The Boys of Fire and Ash (11 page)

“My Abish isn't that great. A lot of it was just gibberish.”

I felt a hand hit my leg and saw Av reaching for me. I grabbed him and pulled him to his feet.

“Just stop talking, Blaze,” he sighed. “No more. Take us to the Temple. That's all you need to do.”

It was a silent hike through the Baublenotts after Av attacked Blaze. Silent and cold. I couldn't even look at Av, afraid he'd ask me for more answers, afraid I'd have to admit he was right. We couldn't trust Blaze. But for Cubby, what other choice did I have?

I stared at my palm again, and even in the darkness I could see something was wrong with the skin. My fingers were shriveled and splitting, and they shook as I tried to inspect them. My whole body shook; I was shaking all over and my limbs were starting to feel numb. I could feel the seal from the Sticky Willow losing its grip on my skin, the water washing away the stick. Every part of me was soaked; my skin felt cool and clammy to the touch. It was the Baublenotts. I could feel it draining my strength from my body. It didn't want me.

“You all right?” called Blaze.

Before I could answer him, my right foot sank unexpectedly and I lost my balance, falling into Fiver. He grabbed me by the arm, steadying me on my feet. I could hear the chatter of his teeth.

Beside me, Av was trembling too, hugging his arms tight to his naked chest, hunched over and breathing through his teeth. We were not all right.

It was like the Pit. It chose who to keep and who to kill. It chose to keep Rawley, keep my Brothers and me, and all others were intruders. But to the Baublenotts, we were the intruders.

“We'll stop,” said Blaze. “I'll find us someplace out of the water to warm up.”

I wanted to tell him no, but my mouth was shaking too much, and I had trouble getting the words out. “B-but,” I stammered, “we can't stop!”

“You've been in the water too long. The cold can kill you just like anything else, Urgle,” said Blaze. “What good will you be to your Brother dead?”

We marched a long way before Blaze was able to find a dry enough spot for us, and by then I could barely walk straight anymore. Any problem I had with stopping was long gone. I crawled out of water that was up to my waist and onto a slippery stone surface. The spot Blaze had picked was a large grouping of pink-speckled Baublenott rocks surrounded by drooping trees and thick brush. The stones were damp, but well above the water, and I immediately felt relieved to be standing in the open air.

Av and Fiver were standing close to me, the three of us watching as Blaze approached a giant pile of dark stone off to our right. The large stones were smothered in moss and vines, and Blaze set to work picking off chunks and collecting them in his arms.

“Toss me that knife,” he ordered. Av made no move to do it, hugging himself and glaring as his teeth clattered together.

Blaze didn't seem to care much, and marched up to Av,
pulling the dagger out of the waistband of his Larmy skin. Av said nothing, but their eyes met for the briefest moment, and if Av hadn't been so cold, I worried he would have attacked Blaze again.

Blaze undid his outermost skin, a heavy, dark hide with sleeves. He handed it to me.

His bare arms were thicker than my legs.

The hide was way too big for me and I held out my arm for Av to come closer. He jerked away, refusing to touch anything that came from Blaze.

Blaze didn't notice—he was heading for the surrounding droopy trees.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“You need to warm up,” he said. “I'm starting a fire.”

“Everything's soaked,” said Fiver.

“Yeah, everything is.” Blaze was at the edge of the stone floor, touching the sides of one of the droopy trees. Apparently dissatisfied, he moved to the next. “Pay attention: these are Bauble Weepers,” he said, digging his knife into the dark black bark of the tree. “Lots of layers to the bark.” A piece of the bark peeled off with the knife like dead skin, and Blaze ripped it away with his hand, throwing it into a nearby pool. “Peel away enough,” he said, “you'll hit the dry stuff.”

With a grunt he pulled away more bark, discarding what he didn't want. After a couple more pulls he got to the bark he wanted to keep. It was white and thin.

“Come sit down,” he said, making his way back to the moss-covered stones. None of us moved at first. I still didn't trust him, none of us did, but the promise of fire when everything was so wet was too tempting, and I joined him on the ground.

Blaze lay his Bauble Weeper bark down and picked up his moss, squeezing a large bunch of it between his hands. I watched him work, though I thought it was a wasted effort when I saw the water dripping out of the moss.

Blaze reached behind him and pulled out a bladder bag from his belt. He reached in and took out a chunk of rock.

He ran Av's knife along the edge and a spark flew.

“What is that?” I asked him. I already knew what it was.

“Flint,” Blaze said, focused on his work.

Flint. He kept it in a bladder skin. I remembered Cubby's little fingers, reaching out for the smooth green trinket dangling from Blaze's belt. He said it was a flint box. If his flint was here, what had he done with the box?

I glanced over at Av, but he hadn't heard it, too focused on the strange tinder Blaze had collected. Fiver was picking at the bark. After a few sparks the fire was well on its way. Av and Fiver sat with their noses practically roasting on the flames, obsessively studying every piece of juicy Baublenott that had gone into creating it. No Brother could make fire when it was wet; there had never been a reason to. The Pit was so dry no one could believe a fire would start around so much water. I could just imagine the looks of amazement on the faces of the Hunting Party when Av and Fiver showed them they could do it.

The heat immediately went to work, breathing life back into my limbs and drying my cool, damp skin. But still, my insides felt cold, my gut sloshing with a chilly feeling that Blaze was hiding more from us.

As the rest of me tried to warm up, there was a burning in my thigh. With the light of the flames I could see that my Tunrar wound was half open. Black bits of Baublenott filth clumped inside the flesh and my nose wrinkled.

“You need to tie that up,” said Blaze, nodding at my leg. He undid his belt and held it out to me.

I waited, wondering if he knew I'd noticed it was missing his flint box.

“Go on,” he said.

I took the belt, and his focus went back to the flames. He didn't know.

I pulled the belt as tight as I could, and the sting forced a hiss from behind my teeth. At least it was covered now.

The fire popped and cracked, dulling the creature sounds of the Baublenotts. Staring directly into the flames, I could almost trick myself into believing I was in the A-Frame.

“We should build one for Digger,” Av said, his eyes glowing in the firelight. “Send him off to Rawley proper.”

I shivered and rubbed my arms. Av was right. We'd just left him, with no way for Rawley to find his fire. The Brothers say there's a fire, a flame that belongs to the Pit, burning inside each of us. When Cole died, we all took him outside and laid his body on the ground. Crow lifted his head back gently and opened his mouth wide, so Rawley could see his flame, so Rawley could find him and take care of him. That's how it is for all Brothers. Except for Digger. We'd left him, not making sure Rawley could see his flame.

Av was on his feet, and headed for the Bauble Weeper Blaze had stripped. Fiver sighed and stood up to help.

Blaze began pulling at the moss behind him, gathering it up for Av, when Av hurled a stick that connected with Blaze's hand.

“Don't!” he snapped. “His
real
Brothers will do it.”

Blaze gritted his teeth, massaging his hand where the
stick had struck it. I watched Av and Fiver in the darkness, their backs to me and Blaze alone by the fire.

I held out my hand to him. “We'll need Av's knife.”

Blaze tossed it to me, focused on the damage to his hand.

“And your flint.”

He slapped it down in my palm and leaned his head back against the dark moss-covered stones.

I lowered my voice. “What happened to your flint box, Blaze?”

He stayed leaning against the stone, but I could see him tense, see his jaw lock. His eyes shifted over to me. “I lost it, I guess.”

I stared at him, daring him to make me believe that.

“Probably when your friend jumped me,” he said.

I kept on staring and he stared right back. He didn't have the flint box when Av attacked him. He didn't have it in Abish Village, even. He was lying.

He sat up, waiting for me to ask more, his eyes locked onto mine.

“Urgle.” It was Av. I looked up and he and Fiver stood in front of me with arms full of Bauble Weeper. “Are you coming?”

“Yeah,” I said, and Av and Fiver made their way across the rocks to find a spot to say goodbye to Digger. I took off Blaze's heavy hide and handed it to him with one last narrowed glare. This conversation wasn't over, and I wanted to make sure he knew that.

“Take some of the moss,” Blaze said. “Squeeze it out, it'll make a proper flame.”

I knew Av wouldn't want me to, not if it was Blaze's idea. But he'd used it on his fire and it was crackling and glowing nicely. We needed a nice flame for Digger.

Without acknowledging Blaze, I pulled away enough moss from the stones at his back to fill my arms, and left him to sit alone by the fire.

I could see Av and Fiver, shadows in the dark, setting up far from Blaze. As I walked over, I could feel the weight of the flint and Av's dagger in my hand. Poor Fingers. The dagger I'd made him would never find its way to his Big Brother's hand now. I'd have to give it to him when we got home.

And then I'd finish Cubby's.

I handed the flint to Av, and after a few unsuccessful attempts Digger's fire lit up our faces and burned warm and bright.

“Think Rawley will find him?” asked Fiver.

Av didn't say anything, just wiped at his face with the back of his wrist and I could see his eyes were wet. I hoped so. The thought of Digger alone in the Baublenotts made my throat start to swell, and I swallowed hard. But that was Rawley's job. He came for all of us, took care of all of us when the time came. He'd find Digger. The fire was bright, the flames were big. He'd come.

“When it was Wasted—” Fiver stopped short and cleared his throat, pretending to hack something up, then spat at his feet. “When it was Wasted, Crow told me I should, ah—” He stopped again, kicking the spot where his spit had landed. His chin was pressed to his chest, but even still I could see it quivering. I felt a sudden sting in the pit of my stomach. Fiver had done this before, for Wasted, his Little Brother. And none of us had been there with him.

Fiver let out a breath and looked to me. “He told me I should say something to Rawley. Ask him to come, and
that I should”—he shrugged—“I should tell him the kind of things Wasted liked, so he'd know.”

By the fire, I could see flames reflected in his glossy eyes, and my own started feeling hot, knowing it could have just as easily been me who spoke to Rawley.

Av shifted on his feet and let his hands fall behind his back as he stared into the flames. “Rawley,” he started, his voice heavy and dry, “this flame is for our Brother, Digger. Digger really likes setting snares; he was always very good at it. He had a Little Brother named Fingers.” Av stopped and wiped at his eyes again. “But he looked after everyone. Sort of tried to be a Big Brother to us all, I guess.”

I'd never thought of it like that, but Av was right. He'd bossed us around, but really he was just trying to take care of us all.

I looked up into the sky—wisps of silver-lined clouds drifted in a black sea of stars—and I wondered if that was how Rawley would find our Brother, if he'd ride it to Digger's lonely spot in the Baublenotts and take him away. And Cubby. He was alone in the dark somewhere. Would Rawley watch over him? I squeezed my eyes tight and swallowed again. I made a silent wish to Rawley, begged him not to come for Cubby. Not now. It would be me who came. It had to be me.

When the flames had finally dwindled on Digger's fire and the embers were cooling, the smell of roasting meat drifted lightly on the breeze. My stomach growled and I looked over to Blaze's fire. The flames were still high, and they were licking at something Blaze was roasting over it.

“We'll be at the Temple in the morning. You should eat something,” he called out to us. “Come have some Marmos.”

I didn't know what Marmos was, or where he'd got it from, but the smell was enough to tell me I'd like it, and I started to make my way over. Fiver was already ahead of me.

Av didn't follow. I turned back to see him, his arms crossed and trembling in front of Digger's dying embers.

“You should eat, Av.”

“I can hunt for myself,” he said. “I don't need
him
to take care of me.”

If anyone knew Av didn't need someone to take care of him, it was me. But he hadn't eaten anything but a nibble of the Abish cake. He had to be just as hungry as I was. And the cold was seeping in again. I could hear his teeth starting to rattle together.

“At least come warm up,” I tried. “We'll have to get going soon. You might as well be dry.”

He bounced on his knees and stared at the cinders, deciding whether or not to listen to me. I could tell he didn't want to. We'd all been shocked by Digger's death, but it was weighing on Av the most. Digger was Av's Brother, my Brother. Digger was one of us. It was the “us” part that Av was always reminding me about. It was what we were, what we had. We were Brothers. And Blaze took Digger away from us. How could I ask Av to trust him?

“You're right,” I told him. “About Blaze, I mean.”