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Authors: Robert Burns

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190
A vast, unbottom'd, boundless
Pit
,

        Fill'd fou o'
lowan brunstane
,
full, flaming brimstone

Whase ragin flame, an' scorchin heat,
whose

        Wad melt the hardest whun-stane!
would, whinstone

The
half-asleep
start up wi' fear,

195
        An' think they hear it roaran;
roaring

When presently it does appear,

        'Twas but some neebor
snoran
neighbour, snoring

                Asleep that day.

'Twad be owre lang a tale to tell,
over long

200
        How monie stories past;
many

An' how they crouded to the yill,
crowded, ale

        When they were a' dismist;

How drink gaed round, in cogs an' caups,
went, wooden jugs, cups

        Amang the furms an' benches;
among, a row of seats

205
An'
cheese
an'
bread
, frae women's laps,
from

        Was dealt about in lunches,

                An' dawds that day.
large pieces

In comes a gausie, gash
Guidwife
,
jolly, smart, good-

        An' sits down by the fire,

210
Syne draws her
kebbuck
an' her knife;
then, cheese

        The lasses they are shyer:

The auld
Guidmen
, about the
grace
,
old, good-

        Frae side to side they bother;
from

Till some ane by his bonnet lays,
one, cap

215
        An' gies them't, like a
tether
,
gives, rope

                Fu' lang that day.
long

Waesucks! for him that gets nae lass,
Alas!, no

        Or lasses that hae naething!
have nothing

Sma' need has he to say a grace,

220
        Or melvie his braw claithing!
dirty with meal, fine clothes

O
Wives
, be mindfu', ance yoursel,
once

        How bonie lads ye wanted;
handsome

An' dinna for a
kebbuck-heel
do not, hard cheeese rind

        Let lasses be affronted

225
                On sic a day!
such

Now
Clinkumbell
,
3
wi' rattlan tow,
noisy pull

        Begins to jow an' croon;
swing, toll

Some swagger hame the best they dow,
home, can

        Some wait the afternoon.

230
At slaps the billies halt a blink,
a dyke gap, young lads

        Till lasses strip their shoon:
take off, shoes

Wi'
faith
an'
hope
, an'
love
an'
drink
,

        They're a' in famous tune

                For crack that day.
talk

235
How monie hearts this day converts
many

        O' Sinners and o' Lasses!

Their hearts o' stane, gin night, are gane
stone, come, gone

        As saft as onie flesh is:
soft, any

There's some are fou o'
love divine
;
full

240
        There's some are fou o'
brandy
;
full

An' monie jobs that day begin,
many

        May end in
Houghmagandie
sexual intercourse

                Some ither day.
other

This celebration of the sensual capacity of the Scottish people to resist the worst rhetorical excesses of their clerical masters was written in 1785 and revised in early 1786 for the Kilmarnock edition. As McGuirk notes it is a direct descendent of Fergusson's
Leith
Races
which itself descends from Milton's
L'Allegro
and the nine-line Scottish medieval ‘brawl' poem:

I dwall amang the caller springs

     That weet the Land o' Cakes,

And aften tune my canty strings

     At bridals and late-wakes.

They ca' me Mirth; I ne'er was kend

     To grumble or look sour,

But blyth was be to lift a lend,

     Gif ye was sey my pow'r

                  An' pith this day.

Fergusson's poem is, of course, the celebration of a purely secular occasion; Burns is writing a more complex religious satire. Crawford (
Burns,
A Study of the Poems and Songs
, p. 69) places the occasional poem accurately in the long Covenanter-originated Scottish tradition of open-air preaching. This specific event held in Mauchline in 1785 gathered together an audience of 2000 (four times the Mauchline population) of whom 1200 were communicants. Gilbert recorded that his brother was witness to this and had personal knowledge of the preachers he so incisively satirises.

Burns takes his epigraph from
Hypocrisy A-La-Mode
, a play written in 1704 by Tom Brown. That gale of liberal, satirical, enlightened laughter that runs through eighteenth-century English literature, especially Henry Fielding, as it attempts to sweep away institutionalised religious hypocrisy also blows powerfully through Burns's writings. He is the major Scottish variant on this anti-clerical Enlightenment project. His Scotland, however, was a darker, more theocratically-controlled state than almost anywhere else in Europe. In his early writing, as here, he senses victory over the savage forces of religious repression. Later, his mood was to darken as he despaired of the unbreakable grip Calvin's damnation had on the Scottish psyche and, hence, body politic.

This early poem has, however, the comic optimism of Fielding's
Tom Jones
rather than the demonic repression of Blake's
The Songs
of Experience
. The roaring flames of hell here (ll. 190–8) are merely the snores of a fellow pew-member. Unlike Macbeth, who tragically meets three witches on the moor, our comic narrator meets only two, Superstition and Hypocrisy, but their gorgeous sister Fun is an immediately victorious Cinderella and her spirit drives the whole poem. If not promiscuous, Fun is a decidedly erotic young lady as are the young women running barefoot, to save their shoes, towards the thronging excitement and carrying gifts which might be for the satisfaction of appetites other than those of the stomach. Indeed, the whole poem is infused with the way in which the people convert the ‘Occasion', so clerically defined, into an opportunity for their multiple, but especially sexual, appetites:

O happy is that man an' blest!

     Nae wonder that it pride him!

Whase ain dear lass, that he likes best,

     Comes clinkan down beside him!

This echo of
Psalm 46
also alerts us to the fact that the rhetorical world of these preachers breeds sexual ills. For example, in 1.116, ‘cantharidian plaisters' were poultices made from the aphrodisiac Spanish fly.

Burns's assault on the various masters of pulpit oratory names names in a way that ensured there would be a severe backlash against him. ‘Sawney' Moodie, with his old-time, ‘Auld-Licht' undiluted gospel of damnation, is first on stage (ll. 100–17). Moodie (1728–99) was minister of Riccarton near Kilmarnock. He is followed by the ‘New Licht' George Smith (d. 1823), minister of Galston. McGuirk subtly argues that while Burns is criticising Smith's rhetorical banality, he is more intent on satirising the congregation whose appetite for hell-fire preaching excludes the life of actual good-works. Smith's position is then assaulted by William Peebles of Newton-upon-Ayr (1753–1826) who, further inflaming the malign passions of the congregation, drives Common Sense, a central value of the new, more liberal Christianity, from the field. He is succeeded by Alexander Miller (d. 1804) whose professional self-seeking rebounded against him when the parishioners of Kilmaurs subsequently attempted to stop him getting that charge due, he claimed, to the effects of ll. 145–54. The worst is saved to the last. ‘Black' John Russel (c. 1740–1817) was then minister at Kilmarnock. Subsequently minister at Cromarty, Hugh Miller (
My Schools and
Schoolmasters
) testified to his capacity to terrify, indeed, traumatise his congregation.

Along with such manifestations of theocratic control Burns adds some more overt political commentary. ‘Racer Jess' is Janet Gibson (d. 1813), who is the daughter of Poosie Nansie, mine hostess of
Love
and Liberty
, is with her like-inclined companions strategically placed beside the laird's tent. In the same stanza, the ‘
Wabster
lads/ Blackguarding from Kilmarnock' probably belong to the weaving community which was deeply and dissidently radical.

The poem moves from a celebration of alcohol (ll. 163–71) and the triumph of this earthy spirit over the one of false sanctimony to a triumphant assertion, implicit throughout the poem, of spontaneous eroticism. The experienced women may already be dealing out more than bread and cheese but, assignations made, loss of virginity happily looms at the poem's end. As Edwin Muir wrote, regarding the ‘sordid and general tyranny' of the kirk session: ‘it is only necessary to say that the time-honoured Scottish tradition of fornication triumphantly survived all its terrors' (
John Knox
, 1930, pp. 306–7).

1
A street so called, which faces the tent in
Mauchline
. R.B.

2
Shakespeare's
Hamlet
, R.B. [Act I, Sc. 5].

3
The Bell Ringer.

Address to the Deil

First printed in the Kilmarnock edition, 1786.

O Prince! O Chief of many thronèd pow'rs!

That led th' embattl'd seraphim to war —

Milton.

O Thou! whatever title suit thee —

Auld Hornie, Satan, Nick, or Clootie —
old, cloven-hoofed

Wha in yon cavern grim an' sootie,
who, filled with soot

                  Clos'd under hatches,

5
Spairges about the brunstane cootie,
splashes, brimstone dish

                  To scaud poor wretches!
scald

Hear me,
auld Hangie
, for a wee,
old hangman, while

An' let poor
damnèd bodies
be;

I'm sure sma' pleasure it can gie,
give

10
                  Ev'n to a
deil
,
devil

To skelp an' scaud poor dogs like me
hit/slap, scald

                  An' hear us squeel!

Great is thy pow'r an' great thy fame;

Far kend, an' noted is thy name;
known

15
An' tho' yon
lowan heugh's
thy hame,
moaning, hollow, home

                  Thou travels far;

An' faith! thou's neither lag, nor lame,
backward

                  Nor blate nor scaur.
bashful, afraid

Whyles, ranging like a roarin lion,
sometimes

20
For prey, a' holes an' corners tryin;

Whyles, on the strong-wing'd Tempest flyin,

                  Tirlan the
Kirks
;
stripping – attacking

Whyles, in the human bosom pryin,

                  Unseen thou lurks.

25
I've heard my rev'rend
Graunie
say,
grannie

In lanely glens ye like to stray;
lonely

Or, where auld ruin'd castles grey
old

                  Nod to the moon,

Ye fright the nightly wand'rer's way

30
                  Wi' eldritch croon.
unearthly eerie moan

When twilight did my
Graunie
summon,
grannie

To say her pray'rs, douce, honest woman!
sober/prudent

Aft yont the dyke she's heard you bumman,
away beyond

                  Wi' eerie drone;

35
Or, rustlin, thro' the boortries coman,
alder trees coming

                  Wi' heavy groan.

Ae dreary, windy, winter night,
one

The stars shot down wi' sklentan light,
slanting

Wi' you mysel, I gat a fright:
got

40
                  Ayont the lough,
beyond, loch

Ye, like a
rash-buss
, stood in sight,
bunch of rushes

                  Wi' waving sugh:
moan

The cudgel in my nieve did shake,
fist

Each bristl'd hair stood like a stake;

45
When wi' an eldritch, stoor
quaick, quaick
,
unearthly harsh, duck quack

                  Amang the springs,
among

Awa ye squatter'd like a
drake
,
away, a noisy take-off

                  On whistling wings.

Let
Warlocks
grim, an' wither'd
Hags
,

50
Tell how wi' you, on ragweed nags,
ragwort

They skim the muirs an' dizzy crags,
moors, high peaks

                  Wi' wicked speed;

And in kirk-yards renew their leagues,

                  Owre howket dead.
over those raised from the grave

55
Thence, countra wives, wi' toil an' pain,
country

May plunge an' plunge the
kirn
in vain;
churn

For Och! the yellow treasure's taen
taken

                  By witching skill;

An' dawtit, twal-pint
Hawkie's
gaen
petted, 12-pint cow has gone

60
                  As yell's the Bill.
dry, bull

Thence, mystic knots mak great abuse

On
Young-Guidmen
, fond, keen an' croose;
husbands, over confident

When the best
warklum
i' the house,
work-tool, penis

                  By cantraip wit,
magic/evil

65
Is instant made no worth a louse,

                  Just at the bit.
stopped before ejaculation

When thowes dissolve the snawy hoord,
thawes, snowy hoard

An' float the jinglin icy boord,
water's surface

Then,
Water-kelpies
haunt the foord,
imaginary water-spirits, ford

70
                  By your direction,

An' nighted Trav'llers are allur'd

                  To their destruction. 

An' aft your moss-traversing
Spunkies
often, bog-, demons

Decoy the wight that late an' drunk is:
fellow

75
The bleezan, curst, mischievous monkies

                  Delude his eyes,

Till in some miry slough he sunk is,
dirty hole

                  Ne'er mair to rise.
more

When MASONS' mystic
word
an'
grip

80 In storms an' tempests raise you up,

Some cock or cat your rage maun stop,
shall

                  Or, strange to tell!

The
youngest Brother
ye wad whip
would

                  Aff straught to
Hell
.
off straight

85
Lang syne in
Eden's
bonie yard,
long ago

When youthfu' lovers first were pair'd,

An' all the Soul of Love they shar'd,

                  The raptur'd hour,

Sweet on the fragrant flow'ry swaird,
grassy edge

90
                  In shady bow'r:

Then you, ye auld, snick-drawing dog!
old, sly door opener

Ye cam to Paradise incog,
came, disguised

An' play'd on man a cursed brogue
trick

                  (Black be your fa'!),
fall

95
An' gied the infant warld a shog,
gave, world, shake

                  'Maist ruin'd a'. almost

D'ye mind that day when in a bizz
flurry/bustle

Wi' reeket duds, an' reestet gizz,
smoky clothes, scorched wig

Ye did present your smoutie phiz
smutty face

100
                  'Mang better folk;

An' sklented on the
man of Uzz
squinted at Job

                  Your spitefu' joke?

An' how ye gat him i' your thrall,
got, spell

An' brak him out o' house an' hal',
broke

105
While scabs an' blotches did him gall,

                  Wi' bitter claw;

An' lows'd his ill-tongu'd wicked
Scawl
—
slackened, scolding wife

                  Was warst ava?
worst of all

But a' your doings to rehearse,

110
Your wily snares an' fechtin fierce,
fighting

Sin' that day MICHAEL did you pierce

                  Down to this time,

Wad ding a
Lallan
tongue, or
Erse
,
would, beat, Lowland Scots, Irish

                  In Prose or Rhyme.

115
An' now, auld
Cloots
, I ken ye're thinkan,
old, know

A certain Bardie's rantin, drinkin,

Some luckless hour will send him linkan,
hurrying

                  To your black pit;
Hell

But, faith! he'll turn a corner jinkin,
dodging

120
                  An' cheat you yet.

But fare-you-weel, auld
Nickie-ben
!
old

O wad ye tak a thought an' men'!
would, mend

Ye aiblins might — I dinna ken —
perhaps, do not know

                  Still hae a
stake
:
have

125
I'm wae to think upo' yon den,
sad

                  Ev'n for your sake. 

Burns mentions to John Richmond on 17th February 1786 that he had recently completed this poem. It is normally dated to the winter of 1785–6. A poem of this length Burns might have turned out quickly, so it is probably one of the fruits of his intense writing campaign leading to publication of the Kilmarnock edition.

This poem is now generally accepted as a relatively light-weight piece of near comic knockabout as Burns mocks the allegedly fast-fading figure of the Devil from his hitherto central role in Scottish theology and folk-lore. In his essay ‘Robert Burns, Master of Scottish Poetry' (
Uncollected Scottish Criticism
, ed. Noble (London), pp. 199–200), Edwin Muir analyses this poem as the centre-piece of his persuasive argument that during the eighteenth century enlightened, improving, secularising Scotland had lost both its theological passion and its sense of supernatural mystery integral to its older poetry:

… two centuries of religious terrors had faded under the touch of reason and enlightenment, and the mysterious problems of election and damnation, had turned into amusing doggerel:

O Thou wha in the Heavens dost dwell,

Wha, as it pleases best thysel';

Sends ane to heaven and ten to hell,

          A' for thy glory,

And no for any guid or ill

          They've done afore thee!

Calvinism, once feared as a power or hated as a superstition, became absurd under the attack of common reason. The growing powers of the Enlightenment encouraged the change in the universities, the churches, in popular debate, and among the people. The ideas of liberty and equality did their part; Scotland became a place where a man was a man for a' that; the new humanistic attitude to religion led people to believe that ‘The hert's aye the pairt aye that mak's us richt or wrang.' The story of the Fall became a simple story of human misfortune to two
young people whose intentions had been so good, ‘Lang syne in Eden's bonnie yard'.

Then you, ye auld sneck-drawing dog!

Ye cam to Paradise incog.

And played on a man a curse brogue

          (Black be your fa!)

An' gled the infant world a shog

          Maist ruined a'.

Muir further thinks that this new enlightened poetry is, with ‘something of Voltaire's contes and Bernard Shaw's plays', witty but lightweight, even, relative to the old poetry, superficial. There are two related fundamental miscomprehensions in Muir's account. First, the power of folklore is present in the poem though not, say, as we find its direct intrusion as in the great Scottish Ballad tradition, so beloved by Muir, but in Burns's ambivalent treatment of it. As he wrote to Dr Moore:

I sometimes keep a sharp look-out in suspicious places; and though nobody can be more sceptical in these matters than I, yet it often takes an effort of Philosophy to shake of these idle terrors (Letter 125).

What we see in this particular poem from ll. 5–84 is no simple send-up of foolishly atavistic folk-superstition. Not only is Burns intent on anthropologically recording, as in
Halloween
, the customs and beliefs of his rural community but, as in
Tam o'Shanter
, conveying the still ‘eerie' potency of that world. (See Edward J. Cowan, ‘Burns and Superstition',
Love and Liberty
, pp. 229–37.) He is also, as usual, making salacious jokes inspired by the bottomless well of sexual metaphor supplied to him by folk-tradition. Hugh Blair wanted ll. 61–6 deleted as ‘indecent' because they depend on the identification of lume/loom with the penis. (See
BC
, 1932, p. 95.)

Muir, however, is absolutely wrong in thinking that it is the diminished power of Calvinism on the Scottish psyche that leads to the poem's, to him, lightweight tone. This is a particularly weird error in Muir, who more than any other figure in a profoundly anti-Calvinist, Scottish Renaissance group believed that Knox (of whom he actually wrote a biography) had not lost his sadistic, disintegrating grip on the Scottish soul. Further, that Scottish reintegration meant a return to catholic, European humanism.

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