you later then.

               
Confused,
I text: Okay.
 
And that is the end of the
conversation.
 
That was a little
bizarre.
 
Well, if he thinks I have plans
and isn’t home, then I can cook dinner and have it all ready when he finally
gets there.
 
Now, that is a good idea.

               
So,
after school, I go to the store and get all the ingredients.
 
As I suspected, Jeremy isn’t home when I get
there.
 
So, I immediately get to work.
 
Making
a lasagna
is
not a quick thing.
 
When
I finally put it in the oven, I go into the bathroom to check myself out.
 
I am not going to go over the top, but I want
to actually look somewhat desirable.

               
After
that is all done, I go into the kitchen to check on the lasagna.
 
As I am closing the oven, I hear the door
open.
 
I turn around and smile, and then
freeze.
 
Jeremy is walking in…..with a
girl.
 
Please lord, shoot me now.

               
Jeremy
looks at me a little surprised.
 
“I
wasn’t sure if you were going to be home.”

               
I
can’t even say anything.
 
Finally, I
whisper, “No, I am.”

               
He
looks into the kitchen.
 
“Wow…..you are
making a huge dinner.
 
Did I forget about
something?”

               
“No,”
I reply, trying not to choke on my words.

               
“Are
you okay?” Jeremy asks, looking at me with a serious face.

               
Nodding
vigorously, I answer, “Yeah.”
 
My hands
start to shake, so I grip them tightly together.
  
“Umm, I didn’t know....you…were having
company over.”
 
Pointing to the oven, I
stutter, “I, uh, just wanted this for dinner, so I made it.”
 
My chest is tightening more and more as the
seconds pass.
 
“You guys are more than
welcome to eat with me.”

               
“Oh,”
Jeremy says slowly.
 
“Umm, we….”

               
“Yeah,”
I exclaim.
 
“How stupid
of me.
 
Of course you have
plans.
 
You know what, this has to cook
for another half an hour and then after that it has to cool.”
 
I start choking on my words, so I start to
speak rapidly.
 
“I will go in my room, so
you can have privacy.
 
If you leave
before the lasagna is done, let me know, but if the timer goes off, just take
it out.”
 
The tears start welling
up.
 
“So, I will give you some
privacy.
 
Excuse me.”
 
I brush past Jeremy and go into my bedroom,
slamming the door.
 
Immediately, the
tightness in my chest breaks and I start to cry.

               
How
could I have been so stupid!?
 
What was I
thinking?
 
I was right.
 
How could Jeremy ever be interested in
me?
 
How could he ever be in love with
me?

               
There
is a knock on the door, and I hear Jeremy.
 
“Isabelle?”

               
“What?”
I gasp, trying to sound okay.

               
“Can
I come in?” He asks.

               
I
shake my head, even though he can’t see me.
 
“No, please just go do your thing.
 
I need time to myself.”

               
“Isabelle,”
he says seriously.
 
“Open the door.”

               
“No,
Jeremy please, just go,” I plead.

               
Ignoring
me, he opens my door and walks in.
 
As he
shuts the door again, Jeremy asks, “What is wrong?”
 
When he looks up and sees me, his facial
expression suddenly looks concerned.
 
“Izzy, what’s wrong?
 
Why are you
crying?”

               
“Please
Jeremy, just leave.
 
I can’t do this,
please just go.
 
I need to be by myself,
okay?”

               
He
looks at me thoughtfully.
  
“What have
you been hiding from me?”

               
“Nothing,”
I spit out between breaths.
 
“Please,
Jeremy, just go back out there!”

               
“Did
something happen with Eric?”

               
Somewhat
laughing and choking at the same time, I say, “It has nothing to do with
Eric.
 
I came to the realization of
something, but in the end just realized I am an idiot.”

               
Jeremy
looks at me seriously.
 
“Isabelle, talk
to me.
 
Tell me what is wrong.”

               
“Jeremy,”
I cry.
 
“I can’t do this.
 
I can’t tell you this one thing.
 
Please, just leave it alone.”

               
His
facial expression changes again.
 
“Isabelle,” he says quietly.
 
“Just tell me.
 
You need to tell
me.”

               
“I…”
I start.
 
“I…just.”
 
Shaking my head, I stutter, “I am sorry, but
this one thing, this one thing I can never say to you.
 
I will never let it come out.
 
Just please, leave it alone.”

               
“No,
Isabelle,” he articulates, stepping forward.
 
“Say it.”

               
With
my heart breaking, I exclaim, “I can’t!
 
I can’t!
  
Please, just let me
be
!”
 
I quickly push
past him and run out of my room.
 
I go
into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me.
 
Now sobbing, I put my face in my hands and cry.
 
A minute goes by and then the bathroom door
opens.
 
“Jeremy!” I gasp.
 
“What are you doing!?”

               
“Coming
in here,” he replies, shutting the door.

               
I
shake my head and wipe the tears away.
  
“What if I was going to the bathroom!?”

               
“Well,
you aren’t.
 
I knew that.”

               
“You
have a date out there.
 
You can’t be in
the bathroom with me!” I hiss.

               
He
nods his head to the side.
 
“She is a
guest and a guest is to be entertained.
 
The TV is on, so she is fine.”

               
Crying,
I say, “What are you doing in here?”

               
Suddenly,
his eyes are very serious.
 
“I HAD to
come, because…..there is something I love very much in here.”

               
“Oh
my god,” I gasp, covering my face.
 
“Please, right now, don’t say that.
 
This very moment, don’t say that.”

               
“Isabelle,”
he whispers.
 
I pull my hand away and look
at him, with tears streaming down my face.
 
“Listen to me.”
 
Jeremy takes a step
so that he is right in front of me.
 
Breathlessly close, he whispers, “There is something in this bathroom
that I love.”

               
Quickly,
I back away and hit the counter.
 
“Jeremy, please,
stop
.”

               
He
chuckles and steps forward again.
 
Our
bodies are touching now and I can feel the heat of his breath on my skin.
 
I start to say something, and he puts his
finger on my lips.
 
“
Shhhh
,
listen to me.
 
There is something in this
bathroom that I love very much.”
 
I
actually whimper at those words.
 
Jeremy
looks me right in the eyes, and says, “I am….in love….with something in this
bathroom.”

               
With
those words, I stop breathing.
 
“What?” I
whisper.

               
Jeremy
gives me a gentle smile.
 
“I am in
love…..” he murmurs, bringing his face towards mine.
 
“I am in love…..with this toothpaste,” he
says, reaching behind me.

               
That
is not what I was expecting.
  
In shock,
I turn to look where Jeremy is reaching.
 
When I see nothing there, and watch his hand plant on the counter, I
look back at him, and in that second, his lips are on mine.
 
It is perfect and like it should be,
everything falling into place.
 
Every
second that our lips are touching, my heart grows bigger.
 
I press myself against him, as hard as I
can.
 

Time feels like minutes but
is probably just seconds.
 
When Jeremy
finally pulls away, he whispers, “Isabelle, I am in love with you.”

               
As
if it were the easiest thing to say, I reply, “I am in love with you, too.”

               
He
smiles and kisses me ever so gently.
 
“I
have to go do something,” he murmurs.
 
“Wait here, don’t move.”
 
With
that, he gives me another kiss and then leaves the bathroom.

               
I
stand there in shock, with my fingers pressed on my lips.
 
Happy, relieved tears are now streaming down
my face.
 
I can’t help but giggle.
 
A few minutes go by of me just waiting there.
 
Then I start to wonder where Jeremy is.
 
Another minute goes by, and now I am
frustrated.
 
Finally, I go to the
bathroom door, and whip it open.
 
Jeremy
is leaning in the doorway, with a huge grin on his face.
 
“You do not listen very well.”

               
“No,
no, I don’t,” I reply.

               
“Come
here,” he growls, as he pulls me against him tightly.

               
Jeremy
pulls me out of the bathroom without removing his lips from mine.
 
We kiss each other with a blind fury.
 
It is like the night we spent together to the
tenth magnitude.
 
He spins me around and
pushes me up against the wall.
 
Suddenly,
the one picture he has up, falls and the glass shatters.

               
We
both start laughing against each other’s lips.
 
Jeremy starts to kiss me again.
 
“Jeremy,” I giggle.
 
“We need to
clean the glass up.”

               
“Uh
huh,” he replies back, before kissing me again.
 
I give into him.
 
I move my foot a
little and I hear the glass move.
 
In one
instant I am up in Jeremy’s arms.
 
“I
can’t have you cutting your feet.”

               
“What
are you doing?” I ask, as he carries me into his room.

               
He
gets a huge grin on his face, “Nothing.”

               
“Jeremy….where
is your date?”

               
Giving
me a quizzical look, Jeremy replies, “Who said she was a date?”

               
I
look at him and respond, “She wasn’t a date?”

               
“Nope,”
Jeremy says, shaking his head.
 
“Her name
is Rita.
 
She is our receptionist at
work.
 
Her boyfriend just broke up with
her.
 
So, I thought I would bring her
home to hang out.”

               
With
an appalled look, I snap, “I got all upset because I thought she was a date!”

               
“No
offense, but I think we are both glad that you got upset.
 
Now,
shhhh
,” he
hushes, setting me down on the floor.
 
Jeremy brings his lips to mine and gives me the most sensuous kiss I
have ever experienced.
 
It actually makes
me moan.
 
I press myself up against him,
and wrap my arms around his neck.
 
We
stand there for a minute just kissing each other.
 
 
Suddenly,
I feel Jeremy’s hand go up my shirt.
 
He
starts to pull it off and I gasp, “What are you doing?”

               
All
he does is smile.
 
“Nothing.”
 
His hand moves to my pants and he undoes the
button.
 
I smack it away.
 
“
Wwwhhaaatttt
?”
Jeremy whines.

               
“What
do you think you are doing?” I inquire, buttoning my pants back up.

               
Jeremy
tugs on them again.
 
“I am taking your
clothes off.”

               
That
makes me burst out laughing.
 
“No you are
not!

               
“Really?”
He asks, “Not even a little bit?”

               
Giving
him a stern look, I say, “We haven’t even talked about what is going on.
 
We are not taking our clothes off.”

               
“I
was just making an assumption about us now.
 
I figured…you are in love with me…..I am in love with you.
 
I thought the next step was obvious.”

               
I
am trying really hard not to smirk.
 
“And
what is the next step?”

               
“One
of us is going to move into the other’s room,” he murmurs, pushing me back to
the bed.

               
“Jeremy
Stoll, we are not moving in together!”

               
He
stops and looks at me.
 
“Isabelle, I hate
to break it to you, but we already live together.
 
Now,” he says, pushing me down on the
bed.
 
“We are busy.”
 
Jeremy climbs on top of me and brings his
lips down to my neck.
 
It makes me
shiver.
 
He kisses me ever so lightly.
 
I start to move to him, but he suddenly
stops.
 
“Wait, I have a confession.”

               
“What?”
I gasp.

               
Propping
himself over me, Jeremy looks down.
 
“I
have a confession.
 
I have lied to you
two times.”

               
“What
do you mean?” I ask hesitantly.

               
“The
second one you know about, the whole me having a date on the night of your
formal.
 
The first one though, the first
lie I told you was the morning I came forth with all the information about
Kaitlin.”

               
My
mind blanks.
 
“You made Kaitlin up?”

               
“No,”
he chuckles.
 
“I don’t want you to be
mad, just listen, okay?”
 
I nod.
 
He takes a deep breath.
 
“I remembered.
 
I remember…..everything.”
 
With
those words my jaw drops.
 
“Before you
get mad, hear me out.
 
I was devastated
about Kaitlin.
 
She was my best friend
and then she was gone.
 
Every year on
that day, it was just a reminder.
 
Yes, I
was drunk, but the whole night, all I could think about was you.”

               
“You
brought home another girl Jeremy,” I state, totally not amused.

               
Jeremy
bows his head.
 
“I wouldn’t admit to
myself how I felt.
 
I had refused to open
myself to anyone again.
 
So, I did what
my male ego thought I should do, bring a girl home.
 
It was fine, I was drunk as a skunk, but when
you turned on the light and I saw your face, my stomach dropped.
 
You didn’t look mad, just shocked and
somewhat hurt.
 
You might as well have
ripped my heart out.
 
I felt so bad.
 
I asked the girl to go home….very
nicely.
 
Then I walked to your door.
 
I actually stood there for a minute
deliberating on what I should do, but let me tell you, when you are drunk, your
inhibitions go out the window.
 
And well,
you know the rest.”

               
“I
do not know the rest!” I snap.
 
“Why did
you lie to me?
 
Do you know how much that
hurt, you ass!”

               
With
very pleading eyes, Jeremy exclaims, “Isabelle!
 
I didn’t want you to think I took advantage of you.
 
I also never thought in a million years you
would have feelings for me!”

               
“What!?
 
Why wouldn’t
I have feelings for you!?
 
Have you seen
yourself or met yourself?”

               
Raising
his eyebrow, Jeremy retorts, “When did you realize you were in love with
me?”
 
I shut my mouth quickly.
 
He narrows his eyes.
 
“Isabelle, when did you figure out you were
in love with me.”

               
“I
have been in love with you since the beginning I think,” I whisper.

               
“And
why did YOU never say anything?” he asks with a grin.

               
Pouting,
I reply, “I don’t know.
 
I didn’t even
REALIZE it until last night.”

               
“Wait…..on your date?
 
WHOA, you need to elaborate!” Jeremy exclaims, rolling to the side and
lying next to me.
 
He looks at me with a
very mischievous smile.
 
“I need to hear
this.”

               
“It
was horrible!
 
Poor Eric, he is the one
who pointed it out to me!”

               
Of
course, Jeremy thinks this is funny.
 
“Was the date that bad?”

               
“No,
not at all,” I answer.

               
With
a frown, Jeremy replies, “Okay, didn’t need to hear that.”

               
“It
ended badly though.
 
He stopped me, said
you know you are in love with Jeremy.
 
I
denied it and argued about it.
 
So, you
want to know how he proved
it?
”

               
“How?”
Jeremy asks.

               
“He
kissed me and then asked who I was thinking about,” I say quietly.

               
Snorting,
Jeremy tries to contain his laughter.
 
“You honestly thought about me when kissing another guy.”

               
I
glare at him.
 
“It’s not funny.
 
I am sorry I am not what you think about when
you kiss other girls.”

               
“You
are actually what I think about when I kiss other girls,” Jeremy whispers.
 
“Especially at the club, it was tearing me up
that you had to see that.
 
That’s why I
danced with her.
 
You were so adamant
that I do it, that I figured you didn’t care at all.”

               
“That
was probably one of the suckiest moments of my life,” I admit.

               
Jeremy
takes his finger and traces little circles on my arm.
 
“But I was in love with you, so madly in
love.”

               
“So,
what does this mean for us?” I ask quietly.

               
“I
would think that the obvious option is for us to be together, unless you don’t
want to be with me?”

               
Rolling
over to face him, I whisper, “Of course I want to be with you, but…..I am
worried that you are not as in love with me, as I am with you.
 
Look at me.
 
There are much prettier girls out there.
 
You may grow tired of me after a while, and then what will we be?
 
I don’t want to lose you as a friend
or….boyfriend.”

               
Jeremy
rolls me back over and props himself over me.
 
“There isn’t a girl on this planet that would make me change my
mind.
 
I don’t open myself up for anyone,
but you, Isabelle, have me wide open.
 
You have my entire heart in the palms of your hands.
 
I am going to trust you not to break it.”

               
“I
would never,” I whisper, “But I expect the same out of you.”

               
“I
promise to always protect you and be there for you.
 
I am in love with you and would never do
anything to hurt you.
 
Now, since we are
past all that, and now you are my girlfriend, there is something I have thought
about every day, multiple times a day.”

               
“What’s
that?” I ask.

               
He
bends down so our lips are an inch apart.
 
“I remember every touch and kiss of that night, and I would like to
relive it, if not outdo it.”

               
I
wrap my arms around his neck and whisper, “I think we can do that.”
 
With a grin, Jeremy kisses me.
 
It is soft and delicate at first, but then
turns heated.

               
Sometime
later, Jeremy stops and pulls back.
 
“What in the world is that noise?”

               
Suddenly,
I push him off.
 
“The
lasagna!”
 
I jump up and dash out
into the kitchen.
 
Coming up to the
glass, I jump over it.
 
When I get into
the kitchen, I whip the oven door open and check the lasagna.
 
“Thank God,
it’s
fine.”

               
“That
looks really good,” Jeremy states, as I pull it out of the oven.
 
As I set the lasagna on the counter, he comes
and wraps his arms around my waist.
 
His
breath is hot on my neck.
 
“There is
something much more appetizing though.”