The Billionaire's Best Friend (The Sherbrookes of Newport) (22 page)

“
We need to do something about these two.” With his free hand he pushed JoJo’s paws off of him and placed the bakery box on the counter.

“
They only do that to you,” Lauren said, tossing her words over her shoulder as she continued to search for something.

“
Lucky me,” he muttered, moving up behind her and turning her around to face him. When she opened her mouth to answer, he moved in and silenced her with a kiss. His tongue slowly traced her bottom lip before slipping inside. Without any hesitation she wrapped her arms around him and pressed her body against his, her tongue mating with his as her fingernails dug into his short hair. The cool air from the open refrigerator was a stark contrast to the burning heat raging in his body. Somehow he managed to keep his grip on the flowers and pick her up at the same time. When she wrapped her legs around his waist, he groaned as the pressure behind his zipper increased.

After one final kiss, he pulled his mouth from hers. They needed to talk first before they did anything else.
“We’ll get back to this after dinner. I promise.”

Lauren
’s eyes fluttered open. “You want to wait? Really?”

He looked away, counted to ten in his head, and nodded.

She unwrapped her legs from his waist and slid down his body. “Who are you?” she asked, eyeing first him and then the flowers. “And since when do you buy me flowers?”

On second thought, maybe he should have skipped the flowers, or had he imagined the suspicion in her voice?
“Don’t get used to it.” Through pure willpower, he forced a smile.

She accepted the bouquet.
“I won’t,” she said and kissed him on the cheek. “Since you want to eat
now
, go on outside, and I’ll be right out.”

That night they enjoyed dinner on the deck. Earlier in the week Lauren had strung lights around the deck railing and the lights, along with the candles on the table, gave the tiny backyard deck a romantic glow. Despite the setting, beautiful companion, and delicious food, Nate went through the entire meal on autopilot. He cut and chewed his food but didn
’t taste it. He nodded and agreed as necessary to Lauren’s conversation but didn’t hear it. His thoughts remained locked on the conversation they still needed to have. The one he didn’t know how to start.

“
I picked out bridesmaid dresses today.” Lauren changed the subject to the wedding for the first time all night. “I went with the lilac. I wanted the yellow, but it didn’t look good on everyone.”

The shit
’s about to hit the fan
. Nate took a swig of his beer. “We need to change the date of the wedding, Lauren.” Sugarcoating the truth would do no good.

Lauren laughed and broke her cupcake in half.
“Real funny.”

He hadn
’t expected her not to believe him. “Lauren, I’m not joking.” He reached across the table and took her hand. “We need to push it up. I need to be in Quantico on the 15th.”

“
Can’t it wait till after the wedding? What are you going down there for anyway?”

“
HRT’s tryouts. I got official word today.”

Lauren reached for the guitar pick earring in her left ear.
“Speak English, Nate. What’s HRT?”

“
The FBI’s Hostage Rescue Team.” So far Lauren had remained remarkably calm through the conversation. “It’s the Special Forces of the FBI,” he added, when the confused look remained on Lauren’s face.

“
And every office has one of these teams?” The words came out slowly, and he knew he needed to share the rest.

“
No. The team is divided into three units, but all are stationed down in Quantico. If I make it, we’ll move down there.”

Lauren nodded once as she withdrew her hand from his.
“There is no if about it. When you decide to do something you never fail, Nate. We both know that.”

The sound of her voice, distant and emotionless, sent icy spikes of dread up his spine.
“Anything is possible. It’s a rigorous trial. Most agents don’t make the cut.”

“
You said you just got official word today. So you’ve known about this for a while, haven’t you?”

The fact that she didn
’t appear overly concerned about the wedding date worried him. He’d expected an argument about pushing the date up. He had not anticipated her main concern to center on his possible reassignment.

“
I’ve planned on trying for the team since I applied to the FBI, but I didn’t know if I’d ever get the chance. Right before we went up to New Hampshire a rumor started going around that they were holding tryouts this summer.”

“
So, that whole line you gave me about being back for good was bull? You’ve always known you would leave.” Lauren walked away from the table. When she reached the railing she turned back around. “You asked me to marry you and didn’t bother to tell me any of this first?”

“
When I said that, I meant it. The team doesn’t hold tryouts on a regular basis, so I didn’t know if I’d ever get the chance. Besides, the team is selective. They don’t pick everyone.” Shouting and outbursts of anger he could handle. This cold, detached attitude he didn’t know how to approach. “When I heard the rumor, I figured it didn’t matter. Who cares where we live anyway? You always said you wanted to move away from New England.” Nate joined her by the railing, but when he reached for her she avoided his arms.

“
I was a teenager when I said that.”

“
Come on, Lauren. This doesn’t really change our plans.” He reached for her again. This time he got his arms around her waist. “We’ll get married before I go. If I make it we’ll buy a house down there and move. If I don’t we’ll stay here until we need a bigger place.”

Lauren laughed, a bitter hollow sound that had him tightening his hold on her.

“You just don’t get it. You’re still thinking of only yourself just like before. Maybe I don’t want to move. My life is here, Nate.”

“
It’s Virginia, not the North Pole. You can make the drive in less than a day.”

Before he could stop her, she pushed away from his arms.
“I don’t know if I can do this.”

She slipped the engagement ring off her finger and his heart parachuted out of his chest.
“Come on, sweetheart. You don’t mean that. You’re mad. I get it. Let’s talk about it and then get some sleep. Tomorrow I’ll help you change everything for the wedding.”

She pulled his hand toward her and dropped the ring in his open palm.
“Nate, there’s nothing to talk about.”

Fear and frustration collided head-on inside him.
“Don’t do this.”

Lauren
’s tear-filled eyes met his. “I didn’t do anything. You did. Once again, you figured you knew what was best for both of us. Just like after high school.”

“
That’s—”

“
I need some space. You can sleep in the guest room tonight.” She wiped the tear away from her cheek. “I’ll go to Newport this weekend by myself. When I come back, you can’t be here.”

His legs suddenly sprouted roots. He watched in silence as she walked into the house and closed the door behind her. Lauren loved him. He clenched his fists, the diamond ring biting into
his skin. Tomorrow they’d talk and get everything straightened out. She just needed a little time tonight.

Lauren wrapped the down comforter around her. Even with the early June temperature and heavy material she shivered. The cold she felt had nothing to do with her environment. It radiated from the gaping hole around her heart.

Rolling over, her cheek hit the other pillow. The scent of Nate
’s shampoo and soap filled her senses, and she pushed the pillow off the bed. He’d only been living with her a short while, but without him the bed felt empty.
She
felt empty, as if a hand had reached into her chest and yanked her heart out. How had she let him do it to her again? Why had she ever let him back in?

When he left the first time, it had taken months to get on with her life. Why had she risked that again? Sure, this time he wasn
’t leaving in the same way, but once again he’d gone and made a significant life-altering decision without consulting her first. He knew her life was here. He should have told her upfront about the possibility of a move to Virginia.

If he
’d told me
. . . Lauren’s thoughts trailed off. She would have what? Not let him back into her life? She didn’t know anymore. She loved him. Always had. But how could they have a relationship when he made all the decisions? How could they last when he kept secrets from her? Even with as much as they loved each other—and she didn’t doubt that he loved her—it wouldn’t work if he always put his needs and desires first. Marriage needed to be a partnership between two people who loved each other, not a dictatorship with Nate calling all the shots.

Another round of tears pressed against her eyes.
“Turn it off for tonight.” Tomorrow the pain would still be there. Tonight she needed some sleep.

***

Her alarm clock read ten o’clock. By now the coast would be clear. The latest Nate had ever left for work was eight. Besides, she had plans for the day. She’d taken her last personal day off so she could drive down to Newport. The week before, Sara had called inviting her and Nate to Cliff House a day early so the two of them, along with Charlie, could plan a baby shower for Callie. Though sooner than necessary, it made sense to meet now and plan, since they were all attending a fundraiser at Cliff House that Saturday night anyway.

Before she could even consider packing for her weekend trip, she needed coffee and something for her splitting headache. A night of crying had done only two things: given her a monster-sized headache and red eyes.

He won’t still be here
. Lauren pulled open the bedroom door. Across the hall the guest bedroom door stood open and the bed was neatly made. The entire house remained quiet, like it had always been before Nate moved in.
He’s gone.
She exhaled. Thank goodness. She couldn’t face him this morning.

Behind her,
JoJo’s toenails clicked on the hardwood floor, the only sound as she headed toward the kitchen. The scent of coffee still lingered in the air.

The floor beneath her bare feet changed from wood to tile. The minute her feet hit the cold tile, she froze.

“I just made another pot,” Nate said. He sat at the counter, an empty plate before him and a coffee mug in his hand. He’d showered and dressed but appeared in no rush to go.

Lauren unglued her feet then crossed to let the dog outside without meeting his eyes.
“Thanks. I need it.” Her eyes focused on the picture near the sink as she opened a cabinet. When her skin began to tingle, she knew without turning around that Nate stood behind her. Still, she ignored him and grabbed a mug. When his hand wrapped around her upper arm she paused but still refused to turn around.

“
Talk to me, Lauren.”

Her shoulders slumped.
“There’s nothing to talk about. I told you last night. I need some space.”

“
For how long?” His voice took on a note of desperation.

Days, months.
Who knew? “I don’t know,” she said, her voice soft.

With no warning, he spun her around so that they faced each other. She saw the dark circles under his eyes, evidence that he
’d had as bad a night as she. “Damn it. That’s not good enough. I love you, you love me. Whatever the problem, let’s settle it now so we can move on. I need to be in Virginia next month. I want us married before I go.”

Did he not understand the meaning of
I need space
? “Then you should have thought of that before you made decisions for us without asking me. You’ve done it twice now. This time I’m calling the shots, Nate.” She poked him in the chest. “When I figure it out, I’ll let you know.” Before he could add anything, she yanked her arm away. “I need to get ready.” Grabbing her coffee off the counter, she marched back to her room.

Seconds later, the bedroom door swung open and crashed into the wall.
Why didn’t I lock it?
Crossing her arms, she waited.

“
I don’t want things left like this between us.”

His tortured expression pulled at her heart. She didn
’t want to hurt him, but she needed time. His latest news and actions threw her emotions into a new tailspin.

“
Can you wait until later to leave so we can talk tonight? I’ll come home early as planned.” Nate never pleaded. Right now his voice bordered on it.

Some of her anger faded. He really didn
’t realize he’d been in the wrong. “It’s not about talking.” She let her arms fall by her sides. “It’s about what I need, Nate.”

“
Lauren . . . “ His voice trailed off as he nodded and walked into the room. “This is yours.” He dropped the ring on her bureau. “Have a safe trip.” He placed a kiss on her cheek. “I love you.”