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Authors: David Michael Slater

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BOOK: The Book of Nonsense
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After a few more twists among the trees, the Clearing came into view. There was the soft bed of multi-colored leaves. There was the fuzzy moss blanketing the ground. There was the
peace
, thought Dex.

Once in the Clearing, everyone stopped to recuperate and have a look around.

“Ash trees!” Mrs. Kunyan announced. “How absolutely beautiful!” The others concurred, moving around for closer looks.

Ruby could contain herself no longer.

“You forced my hand!” she roared.“
Don't you meddling bunch of old windbags
ever SHUT UP?!

All talking ceased. Everyone looked stunned.

“Whatever do you mean?” Mr. Dwyfan asked. “Is this part of the game?”

“She means, this isn't a game,” Daphna moaned. “We've been trying to tell you. It's a real gun.”

Gradually, the Dwarves seemed to comprehend the situation. They looked from Daphna to Ruby, who was regarding them with withering scorn.

“Dexter and Daphna,” Ruby instructed, “if either of you make any effort to run, I'll shoot you in the legs and let you die slowly. If you do as I say, I will make it painless.”

Neither Dexter nor Daphna replied to this. Neither could.

Ruby turned her attention to the Dwarves. “All of you blowhards, just walk away,” she said. “Just go back to your lounge and deal out a new deck of cards.”

At first, none of the dwarves moved; they seemed petrified. Then someone moved, Mrs. Tapi, and the whole group followed suit.

They moved, but not away.

Instead, in a bunch, they stepped directly between the twins and Ruby.

“Move!” Ruby repeated. “This is not a game, I promise you!”

But no one did. In fact, they seemed to be hunkering down. It was as if, in the blink of an eye, they'd transformed into some sort of military outfit…

Daphna laughed. She couldn't help herself. She laughed right out loud, and hard. She thought her capacity to show amazement had been exhausted, yet she was amazed. Dex looked at her.


The Seven Dwarves
,” she whispered, shaking her head, marveling at her apparently infinite dimwittedness. “The triumph of
The Eight
. There were
seven
left when Mom died!”

Dex looked at the hunched backs now forming a half circle in front of him. Seven timeworn faces turned and nodded at him solemnly.

Ruby also understood. Her face fell momentarily, but she did not lower the gun.

“I should have known,” she sighed. “But no matter! The book is mine, and seven doddering fools can't do a thing about it.” She produced the book from her purse and held it aloft.

“It's over, Rose,” said Mr. Hina. “Let us have the book.”

Ruby, or Rose, laughed outright at this. “Do you think that portentous tone has an effect on me, you ridiculous old man?” she mocked. “I have an offer for you, though. When the Words of Power again pass these lips, I will make you my Overlords. All you have to do is step aside.”

There was a long pause, during which Mr. Hina seemed to be considering the offer. Then he said, oddly, “That's an old-fashioned gun, Rose.” He took a step, not to the side, but forward, directly toward Ruby. And then he began walking toward her, like he might approach a friend to shake hands.

With equal parts terror and resignation, Dex and Daphna watched the scene unfold.

When Mr. Hina was just a stride away from Ruby, a gunshot rent the air. At the same moment, a terrific thunderclap burst from the black clouds overhead. Sheets of rain came crashing down over the woods, pelting the Clearing and everyone in it.

Mr. Hina fell to the ground. Dex and Daphna weren't exactly sure what had happened—and now they couldn't see because the six others had stepped together, closing ranks. No one seemed to be speaking, but it was hard to hear anything through the hurtling downpour.

The twins huddled together, uselessly trying to shield each other from the rain. Soaked already, they cowered behind their aged human shields.

The Dwarves stood steady.

“Give us the book!” one of them shouted. Lightening cracked. A moment later, another spectacular thunderclap.

“You are all fools!” Ruby railed through the rain. “You will all die out here!”

In response to this, the entire group took a deliberate step forward, then another. A second shot rang out. One, two, three, four shots. Or was that thunder? It was booming before, between, after—there was no way to tell what was happening.

The twins dropped to the ground amidst further explosions. More gunshots? More thunder? The sounds were deafening. Brother and sister lay face down in the leaves.

Suddenly, everything went quiet, or seemed to. The sound of steady rain continued, but the thunder, the gunshots, the gutwrenching explosions were gone.

Dex and Daphna sat up, nearly blind with fear. Two figures were left standing in the distance. It was difficult to see clearly through the rain. A mist—or was it smoke?—seemed to have descended. They heard clicking, repeated clicking.

“An old-fashioned six-shooter!” a voice called out. Mrs. Tapi's. “It was over from the start!” she shouted.

“No!” Ruby yelled and took off running. She fell almost immediately over a body. Bodies were everywhere.

The rain suddenly stopped, but sounds were foreign. The landscape was bending. Dex and Daphna saw the lone figure still standing approach the one now getting to its knees. Light flashed from something it took from its pocket.

“Swallow,” Mrs. Tapi ordered, but then she added, almost tenderly, “Go in peace.”

There was the sound of a brief struggle, then the figure on its knees simply slipped to the ground and lay still.

Things seemed to go in slow motion then. Mrs. Tapi reached down and picked something up from the ground.

The book!

She carried it off to the side of the Clearing, just behind the twins, who did not, at first, turn to face her. There was the sound of a match being struck, then another. A voice then: Mrs. Tapi's again.

“Do not grieve,” she whispered. “Do not for a moment lament the melancholy events that have occurred in this place.

“When your mother informed us of her intention to abandon the search to raise a family, we were saddened, but not surprised. Several of us did the very same thing over the years, though our own tragedies brought each of us back. We were saddened to learn of her death, and we agreed to establish a watch over you in gratitude for all she had done. At least one of us has been here ever since, but we all came together recently to spend our final days together.

“Daphna, our plan was to reveal ourselves to you on your visit to us today, on your birthday, and ask you to bring Dexter to us, too. We hoped to recruit you to the search. We had no idea what was going on under our noses, I am ashamed to admit. Please do not be angry with us. Ruby looks nothing like she used to. Mr. Bergelmir saw you enter her room. It was we who triggered the building's alarm in hopes of discovering what was going on. We had little strength left, but enough for a moment like this. The only thing we all craved as much as completing our mission was an end to our wearied lives. Now, at long last, we have accomplished both. I will destroy this book once and for all. If I could just get a fire start—”

Mrs. Tapi's voice hitched. She was suddenly gasping for air. Dex and Daphna finally turned. Time sped up. The forest spun; everything blurred.

Something inhuman. A monstrosity. A bulging and bloated beast with wet, red skin, if the thing could be said to have skin at all, had Mrs. Tapi by the throat.

Neither Dex nor Daphna were sure they were seeing what they thought they were seeing—how could they be? Both were sure what they smelled though. A putrid odor was radiating from the thing. Daphna tried to turn away, but found it impossible. Dex began to gag. It was dark; it was raining again; they had to be hallucinating. Mrs. Tapi wasn't even struggling. She was limp. The thing let go of her, and she slumped to the forest floor.

Now it was coming toward them.

It was all too unreal. Neither twin moved. The thing was standing over them. Now it was keeling between them. Wet hands were pressing down on their throats. Then a voice, ruined, croaked, “It was the old man. Then it was that old lady, and now it's gonna be—”

That's when the screaming started. Words weren't discernible, only raw, primal screaming. Someone was running and screaming toward the Clearing. The thing let go of their throats. It scrambled along the ground. Then it ran.

Now there were sirens again, and the sounds of lots of people shouting among the trees. Colors blended and dripped.

Everything faded to black.

words

Dexter tried to open his eyes. With significant effort, he managed to open the left, but the right was swollen shut. His lip was puffed up and crusty and throbbing, and his limbs felt like dead weights. He was dry, though, lying in a bed wearing ugly green pajamas. Daphna was blinking at him from another bed, wearing the same thing.

“We're in the hospital,” she whispered. “You've been asleep for hours! The police were here. I was pretending to be asleep so I wouldn't have to say anything.
They're all
dead
, Dex.
All of them
. I've been looking down on them, on old people, for—forever, acting like I was some great person for taking pity on them. I feel like I woke up from the worst nightmare of all time.” Daphna blinked again, then began to sob.

“They were so good to me, so kind and caring,” she whimpered. “They're dead, Dex.
Dead
. Even if they were ready to go,
they're
dead
.”

“That thing,” Dex said. “It was—”

“Emmet. He finally got his wish.”

“But that fire—how could he have survived?”

“I don't know.”

“Is Dad here?”

“Yeah,” Daphna said. “He got hurt, Dex—really bad. Emmet did it! Dad fractured his hip and had to have surgery. And he got a concussion, too. I think he's been acting weird, mumbling strange stuff or something. I'm not sure ‘cause they went in the hall to talk about him. He's in a room somewhere with Latty now I guess. And Dex,
it was Latty
who found us
. She put Dad in an ambulance and went looking for us. She chased me all over the neighborhood!

“She found Evelyn at the R & R and they drove to the park. Dex, she saved our lives. Emmet was going to kill us for sure. Dex,” Daphna added, “I was so scared, I peed in my pants.”

Dexter nodded, but did not comment. “What about all that money?” he whispered.

Daphna shrugged. “I'm sure there's a—” she started to say, but just then, Latty came in.

At the sight of the twins awake, she broke into tears and rushed at them. But she stopped short of taking them into her arms. She backed up, weeping with relief. “Dex, Daphna!” she cried, “I'm—I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay,” Dex said, but with no irritation. “We're okay.”

“And you were right,” Daphna admitted. “You were right to be worried. You were right about Rash. In fact, you have no idea how right you were. I'd understand if you never let us out of the house again.”

“No,” Latty said, surprising the twins, “I've been wrong, absolutely wrong. Hearing that horrid name again sent me into an awful state thinking about your mother. But, kids, I should never have told you my promise to her. I shouldn't have burdened you with it. It was selfish and weak of me to try to manage you with guilt. I've been a smothering presence in your lives for far too long.”

The twins looked at each other.

“But,” said Dex, “if you weren't chasing after us, we'd be—”

“If I wasn't so controlling, you might not have felt the need to defy me.”

“It's okay, Latty,” Daphna said. “You're not
that
controlling. Okay, you are, but we know you love us—like we were your own kids.”

That Latty was touched deeply by this was obvious. Her very person seemed to light up.

“From now on things will be different,” she promised. “I give you my word on it. Deal?” she asked.

“Deal.”

Latty couldn't help herself. She swooped upon the beds and swept both twins into a wrenching hug. The twins gave one back.

When Latty finally let them go, they said, simultaneously, “Can we go see, Dad?”

“Of course!” Latty said. “But let me get the doctor first, and the police want to talk to you, too.”

Fortunately, everyone believed the twins had passed out after the first gunshot, and that they had no idea what was going on, that they'd just been in the wrong place at the wrong time when an old woman went off her rocker. And no one had gotten a close look at the figure who'd fled the scene. An investigation was underway.

Without arousing suspicion, Daphna managed to ask if there was any connection between what happened to them and the fire at the bookstore, and even slipped in a question about whether any books had been found in the Clearing. In both cases, the answer was no.

On the walk over to Milton's room, Latty explained that Evelyn Idun was arranging to have him transferred to the Home for rehabilitation. Neither Dex nor Daphna listened closely to the details. They stopped at a door.

“Can we—” Daphna started to say. “I mean, would you mind if we see Dad alone?”

“Of course not!” Latty said. “But wait—” The twins paused and looked at her expectantly.

“Your father will be asleep,” she said, “but he told me something in the car on the way over to that store. He's realized some things himself.”

“What?” the twins asked.

“He thinks he's botching his role as a father.”

The twins flashed each other a look. There was no animosity, only relief.

“He realized he's investing too much of himself in books and too little in you,” Latty explained. “He admitted to me that it's been his way of keeping your mother with him all these years. But after seeing how distant you two have grown during this last trip, he decided it's just not worth the price. He said he didn't even know why he felt compelled to stay away this summer—though he suspects it had something to do with not wanting your birthday to come, not wanting you to become young adults when he'd so long looked forward to celebrating the day with your mother here, too. That's why he didn't get any gifts, kids.”

BOOK: The Book of Nonsense
3.93Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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