The Bakery Sisters (42 page)

“I've been in Seattle all my life.”

Walt leaned toward him. “There's nothing like it. We all look out for each other. It's like one big family. Personal relationships matter and you can't get that in a big city. Let me tell you a little bit about our football program.”

By the time dinner was over, Nicole found herself wanting to move more than halfway across the country to live in the beautiful campus housing. Walt made it all sound perfect.

His presentation was impressive. In addition to the usual brochures, he had a mini movie he played on a DVD player. He bought everyone the most expensive steak on the menu, kept them laughing with funny jokes and charmed with just enough sincerity to keep Nicole from getting suspicious.

She tuned out the talk on team building. The number of backs or halfbacks or whatever-backs wasn't her thing. What she did get was that this could be a very difficult decision.

When dinner was finished, Walt shook hands with them all and returned to the hotel. Hawk patted Raoul on the shoulder. “We'll talk about this more tomorrow. Why don't you wait in the restaurant so I can say good-night to my girl.”

Raoul smiled and stepped back inside.

“You two seemed to have made up,” Nicole said, figuring that was a safer topic than addressing the “my girl” part of the statement.

“We have an understanding,” Hawk told her, pulling her close to the building, then kissing her.

“Does this mean my curfew got extended?”

“Not exactly.”

That made her laugh. “He's still willing to take you on, huh?”

“Let's say I'm not pushing it. You're right. He's a good kid. I respect that.”

Nicole was suddenly fighting against a crushing tide of guilt. Brittany hadn't told Hawk about the baby. When she did, it would change everything, especially Hawk's relationship with his star player.

Should she tell him now? Give him some kind of warning? Was it her place? Her business?

She was torn. Not only had she promised Raoul and Brittany that she would keep the information quiet, Hawk had made it clear that he was the experienced parent while she was just a pretender. It had pissed her off at the time and it was kind of making her want to keep quiet now.

Was that bad? She was willing to accept immature, but bad was different.

Before she could decide, he said, “Thanks for coming tonight. Having a family member along keeps these things more low-key.”

“I'm not exactly a family member.”

“You're the closest he has.”

Which was really sad. “I care about him. He has to make a tough decision. It's going to change his life forever. Whatever he decides, he shouldn't have to do it alone.”

Hawk tucked her hair behind her ears, then touched her cheek. “You're amazing. You took him in, you're looking out for him. How many people would do that?”

She felt embarrassed. “It's not that big a deal. It just sort of happened.”

“To you. I meant what I said before.”

She had no idea what he was talking about. “When?”

“At your place. I'm done with the deal. I want us to date because we want to date. Not to prove anything. I want to be with you, Nicole.”

Her heart pounded so loudly, she wouldn't have been able to hear him if he'd kept talking. Hope and need and happiness bubbled up inside of her.

“I'd like that, too,” she said, hoping she didn't sound as eager as she felt.

He smiled, then kissed her. “So we're dating.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Exclusively.”

That made her laugh. “Yes, which means no dates for you with football moms.”

“Not a problem. You're the one that I want.”

Magic words, she thought with a sigh. Amazing words.

He kissed her again, his mouth pressing against hers as he claimed her with his tongue. She yielded to him, wanting more, needing him as much as she needed to breathe. Then a car drove by and she was aware of where they were and how late it was.

She pulled back. “I need to get Raoul home.”

“Brittany's waiting for me. But I'll see you soon.”

It sounded a whole lot more like a statement than a question, which she liked.

He stuck his head in the restaurant and motioned for Raoul. Together they walked to the valet, who quickly collected their cars. Hawk held her door open.

“I'll give you a call tomorrow.”

“I'd like that.”

She drove home, doing her best not to spontaneously giggle with delight.

 

N
ICOLE DUMPED
the spaghetti into the serving bowl and Raoul carried it over to the table.

“How many more recruiting dinners do you have lined up?” she asked as she opened the refrigerator and pulled out the salad.

“Three, including UCLA and Ohio.”

“Good schools. I don't know how you're going to decide.”

It was like teenage-boy heaven. All these colleges wanting to sign him. They had great organizations, offered an outstanding education and as many perks as the rules would allow. How was he supposed to figure out which one was the best?

“I'm making a chart,” Raoul told her as he poured himself a giant glass of milk. “Coach said that was a good place to start. Make a list of all the things that are important to me and rank the school that way. Like they do with cars in
Car and Driver.
”

“My favorite magazine,” she teased.

“I'll show it to you.”

“Promises like that shouldn't be made lightly.”

He grinned. “I want to be at a school where they're going to play me. Time on the field is everything.”

Because it was hard to impress anyone from the bench. “Got that. But you also need a team with depth.”

He raised his eyebrows.

“I've been doing some reading,” she admitted. “I can see we're going to be on this topic for a while, so I want to be informed.”

“Impressive.”

“I know.”

“Brittany's making a chart, too. What she likes about the schools and doesn't like.”

Nicole's good mood popped like a punctured balloon. Brittany's input shouldn't matter, but there was no point in saying that. Raoul wouldn't listen.

“When are you going to tell Hawk?” she asked. “He needs to know. I was okay keeping your secret before, but it's starting to bother me.”

The need for him to know had gotten worse after he'd talked to her about dating for real. Now she felt as if she were keeping secrets from someone she was supposed to be loyal to.

“Soon.”

“According to Brittany, this is all total happiness, so why wait?”

Raoul looked at her. “I know you don't agree with what we're doing, but our minds are made up. Brittany and I are going to have a baby. That means we'll be together.”

“I know. You keep telling me.”

“But you're mad.”

“I'm not mad. I'm disappointed. Raoul, you're both so young. I know it seems like everything is going to be fine, but what if it isn't? You don't have a backup plan.”

“I love her, Nicole. Love doesn't come with backup plans or guarantees. You have to take it on faith. I want to be with her. I want to see her smile every day. I want to hear her voice and have her tell me what I've done to make her happy. I want to go to sleep, feeling her heart beating against mine. I want her to be the mother of my children. I want to experience everything in life, with her, because being with her is the best part of my day.”

It was an amazing speech, Nicole thought, stunned both by the words and the emotion behind them. At that moment Raoul wasn't a teenager or some kid who needed a place to stay. He was a man in love with a woman.

“Okay,” she said quietly. “I get it. I'll stop pushing.”

Probably because what he'd said had made her realize something about herself. She, too, was in love with someone amazing. A caring, sexy man who made her heart beat faster every time he was around. A smart, funny guy who made her want to believe in possibilities and hope and love. A man who might still be in love with his late wife, whose daughter was pregnant and from whom she'd been keeping a really big secret.

Lucky, lucky her.

H
AWK SCROLLED
through the Web site. He wanted to plan a weekend away with Nicole after football season ended.

Somewhere nice, he thought, checking out different hotels. But he didn't want to spend the whole time driving. He had other things on his mind. Maybe Portland. It was only three hours away and there were plenty of good restaurants. Or they could head down to the Oregon wine country and do some tasting.

In the other direction, there was Bellingham, close to the Canadian border. He'd heard one of the teachers talking about a small hotel with a spa. Now he wasn't into the whole mud wrap, massage thing, but Nicole might be and he wanted to make her happy.

San Francisco was only a couple of hours away by plane. Still, there was wait time at the airport, time he could spend with Nicole in bed.

“Daddy, can I talk to you?”

“Hmmm? Sure.” Hawk motioned his daughter into his study but didn't turn his attention away from the computer.

Should he ask Nicole first or surprise her? He wanted the trip to be a surprise, but women didn't always take that sort of thing really well. She might need to make special arrangements. Raoul could take care of himself and the dog, but what about Nicole's business? Yeah, he would have to tell her.

What if he could find a place with a private hot tub? Now that was some quality time he could get behind.

“Daddy, are you listening?”

“What? Sure, honey. Go on.”

He forced his attention away from the computer and looked at his daughter. Brittany stood in the doorway to his office.

“Like I was saying, I've been thinking a lot about Mom and what you two went through.”

What? When? “Uh-huh.”

“You had a very special relationship,” Brittany continued.

He still had no idea what this was all about. “We both loved you a lot. You know that, right?”

“Sure. I've always felt special, Daddy. Like I'm a part of something really important.”

“Good.” His attention strayed back to the screen.

“That's why I'm excited about following in your footsteps.”

Footsteps? He clicked on a link.

“You know. With the baby and all.”

Baby?

Hawk's gaze narrowed down to a single point of light. He heard a rushing sound, followed by the thundering of his heart. It was as if he suddenly weighed ten thousand pounds. He could barely move his head. He managed to turn so he could see his daughter.

“Baby?”

She paused, then licked her lips. “Uh-huh.” Her smile trembled at the corners. “Are you excited? I'm excited, Daddy, and Raoul is, too. Now let me explain. We're going to be fine. We have it all worked out. We'll do what you and Mom did. Raoul will get a full scholarship to college and I'll move there, too. It'll be great. I'm excited about being a mom. A little scared, but excited. Raoul's really happy. And he's going to pick a good school. One I'll like, too.”

Hawk heard the words, at least he thought he did. But none of them made sense. Was it a language thing? Had she suddenly started speaking Polish or something?

“You're pregnant?” he demanded, slowly rising to his feet, feeling the heat of anger matched only by his sense of betrayal.

She took a step back. “Daddy, don't be mad. It's no big deal.”

Nothing made sense. How could this be happening? “No big deal? You said you weren't having sex with Raoul.”

She flushed and stared at the floor. “Yes, well, we were. Sort of.”

“Sort of? Not if you're pregnant. If you're having a baby, you weren't going halfway. Goddammit all to hell, Brittany, how could you do this?”

She looked at him, her eyes filling with tears. “Daddy, don't yell at me.”

“What else am I supposed to do? Congratulate you? You're only seventeen. You're still in high school. You're supposed to be smarter than this. You lied to me—you've been running around behind my back.”

“Like you told your parents when you were having sex with Mom?”

He wasn't going there. “This is about you. I can't believe it. Even if you were willing to be that dumb, I can't believe Raoul went along with it.”

“Why wouldn't he? We love each other. We're getting married.”

“The hell you are. You're seventeen. You're not doing anything but going to your room.”

“What? You can't send me to my room.”

“Watch me. You're going there right now and you're going to stay there.”

She started to cry. “Daddy, no. Why don't you understand? This is what we want.”

“You're too young to know what you want and apparently you're too young to have any judgment. I expected better of you, Brittany.”

“That's how I feel about you. You're being horrible.”

Too little, too late, he thought, knowing he wasn't feeling it all now, knowing it was going to get worse. Pregnant? This was a disaster. What about her future? What about college? A kid would screw up everything. How had this happened?

He shook his head. He knew all too well how it had happened. He'd been there, done that, bought the T-shirt. Or bag of diapers.

“I'm going to kill him,” he muttered.

Brittany grabbed his arm. “Daddy, no. I want to marry Raoul.”

“No way. Just so we're clear. You are going to your room and you're going to stay there. You are not to see Raoul or talk to him or text with him. You'll have no contact. The only time you'll leave this house is when I drive you to and from school. You won't see your friends, nothing.”

She glared at him. “Locking me up isn't going to make me any less pregnant. I hate you.”

“You're not my favorite person right now, either.”

“Nicole wasn't anything like this,” she yelled as she stomped toward the stairs. “She didn't scream or anything.”

Everything went cold and dark. Hawk fought to not put his fist through a wall.

“Nicole knows?”

Brittany ignored him and ran up the stairs. He followed her and caught her just as she entered her bedroom. He grabbed the door before she could slam it.

“Nicole knows?” he asked again.

Brittany stared at him with all the loathing a seventeen-year-old could generate. “Yes, she knows.”

“For how long?”

“About a week.”

He released the door and his daughter slammed it.

A week? Nicole had known and not said anything? She'd gone to that dinner, had listened to him say he wanted to date her and all the damn time she'd known his daughter was pregnant and hadn't said a word?

 

T
HE NIGHT WAS COOL
and clear. Nicole sat out on the front steps, staring at the stars in the sky. She was feeling restless and emotionally on edge and knew the cause. Jesse.

She missed her sister. Jesse might lie, steal the family cake recipe and sleep with Nicole's husband, but she was still her sister.

Raoul stepped out onto the porch. “You okay?” he asked. “You've been out here a long time.”

She smiled at him. “I'm the grown-up. I'm supposed to worry about you.”

“You've been quiet a lot lately.”

“I've been thinking about Jesse.”

Raoul knew the basics of what had happened. “Still no word?”

“None. She's not going to get in touch with me. Why would she? I made it really clear I wanted her gone.”

“But you didn't?”

“I don't know what I wanted. I guess I wanted her to be different.” Like that was going to happen.

“You could go after her,” he said.

“I've thought about that. I can't decide. Should I let her grow up on her own? Is it better to let her see what life is really about? Then I remember she's my baby sister and she's pregnant and maybe this is all too much.” There was a child to think of. Nicole's niece or nephew. There was a connection. She just didn't know where her responsibilities started and stopped or how much more pain her heart could handle.

“Sometimes people have to find their own bottom,” he said.

She shook her head. “Don't you dare get all twelve-step on me.”

“I won't.”

He moved to the other end of the step and sat down. Sheila followed him, her movements slow. At her last checkup the vet had said it was just a matter of days until she had her puppies. Nicole already had plenty of towels and newspaper on hand.

“I won't know if I'm doing the right thing until it's too late. And if letting her go is the wrong decision, how do I fix it?”

“Why is she your responsibility?” he asked.

“Because she always has been. Even when I resented everything about her, I took care of her. I raised her. I wish I'd done a better job.”

“You were a kid yourself.”

“Still, I'm the reason she is how she is.”

“Not necessarily. Maybe she was just born that way.”

“That would be nice,” Nicole said, resting her forearms on her knees. “Then it wouldn't be my fault.”

“It's not now.”

“It feels like it is.” She looked at him. “Sometimes you're very wise.”

“Growing up on the street does that.”

“Then be smart about Brittany and the baby.”

“Get off me about that.”

“I'm not sure I can. I know you love her, but jeez, Raoul. Get a clue.”

Sheila lay down, then got up and walked over to Nicole.

“What's the matter, baby?” she asked, stroking the dog's heaving sides. “Is it close to your time?”

Sheila didn't answer. Raoul's eyes widened. “Is she going to have her puppies?”

“I don't know. The vet said—”

A truck screamed around the corner and slammed to a stop in front of her house. Hawk jumped out of the vehicle and stalked toward the house.

She could tell by the way he moved that he was more than angry.

“Get inside,” Nicole told Raoul as she scrambled to her feet.

“What?”

“Get inside now. I'll deal with this.”

“I'm not afraid of him.”

“Then you're an idiot. You have a future that depends on you still being alive. Get in the house.”

But it was too late. Hawk took the stairs two at a time, grabbed Raoul by the front of his shirt and pulled him to his feet.

“What the fuck were you thinking, sleeping with my daughter? I'm going to kill you. You got that? When I'm done there will be nothing left. The biggest piece of you won't even fill an envelope.”

He vibrated with fury.

Nicole pushed between them, but Hawk wouldn't let go of Raoul's shirt.

“Stop it,” she yelled. “Just stop it. Hawk, take a step back, now. I mean it.”

Sheila whined and moved closer to Nicole. Hawk ignored them both.

“This is between me and him. Back off, Nicole. You and I will talk about what you did later.”

“Let's talk about it now,” she said, knowing she needed to distract Hawk before he did something they would all regret. “I knew. That's what you mean, right? I knew Brittany was pregnant and I didn't tell you.”

He released Raoul and turned on her. At least she knew she wasn't in any physical danger. She willed Raoul to run, but the kid was too honorable. He just stood there.

Hawk's eyes blazed with fury. “How could you not tell me? She's my daughter. I had the right to know.”

“Believe me, I'm not happy about any of this, but I found out she was pregnant and they asked me not to say anything. I agreed to keep quiet until Brittany could tell you herself.”

“Where do you get off doing that?”

She understood that he was angry and that none of this seemed fair, but she felt a little temper of her own stirring.

“You're the all-knowing parent,” she told him. “You're the one with the special bond with your daughter. I told you they were probably sleeping together, but did you listen? Was it possible I was right? Of course not. Because I don't have children of my own, I'm not privy to the secret and special code.”

His gaze narrowed. “This is a hell of a time to throw that in my face.”

“You can't have it both ways. Either I'm one of you or I'm not. Besides, why are you so upset? Brittany is only trying to relive your perfect life. You've told her and told her that this is exactly how things were for you and Serena. You've practically carved it in a gold tablet. I said it might not be a good idea to paint the past so damned perfect, but once again, I was wrong. You knew it all. So here's the result. She's pregnant and now there's a really big problem.”