The Bloodless (17 page)

              Regardless of their mental states, everyone was present and accounted for and ready to get back into it. “All right,” I addressed the group at large, “we know what we have to do. I wish I could stand here and tell you that the plan is the exact same as the last one, but it’s not. In their attempt to make everything as complicated as possible when designing these stations, they made every one as different from the next as they could. This is a whole different building layout and the location is completely different in terrain and fortifications. The best news is that it gets tougher and tougher as we get closer to the compound.”

              And with déjà vu dancing through my head, I went into the explanation of the plan Fox and I had come up with. Luckily Fox had been casing the station during the hiatus and gathered a pretty detailed list of its weaknesses and strengths. We had allocated points for lookouts and likely paths that patrols could venture through, specific to this particular station. “The good thing about this station is that it doesn’t seem to have much fleshy protection, the majority of it is self-contained and automated.

              “It’s a fairly large building, probably the biggest substation we’ll come across. It doubled as a satellite laboratory for some of our more fringe experiments. Ones that weren’t fully developed and still in the planning stages. It’s not going to be tough to access as there is a large utility entrance that we can use to get inside. We’ll have to be quicker this time. The automated surveillance systems won’t stay down for long.”

              “What’s the point?” Here we go. Pillar backed away from the group as if about to leave.

              “The point of what?” I replied.

              “The point to all of this? Why are WE the ones putting OUR lives on the line for a bunch of people who won’t even appreciate it?”

              “Because we have to fight back, we can’t just let this happen. People are being ruthlessly killed for no reason,” I said.

              “Pillar,” Fox spoke up, “you are volunteering your time to be here, we have never once forced you to do any of this. If you think it is a massive miscarriage of justice for you to be here, then by all means, go elsewhere. Retreat, go hide and wait for other people to take care of all the problems.”

              “Thank you,” I said, appreciating Fox’s cool demeanor. “If everyone were to just sit back all the time, waiting for other people to do the heavy lifting, nothing would get done. Now, since I know how to fix all of this, I am here doing what I can. If you feel your talents would be best served doing something else, you can go.”

              Pillar sat there for a moment, not speaking as she usually does when she is made to look infantile. “Whatever,” she finally said. “I’ll stay but I’m not doin’ any more work than what’s asked of me.”

              “That’s all I can expect from anyone here,” I said as a small wave of relief washed over me. I really didn’t want to go out and have to recruit a new heavy weapons specialist. Especially since we were so close to striking our next target.

              Heavy weapons specialists were hard to find, particularly in northwest New Mexico. It was pure luck we were even able to get Pillar to join us in the first place, let alone keep convincing her not to leave. Believe it or not, we actually found her and Buggs in the same town, they were traveling together at the time. An odd combo but apparently it worked for them.

              “Is there anyone else who is having doubts?” I asked the group. “Speak up now because I’d like to know what we are working with before going into this substation.” Nobody spoke, there was kind of an embarrassed silence. I assumed a few of them wanted to say something but their pride wouldn’t allow them to. I had them all make promises to do everything within their power to see this through to the end. This wasn’t one of those things that can be done solo, this wasn’t golf. No, it was much more exciting than that. None of them wanted to break their promises, save for Pillar who might break it for an ice cream sandwich, but I figured we’d deal with that when the time came.

              The mood amongst the group was very somber as I knew we were all remembering the previous mission. It certainly hadn’t gone the way we drew it up but I had convinced myself that the outcome had been the one we wanted, despite the horrific path we had to go down to get there. It was the only way I was able to maintain my sanity and hold onto what little resolve I still had. I was relying on the taking down of the second station to hopefully boost that resolve and maybe give all of us the confidence we needed to make it through to the end.

              Once again I offered them the option to go and do whatever they had to before the mission, whether that was gather supplies or be alone to get their minds right. However, nobody went anywhere. They all decided to take refuge for the next couple nights in nearby buildings in Abiyah. We took turns patrolling close by just to be sure we didn’t have any surprises or unwanted visitors. Nothing transpired in the few days we took to shore up our gear and mission plans which was nice and it allowed us to be as ready to go as possible the eve before.

              That night none of us slept, at least that’s what I assumed since I didn’t sleep. There was a rumor that Buggs never had a problem sleeping at any time, which would make sense but it’s not something I can confirm. Regardless of that, it was a very anxious night but when the ostensible dawn came, we had all gathered outside the shack again, our game faces securely on our heads.

CHAPTER 10

Pay No Attention to the Monster
Behind the Curtain
 

              Chilly. That’s the best way I can describe the morning of our assault on the second power substation.  It wasn’t a particularly cold day either, there was just a foreboding in the air and that sense of déjà vu I felt a few days prior had yet to abate. Even though we had the attack planned down to every last possible detail, I still didn’t feel ready. Maybe it was some left over reservations from our previous debacle, but I had a strong feeling we just weren’t ready. I forced myself to ignore that feeling and going against my instincts wasn’t something I normally did.

              I set out some of the supplies I had gathered the nights leading up to that day; grenades, loose magazines, and various first aid supplies and waited for everyone else to show up. Fox was reliably the first to show and soon the rest trickled in. For a split, mind flattening second I waited for Crist to show up, but then I remembered and felt like an asshole, a little sad too, but mostly an asshole.

              “Okay, it looks like we’re all here. I’m not exactly a morning person, but I’m gonna do my best here,” I said, confidence not brimming from my every orifice.

              “I got this boss,” Burns said as he stepped into the middle of the group. This was very unusual for him but a burning look of determination flickered in his eyes as he looked around at every one of us. “We may not all be here for the same reasons, hell, some us may not even WANT to be here. But we are here and we all got someone we fightin’ for. Even if it’s yourself, you still fightin’ for someone. But today, we need to fight for each other. Last time we lost one of our own. It ain’t happenin’ again. We have to watch each other’s backs, trust each other, and make sure we all come back home.

              “I don’t know ‘bout ya’ll, but I wanna see the sun rise tomorrow, and if that means survive today, then that’s what we gonna do. All of us. Keep an eye out for your brother,” he pointed at Crowder, “your sister,” he pointed at Saturn, “yourself and everyone in between. We takin’ those rot infested bastards down today and they ain’t takin’ none of us with ‘em!”

              There was an electric charge that I felt course through my body and it was obvious everyone else felt it too. Eyes lit up, bodies swayed with anticipation, and hearts sped up from the rush of adrenaline that started to kick in.

              “However, if today is our day to die, then we ain’t goin’ down without a fight! If they want to kill us, they gonna have to bring everything they got! We a dangerous group of motha’ fuckas and every Bloodless in our path is goin’ to learn that today! If any of us go down, we ALL go down, and if we all go down, THEY ALL. GO! DOWN!”

              God damn, we were so hyped up we felt like we could take down the whole facility right then and there. We roared our response. We all put our hands on Burns’ hand and did a sports thing where we all then threw our hands in the air. I’m not real familiar with those practices but I was able to just mimic everyone else. And needless to say, I definitely felt less anxious about our mission; not comfortable, just less anxious.

              Since there was one less person this time around, it was possible to go in pairs. However, since Fox insisted he be on his own, there was an odd man out so I decided to take Crowder with me. I figured it would be a nice opportunity to get to know him since I hadn’t really talked to him much before that.

              Of course Fox set off first to scout the area. He wanted to make sure all our previous scouting was accurate about the location. If there was ever anyone who loved scouting, it was Fox

              Crowder and I set off down our predetermined path towards the substation. As we walked I looked over at him to try and get a gauge of who I was working with. His face was a little pale and I could see he was shaking slightly. Not a good start. I had to try to calm him down. “How you feelin’ Crowder?”

              He jumped slightly, as though he may have been deep in thought. “I-I’m doing good,” he said, forcing confidence into his voice.

              “You sure about that? You don’t look too good.”

              “I’m fine. Why?”

              “You’re shaking and you look like you might vomit soon.”

              He resigned himself a little and turned to look at me, “Okay, well, the truth is that I don’t have the greatest feeling about this.”

              “You’re not the only one, kid.”

              “You mean… you?”

              “Look, we all have our doubts and concerns from time to time. The trick is reasoning with yourself and remembering everything you have going for you. Take right now for instance.” I shifted my bag to my other side to balance out the weight before continuing. “I woke up not feeling especially confident about today’s mission. No seriously,” I said when he gave me a disbelieving look. “These things happen, but did you hear Burns just now? How are you not bursting at the seams with confidence?”

              “I mean, yeah, that helped a little, but I still got my doubts, you know?”

              “Yup. I’ve had my doubts in the past as well, still have ‘em. You just have to learn to trust the powers that be. What happens, happens, and that’s the way it’s supposed to be. The only thing we can do is make the best decision we can for the situation at hand.” I don’t know why I was trying so hard with him, maybe it had something to do with the way I treated him when I first met him. “We may not know the reason right away, but that much isn’t meant for us to know. We just have to live our lives, make smart choices, and trust that things will work out in the end. They always do, whether it’s bad or good, things always work out.”

              “Wow, I never really thought about things that way,” Crowder said and he had a little more pep in his voice.

              “How do you think about things?” I asked.

              “Mr. Halsted taught me that God has a plan for all of us, a plan that has already been determined,” Crowder said looking slightly embarrassed.

              “Well, our philosophies really aren’t that far off, if you think about it. You think that everything is predetermined, already decided. I think that things happen for a reason. The difference being that you think about it as already happened where I look at it as though it’s happening right now.”

              “So you think I should start living more in the present?”

              “I can’t really tell you how to live your life, I’m just telling you how I live mine and that it’s worked for me so far.” He didn’t look very reassured so I changed the subject, “You have any family?”

              “I used to,” he started. Shit, I thought to myself. From one sore subject to the next I guess.

              “What happened?”

              “The Cloud, took ‘em all. I was away when it happened

              “I know how you feel Crowder, trust me. I’m sure you miss them.”

              “Sometimes I still think about my parents,” Crowder said nodding, “but mostly I miss my brothers and sisters.” I could see the pain in his eyes as he began to think about them. We continued to walk but mostly in silence. Every once in a while I would point out some points of interest I thought he might like to know about. Me being a scientist, I flew under the motto that you can never have too much information.

              “See that building over there?”

              “Yeah.”

              “That used to be THE main social spot, everyone from work and around town would go there in the evenings and blow off steam. However, unbeknownst to just about everybody, the basement was a major drug manufacturing site.”

              “Really?” He seemed genuinely interested, which I liked because then I didn’t feel like I was talking for nothing like a common high school science teacher.

              “Yup. The basement was reinforced to withstand two nuclear explosions. Needless to say, the walls were ridiculously thick and there was an industrial ventilation system installed. Now, whether that was done on purpose by the builders or not, I’m not sure. Either way, it proved to be an ideal spot to produce some of the best meth the world has ever known.”

              “Wow, that’s kinda cool. Not the drug part, but just the fact something like that existed in a town like this.”

              “I have to ask you something,” I said to Crowder. He looked at me suspiciously. “I know the environment where you came from, but did you go there and then learn all about god or did you already believe?” This was actually a big question to ask someone because the answer could make a world of difference.

              “The reason I went to Jericho was because it felt familiar and safe,” Crowder said sounding a little nervous. “I didn’t think there was another place in the country that had the same beliefs as me.”

              “Okay, do you understand how ridiculous the idea of the Christian god is? There’s only one all powerful, omnipotent, old, gray bearded white man in the clouds looking down upon us all? Come on, do you really believe that?”

              Crowder chuckled, “Not that exactly,” he said. “I mean look at me, do I look like someone who believes some pasty old man is the creator of this universe? It’s hard to explain, it’s one of those things you have to see to believe.”

              I looked at him suspiciously, “You’ve seen god?”

              “No, not like that. I mean, just the work and the good deeds that have been carried out in his name. For me, God isn’t necessarily a physical being, it’s more of a spirit that fills those who believe in Him. He gives me the power to do what I have to do in order to help my fellow man.”

              “God sounds a lot like love,” I said. By then we had passed beyond Abiyah’s city limits. We came to a fork in the road; one way led to the first substation, a place we definitely didn’t want to revisit. We took the alternate route that kept us moving towards our destination. I could see Burns and Pillar off in the distance, north of our current position as we traveled east.

              “God IS love, the embodiment of love and all things good,” Crowder explained. “My youth pastor always told me that all things are possible through God because He gives us the strength we need to be who we are.”

              “I don’t know man,” I said still in disagreement. To be fair though, there was as much of a chance proving to me the existence of the Christian god as there was getting Alexander Jefferson to believe money isn’t everything. “It just all seems so farfetched, especially given all the advancements in science the human race has made. I mean, we know for a fact that there are other forms of life beyond our solar system, did your god create those beings as well?”

              “Look, Daniel,” Crowder said as he stopped and turned to me, “I don’t have all the answers and I’ll never claim to. All I know is that what I’ve believed in up to this point in my life has made me who I am today, and I believe it has made me a better person.”

              “That’s bullshit man,” I retorted. I could feel a twinge of annoyance creeping up in me. “That argument has been debunked for years! The belief in god doesn’t make you a good person, being a good person makes you a good person. Human beings are inherently imbued with a sense of what’s right and wrong, it doesn’t come from some ancient tablets of stone that may or may not have ever existed. In fact, studies that were done decades ago showed that people who belonged to a monotheistic religion were more likely to commit horrific human rights atrocities in the name of their god. Let’s keep moving,” I added after realizing how long we had stopped to talk.

              “It’s like I said,” Crowder said as we resumed walking along our path, “it’s what’s worked for me and I’m not ashamed of it.”

              “Oh hey,” I said, “I’m not saying don’t believe in what you believe in. If it works for you, more power to you. I’m just saying that it has never made sense to me and there’s a reason religion has been phased out of society.”

              “I guess it’s a good thing that non-believers are more tolerant of us than we were of them.”

              I nodded in agreement and we continued towards our destination and I pointed out a few more points of interest but the remainder of the journey was mostly spent in silence. Even though we were fairly certain we wouldn’t hit any Bloodless on our way to the substation, it was still a good idea to keep as low a profile as possible. We took a different route than usual this time which took us through the outskirts of town I had either never been through or didn’t recall.

              For a place that had already been dismantled, it was a pretty run down area of Abiyah. There wasn’t a whole lot going on in this part of town. A couple high capacity, low income apartments towered over the street. Large chunks of their facades were strewn about the asphalt creating obstacles we were forced to negotiate. When I say low income here, I mean low income compared to the executive team but still WELL above the national average.

              It was largely an urban landscape, not much nature to look at during our march but the whole town was basically an architectural experiment and featured some of the strangest buildings anyone had seen at that point. Unconventional would be a word you could use to start describing them, but it wouldn’t do the deed properly.