The Book of Death (39 page)

‘You called the Professor a
cunt?’

‘Yeah. In my defence, though, he
had just stabbed me.’

Vanity looked somewhat perplexed.
‘I’d have done more than just call him a cunt.’

Dante reached the front doors
and peered around them. The reception hall was empty. ‘I don’t like the look of
this,’ he said. ‘Something’s not right.’

Vanity strolled confidently past
him into the reception area. ‘Don’t be such a wuss. This is a good omen,’ he
said. ‘All we’ve gotta do is find Gaius and we’re home. This couldn’t have
worked out better.’

Dante frowned. ‘I’m no genius,
but this looks a bit fucking suspect to me. Don’t you think this whole thing is
a bit odd? I mean, what if Gaius knows we’re coming? We could be walking into a
trap.’

Vanity smiled. ‘You’re right
about one thing.’

‘What’s that?’

‘You’re no genius.’

‘Thanks. You’re hardly Alfred
Einstein yourself.’

‘Albert.’

‘Huh?’

Vanity shook his head. ‘Look
man, you’re just being paranoid. Come on, let’s try downstairs and see if he’s
around. We should hurry. Don’t want to miss our chance.’

Vanity seemed very keen to get
down to the main hall. Now Dante was relatively aware of the fact that most
people thought he was a moron. Kacy frequently warned him about rushing
headlong into trouble. And his gut instincts were telling him this was trouble.
Why on earth should he trust Vanity? Kacy had been convinced by his story about
wanting to be human again because she’d seen his wedding video. Dante hadn’t
seen it. All he’d ever seen was that Vanity liked killing people and drinking
their blood. And he could kick a clown’s ass as well as anyone. But Dante
hadn’t really seen any signs of remorse from him. He seemed to love being a
vampire. Some clarification was required.

‘Vanity.’

‘Come on man,’ Vanity said, once
more waving him along to the corridor at the end of the reception area.

‘Are you on the level here?’

‘What?’

‘Are you setting me up?’

Vanity looked puzzled. ‘What do
you mean?’

‘I mean, I smell a rat. I really
don’t see you desperately wanting to be human again. What I do see is you
leading me into a meeting with Gaius. And let me get this straight, you’re
telling me he comes here to have his eye cleaned?’

‘Polished.’

Dante took stock of what was
being said for a moment. Kacy had been so excited about this opportunity to get
their hands on the Eye that he had allowed himself to get caught up in it all
without really thinking it through.

‘Surely he can polish his own
eye. Jeez, it’s gotta be like wiping the lenses on your glasses, surely. He
could polish it with a fucking handkerchief, for fuck’s sake.’

Vanity frowned. ‘Are you calling
me a shit?’

‘No. I’m just saying that
something’s not right here. This doesn’t add up.’

Vanity walked aggressively
towards him. ‘You’re calling me a shit. You’re accusing me of setting you up!
After all I’ve fucking done for you. You muthafucker!’

Dante responded to the
aggression the best way he knew—by responding in kind. He stormed towards
Vanity and the pair of them stopped inches apart, staring one another down.

‘I
am
calling you a
shit,’ Dante snarled. ‘What the fuck is going on here? Are you my fucking
friend or what? Because right now I’ve got this feeling like you’re Rameses
Gaius’s bitch and you’re using me to get in his good books.’

There was an awkward silence as
he waited for Vanity to reply. The two of them stared at each other fiercely
for a few seconds until quite by surprise, Vanity’s face broke out into a huge
beaming smile. He laughed heartily and slapped Dante on the shoulder.

‘Haha, good one,’ he said. ‘You
almost had me then. I thought you were serious for a second there. Come on. The
time for joking around is over. We’ve gotta go pick a fight with a mummy before
it’s too late.’

He slapped Dante on the shoulder
again and then bounded back to the corridor at the back of the reception area.
Dante couldn’t work out what to make of it. Vanity seemed to think he was
kidding when he accused him of double crossing him. But he hadn’t been kidding.
He started following on after his laughing buddy, unsure of whether or not he
was making a terrible mistake.

As he reached the corridor he
felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Someone had sent him a text message. He
pulled his phone out of his pocket and flicked to the message. It was from
Kacy. It read –

VANITY LIED. GET AWAY FROM HIM.
I THINK IT’S A SETUP! CALL ME!

He read the message twice to
make sure he wasn’t misunderstanding it. He’d been right. Vanity
was
a
shit. And a bit of a cunt for that matter. He stopped walking and looked up to
see Vanity striding along the corridor up ahead with his back to him. He had a
chance to turn and run before Vanity noticed. He slipped his phone back in his
pocket and turned back to the museum’s front entrance.

As he turned he heard the sound
of the front doors being slammed shut. His eyes confirmed it. Standing in front
of the now closed doors in his shiny silver suit was Rameses Gaius. And his
precious blue stone was still lodged firmly in his right eye socket.

‘Mr Vittori,’ he said stepping
forward. ‘We meet again.’

‘Pardon?’ said Dante, pretending
not to have heard him.

Gaius looked irritated. ‘I said,
Mr Vittori, we meet again.’

‘Sorry, I still can’t hear ya,’ said
Dante, his eyes desperately searching for an escape route as Gaius walked
towards him.

‘I said, we meet again!’ Gaius
raised his voice, almost shouting.

‘What?’

Gaius stopped in the middle of
the reception area, approximately ten metres away from Dante. ‘Let me put it
another way,’ he said.

The giant mummy raised his right
arm. In the palm of his hand was a bright blue glowing light. Dante stared at
it, unable to work out what it was. It was unlike anything he’d ever seen.
Suddenly Gaius jolted his arm and the blue glow formed into a laser bolt. It
flew from his palm straight at Dante. It blasted into his chest. The sheer
force of it lifted him off his feet and he flew backwards through the air until
his head crashed into a wall behind him with a sickening crack. Everything went
black and as he drifted into a state of unconsciousness and slumped to the
floor, Dante hoped Kacy wouldn’t come looking for him without the Bourbon Kid.

Vanity dashed back to the
reception area to find Gaius standing over the crumpled, unconscious figure of
Dante. The Lord of the Undead looked mighty pleased with himself, which meant
that he was most likely pleased with Vanity too.

‘Too easy, huh boss?’ Vanity
said, grinning.

Gaius grinned back at him.
‘There’s nothing as simple as defeating the gullible, is there?’

‘Uh, yeah. So what’s next? You
still need me?’

Gaius glanced over Vanity’s
shoulder. ‘No,’ he said coldly. ‘We’ve no further need for you.’

Vanity didn’t like Gaius’s tone.
He spun around to see what it was that his boss was looking at behind him. Four
vampires from the Black Plague were approaching him from behind. He turned back
to Gaius.

‘I thought we had a deal,’ he
said, failing to mask the concern in his voice.

Gaius raised his right hand. His
palm was glowing blue. “I don’t make deals with people who double cross their
friends,’ he said.

‘Oh shit.’

Fifty

Beth could feel Razor’s gun
pressed into the base of her spine. In front of her she could see the outline
of Jessica. The Vampire Queen was leading the way into the darkened main hall.

By the time they had reached the
top of the staircase Beth’s eyes had gradually become accustomed to the dark.
She was able to make out the shapes of several statues and pillars in the hall
below. There was no sign of JD, but she knew he must be near. As if reading her
thoughts, Jessica spoke aloud.

‘He’s down here. I can smell the
bourbon on his breath.’ Raising her voice she called out into the darkness.
‘Show yourself! You can’t hide from me in the dark.’

What followed was the sound of a
door opening at the far end of the hall, quite some distance away. Beth made
out the sound of some muffled voices and then suddenly all of the lights in the
hall came on at once, lighting up everything brightly. Her eyes darted around
her surroundings, looking for JD. All she saw at the end of the room was
Sanchez the bartender being shoved in the back towards the centre of the room
by one of the Panda vampires. It was a female wearing an all black outfit, with
the exception of the red baseball cap on her head. Under her left arm she was
carrying a large black hardback book.

Jessica called out to her. ‘Is
that The Book of Death you’ve got there?’

Panda Girl nodded. ‘Yeah. This
guy brought it with him.’

Jessica reached the bottom of
the stairs and stepped onto the marble floor. She hissed at Sanchez. ‘So, you
found my book. How good of you, Sanchez.’

Sanchez shrugged. ‘Well, it was
nothing really. Perhaps you could just give me the reward and I’ll be on my
way?’

‘Why the rush?’ Jessica asked, a
mischievous grin breaking out on her face. ‘Why don’t you stay a while? We’re
having a party. Your friend the Bourbon Kid is here too. He’s about to show
himself to us any second now.’

Sanchez didn’t look too keen to
take her up on the invite. ‘It’s okay. I’ve got places to be,’ he said, turning
back towards the door through which he had come. Panda Girl wasn’t letting him
get away that easy. She grabbed his arm and yanked him back. Then she shoved
him hard, back toward the middle of the hall.

Jessica walked towards him,
looking all around her, no doubt waiting for the reappearance of the Kid. Razor
pressed his gun harder into Beth’s back and then gave her a push to indicate
that she should follow Jessica.

Panda Girl shoved Sanchez again,
a little more ferociously this time. She nodded at Jessica. ‘He wasn’t planning
on giving you the book at all,’ she said. ‘He found out you were a vampire and
had a change of heart. When I found him he was cowering in a bathroom and
trying to hide the book.’

‘That sounds like typical
Sanchez all right,’ said Jessica scornfully. ‘We’ll deal with him later. For
now I think it may be time to call out our mystery guest.’ She stared all
around the hall, looking once more for sign of the Kid, then she called out
loud. ‘Very well then. Razor,
kill the girl
.’

Beth felt a lump in her throat.
Razor’s gun had been pressed against the small of her back but the pressure was
relieved as he pulled it away. Although he was behind her, she could see his
arm moving out of the corner of her eye. He was about to shoot her in the head.
She closed her eyes and waited for the moment of truth. Would JD make his move
and reveal himself before Razor pulled the trigger?

She heard the safety click on
the gun as Razor released it, ready to fire.

‘WAIT!’ A gravelly voice called
out from behind them.

Beth looked over her shoulder.
Razor too, twisted around pointing his gun in the direction of where the voice
had come from. Stepping out from within the shadows of one of the many statues
in the hall was the Bourbon Kid, his long dark robe identifying him to
everyone, the hood pulled up over his head.

Razor pointed his pistol at him.

The Kid raised his hands in
surrender. ‘Hey, don’t shoot,’ he said calmly. ‘I came here to make a deal.’

Jessica swiftly appeared at
Beth’s side, her lightning dexterity making it seem as though she had appeared
out of thin air. This bitch was quick.

‘Drop your weapons!’ she hissed
at the Kid.

The Kid ignored her and pointed
at Razor. ‘Put your gun down,’ he said.

Razor had plans of his own. His
three best friends had all perished at the hands of the Kid so he wasn’t about
to pass up the opportunity for some payback. ‘No fucking way,’ he snarled. Then
without waiting for permission from anyone he squeezed the trigger on his gun.
The loud bang that followed was deafening. Beth covered her ears and winced.

JD had ducked out of the way of
the bullet before it was even fired. His response to the attack was emphatic.
As he rolled to one side he aimed his right arm in Beth’s direction. A silver
dart flew out of his sleeve. Before she had a chance to move the dart flashed
past her hip. It missed her by less than an inch and embedded itself into
Razor’s crotch. He doubled over and slumped to the ground howling in agony
clasping at the dart.

From behind her, Beth heard
Sanchez sum up the events in one overstated sentence.

‘
SHIIIIT!
He just shot
that guy in the dick!’ the bartender exclaimed.

Realising that she was suddenly
free of Razor’s grasp, Beth turned to flee. She had no idea where she was
intending to run to, but anywhere away from Jessica was a start. Unfortunately
Jessica was fully expecting such a move. She stepped in behind Beth and grabbed
her by the hair, yanking her head back. A moment later Beth felt the Vampire
Queen’s razor sharp fingernails pressed against her throat.