The Brookfield Series Volume One (11 page)

“I’ve thought of that, but it takes time, and I don’t have time. In five months, my bills are going to double. Diapers, formula, clothes. I’m making good money now. How can I give it all up to start something like you suggested and have the money for that?”

“I can help.”

“Mark, this is my baby,” she said softly.

“I know.” Where was she going with this?

“I don’t know if you do. I’m not Annabelle.”

His eyes widened. “You think I don’t know that?” His anger was rising again. “I’m not playing house with you because I want what I lost. I want you, Julie. I’m in love with you. I told you, I married Annabelle because she was pregnant. I never felt what I do for you with her. And it hurts me to say that. But I love you, Julie.”

The tears started again, and he wanted to hold her. Go to her and wrap her up in his arms.

“This is just too much for me.” She stood and started to walk away. “I need some time.”

She went into her mom’s room and shut the door, leaving him standing alone. He’d confessed his love, and he wanted to hear she loved him, too. But instead she’d walked away. There was no point in gazing at a shut door. He’d return to work.

When he got home that evening, she was still shut away in her bedroom.

* * *

The next morning, Julie hid out in her room until she heard Mark leave. She couldn’t see him. If she did, then she wouldn’t go through with this. She would stay here and probably live happily ever after with him, which sounded wonderful, but she really needed to do this herself. She had always depended on someone, and it was time for her to stop.

There was no plan. She had no idea where she would go when she got back to New York. She supposed she could stay in a local hotel for the time being. A few of them actually rented for the week, and it might even come out cheaper for now.

Julie had money saved, so she could take some time in finding her new home. It had to be perfect. She didn’t want some small, cramped loft apartment. Maybe Jeremy didn’t mean what he’d said about signing away his rights. Not getting child support would make this much more difficult.

Creeping to the bedroom door now, she listened. It had been quiet for a while, so it was most likely safe to assume he was gone. She pulled her suitcase behind her and left it in the living room. In the kitchen, she found a plate of fresh fruit on the counter with a note next to it.

Julie,

I’m sorry if I overstepped. I just couldn’t bear to let him talk to you that way. I’ll see you at lunch.

Mark

This man was making this so difficult, but she had to remind herself it was for the best. She ripped a piece of paper from the bottom of his note and scribbled across it that she would miss him.

She ate the fruit, cleaned up her mess, and took a look around the house once more. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her suitcase and walked out the door, making sure to lock it. She sat in her car a moment as it warmed up and wondered if she was doing the right thing. Hoping she was, she took the drive back through Brookfield.

She took in all the buildings again as she drove down Main Street. The shops were all just opening. People were re-salting the pathways from whatever had melted and froze last night. A tear trickled down her cheek as she passed the sign bidding her farewell.

Thanks for visiting Brookfield, Wyoming. We hope you enjoyed your visit.

Chapter T
welve

One month later.

Julie sat in her hotel room, anxiously awaiting the arrival of her mother. The past month had been long and miserable. She missed Mark more than she’d imagined she would. She hadn’t known how hard it was going to be to juggle work and life. She was now sporting a pregnant belly and peeing all the time, and there was still more growing.

Work was stressing her out. Demand after demand, and she wondered how she was going to do this once the baby came. They had agreed she could Skype with clients after the baby, but they wanted her to stay in New York. Where else was she going to go? She had burned all bridges that lead to Brookfield when she’d run from the one person who would’ve done anything for her.

Claire had called several times. Mark had been angry, she said, but now he was spending a lot of time with Cara. It hurt, and Julie was jealous. But she was the one who gave him up. Claire told her to come back. She said Mark loved her and would forgive her. Julie highly doubted it. Could someone get over what she’d done?

There was a light knock on the door, and Julie got excited. Finally, her mom was here. She would know just what to say.

Throwing the door open, she grabbed her mom tightly for a hug.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Julie said.

“Same here. Why don’t you let me go and let me in?” Margret said.

She released her mom and led her inside.

“This is where you’re staying?” Her mom looked around the room.

Julie sat down on the bed. “For now.”

“Well, you need to get settled somewhere, so you can start preparing for my granddaughter.”

Julie rubbed her belly and smiled. She was planning on naming her Lila. She finally quit calling her apple when she realized Lila was the perfect name.

“I know. This is harder than I thought it would be. And she’s going to be here before I know it. I don’t really know what to do. Especially since Jeremy is completely out of the picture.”

“What about Brookfield? Have you thought about it at all?”

“I have, yes. But what about work?”

“Worry about that later. It’ll all work out somehow.”

“I don’t think I can go back. I hurt Mark.”

Margret laughed. “You’re as stubborn as your father. If you want something, then you just need to go after it.”

“But did he want me, or did he want what he lost? I still haven’t figured that out.”

“That I can’t tell you, honey. That’s between you and him. Maybe you should call him. It isn’t like you don’t know the number. Instead of worrying your pretty little head about it, talk to him. You have to communicate. It’s important.”

“I heard he’s seeing Cara.”

Her mother shook her head. “Nonsense. He’s just passing the time. I don’t think they are made for one another.”

Julie let out a sigh. “Mom, I don’t even know where to begin to make things better. My life is so messy. It’s nowhere near settled like I had hoped it would be before Lila got here. I’m just glad to finally have you here.”

Margret hugged her. “Follow your heart. If you don’t try, you’ll always live with regret. And I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you felt you needed me most. I really thought you were just home for a surprise visit. And then when I learned of the blizzard, I had a real chuckle. When I met Mark, I thought he was perfect for you. I had hoped you two would get to know one another. I hope you know though that if I’d known how much you really needed me, I would’ve been there in a heartbeat.”

“I know, Mom.”

As her mother held her, Julie felt the comfort she had been longing for. Mom could always make it better. It was up to her now to figure out the rest of it.

* * *

Her mother’s visit went by too fast. In only a few hours, she would be taking her to the airport for her flight. Julie had to insist on driving her instead of catching a cab and paying the fare. Her crazy mom had wanted to feel like a real New Yorker, waving down the cabs. This was something Julie hated and really wished the city was a place that was more convenient for driving.

They currently were sitting in a small bistro-style restaurant Julie loved and knew her mother would, too. The food wasn’t quite as expensive here, which made her feel better since her mother was insisting on paying.

After ordering, her mom took her hand and held it a moment. “I have an offer for you.”

“What?”

“If you want the house in Brookfield, it’s yours.”

“I couldn’t possibly.” She shook her head.

“It’s too big for just me. I like traveling. I think I want to stay south in the winter. I’m over all the snow. I want to be sitting by a pool in Miami on Christmas.”

Julie chuckled. “I highly doubt they do that there, Mom.”

“You never know. Either way, that’s what I want. I’d like to come home in the summer, but I want something small. That house has gotten to be too much for me. And it would be perfect for you and Lila.”

“What about Mark?”

“He’s welcome, too.”

Julie rolled her eyes. “I meant, if he doesn’t want to be with me, where will he go? He lives there.”

“He does. But he’s renting. By now, he should be established enough to get his own place if he’s that stupid to not be with you.”

Julie wanted to argue with her, but what good would it do? Her mom believed in true love and happy endings. Julie wasn’t so sure she did. With the way things were right now, she was sure there was some sort of curse over her head. A dark raincloud waiting to pour buckets of water on her.

She thanked her mom and said she’d think about it. The first thing to think about was what in the world she would possibly do there.

After dinner, they headed to the airport. Due to securities, Julie had to say goodbye to her mother right after she checked her baggage. She hugged her tightly and told her they would talk soon. Margret promised to visit when Lila came and stay with her a few weeks until she was ready to be on her own. Julie was thrilled. She knew it wasn’t going to be easy. She’d never even owned a pet. Maybe she should get a fish to start with?

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Julie’s belly grew larger, and her energy levels tanked. She was nearing seven months and wondered where people got their information for these baby books. They all said she should be glowing and bursting with energy, but it took everything in her to make it through one day and drag herself off the elevator at night.

She still had not found a place, and she was beginning to think it was a sign. Her hotel room was getting way too cramped between her stuff and the baby’s. She was supposed to be setting up for a nursery in the seventh month, according to the books. She couldn’t have a baby and keep living in this damn hotel room.

Julie was seriously lost. Things just weren’t right, and she somehow needed to turn it around.

The last few nights, she had researched e-publishing houses. It was a lot easier than she’d thought it was to get one going. It was actually beginning to look like an option she might take. If she went back to Brookfield, she wouldn’t have rent at the house. She could have enough space for her and Lila and, with what money she had saved, she could probably survive on it a little while.

Her phone beeped with an incoming e-mail. She really didn’t want to look. The current author she was working with was a nightmare. She questioned every note and change. This author was already a best-seller. She should have been used to this. Perhaps that was why she’d wanted a new editor. The last one had gone bat-shit crazy from her.

Once she made the decision she was leaving New York and heading back to Brookfield, Wyoming, she knew she should let Jeremy know. While he wanted nothing to do with them, it seemed like the right thing to do.

Opening her laptop, she composed a quick e-mail.

Jeremy,

I hope you’re well. I really do. I’m leaving New York and returning to my hometown to raise this child. I don’t feel like the city is the right place. I know you want nothing to do with us, and that is fine.

Take care,

Julie

Over the next week, Julie took care of all loose ends. She never heard back from Jeremy, but she didn’t expect anything different.

She sat on the white bedspread in her hotel room and hoped the next time she entered this room she would be bringing all her stuff home. She was hopefully, finally, finding her home.

She was able to fit everything she needed in a medium suitcase. There wasn’t much since she only a few clothes. Her idea to just buy bigger had worked until her belly actually turned into a basketball. Maternity pants with the big elastic waists and cotton bands were the most comfortable things she had ever put on. They hugged and supported her ever-growing belly just right.

Once the bag was packed, she called the front office and alerted them she was heading out of town. They wished her trip to be safe and well. She couldn’t agree more. As she wheeled her bag toward the hotel garage, she hoped this would work out the way she’d dreamed. And yes, Mark was part of her plan.

Chapter Thirteen

“I do think this is the right decision,” Julie said into her Bluetooth.

“I am so excited. It’s going to be so nice to have you home,” Claire said.