Authors: Laura Marie Altom
“What are we doing?” she asked, her voice a breathless half version of her normal self.
“Wish I had an answer. All I know is that life stops hurting when I’m around you.”
His words were a perfect encapsulation of what she’d wanted to say. For so long she’d done everything on her own, and had managed just fine. Managed. Only just now did she get the vast difference between getting along and thriving. But she’d already put her trust in a man, and look where that had left her. Yes, Tag was nothing like Phil, and they did share Flynn, but that didn’t mean their road couldn’t be filled with potholes.
“Say something,” he requested.
“I can’t.” It hurt too badly—the knowledge that whether she wanted to or not, her heart could be setting her up for another fall.
“Why?”
Inching still closer to him, she said, “I’m tired. Do we have to have this conversation tonight?”
“I guess not. But if not now, when?”
“I have an opening next week, Tuesday.” She flipped over, molding her backside to him, taking his hand and cupping it to her tummy. His radiant heat scorched her in a wonderful way. When she’d been pregnant, how many nights had she lain dreaming of someone holding her this way? Protecting her? Making her feel that no matter what life threw at her, everything would be okay? On
the outside she portrayed the tough lady lawyer, but on the inside she was tired of being strong. “Want me to pencil you in?”
“W
HAT’S GOT YOU
in such a good mood?” Alice asked while Tag whistled his way into his office a week later on a Monday morning.
“High on life,” he said, tossing his briefcase on the floor beside his desk. “What’ve you got for me?”
“A video conference, eighteen contracts to go over, lunch with your brothers and signing payroll checks.”
“Great.” He sat in his comfy leather chair, snapping open the
Wall Street Journal
Alice laid out for him every morning. “Do I have a few minutes for a quick personal call?”
“I suppose,” she said. “But I need you in the conference room no later than nine-fifteen.”
“Will do,” he said, already reaching for the phone.
With Alice out of the room, he punched in Liv’s cell. “Good morning,” he said when she answered on the second ring. “You ever find the munchkin’s favorite teething hippo?”
“Yes, sir,” she said, sounding out of breath. “Under the breakfast-nook table. He must’ve pitched it along with his teething cookies.”
“Where are you?” he asked, trying to suppress a mental image of one of her short, all-business skirts riding up to expose her thighs.
“On my way into the courthouse. I’ve got a pretrial
meeting in fifteen minutes.” In the background was the grumble of a passing truck.
“Is he a good-looking client?” he teased.
“Point of fact,
he’s
a
she
.”
“Oh. Is she hot?”
Liv laughed. “You’re incorrigible. And a flirt.”
After a long pause he said, “Sorry. I thought we were just fooling around.”
“We are, but I’m not your girlfriend, Tag. At least, I’m not supposed to be.”
“Right. I’m bad.”
“True. Which is why I’m hanging up.”
“Not yet.” Playing with the desktop pool game a coworker had given him for his last birthday, he asked, “Want to give Tabitha a try tonight and go out for grown-up dinner?”
“Sounds highly tempting. Mind if I give you an answer after I see how the day pans out?”
“Not at all. I’ll tentatively add you to my schedule.”
“I’m honored,” she teased.
“You should be,” he teased right back. “Did Flynn ever get over his morning grumpies?”
“Right after he fell into the arms of his love, Mrs. Nelson.”
“Ah, the infamous Mrs. Nelson.” Chuckling over his son’s adoration of the buxom blonde at his day care, Tag said, “Wish I’d had more teachers like her.”
“On that note,” Liv said with a laughing tone, “I really am hanging up.”
When she did just that, Tag smiled all the more.
Liv’s sense of humor was one of his favorite things about her. Of course, he also liked her hair. Especially at night when she left it down.
Since that one time he’d fallen asleep in Liv’s bed, Tag had been careful not to put himself in that kind of inappropriate situation again. He and Liv were friends. The last thing he wanted was to send out signals they were more.
Now, most nights after Flynn had settled off to sleep, Tag and Liv retreated to the family room adjacent to the kitchen. They talked about everything from sports and movies and house maintenance to what their hopes and aspirations were for their son’s life.
Tag wanted him to take over the family oil business.
Liv thought that was a fine goal, but that he first needed a top-notch education.
Tag agreed.
In fact, lately they seemed to agree on lots of things. The only thing troubling him about their relationship was the nagging fact that the more he was around her, the more dependent upon her he grew. Whether it was seeking her opinion on the color of his morning tie or having the lawn man plant purple pansies, white or a mix of both, he found himself searching for reasons to be with her.
As for your compulsion to also be touching her?
What could he say? He’d always been a hugger.
That lone, hot kiss was hardly your garden-variety hug.
True, but what harm did it do for him to be close to his son’s mother? Kids sensed that sort of thing, didn’t they? Tension between their parents.
So, see? Tag wasn’t in the habit of sitting extra close to Liv for his own benefit, but that of his son. It was only natural for friends to be near each other, but on his honor, no more kissing. Tag wasn’t about to take his attraction a step further.
“What’s that smile about?” Dane asked Olivia as she closed her flip phone in the courthouse lobby.
How did she explain something she didn’t even understand? “Tag’s always horsing around.”
“He makes you laugh?” Dane held open the door to the snack bar where they purchased morning coffee when they were running too late to get real coffee from Morgan’s.
“All the time,” she said, standing at the end of a four-deep line. “He’s like a ten-year-old in a grown man’s body.”
“Gabrielle says you two are inseparable.”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” She moved up in line. “But in caring for Flynn, we understandably spend a lot of time with each other.”
Expression somber, he nodded.
“What’s that look mean?”
“Just that my wife’s worried about you, and you know how she gets when she’s in worrywart mode.” Fishing a
five from his wallet, he said, “Call her, okay? She says she hasn’t heard from you in forever.”
“More like two days,” Olivia said with a shake of her head. “But as soon as I get a break, I’ll check in.”
“Thanks,” Dane said, planting a brotherly kiss to the crown of her head. “That’s all I ask.”
Hours later, after examining witnesses on a heartbreaking domestic abuse case in which the wife claimed self-defense and the district attorney claimed murder, Olivia picked up Flynn from school, then made the twenty-five-minute drive home.
Home.
Funny how that used to mean the house she was still paying the mortgage on, but now it had taken on an entirely new connotation.
Pressing the automatic garage-door opener, she’d never been happier to see Tag’s SUV on his side of the garage. Better yet, once she turned off her engine, he strolled out of the house’s mudroom door with a glass of white wine in hand. “You’re late. I figured you might need this.”
“Bless you,” she said, taking the glass while he headed around to the car’s passenger side to scoop Flynn from his safety seat.
“Hey, little man,” Tag crooned. “I missed you. Did you miss me?”
Flynn gurgled with an excited buck.
Beaming, Tag said, “I’ll take that as a yes.” To Olivia he asked, “Want me to get your purse and briefcase?”
“Leave ’em.” In the house, she kicked off her heels and said, “Days like this make me crave an early retirement.”
“Would I be safe in assuming Tabitha will have the night off?”
Her answer was to close her eyes and sigh.
“Want to tell me about it?” When Tag closed the door, she felt as if he’d also shut out the weight of the world. As if here, in their own universe, nothing could bring them down. “I made that cream cheese crab dip you like.”
“Can I eat it while you rub my feet?”
“Demanding wench, aren’t you?” Snatching her up in a hug, he made a growling noise while nuzzling her neck.
Sandwiched between them, Flynn gurgled and cooed.
A
FTER A SIMPLE DINNER
of grilled chicken and asparagus, then sharing Flynn’s bath time and putting him in his crib, Tag led Liv out to the hot tub, baby monitor in hand. It had been a beautiful day with temperatures in the high seventies, but now it was chilly, making the 102-degree water feel perfect.
“This is nice,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder.
“I concur.” He slipped his arm around her, loving the feel of her pliant curves against his hard planes. “So? Out with it. What happened in court?”
“It was awful. I’m pretty sure it’s a slam dunk for my
team, but the crime-scene photos have the jury squirming. It floors me how the D.A. even had the nerve to bring this to trial. My client was so badly beaten her eyes were swollen closed. She had three broken ribs, a punctured lung and concussion. Her only means of defense was the pan of fried chicken cooking on the stove. She slung it at him, and happened to get lucky. The bastard went down. End of story.”
“Holy crap.” Rubbing her shoulders, he said, “I hate thinking of you immersed in that kind of violence all day.”
“Me, too, but someone’s got to do it. This poor woman has three kids. Think of Flynn being trapped in that kind of toxic environment.”
Tag rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. “That’s an image I’d rather not imagine. Come here, you.” He hefted her onto his lap, smoothing her hair back from her face. “I missed you today.”
“I missed you, too,” she said, toying with the dark curls on his chest. Her simple movement was causing problems beneath the bubbles.
Trying not to think about how attractive she was, he said, “I had lunch with my brothers.”
“Oh?” She wriggled to change positions, in the process making her full breasts nearly burst from her bikini top. New? For his benefit?
He changed positions accordingly. “They want to meet you. Think it would be okay if we had their families and my sister’s over for barbecue Saturday afternoon?”
“Sure. Sounds fun. How about I ask my crew over, too? Dane hit me up in the courthouse lobby today about how worried my friend Gabby is about me.”
“Why?”
“I used to hang out with the girls all the time, but now I’m always with you.”
“That’s because I’m s-o-o-o good-looking. How could you resist?”
That comment earned him a swat.
“Watch it,” he complained, circling her wrists.
“You need to watch your sass.” She playfully kissed his nose.
He growled—it took every ounce of willpower he had not to grab her and kiss her senseless.
“I’ll bet you were a hellion in high school.”
“You know it.”
“And college?” She kissed his throat.
“Worse.” When she raised her face level with his, her breath smelled so good his insides felt as if they were on fire.
For the longest time he stared into her eyes. “What have you done to me?”
“Nothing more than you have me.” Leaner closer, closer, she let her lips hover above his, mingling their exhalations. “Do you want this?”
“Yeah,” he said in a guttural voice he didn’t even recognize as his own. “Hell, yeah.” Pressing his lips to hers, he felt as if he were melting. And falling. Emerging from a long, dark tunnel into her light.
Deeper and deeper he kissed.
Further and further he fell.
Easing his fingers into the hair at the back of her head, he pressed her closer still, loving her soft groans.
Off came her top, and her breasts mounded against him.
Shifting positions, she straddled his lap, leaving no mystery as to where this was heading. Both were breathing heavily and the water’s heat combined with his own internal fire, leaving him dazed and confused and hard with wanting.
On autopilot, he shimmied free of his swim trunks.
Losing her bikini bottom was no big issue.
He was too hot, so with a swoosh of water he lifted her out of the hot tub to position her on the nearest cushioned lounge chair. The rock grotto was their own private paradise, complete with chirping crickets he could hardly hear above his racing pulse.
He held off as long as he could, until her nails pressed into his back and she cried out with pleasure. His release hit like a rogue wave, slamming him with emotion he wasn’t equipped to handle.
Her arms around his neck, she was still close enough for him to feel her pounding heart.
She wasn’t alone. His heart felt ready to burst. Not good, considering his vow to keep their relationship platonic. What had he done? Gently he nudged her away. “I, um, guess we should check on Flynn.”
“You all right?” Olivia asked in the awkward silence
after they’d both found their bathing suits and wrapped themselves in towels taken from an outside storage cabinet.
“Sure.” He held open the game-room door for her to step inside. Understandably, it was a little chilly for kissing and cuddling outside, she thought, but would it be too much to ask after having just made love for him to at least speak in more than one-syllable sentences?
“Tired?”
“Yep.” He picked up the baby monitor and turned off the downstairs lights. “Ready for bed?”
On the still brightly lit stairs she said, “You’re mad because you just cheated on Maria, aren’t you?”
“You’re being ridiculous.” He tried brushing past her, but she wasn’t letting him get away that easily.
“Am I, Tag? Then why, when we just shared something amazing, are you now being such a jerk?”
Tilting his head back in obvious annoyance, he said, “We’re dripping all over the carpet. And anyway, this isn’t really something I want to talk about.”
“Oh, that’s just great. I still feel you inside me, but I don’t deserve to know why you’re now acting nuts?”
He shrugged and walked up the stairs.
Fury didn’t begin to describe the feelings coursing through her. Why was Tag doing this? She wasn’t a fool. He’d been just as into her as she was him. Their act had been what they’d both wanted.
She wanted to chase him, yelling her frustration. But
knowing him as she did, all that would accomplish was shutting him down further.
At the top of the stairs she flicked off the light and went to her room.
She checked on Flynn and found him sleeping soundly.
In the shower she remembered that Tag had the baby monitor, so she hurried in case Flynn woke. He didn’t, which almost disappointed her, since she could’ve used the distraction.
“L
OOK
,” T
AG SAID
the next morning when Liv hadn’t spoken a word to him through eating a bowl of cereal and a banana, “I’m sorry, okay?”
“You’ve got that right.” She shot him a glare before pushing her chair back and putting her bowl and spoon in the dishwasher and banana peel in the trash. Taking Flynn from his high chair, she left the kitchen.
Tag followed her up the stairs. “I was tired. I didn’t know what I was doing. You were hot, and I was horny and bam—magic happened.”
At the threshold to her room she whirled around and said, “Don’t waste your breath. An explanation like that makes you sound like a street thug from a seventies John Travolta movie. You knew exactly what you were doing, Tag. You’re a grown man. Accidents of this kind no longer happen.”
Banging the heel of his fist against her bedroom door, he gritted his teeth. “All right, truth? Yes, being with
you was freakin’ amazing. It was also wrong. I know how bad it hurts to lose someone you love, and I’m never putting myself through that again. The closer we get—physically and emotionally—the more danger I’m in. I can’t breathe, Liv. I have to have space.”
“I don’t mean to be cruel,” she said, obviously trying to keep her voice calm for Flynn’s benefit, “but just because Maria died, that hopefully doesn’t mean my time’s up tomorrow.”
“Of course not. You know what I’m talking about. And anyway, didn’t you tell me you wanted nothing to do with men? For God’s sake, you were so firm in your conviction to avoid any romantic entanglement that you had yourself artificially inseminated. A pretty drastic step, don’t you think?”
“News flash,” she said in a hushed tone right in his face, “but Phil destroyed me. I didn’t want to avoid men out of some perverse need to save memories, but to remind me that men are pigs and will only rip out my soul.” She kissed Flynn. “Except for you, sweetie.”
“So now I’m a pig because I don’t want to risk losing another woman I could grow to love? I wouldn’t survive it. Especially now that I’ve got Flynn to consider, I can’t risk an emotional meltdown. It wouldn’t be fair to him.”
After swallowing hard, she asked, “What about me, Tag? What’s fair to me? Your son’s mother.”
“The mother who told me she wants nothing to do with me.” He turned away from her, resting his forehead
against the wall. “That’s the only reason you’re here. Because you were safe. But then you turned out to be funny and you let your hair down and took my breath away when you smiled. What was I supposed to do with all of that? Last night was a mistake, Liv. I’m a man, and I fell in the face of temptation, but that’s it. I’m so sorry, but we must never be together in that way again.”
He glanced up to watch her green eyes well with tears.
She nodded, sniffling. “Of course. I understand. But you have to know that in the short time I’ve been with you, you’ve changed me. I’ve caught glimpses of what an awesome family you, me and Flynn could be—that is, if only you’d give us a chance.”
“That’s not fair,” he said, hating that he was the cause of her tears. “You knew exactly where I stood going into this thing. You can’t expect me to change midstream.”
Laughing, crying, she said, “That’s the stupid part. By your own admission, you already have changed. You’re just too thickheaded to see it.”
“I
WAS AFRAID OF THIS
,” Stephanie said over lunch at Mong’s on Tuesday, biting into a chicken egg roll. A soap opera was under way in the kitchen with much shouting and clattering of pots and pans. Every so often a waitress would come out and apologize for the noise.
Flynn was with his beloved Mrs. Nelson.
Relations between Olivia and Tag hadn’t been merely strained, but nonexistent.
Continuing after chewing, Steph said, “I knew you were going to fall for the guy, and then
bam
—he was going to break your heart.”
“You said no such thing,” Gabby complained over the Chinese guzheng string tunes being pumped through speakers. “I was the one telling you that any romance that comes about this fast is trouble.”
Adding more sugar to her iced tea, Olivia said, “You’re both delusional, as I clearly remember each of you being excited by the prospect of me maybe finding romance. The weird part is we never even had an official date. Just that one night in a hot tub when we’d both had a little too much wine and got carried away.”
“You can honestly say you had no romantic feelings for Tag before that night?”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” Olivia added lemon to her tea. Just thinking about all those times Tag had massaged her feet and calves raised heat in her cheeks.
“Ouch!” Steph complained, blotting a napkin to her eye. “Your lemon got me.”
“Sorry. Anyway,” Olivia continued, “I might’ve had some warm and fuzzies, but that’s it.”
“Uh-huh.” Gabby rolled her eyes. “That’s what I told myself about Dane, until one day we were making out half-naked in the hall.”