The Becoming Trilogy Box Set (Books 1-3) (99 page)

Ash lifted her bare feet up
onto the edge of the chair as jaws gnashed after the scraps her grandmother was
throwing. She could have sworn the other woman was purposely tossing them
closer. ‘Why do you want the
Skil
?’ she asked.

‘I require it to close the
conduits to Fomor, permanently.’

A hysterical laugh choked up
Ash’s throat. 'You want me to help you kill all of the wolves in exchange for
Liath's life?'

The Morrígan inclined her
head regally. 'Not only hers. Yours too, your sister's, and that of every girl
destined to become their victims if they are allowed to go on living.’

‘What about the bargain you
already made with Connal?’ She felt like she was making a pact with the devil,
and she could almost smell the loophole she was missing. ‘You promised to let
us live if he killed MacTire.’

‘I did, and my offer stands,
but I’ve known Connal Savage a lot longer than you have, my child, and we both
know he doesn’t have the spunk to kill his brother, even to save your life. All
men disappoint you in the end. Better to accept it now, rather than after they
have used up the best of you and moved on. We women are the strength of a race,
we are the ones who will stop at nothing to protect what is ours.’

Shaking her head, Ash looked
up from a pair of girls on the floor, literally killing one another over a
piece of gristle. Her grandmother might have a point, perhaps females were
deadlier, but there was also honour among men. Her grandmother saw Connal’s
reluctance to kill Mac as a weakness, but it only made Ash love him harder. He
could never disappoint her. ‘Why did you make the bargain, if you knew he
wouldn't go through with it?’ she asked.

‘Because it amuses me to see
him suffer, and I needed him to keep you alive long enough for you to come to
me. I’ve been expecting you. Yours is the true bargain I seek.’

Oh, yeah. This smells
rotten. Definitely a deal with the devil. She’ll be asking for your soul over
dessert, no doubt.

Ash tugged on the bait.

‘To reclaim your immortality,
every wolf has to die, correct? Then what about me?’ Ash asked the question
that had been lining her gut with dread for some time now. There was no way the
Morrígan was going to spill her plans and let her walk away from here. There
had to be a catch. ‘Are you going to kill me too? I’m wolf.’

The goddess sat back in her
chair. ‘You are not incorrect. You too must die, and your lover with you. Your
sister also, unfortunately. But there is another way.’

‘What can you possibly offer
me, when you’ve just admitted you want us all dead?’

‘You know that with god’s
blood, the blade has the power to sever bonds?’

Ash nodded slowly.

‘This is my bargain to you.
Bring me the
Skil
and I will use it to separate your human soul from the
beast within, permanently. I will do the same for your precious Connal, and I
will even free your
thrall
friend. I offer you the chance to return to
your human life, with your lover, to live out your lifespan, however long that
might be.’

'What would become of my
wolf?'

'The creature will die when
the moon wanes, if not before. You were born with only one soul. Apart, you
cannot both survive. If you'd prefer something more humane, I can have my girls
take care of her.'

Neither option sounded particularly
painless.

‘What about all of the
thegn
?’
Ash asked. ‘They have wolf-blood too, don’t they? But they’re immune to your
curse. They won’t die if you close the conduits.’

‘The
thegn
are immune
precisely because their blood is so weak. I could let them live and their
combined toll on my immortality would hardly amount to a wrinkle on my arse.’

The tone of her voice made
Ash wary. ‘You’re not planning to let them live though, are you?’

The Morrígan shrugged. ‘With
the wolves dead, they will fight amongst themselves for leadership. It is their
nature. I might amuse myself with their wars, savour their self-destruction for
as long as they hold my interest.’

Ash straightened in her
chair, chewing over her grandmother’s words. Cruelty laced every syllable, and
it made her skin itch with panic. Feeling like a fish cutting itself up in a
net, she stared at the plate in front of her and grasped for calm.

‘Why should I trust you? Why
are you offering me this?’
Why can’t I see another solution?

Snake-like and sensuous, the
goddess moved in a glide of sweeping, translucent fabric to circle around to
the back of Ash’s chair, breath hot on the back of her neck. ‘Part of you, at
least, is my own flesh and blood. Cold fingers left a trail of ice on
breath-heated skin as the Morrígan tenderly smoothed a tendril of Ash’s hair
back into the comb’s teeth. ‘I am not wholly without maternal instinct. Why
else would I have saved you from the wolves that tore your mother apart? You
and your sister have great potential. Provided we can exorcise the monster that
possesses each of you, you too have god-blood in your veins. There is so much I
can teach you. Think about it. We are family. Together, as three, we could be
invincible.’ The word blew a hot kiss to her ear. ‘I’m giving you that choice.’

Like the choice you gave
those girls?
Ash snorted softly.
‘What if I refuse?’

‘Then you choose to die with
the monsters who imprisoned you, and tried to rape and exterminate you. That,
my Dear, is up to you.’ The Morrígan spun her around, chair and all, moving so
far into her space that the wolf inside her tried to rise up in defence. It
strained against the hold she had on it, and her joints popped under the
pressure of controlling it. Her grandmother’s beautiful face twisted up with
vicious conviction. ‘I will have the
Skil
, with or without your help.
One way or the other, the Fomorian race is marked for death.’

‘If you can free me,’ Ash
asked, ‘why not them too? Why not sever all of their bonds and let them live as
men?’

‘Elatha made me bleed for him
once. Never again. Do you hear me? Never.’

Refusing to back down, Ash
straightened her spine. ‘What about Connal? He’s one of them too. How do I know
you’ll really let him live?’ Every instinct Ash had was screaming at her not to
trust her promises.

‘Connal Savage has serviced
me well over the years,’ the Morrígan said lightly.

‘You mean served you well?’
The wolf leaked into her voice in a low rumble, a warning masquerading as an
emphasis.

‘If you say so.’

Ash’s vision slashed to red
at her grandmother’s non-answer. It was too evasive and it was nauseating. Her
thoughts ran wild, agonising over something that was probably all in her head.

‘With his wolf dead, Connal
will live and die as a human, unlike you, my dear. I shall tolerate his presence
until then, if only to allow you overcome this foolish infatuation you have
with the boy. You may even grow bored of him as he grows old and grey, though
knowing him, he’ll drink himself into an early grave.’

The goddess didn’t appreciate
her contemplative silence. Fingers snapped in front of Ash’s eyes and she
focussed on her ancestor’s glare. ‘I have set my terms. Do you choose to
bargain with the Morrígan?’

‘This is all too much to take
in. I need time to think it over,’ Ash countered.

'Take your time. You have
until the full moon to decide, but I'm going to have to detain you here until
then. I'm sure you understand. Do make yourself at home in Morrígan, and eat
something. Please.’ Her sunny smile hid razor blades.

‘I’ll eat in my room, if you
don’t mind, Grandmother. So I can think.’
Without you staring at me.
Ash
picked up her plate at the regal nod and walked at a dead run through the arch
to her temporary room.

It was four in the morning
when Madden heard the rattle of the doorknob and turned, syringe in hand, from
Liath’s bedside. The man who walked through the door was a pale wraith of his
former self. Dark shadows haunted eyes framed by a fall of unkempt hair that
had grown out considerably in the weeks since Ash had left. His muscular
forearms were criss-crossed with lacerations in various stages of healing, and
his unshaven jaw had the set of a man braced for tragedy.

‘Any luck?’ Madden asked
quietly.

Connal’s abbreviated head
shake was grim.

Every night the poor bastard
set out in search of her, and every night he returned with his hands hanging.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said, though it seemed nowhere near enough.

‘It’s been three weeks,’
Connal said hoarsely. He cleared his throat, but the crack in his voice
remained. ‘There’s nowhere left to go, Doc. I’ve tried every known Neolithic
site in Ireland, even some undiscovered ones. Monoliths, tombs, dolmens,
fairy-forts. No standing stone left unturned. I could give Lara Croft a run for
her money.’ There was no humour in the laugh that escaped his throat, only
mockery. ‘Look at me,’ he said, pronating his arms to reveal the true extent of
his self-mutilation. ‘I’ve cut myself so many times you could play noughts and
crosses on my skin.’ Falling to his sides, his hands curled into fists. ‘I’ve
chanted those fucking words until my vocal cords bled. And nothing. It’s as
though she’s disappeared off the face of the earth.’

‘You could try the Master
again?’ Madden offered.

Connal’s head shook with
resignation. ‘The answer will still be the same.’

‘What will you do? It’s
almost full-moon.’

Connal paced out the floor of
the bedroom and braced his arms at the window. Bathed in moonlight he stared up
at the night sky and exhaled, long and slow. ‘I’ll stick with the plan,’ he
said. ‘MacTire wants to put on a show? I’ll give him one. The Gods know I’m
gunning for a fight.’

He might want it, Madden
thought. He might have a world of frustration to vent, but the guy hardly
looked fit for a haircut. ‘Are you sure that’s wise?’ he asked.

‘I’m dying anyway,’ he said,
resting his forehead to the misted glass.

Madden sucked in a breath.
‘Not if you kill him,’ he said carefully. ‘That was the Morrígan’s bargain,
wasn’t it? His life in exchange for yours and Ash’s?’

‘What a shitty, dishonourable
life that would be, knowing I’d committed murder, that someone else had to die
in my stead?’

‘It’s not murder if it’s
self-defence,’ Madden suggested.

‘Premeditated self-defence?’
Connal threw back at him, incredulous. ‘Right. Whatever helps you sleep, Doc.’

Madden’s shoulders slumped in
defeat. ‘What about Ash? I know you’d kill for her.’
Assuming she isn’t
already dead,
Madden thought, but for now, he was buying into Connal’s
denial game.

‘She wouldn’t want MacTire
dead, any more than I do. Whatever happened down in Fomor, those two have
history. She tried to deny it, but in her own way, she cares for him.’

‘She might care for him,’
Madden sighed, ‘but she loves you. There’s a world of difference.’

‘Yeah,’ Connal agreed, ‘and I
love her too much to let her die with me. In exchange for this fight, I’ve had
MacTire agree to take her back to Fomor when the moon wanes.’

Madden shot him a look that
failed to disguise his shock. ‘Shit,’ he said, the word falling from parted
lips.

‘Against her will, if
necessary,’ Connal added. ‘I refuse to believe we’ve come this far for nothing,
Doc. The Master said I’d see her again. Maybe he meant in the afterlife, but if
there’s the smallest chance she’s still alive, then I’m sure as hell coming
good on my side of the deal. I’m going to win the
Skil.
Maybe you can
still find a way to use it, after I’m gone. You have to help
her
,’ he
said, indicating Liath with a tip of his jaw, ‘for the sake of the kid, if
nothing else. She got into this mess helping me out. I owe her.’

‘She felt the same way about
you,’ Madden said quietly, brushing a stray lock of hair from Liath’s fevered
cheek. Her eyes flickered beneath her lids in response to his gentle touch. She
had grown so gaunt on her diet of
eitr
, her skin wrapped tight to the
fine bone-structure of her face, her collarbones jutting out over the white
sheet. ‘You were a good friend to her, Connal. You saved them both from that
abusive prick. She never forgot that.’ Desperation lined Madden’s face as he
stared at the woman he’d loved secretly, and for so long. She’d loved him too,
briefly, until he stole her memories and left them both with nothing but empty
holes where that love had been. She believed her little boy was the product of
a drunken one-night stand, when the reality had been so very different. Too
good to be true, as it turned out. Once Doyle pulled back the covers on
Madden’s secret, double life, he’d had no choice but to back away, or see their
son taken and killed, or worse. ‘I only ever wanted to keep them safe from this
unforgiving world,’ he said quietly. Instead he’d wound up dragging her down
into the mire with him. What he wouldn’t give now to see just a glimmer of
recognition in her eyes. Would he ever get the chance to explain? Maybe, if
Connal got him the blade, he could exchange it with the Master for Liath’s
life. The weapon was clearly valuable to the ancients. Hope was a glowing ember
in his chest that he dared not fan, for fear of it going up in smoke.