The Boy Who Knew Me When (From Boys to men Trilogy) (7 page)

  Brea stared at me but I could not quite peg what her expression was. In a matter of seconds I read anger, frustration, indifference and awe. Nothing surprised me more than seeing the crooked smile that flashed across her lips. Suddenly she crossed the room and threw her arms around me.

“Did you just say I was a ten?” she bounced up and down excitedly like a ten year-old. “I knew there was a reason why we were best friends. I love you Jem. And you are right, time to snap. James shot me a text before that moron dumped me and invited me out to the Omega house for some kind of meet the pledge party. Let’s go, you can hang out with what’s his name, Ford, Julian, whatever, it’s perfect.”

  James was the guy who had beaten down Ford’s door in an effort to find me after an insane night of first, second and third orgasmic encounters of the most delicious kind. I did not even know Brea had spoken to the man again, but then, I have kind of been caught up on my own little world the last few days. 

“He isn’t going to be there, he went out of town for the weekend. Went to visit his grandmother in Puerto Rico”

“Really?” she asked confusedly. I nodded and she continued. “Strange, you would think the president of the fraternity would kind of have to be there.”

 
President? That was news to me. It seemed I really did need to get to know Ford because I had no idea that he was the president of the Omega Delta Phi fraternity. I guess that explains his larger than normal bedroom complete with private bath. Two rooms that I had gotten to know very well in only a few hours.

“Oh well, we can go anyway, it will be fun!” she decided.

 
The party didn’t start until later on in the evening so we decided to hit the mall, do some shopping and have a little fun. I was still broke needing most of the money Aunt Tilly forwarded into my checking account from my trust for bills. There was just enough left that I could hit the clearance rack at forever 21 and The Gap. I needed this little shopping excursion to keep my mind off of something that I could not have. Or shall I say
someone
I could not have, not at the moment anyway.

 
By the time we were done shopping Brea had racked up a few hundred dollars in shoes and I had managed a couple cute outfits, including a little black dress that I planned on wearing to dinner with Ford on Monday. It was strange calling him Ford knowing that he was Julian, no matter how many times I said it, I still saw him as my brother’s best friend. Several times I had to correct myself which is funny since I had not seen him since I was seven years old.

 
I could not tell you how many nights I fell asleep wondering how he was. I very much wanted him to be happy. I prayed every night for years, to a God that I was no longer sure existed, that he was safe and not hurting as much as I was. Deep down, no matter how much I prayed for him I knew there was no way he was any better off than me. Eventually it became easy to forget about him because I wanted to forget everything that preyed on the positive life I was trying to live, something I suddenly felt guilty about.

 
After my dad took my mom from this world I began to distance myself from anything and everything related to Nicolai. I was angry at the world but mostly my dad and Nicolai. I knew the things that happened were out of anyone’s control but I hated my father for being weak and I hated my brother for being a victim. As far as I was concerned my dad could have chosen to stay in the hospital which would have been best for everyone involved and my brother should have wanted to spend more time at with his real family.

 
My dad had wanted to go fishing with Nicolai that weekend. My mom on the other hand thought it would be a good experience for Nicolai to see the big Dallas museums and the place where John F. Kennedy was shot, which is pretty ironic all things considered.

 
After unsuccessfully trying to call Ford I pulled on my favorite pair of vintage Calvin Klein boot cut jeans and a red sequined tank that I bought at forever 21 a few hours before. After deciding to let my hair fall freely and pulling on my biker boots Brea and I made our way to the frat house. The party turned out to be more of a backyard barbecue with a few friends; it was nowhere near the size of the party a few nights before. I would say in total there were only about forty or so people including the frat boys and their pledges.

 
Several minutes after arriving Raz, the over enthusiastic pledge from the night before last with whom was the catalyst that reunited me with Julian, AKA Ford, handed Brea and I each a bottle of Corona.

“Don’t worry I didn’t drug ‘em or nothin’, we aren’t allowed to open the bottles, house rules.” I stared at him with my mouth gaped open. Should I have been worried?

“Ah crap, that was kind of a freaky thing to say huh?” He said taking notice of my stunned reaction.

“No, I can’t say it was the best way to start off a conversation. Though, I guess it’s good to know.” Brea laughed behind me; I am sure finding both of us amusing.

“Drugged or not, thanks for the booze, Raz!” Brea beamed enthusiastically.

“Of course! It’s my job though. I hand out the drinks, I have two minutes to arm newcomers with a drink and two minutes refill anyone else who needs it. Timothy behind me has to video tape everything for proof. Jacob...” He pauses and lifts his finger pointing at a boy I can only assume is Jacob who is hovering about 10 feet away his eyes scanning the crowd. “…over there is doing his job which is to make sure I am doing mine. If either of us screws up we each have to lose a piece of clothing. If we end up naked we end up having to cup each other’s balls in front of all these lovely ladies.”

   And that is when I notice that besides the members and pledges every one of the people here are women. Not just any women but gorgeous women of all shapes and sizes.

“Anyway, I need to scan the crowd; I have no intention of letting these losers grab my dick. You still owe me a dance Jemma and I plan on collecting!” he said walking away collecting empty bottles and replacing them with full ones.

“I see James, mind if I split and go say hello?” Brea asked. I shook my head no and told her to have a good time. I am a big girl; I can most definitely manage without her.

“Jem!” a perky voice cried out from behind me. I turned around and saw Angela walking up to me, wearing a six inch pair of rainbow wedges and a bright red strapless rainbow belted dress that showed off every inch of her tiny curvaceous figure.

“Angela!” We hugged and kissed each other on the cheek. “You are very colorful this evening.”

“I know right? I woke up in such a great mood this afternoon, I felt like a million bucks, only I was sad when I realized that I don’t have a million bucks and needed to find a pot of gold. Therefore....” She held the bottom of her dress out and spun around. “...I am a rainbow hoping she will find her pot of gold. “

 
We both giggled, stopping at the sound of my name in the back ground.

“Well got damn, I said GOT DAMN, is that Jemma Lee Hale I see?” I turned back to the party and lo and behold was Brandon’s best friend Axel.

“Axel, is that you?” He ran up to me, threw his arms around my waist, yee-hawed and lifted me up off the ground spinning me around. I laughed as he sat me back down on the ground.

“Well hell yeah it’s me. Brandon said I might see you around these parts. Rumor is around the house that you hooked up with our pres. Say it ain’t so Jemma?” He said clinging to his heart. “Tell me that after all this time I spent waiting in the wings you didn’t hook up with that jerk?”

“Jemma! You didn’t tell me you hooked up with Ford. Is it true?” Angela questioned.

“Well, sort of, I mean we kind of know each other from when we were kids. He’s a nice guy. And besides what the fuck business is it of yours who I hook up with?” I defended myself. It wasn’t anyone’s business what I or who did with my life.

“Now Jem, don’t get all pissy on me. I ain’t saying nothin’! I’m just tuggin’ your chain sweet pea. Ford’s a good guy.” Axel pleaded.

“Heck well I’m sure as hell saying something!” Angela grabbed me by the shoulders and spun me to face her. “Ford Ackles is a total man whore. I don’t think I have been to a single party in the last two years that he didn’t hook up with someone. The most pathetic part of it all is that he has a fiancée back home, the son of a bitch could care less.”

  Fiancée? I expect college guys to have a little fun but a fiancée? Not that I have any kind of claim on him but he never mentioned so much as a girlfriend, little alone a fiancée.

“In fact...” Angela continued. “She is supposed to be starting at St. Edward’s this year. Isn’t that right Ax?” She looked to Axel for confirmation.

“Like I said, I ain’t saying nothing. I ain’t risking my legacy status talking shit about other people’s business. Sorry Jemma, Ford’s a good guy. You might want to talk to him about it instead of listening to a bunch of hearsay anyway.”

 
I couldn’t quite wrap my head around anything the two of them were going on about. I felt so numb that I could not manage a single coherent thought until I registered the next few words out of Axel’s mouth.

“He should be along any minute now, I am sure he can explain his own life.”

“What do you mean any minute? Don’t you mean Sunday night?” OK, now I was pissed.

“No, he should be back from the airport with Heather any minute now. He went down to San Juan to take care of his grandmama and to bring Heather back.”

  I could feel the blood starting to boil in my body and I felt my face turning the color of crimson.

“WHAT THE FUCK?! ” I screamed catching the entire party by surprise but I didn’t care. “Who the hell is Heather? You better talk Axel Eugene Mosby or so help me God I am going to tell everyone about that time Jennifer Flowers left you with blue balls and you decided it would be a good idea to.......”

  Axel backed away from me a few feet and put his hands up in front of me as if trying to prevent me from kneeing him in the balls. Which I have to admit might make me feel a hell of a lot better. 

“WHOA
, WHOA WHOA” he loudly cautioned. “OK, don’t say another word. The last thing I need is for the guys to have that kind of ammunition to fire at me. Heather is Ford’s girl, from what I hear they have been going steady since junior year of high school, he proposed to her last Valentine’s day. All the guys participated in it, flowers, balloons, candles the whole shebang.”

 
I heard Angela utter an “Mm hmm” behind me. I could no longer control the tears I had been so desperately holding back.

“Oh shit” exclaimed Axel. I turned to follow in the direction his eyes were now pointing to find Ford hand in hand with a gorgeous raven haired beauty who I quickly figured out was Heather. 

  Almost as fast as I took notice of the couple Ford himself took notice of me. Our eyes locked and no matter how much I tried I could not look away from him. Each second we stared at one another caused my knees to grow weaker until finally they buckled and gave out. Luckily Axel was there to catch me, as soon as his arms pulled me back up again Ford was in front of me, leaving Heather standing alone in the doorway.

“Jemma” He reached out for my hand but I stepped away tripping over Axels size thirteen steel toed boot. Ford grabbed hold of both my arms and pulled me closer to him yanking me out of Axel’s grasp.

“That’ll be all, Axel.” He ordered.

“You gunna be alright Jemma?” Axel glared at me with a torn expression on his face. I knew he didn’t want to leave me alone with Ford but at the same time I knew he had no choice if he wanted to secure his spot for the next 4 years as a brother of one of the most prestigious fraternity’s on campus.

“I’m fine Axel; go do what you need to do.” I said never taking my eyes away from Ford. I felt Fords grip tighten around my arms, when I cried out in pain he let me go.

“Jemma I...”

“DON’T Ford!” I firmly barked. “Don’t say anything, you don’t need to. I get it, OK? It wasn’t as if we were dating, you are not my man or anything by any stretch of the word. We fucked, it was good, enough said, good luck on your engagement.” I said.

 
As I turned to walk away Ford grabbed both of my arms, pulled me around to face him then shoved his lips into mine. I gathered enough strength to push him off of me and slapped him with a force so hard he stumbled backward reaching his hand to rub the tender spot that was now reddened with my handprint.

 
My body started to shake and tremble, and then tiny noises I barely recognized as mine began to pour out of my mouth. The noises that started off as nothing but small whistles quickly turned into hysterical laughter. Before I knew it Axel and Brea were by my side. I heard Angela mumble something behind me that sounded kind of like “You son of a bitch!” as the two of them escorted me out of the party.

 
Axel drove Brea and me home, we had taken a Taxi just in case we had a few too many and since he was the designated driver for the evening he was able to excuse himself without incident. By the time we arrived back at the apartment the laughter had stopped and I had turned into more of a zombie than anything. My entire body had gone numb and there was pretty much not a single thought running through my head. It didn’t make any sense but I suddenly felt as if I had lost my entire family, Julian included, all over again. This must have been how Julian felt the night he saved me from Raz, after he realized who I was. It felt like I was drowning in all of the stagnant emotions of my past.