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Epistle to Dr. Blacklock

First printed in Currie, 1800.

Wow, but your letter made me vauntie!
proud

And are ye hale, and weel, and cantie?
well, cheerful

I kend it still, your wee bit jauntie
knew, small journey

       Wad bring ye to:
would

5
Lord send you ay as weel's I want ye,
always, well as

       And then ye'll do. —

The
Ill-thief
blaw the
Heron
south!
1
devil

And never drink be near his drouth!
thirst

He tauld mysel, by word o' mouth,
told

10
       He'd tak my letter;

I lippen'd to the chiel in trouth,
trusted, man

       And bade nae better. —
no

But aiblins honest Master Heron
maybe

Had at the time some dainty
Fair One
,

15
To ware his theologic care on,

       And holy study:

And, tired o'
Sauls
to waste his lear on,
souls, learning

       E'en tried the
Body
. —

But what d'ye think, my trusty Fier,
friend

20
I'm turned a Gauger — Peace be here!
exciseman

Parnassian
Quines
, I fear, I fear,
females [Muses]

       Ye'll now disdain me,

And then my fifty pounds a year

       Will little gain me. —

25
Ye glaiket, gleesome, dainty Damies,
silly, giddy

Wha by Castalia's wimplin streamies
who, meandering

Lowp, sing, and lave your pretty limbies,
leap, bathe

       Ye ken, ye ken,
know

That Strang necessity supreme is
strong

30
       'Mang sons o' Men. —

I hae a wife and twa wee laddies,
have, two small

They maun hae brose and brats o' duddies;
must have food & clothes

Ye ken yoursels my heart right proud is,
know

       I need na vaunt;
not boast

35
But I'll sned besoms and thraw saugh woodies,
cut, twist willow withies

       Before they want. —

Lord help me thro' this warld o' care!

I'm weary sick o't late and air!
early

Not but I hae a richer share
have

40
       Than mony ithers;
many others

But why should ae man better fare,
one

       And a' Men brithers!
brothers

Come,
Firm Resolve
take thou the van,

Thou stalk o' carl-hemp in man!
strength

45
And let us mind, faint heart ne'er wan
remember, won

       A lady fair:

Wha does the utmost that he can,
who

       Will whyles do mair. —
often, more

But to conclude my silly rhyme,

50
(I'm scant o' verse and scant o' time,)
short

To make a happy fireside clime

       To weans and wife,
children

That's the true
Pathos
and
Sublime

       Of Human life. —

55
My Compliments to Sister Beckie;

And eke the same to honest Lucky,

I wat she is a daintie Chuckie
bet, hen

       As e'er tread clay!

And gratefully my gude auld Cockie,
good old cockerel

60
       I'm yours for ay. —
always

Robert Burns, Ellisland, 21st Oct., 1789.

This was the poet's reply to a letter epistle from the Rev. Dr Thomas Blacklock (1721–91), dated from Edinburgh, 24th August, 1789. Blacklock was born at Annan, the son of English parents. He was blinded as a child by smallpox. He graduated as a divinity student in Edinburgh. In practising religion in Kirkcudbright, parishioners found his blindness a problem. He moved back to
Edinburgh in 1765 and set up a boarding school. He eventually printed his own volume of poetry, contributing songs to the Scots Musical Museum. Blacklock, by this time virtually a cult figure, contacted Burns after reading his Kilmarnock edition and suggested a larger edition to be printed in Edinburgh, which, according to the poet ‘overthrew all my schemes by rousing my poetic ambition' (Letter 125). If Blacklock helped persuade Burns not to emigrate, he played a part in Scottish literature. Blacklock, who knew Dr Johnson, John Home and David Hume, was a minor Literati figure.

The second stanza was indeed prophetic, describing as it does, Robert Heron as ‘The
Ill-thief
' or devil. The letter given by Burns to Robert Heron to pass on to Dr Blacklock never reached Blacklock (see Introduction).

1
Robert Heron was born in 1764 at New Galloway, the son of a weaver. He attended the University of Edinburgh after working as an assistant to Hugh Blair and was a prolific literary hack.

Written under the Portrait of Miss Burns

First printed in Duncan, Glasgow, 1801.

Cease, ye
prudes
, your envious railing,

Lovely Burns has charms —
confess
;

True it is, she had one failing,

Had ae woman ever less?

Miss Margaret Burns was an Edinburgh prostitute who came originally from Durham, the daughter of a merchant. With a friend she set up a brothel in Rose Street, near to Lord Stonefield's home. It is reputed that the daughters of the Lord took action against her and she was banished from Edinburgh. An appeal at the Court of Session on 12th December, 1789 went in her favour and she was allowed to stay in Edinburgh. She died in 1792. Burns appears to have known her given his remarks to Peter Hill on 2nd February, 1790, ‘… how is the fate of my poor Namesake, Mademoiselle Burns, decided?' (Letter 387). He goes on in the letter to condemn the hypocrisy of judges who, as he asserts, have, for over 6000 years, taken advantage of such female frailty: ‘shall the unfortunate sacrifice to thy pleasures have no claim on thy humanity!' Edinburgh prostitutes were ‘advertised' in an annual pocketbook printed exclusively for ‘gentlemen', which gave descriptions of each woman, not least their dental state, and where they were to be picked up.

Green Sleeves

or
My Fiddle and I

First printed in Barke, 1955.

Green sleeves and tartan ties

Mark my truelove where she lies;

I'll be at her or she rise,

       My fiddle and I thegither. —
together

Be it by the chrystal burn,

Be it by the milk-white thorn,

I shall rouse her in the morn,

       My fiddle and I thegither. —

This is the poet's modification of the Elizabethan
Greensleeves
, the song of the inconstant female lover. The melody was still popular in the eighteenth century. Fiddling is employed as an obvious sexual metaphor in this erotic lyric. Professor De Lancey Ferguson believes this song is traditional and was merely copied by Burns. Kinsley disagrees (Vol. III, pp. 1324–5). Although there are two manuscript copies, there is no definite proof either way.

To a Gentleman

Who Had Sent a Newspaper and Offered to Continue it Free of Expense

First printed in Currie, 1800.

KIND SIR, I've read your paper through,

And faith, to me 'twas really new!

How guessed ye, Sir, what maist I wanted?
most

This mony a day I've grain'd and gaunted,
groaned, gaped

5
To ken what French mischief was brewin;
know

Or what the drumlie Dutch were doin;
muddled

That vile doup-skelper, Emperor Joseph,
1
bum-smacker

If Venus yet had got his nose off;
given him v.d.

Or how the collieshangie works
dogfight

10
Atween the Russians and the Turks;

Or if the Swede, before he halt,
2

Would play anither Charles the twalt:
3
another, twelfth

If Denmark, any body spak o't;
spoke of it

Or Poland, wha had now the tack o't;
who, lease of it

15
How cut-throat Prussian blades were hingin;

How libbet Italy was singin;
castrated

If Spaniard, Portuguese, or Swiss,

Were sayin or takin aught amiss:

Or how our merry lads at hame,
home

20
In Britain's court kept up the game:

How royal George, the Lord leuk o'er him!
look

Was managing St. Stephen's quorum;
parliament

If sleekit Chatham Will was livin,
4
sly

Or glaikit Charlie got his nieve in;
5
silly, fist

25
How Daddie Burke the plea was cookin,
6

If Warren Hastings' neck was yeukin;
7
itching

How cesses, stents, and fees were rax'd,
rates, taxes, raised

Or if bare arses yet were tax'd;

The news o' princes, dukes, and earls,

30
Pimps, sharpers, bawds, and opera-girls;

If that daft buckie, Geordie Wales,
8

Was threshin still at hizzies' tails,
hussies'

Or if he was grown oughtlins douser,
any more sedate

And no a perfect kintra cooser,
country stallion

35
A' this and mair I never heard of;
more

And but for you I might despair'd of.

So gratefu', back your news I send you,

And pray a' guid things may attend you!

Ellisland, Monday Morning

By virtue of Professor Werkmeister's scholarship, this poem gives us entry not only into some of Burns's particular difficulties with Peter Stuart, but with the often ugly publishing world where creative writers interacted with the press. In 1838 an article in
The Gentleman's Magazine
attacked Peter Stuart for ‘riding in his carriage' while ‘Coleridge, who had made his fortune, was starving in Mr Gillman's garret'. Werkmeister goes on, ‘Daniel undertook to defend his brother against attempting the charge of a similar ex-ploitation of Burns'. Daniel wrote:

My elder brother Peter, who started…
The Star
[in 1788] had written to Burns, offering him terms for communications to the paper, a small salary, quite as large as his Excise-office emoluments. I forget particulars, but I remember my brother shewing Burns's letters, and boasting of the correpondence with so great a genius. Burns refused an engagement. And if, as I believe, the ‘Poem Written to a Gentleman who Had Sent Him a Newspaper, And Offered to Continue it Free of Expense' was written in reply to my brother, it was a sneering unhandsome return, though Dr Currie says fifty-two guineas per annum for a communication once a week was an offer ‘for which the pride of genius disdained to accept'. We hear much of purse-proud insolence… In 1795, my brother Peter purchased the copyright of the Oracle newspaper… Then it was my brother again offered Burns an engagement, as appears by the account of Burns's Life, which was again declined… (Quoted in Werkmeister's
Robert Burns and the London News
papers,
pp. 483–4,
Bulletin of the New York Public Library
, Vol. 65, 1961).

Given the irretrievably missing correspondence from Burns to Peter Stuart, we will never know the full truth about Daniel Stuart's claims. Given, however, the dangerously mendacious manner in which Peter Stuart distorted
Ode on the Departed Regency-Bill
and the way he publicly revealed Burns as the author of all of the pseudonymous verses he sent to Stuart (See
Ode, Sacred To The
Memory of Mrs. Oswald Of Auchencruive
), one cannot count on either of the brothers' veracity.

The appearance of the popular newspaper and the accelerated hourly communication of events horrified Wordsworth as much as it energised Burns. This poem's newspaper flow of highly salacious European and British political gossip regarding ‘sexually' degenerate power politics runs for a full stopless, breathless thirty-eight lines of
wonderfully reductive Scottish vernacular speech. This type of concentrated narrative also features in
A New Song, A Wet Day at Walmer
Castle
. It is possible that ‘DaddieBurke' (l. 25) is a misprint for ‘Paddy Burke'. The latter nickname is used by Burns in
The Dagger
.

1
Emperor Joseph II, died 20th February, 1790.

2
Gustavus III, 1746–92.

3
Charles XII, 1697–1718.

4
William Pitt, Earl of Chatham.

5
Charles James Fox, Whig leader.

6
Edmund Burke.

7
Warren Hastings, whose trial for Impeachment ran from 1788–95.

8
The Prince of Wales, whose reputation as a womaniser was public knowledge.

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