The Beginning Of Rain In December (2 page)

“What do you enjoy?” He asked.

“Anything Italian. You can order for me, if you wish,” she said, observing as a waiter joined their table in an impeccable starched white shirt, long white apron and crisp pants.

“Of course,” he replied smoothly, his deep voice causing shivers to rake across her skin, her bare arms. She was dressed in a little black shelf bra dress that hugged the curves upon her body. It had been a splurge gift with Belle begging her to buy the sexy dress. It was altogether too cold in Seattle to wear, especially in December with the temperatures at the freezing mark, yet, Rain splurged and hoping she wouldn’t freeze.

He gave the waiter there orders, appetizers, three entrees that they could try, and an expensive red wine. When the waiter left, Enlai returned his emerald green eyes towards her, smiling. “You have a very beautiful name…Rain, though somewhat melancholy. Why did your parents decide to name you such?” He asked.

Rain smiled even though the thoughts of her parents were repulsive to say the least. “I was adopted at a young age so I am not quite sure why they decided to give me this name.” She admitted politely. There was always a careful, blank persona to Rain when meeting someone for the first time. When learning about another person and when that other person asked intimate details of her life. Details that most normal people could and willingly answered, but not for Rain because the first eighteen years of her life had been the equivalent of hell on earth.

“I understand,” he said, not stating he was sorry or looking at her with sympathy as so many others had responded upon finding out her adoption status.

She found his reply simple and refreshing and felt one small brick of her security and privacy removed. Just one. “I wish I knew more but I have accepted that I don’t.”

“You immigrated here?”

“I don’t know. And you? Do I hear a British accent?”

It was his turn to nod. “Yes, but I left the country years ago.”

“Do you visit often?” She asked and paused as their waiter brought their wine and another waiter brought their crisp endive salad and perfect rustic and homemade Italian bread. “To see family?” She started once the waiters had left after serving their beginning course and wine.

“Yes, but not nearly enough, work keeps me busy,” he said, before lifting his wine glass in his large, hard hands. “A toast,” he said and watched as she raised her own wine glass in petite hands, her fingers elegant. “To blind dates,” he said a rueful smile on his perfectly formed lips.

“To blind dates,” she said.

Rain woke with a groan…or more than a groan, more like a moan. She blinked, trying to remember the events of the night before, the gorgeous Enlai who had been the perfect gentleman. Turning, she paused, knowing she was in a bed but not remembering just exactly how she had gotten to bed and why she was dressed in a man’s white t-shirt that reached her mid-thigh.

Only as she blinked back the fuzziness from her eyes and glanced around did she realize that she was not in her bed, but someone else’s bed and there was a quite large, quite masculine, quite beautiful nude male body lying next to her.

She knew who that body was, the tantalizing Enlai, she’d found out he was half British and half Chinese, his father a British diplomat, his mother a prostitute. He’d been fostered off to his father after his mothers’ death at the age of six and had lived with his fathers’ new family, a young white, English wife who hated him and a baby sister that he adored. A father that was remote, removed and perfectly British. And she, for some strange reason she wanted to tell them the remembered details of her life, but had refrained, never feeling such an immediate connection to someone so soon. They had left the restaurant, went to view the stars at the University of Washington’s astronomy department, then he’d taken her for a private, closed door tour of the Seattle Aquarium and then they had visited a bar in downtown Seattle and she remembered having more wine and a little bit more and a little bit more.

And then her memory stopped.

She didn’t want to move, no matter, how horrible she felt at the position she now found herself in and no matter that this was the first man she had ever willingly laid with. The first male contact she had in twelve years. She was sure he had laughed at her inexperience, but couldn’t remember him doing such. She knew however, that men usually kicked the woman out after sex and she didn’t want to be embarrassed by him politely asking her to leave and she turned, as quiet as a mouse, trying to ease out of the large king size bed.

“We didn’t have sex,” his voice interrupted her, even deeper due to sleep, a smile in his words.

Rain blushed again, stilling instantly, her cheeks on fire as she tried valiantly to think of something to say, but in this, dealing with men, lovers, intimate details of the bedroom she was a novice, scared, frightened…usually. Obviously the wine had quieted all of her inhibitions and fears last night.

“Oh,” she finally said, too embarrassed to meet his eyes and instead sat up with her back towards him, fingering the bottom of the hem of his shirt. Nervous and with butterflies in her stomach. “I don’t much remember last night, after we went to the bar downtown. I could say that I never drink and I never have sex and I am sure that you would highly doubt both but I don’t and I don’t know what else to say.”

He was quiet for long moments until finally she turned, meeting his sleepy eyes, a smile upon his face. “I believe you,” he finally said. “You, I think you are a virgin, or you hadn’t made love to anyone for a very long time. You were quite nervous last night. It wasn’t right to try anything with you especially because you had a little too much to drink.”

“Oh, did I make a fool of myself?” She asked quietly and in embarrassment.

“No you didn’t. You were very talkative, however, but it mostly centered on Mark’s and Belle’s children.”

She dropped her head in embarrassment and heard him chuckle.

“Don’t be shy,” he said, sitting up in bed and pulling her towards him, as she politely averted her eyes, the sheet dropping low onto his lap. “You were beautiful and funny and your wall came crumbling down. I had fun. We watched a movie in bed and I gave you my shirt to wear to sleep. You said I could go to sleep in the nude but you put a barrier of pillows between the two of us. I have never been so politely rejected.”

“I’m such an idiot,” she said, finding herself smiling nonetheless, glad that she hadn’t had sex with a near stranger on a first date, but also, there was an ache within her that wanted him to fill it, wanted to know his touch.

“Far from it,” he said, his voice deeper, smiling at her as she became mesmerized by his beautiful eyes.

She didn’t know if it was she who leaned closer to him or if it was him who pulled her closer to him only that their lips were touching, hers hesitant in curiosity and a burgeoning need, his in perfect masculinity but careful, as if with a doe, not wanting to frighten her away, she was so skittish. Afraid to live, afraid of anything except security and privacy.

The kiss deepened, touching each other, low moans escaping from their mouths. He pulled her to the bed gently, not breaking their kiss and her arms slowly and hesitantly wrapped around his masculine neck, the feel of his kiss upon her was unbearable, filling her up with passion, a passion that she knew was alright to feel, but still did not stop her thoughts from crashing in upon her, the realization that she was kissing a man, she’d never kissed anyone, that she was allowing someone to see her vulnerability.

Her breath started quickening, she didn’t want to appear foolish but she had to get up, away from him, away from this.

She started shaking her head, her hands dropping and he instantly stopped, pulling away, tuned to her needs. “What is wrong?” He asked gently, his breath rough, his manhood already hard.

“I, we shouldn’t. I don’t want to appear to be a tease but this isn’t…I don’t feel right.” She said and expected his anger, lashing out at her.

“Okay,” he replied.

She stared at him in distrust, it couldn’t be that easy. She started scooting from the bed, watching him, waiting for him to move, hurt her, attack her, but he didn’t move, simply staring at her.

“I will never hurt you,” he replied.

She didn’t agree or disagree. Simply stood on the opposite side of the bed and met his eyes. “I think I should go home, now,” she said. “Where is my dress?”

“On the chair behind you.” He returned.

Nodding, she picked up her shoes, her dress, coat and purse, hearing her keys rattle within the black clutch bag. “And the bathroom?”

“You can use my bathroom, through the door behind the chair or the guest bathroom, down the hall and to the right,” he said, once again still, as if he was with a frightened deer, not moving, not wanting to scare her away.

“The guest bathroom,” she finally said and made her way through his bedroom that was large, impeccably done in masculine woods and simple furnishings, the large window open and she noticed for the first time they were in a sky rise apartment downtown, his condo overlooking the beauty of the city and the harbor.

She walked briskly towards the bathroom, found it, and hurriedly put her clothes on, wrapping her coat around herself and taking out her pepper spray, placing it in the pocket of her coat. So far he hadn’t attacked her, she didn’t feel violated, and he had been calm considering her skittish behavior.

She opened the door carefully, calling him, not wanting to go back to his bedroom, and placing the shirt he had given her last night neatly folded upon his dark leather couch in his living room, staring at the view of the city as she heard his footsteps walking towards her.

“Are you ready?” He asked, dressed in black slacks and a black shirt, looking as handsome as he had last night.

“I will call a cab to pick me up,” she said, going towards the door.

“Rain,” he began. It was a command, her heart stopped in her throat. “I will not hurt you.” He repeated again. “I will drive you to your car.”

Shaking her head, she reached the door, unlocking and opening it. “No, that won’t be necessary. Thank you for last night. Good bye.” And with those words she escaped.

She walked downtown when she left his apartment, it was early Sunday morning, and the city seemed strangely vacant, empty. Finding a Starbucks close by she ordered a green tea and sat at the bar overlooking the deserted street with a few other people before pulling out her cellphone to call a taxi service. She felt as strangely empty as the street before her, the quiet of the Starbucks, her thoughts empty of the past twelve hours, not wanting to remember. Not about his beauty, his gentleness how he had reacted to her behavior. She wanted to forget the embarrassment, her lack of sophistication even though she was nearly thirty one, her loneliness, her past that would not die although she wished more than anything it would.

When the taxi arrived she hurriedly escaped into the warm confines and gave the taxi driver the address of the restaurant where her car was.

The ride was long, the taxi driver had on soft classical music lulling her into some sort of peace.

“Thank you,” she said when the taxi driver parked behind her car. She pulled out the cash and a tip to pay him and walked towards her car warming it up as she sat shivering in the cold, turning on some music and feeling an overwhelming since to cry. “You are stupid and childish, Rain. You have to get over your past, or else they will win.”

She drove home, took a shower, brushed her teeth and escaped to her bed where the very image of Enlai refused to leave her mind’s eye.

“So how was the date?” Belle asked as they met each other for tea first thing in the morning before they began work at the museum where she was a director of East African studies and Belle was director of children’s studies.

She stirred her tea in the small, family owned coffee shop where they always met, it being the complete opposite of Starbucks, where the barista’s knew your name and order within two visits and the employees treated the customers like family. She found it strange that she did not want to tell Belle the details of the date and especially how childish and skittish she had been around Enlai.

“It was nice,” she finally admitted. “He is very…different.”

“Different in a good way or bad way?” Belle asked interestedly.

“Just different. I’ve never met anyone like him before. He was very patient, intelligent, kind…but hard, masculine. He, he definitely was not a metrosexual; he radiated masculinity, rawness, a tough exterior. I don’t know, like I said he is very different.”

“Did you all set up another date?” Belle asked excitedly because Rain never spoke about any of the past dates in such in depth terms. Had never seemed remotely interested in any of the men Belle had set her up with.

Rain shrugged, Enlai had called but she had not answered. He’d also left her a voicemail asking her if she wanted to do just that, meet for dinner next week. She had not returned his call. She couldn’t. “No, I think it would be for the best if we don’t meet again.”

Belle screeched before staring at her best friend. “Now listen here, Ms. Rain, you shall not chicken out, this man is perfect for you, I knew it the minute I saw him. Stop being a big chicken and take life by the balls for once and live!” She told her emphatically. “Stop letting your past dictate your future, if you do you let them win.”