The Black Opal (21 page)

They see omens and such things everywhere. “

“It was kind of them to be so concerned.”

“They’re our friends. Didn’t I give them a mouth organ?

167 It may be they were just being especially hospitable, just telling us how sorry they were our stay was not longer so why didn’t we extend it a bit? Or perhaps it was simply something they got into their heads. It may have been something to do with your nearly dropping the stirrup cup. “

“It gave me such a fright.”

“I’m not surprised. I don’t suppose anyone ever came near to dropping it before. My dear girl, you ought to have realized you were holding a sacred emblem.”

“I did. That was why I was so nervous.”

“Well, that little jaunt is over. No more sacred drinking for a while.”

“It was all very interesting, but I was scared at one point that they were not going to allow us to get away.”

“And now, here we are, safe with the Lady of the Seas. Doesn’t she look a beauty?”

“You love the old ship, don’t you?”

“I do. But I love my daughter more.”

And at midnight we sailed.

During the early hours of the morning a strong wind blew up. I was awakened once or twice by the rocking of the ship and lay for some time listening to the creaking of her timbers. At times it seemed as though the Lady was protesting quite strongly.

During the late morning it abated a little, but there was a strong swell and it was too windy to go on deck. As night fell it worsened and I did not see Toby. I was experienced enough to know now that when the weather was bad it was necessary for him to be in charge in person and there could be no delegating to his deputies.

I retired fairly early. Sleep was not easy and I dozed fitfully. The movement of the ship was increasing. Tropical storms could be fierce and it was certain that we were close to one now. I wondered whether

Toby would attempt to take the ship into some harbour, if it were possible to find one.

I was fast asleep when I was awakened by the clanging of bells. I knew what this meant. The ship was in difficulties. We had been instructed as to what to do in such cases. One put on warm clothing, took one’s life belt and made one’s way to the nearest deck.

I fumbled with my clothes. I was thinking: If I can get to Toby . I must get to Toby.

But Toby would be at his post and there was no place for me there. But he would want me to be with him. I must find my way there.

Trembling, I buttoned up my coat and tied a scarf over my head. It was difficult to stand up and keep my balance.

I pulled open the door of my cabin and stumbled out into the alleyway.

The noise was deafening. It sounded as though something was breaking up everywhere. I staggered along to the companionway. The ship seemed different. It was hard to recognize familiar places. Furniture was lying broken in the wrong place. I could hear people shouting.

I must find my way to Toby.

I mounted the companionway. I felt a rush of air. I was now in a violent wind. I was close to the deck. There had been a door but it seemed not to be there now. Then I found I was staggering along the deck. I was unprepared for the force of the wind. It caught me and dragged me forward and then threw me back. I fell and with great difficulty scrambled to my feet. It was impossible to stand upright. I gripped a rail and stood, clinging to it. Everything seemed different.

Where was I? Nothing looked as it had before.

I was bewildered and very frightened. There was one thought which would not be dismissed. I must find Toby. We must be together.

I tried to be calm. This must be the way, although it

looked different. I must find my way to the bridge. He would certainly be there. He had to look after the ship and I must be near him.

I managed to move along the deck. Now there were people everywhere.

They were letting down the lifeboats, those which such a short time before had taken us to the island.

The ship gave a sudden tilt. I was falling . sliding . I heard shouting. I tried to get up but could not move.

There was deafening noise everywhere. I heard a scream.

Someone was lifting me up.

“Toby,” I said.

“Toby.”

I was in a boat. It was uncomfortable. All I was aware of was that my leg was hurting. I was sitting on one side of the Chief, Toby was on the other. He was winking at me and saying: “Don’t let them see you are not drinking.”

Rock, rock, rock went the boat. Someone was putting something to my lips. I drank. It was fiery.

“Commonwood wouldn’t be the same now,” I heard Toby saying.

Then the rocking and oblivion.

I was on a ship. I could feel the familiar movement. Then it was quiet. I remembered. There had been a storm, but it was all right now.

I was in bed and someone was bending over me, but I was too tired to open my eyes.

The time came when I did open them. I knew for certain that I was on a ship, but it was not the Lady of the Seas. My leg hurt. I tried to move it but 1 couldn’t. I could feel that it was bandaged.

A woman came by. She was in the uniform of a nurse. 1 called to her.

She said: “Hello. So you’ve surfaced, have you?”

“Where am I?” I asked.

“On the Island Queen.”

“But…”

“We picked you up. You’re all right now. Leg came to grief, but it’s getting better.”

“What … happened?”

“You get some rest and we’ll have a long talk about it later.”

But. “

She was gone.

How had I come to be here? I was too tired to think. I had been on the Lady of the Seas. What had she said? The Island Queenf No . it was too much . and I was too tired.

I floated into oblivion. I was in the garden at Commonwood House. Mrs.

Marline was shouting at Adeline and Miss Carson was comforting her.

Then I was in the woods. Zingara was sitting on the steps of the caravan.

“I am your mother,” she was saying.

I was struggling to get out, to come back to what I vaguely knew was real. I was on a ship which was not the Lady of the Seas. Then where was Toby’s ship? And where was Toby?

“Hello,” said the nurse.

“Feeling better?”

I nodded.

“That’s the spirit. Leg’s not badly hurt. It’ll right itself in time.

You’ve had a nasty shock. “

I said: “What happened? ” “The weather was very bad. It can be like that in these seas. We picked you up. We’re taking you to Sydney. You’ve got people there, haven’t you?”

1 said: “The ship … the Lady of the Seas… ?”

“It seems she was on her last legs. Been around a bit. Could be an inquiry.”

I could not grasp what she was talking about.

“Don’t you fret,” she went on.

“You’re safe now. You were one of the lucky ones.”

“The lucky ones.” I was floundering for words which

would not come, perhaps because I was afraid to say them.

“What … what happened?”

“She was lost… and quite of number of poor souls with her.”

The Captain? “

“Well, dear, the Captain is always the last to leave the ship, isn’t he?”

It was the ship’s doctor who told me.

He had discovered that Toby was my father and he was very gentle.

He took my hands and said: “You see, it was a violent storm. They get them now and then in these waters. The ship couldn’t stand up to it.

Quite a number of people went down with her. I’m going to give you something to make you sleep. That’s what you need. “

I had lost him. All my happiness, all my dreams of the future . gone. An ageing vessel and a merciless sea had taken that away from me.

I had lost the one I loved above all others. I was aware of nothing but complete desolation.

Echoes from the Past

Elsie was waiting for me when I arrived in Sydney. We clung together in our misery. We hardly spoke at all as we drove to the house. Then she asked a few questions about my leg. The bones were not broken but there were deep cuts and bruises. I had suffered mainly from shock and concussion.

Mabel, Adelaide and Jane were waiting, but the air of well-being had completely disappeared. It was a house in mourning.

Neither Elsie nor I could speak of him on the first night. The great comfort was that our grief was understood and shared. Something had gone from our lives which could never be regained.

I lay sleepless that night. I kept going over scenes from the past. He had filled my life, and now he had gone there was nothing left.

If only we had not been in that spot on that night. Many people had said “If only’ at some time in their lives. If only this … if only that … It was the well-worn cry of those in despair. I thought of that ceremony on the island and the way in which they had tried to hold us back. That wise old man had known that Toby was going into danger. Perhaps he did indeed have special powers. Perhaps he could see into the future. He had lived all his life on that island; he would be weather-wise. He could have seen the signs of the coming storm. He had been warning us, urging us to delay our journey. Oh, if only we had taken heed! If only … if only.

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And so I went on.

Daylight came at last a dreary day lay ahead because he was not there and we were weighed down by the dreadful knowledge that we should never see him again.

A few days passed and suddenly we found that we could talk of him.

Elsie recalled stories of him. I would listen and then tell my own.

Then one day she said to me: “Carmel, this won’t do, you know. Think how he would laugh at us if he were here. We had the joy of knowing him, and he brightened our lives. But when something’s over and you know that all the wishing in the world won’t bring it back, you’ve got to accept it as it is. We’ve got to bestir ourselves.”

I said: “You’re right. But how?”

“That’s what we’ve got to find out. We’ve got our friends and we’ve got some good ones.”

She was right. The Formans were always trying to cheer us up. I saw a great deal of James and Gertie. Joe Lester was constantly around; and everyone we knew did all they could to help us. We were constantly invited out to dine and there were a great many callers.

One day Gertie said to me: “I’ve heard from Aunt Beatrice. She’s ever so keen for me to go and see her.”

“You mean, the aunt in England?”

She nodded.

“We always got on when I was little. She didn’t have any children and I think she liked to think of me as hers. We write regularly. Now they’re getting things into shape here, I don’t think they’d mind if I went over to stay with her for a bit.”

“It sounds exciting.”

“Doesn’t it? You ought to come.”

I looked at her in amazement.

“Why not? You can’t mope all your life.”

“Mope …?” I said.

“You’re not like you used to be. I know it was awful and how fond you were of each other, but you can’t go on mourning for ever.”

“Go home,” I murmured.

“My father says if I’m so set on it, I’d better do it. He’ll pay my fare and run to a small allowance while I’m there. You wouldn’t have to bother about that. You’re an independent woman now.”

She was right. Toby had left the bulk of his fortune to me and it was not inconsiderable. Elsie had been taken care of, too. It suddenly occurred to me that, if I wished to, I could travel. Gertie was watching me closely.

“Well?”

“I hadn’t thought about going home.”

“Think about it now. My mother suggested you might like to go with me.

She said it would do you good. Get you out of yourself. You’re never going to get any better while you sit around remembering. What do you think about my going home? “

“I hadn’t thought about it really.”

“You haven’t thought about anything but yourself for the last months.”

Gertie had kept the frankness of our younger days when she had never disguised the truth, however brutal. She went on: “The trouble with you is that you are shut in with yourself. Something awful happened to you and you won’t let yourself-or anyone else-forget it.”

Then suddenly she laid her hand on my arm.

“I’m sorry,” she went on.

“I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Yes,” I said.

“You should. It’s true.”

“It’s that thing I’ve heard about taking your troubles out and teaching them to swim rather than drowning them.”

I was thoughtful and, after a pause, she went on: “Well, you could consider it.”

I went home and told Elsie what she had said. I knew i75

that Elsie would not want me to go away, and she was very thoughtful as she listened.

To her aunt,” she said.

“Well, we have heard a great deal about Gertie’s aunt. I guessed Gertie would go sometime. She’d made up her mind. I think … perhaps it would do you good to go with her.”

“Do you?”

“There’s nothing like a complete change when these things happen. I rather think you have accepted grief as a permanency. It was such a terrible blow. It was the worst of tragedies. He was so lovable and meant so much to you. We can’t forget him, but he’s gone, and we can’t let him dominate our lives. I am sure, if he were here, he would say the same. You don’t have to decide right away. You should think about it, though.”

“Elsie,” I said, “I should hate to leave you.”

“You mustn’t feel that. I love to have you here, of course. You’ve been my daughter. But you have your life and here … it’s hard to forget. You ought to be meeting people fresh people. You could at home. I have something to tell you. Then you will see that I should not be so lone and lorn that you have to stay and look after me. I am thinking of getting married.”

“Elsie!”

“Yes. Joe and I have been friends for a long time. Toby used to say, ” You would have done better to have married Joe. He’d have made a better husband than I ever would. ” In a way he was right. It wouldn’t have been the same, though. It’s all over now, so Joe and I can marry and it’s what he’s wanted for a long time. And I want it too, so I shouldn’t be alone.”