The Children's War (106 page)

“Is there anywhere I have to say I believe in God?” he asked as he scanned through the pamphlet.

Zosia screwed up her face in thought. “I don’t think so. Not if you don’t say the creed. If you just stick to the vows, you should be okay. But God is invoked a lot.”

“You should be comfortable doing that,” Marysia remarked sardonically without looking up from what she was writing. “According to Olek, you invoke God all the time.”

Ah, yes. He really should clean up his English. “Sorry, it’s part of my local dialect. I’ll try and be more—um—circumspect, in the future.”

“Yes, do try.”

Zosia looked up at him, gave him a conspiratorial shrug.

The kettle whistled and he turned to make his tea. “Do either of you want a cup?” he asked, but they both shook their heads. As he cautiously sipped the brew, he asked, “I don’t need to, er, eat anything, do I?”

Marysia looked up at him, a look of utter disapproval on her face. “If you mean receive the host, no—it’s an honor. One you haven’t earned.”

“Ah. Again, my apologies. I’m a bit untutored in this religion thing.” He had almost said
crap
but had caught himself in time. “But it is permitted for Zosia to marry me and still use your ceremony?”

“Yes, yes, yes. We can accommodate heathens and atheists,” Marysia replied impatiently.

“Good.” He grinned at her. “And where exactly do I get to work in my blood sacrifice to the tree gods?”

Marysia glanced up at him sharply. “You— Oh, you’re joking.”

Zosia laughed, said, “What I want to know is, when do we get to sacrifice a virgin? I haven’t had one in ages!”

“No respect,” Marysia muttered shaking her head, “no respect.” She looked up at Peter again, tried to maintain a serious expression. “You know, young man, we take these things seriously, not like you British.”

“Oh, so you’ve heard about English marriages.”

“Yes, everyone has. The Germans point to it as proof that you’re all corrupt. Marrying to be on a housing list!” Marysia tried to sound disgusted.

“Well, don’t the locals do that here?”

“No,” Zosia replied, suddenly quite serious.“Marriage is essentially forbidden for
Nichtdeutsch.”

“What? You’re kidding!”

“No, unfortunately not,” Marysia agreed with Zosia. “The law was enacted in 1942 that the only way to be legally married is to prove that it will ‘raise the racial standard of the Polish people.’ ”

“And that,” Zosia continued, “as you may guess, is not easily proved. I mean,” she added impishly, “how can you improve on perfection?”

Peter shook his head in amazement. “So marriage is basically illegal?”

Marysia shrugged. “You are surprised? After all, it was for you, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, for me, everything was illegal.”

“In any case,” Marysia explained, “it serves a useful technical purpose for them. As long as marriage is forbidden, it is impossible to have children legally, so whenever they want, they have the legal right to seize the children and throw the parents in prison.”

“Ah, so any
Nichtdeutsch
who marries or has children is a criminal.”

“Yes, it’s very easy to be a criminal here.”

“I never understood why they bothered with all the technicalities, you know, why they feel the need to have laws to back up their immoral acts.”

Zosia shrugged. Marysia said, “Maybe if they make it legal, they think it is moral as well. Many people confuse legality and morality, then they never have to examine their own conscience about what they do.”

“I really don’t have time for this right now!” Zosia said abruptly, and got up and left. Both Peter and Marysia stared after her, taken aback by her sudden departure.

“What was that all about?” he asked helplessly.

“Oh”—Marysia dismissed his concern with a wave of her hand—“she must be nervous. Maybe she feels she’s rushing things.”

“We’re not rushing, we’ve known each other more than a year now.”

Marysia sputtered, “I tell you, this isn’t like her at all. She’s not one to marry. Even with Adam, she hesitated!”

“Even?”

“You know what I mean. They knew each other for years, they were a natural couple, not like you two.”

“Not like . . .” He paused, looked at her a moment. “You don’t think we should marry, do you?”

Marysia looked down at the piece of paper on which she had been writing as though it contained a script she should read, but she did not say anything.

“Why not?”

She sighed. “You are from wildly different backgrounds. I don’t think either of you have thought this thing through.”

He bristled slightly.

“Oh, don’t bother taking offense, it’s the truth. I mean, never mind about all you’ve been through, or Zosia’s unusual upbringing. What about culture? What about religion? What do you two really have in common?” Marysia asked, almost as if pleading. “All I’m saying is, I think you both should think long and hard about this marriage idea.”

“I’ve already thought about it quite long enough, thank you,” he stated coldly.

“Well, then, nothing I say will matter, will it?” she concluded somewhat forlornly.

“No, it won’t. I’m not going to let your jealousy over your son ruin my only chance at happiness.”

“That’s not my motivation,” she said stiffly.

“I think it is. You’ve finally worked out that I’m not going to step into his shoes, I’m going to displace him altogether, and you don’t like that.”

“Oh, what do I know about marriage.” Marysia sounded resigned. “I’m just an old woman whose husband ran away . . .”

“Oh, don’t trot out that old song, we’re not talking about how your marriage was fucked up here.”

“I’ll thank you to watch your tongue in my presence.”

He sighed. “I’m sorry. Zosia’s not the only one on edge.”

“Don’t worry, son, it’s normal.”

He smiled at her calling him son. “Thanks, Ma. I don’t suppose you’d like to have some vodka with me?”

“You drink too much,” she said as he went to the cabinet to get a bottle.

“I know.”

35

“S
O WHAT’S GOING ON?”
Zosia asked as Anna poured out some vodka for her and Ryszard. From where Zosia was sitting, she could just manage to see out the window of her parents’ town house to the windswept street below. The gusts whipped up whirlwinds of snow and hurled them along the desolate canyon formed by the huge blocks of public housing. The windows clattered in their frames, and though the flat was warm, Zosia shuddered.

Alex made a face. “Bad news again, I’m afraid.”

“What now?”

“The information we’ve sent them on that sterility program. It’s been classified.”

“Peter and his team haven’t even finished decoding it all!” Zosia exclaimed.

“I know, I know. Nevertheless, we’ve already sent the headline news, and they’ve thanked us for the information and put a gag on it.”

“What would happen if you ignored the gag order?”

Alex shook his head. “The Cabinet feels we have too much to lose. Nevertheless, don’t tell Peter—have his office keep up the translations. Maybe we can find something we can use—maybe we can leak the information to the American press via another route.”

“I think we should just ignore their gag order. They don’t have the right to issue us commands. Especially now!” Ryszard grumbled. “Have you told HQ yet about the secret talks?”

Alex nodded. “They’re worried, but they agree with the Cabinet that it’s not sufficient reason to take such a drastic step. Besides, if we violate the gag order on this, that could scupper our chances at those talks.”

Ryszard sputtered. “We have no chances. We have no representation there!”

“What are you talking about?” Zosia asked.

Alex pushed a folder of papers across to his daughter. “This is one of the reasons I wanted to talk to you personally. I want you to officially convey this information to the Szaflary Council. I’ve already presented it to HQ, and they know we’ll be sending the relevant copies back with you.”

Zosia opened the folder and began scanning the papers as Alex continued, “It seems there has been an official invitation from within the NAU Foreign Ministry to begin some sort of talks with the Reich. They’ve suggested Helsinki for the venue. As you can see, there are several items on the tentative agenda which are . . .” Alex hesitated as he searched for the appropriate diplomatic phrase.

“They are an outright betrayal of us,” Anna filled in the silence. “They want to negotiate formalizing the status quo and accepting our land as being official Reich territory in exchange for some vague human-rights statements.”

“A peace accord?” Zosia asked.

“A sellout,” Ryszard said.

“Yes,” Alex agreed. “They feel that there’s no longer any point feigning our independence. There are elements within their Foreign Ministry who feel we would be better served if we were given an official status within the Reich. Then they could agitate for our rights from that platform, rather than refuse all dealings with the Reich government. Perhaps they have a point.”

“No!” Zosia scolded. “You know what happens! They turn a blind eye to anything that happens once it’s within the sovereign borders of a state!”

“They’re not seeing much now anyway, and anytime we show them something, we get stomped on.” Alex sighed. “That’s the other thing I wanted to talk about, and that’s why I called you up here in person and without Peter. I’ve looked a bit further into using him as you suggested, and I’ve already made some tentative arrangements. The problem is, we’re going to be able to pull a stunt like this only once. If we use Peter, we’ll be throwing all our eggs into one basket.”

“One very unstable basket,” Ryszard added. “I think we’d be better off using an actor. Or anyone else.”

Somewhat annoyed, Alex shook his head. “We’ve already discussed your concerns.” He turned his attention back to Zosia. “Now Ryszard said that Kasia talked to Peter at length while he visited and she was of the opinion that he was not very keen on talking about his experiences. She said his story was compelling but she had to drag the details out of him. We’d need more than that. He’d have to wholeheartedly prostitute his history if we’re going to have any hope of getting people there to listen.”

Zosia nodded. “When he wants to be, he’s convincing.”

“What about the psychiatrist’s report?” Anna asked. “You know, she said this sort of thing could push him over the edge.”

Zosia shook her head. “It won’t.”

“Anyway, he only has to make it through the month,” Ryszard observed, “then it doesn’t matter. In fact, a suicide, halfway through—now
that
would be effective!”

Zosia gave Ryszard a sharp look, but then her expression changed to one of cold agreement. “Yes, that’s all we need.”

Anna raised her eyebrows in surprise, but did not comment. “What about his loyalty to us?” Alex asked. “We have every reason to believe he’s genuine, but no real reason to believe he’s loyal to anything or anybody other than himself. Everything he endured, he did for himself, for survival. There was no element of heroism in it.”

“All the better for proving our point,” Zosia observed.

“Yes,” Alex agreed, “but we need to know that he’ll do a good job, and even more important, we need to know that he’s devoted to us so that he’s not inclined to deliberately cause problems.”

“Why in heavens name would he deliberately cause trouble?” Zosia asked.

Alex cast a glance at Ryszard and Anna before answering. “We’ve found out a bit more about his history. Seems that betrayal that cost everyone their lives and cost Peter his freedom, well, it was a messy business. It came from over the pond.”

“Won’t that actually make Peter feel better to have that question answered in his mind?” Zosia asked, somewhat confused.

Alex shook his head. “I doubt it. The hierarchy knew his group was in danger long before they sent a warning. Once they learned about the danger, they decided to wait and use his group as bait to catch the traitor. Clearly, they cut it too close.”

“Oh, God!” Zosia moaned.

“It gets worse. There was a trial for the traitor, a reasonably quiet affair, resulting in a short-term prison sentence. He had royal connections, you see. The problem was, the group used as bait—Peter’s group—were from the ‘allied faction,’ that is, the antiroyalist Republicans who were only working with the government as part of a united front. Citing the government’s obvious carelessness with its allies, the Republicans in Toronto tried to use that
betrayal as leverage for more power, but it all backfired—they were actually temporarily excluded from the government instead, and the whole incident was hushed up.”

“So how did you find out about it?”

“A friend of a friend remembered it personally. She was able to dig up some microfilm of Republican newsletters from that time, and putting those together with her reminiscences and with what Peter said, it all becomes clear.”

“So that’s why we had such a hard time finding anything,” Zosia mused.

“Yes. Just as well, too. If you had had access to the official archives in Toronto, you would have found that they ascribe the whole fiasco to unknown causes with the strong implication that it was a betrayal by Yardley.”

“What!”

“Well, that neatly covered up any carelessness on their part, and since they thought Yardley was dead, I guess they figured it wouldn’t do him any harm.”

“Those bastards!” Zosia spat. She squinted in thought, then muttered, “He was right. If he had run back to England and told them who he was, someone from the organization would have killed him.”

Alex shrugged. “You see, if the Germans knew about that and told him—they could have turned him—he might be out seeking vengeance, just using us as a way to get to the English, especially the higher-ups in America.”

Zosia shook her head.“No, he honestly doesn’t know.”

“Well, it has to remain that way!” Anna warned.“He certainly showed no tendency toward self-control during his visit to Ryszard’s!”

“And whatever your feelings may be, little sister,” Ryszard added, “he still hasn’t been left out on his own. We have no proof that he wouldn’t run right to his handler and spill his guts the minute he gets a chance.”

“Oh, I’ve already tested that,” Zosia said. “I let him loose in Berlin and had an agent tail him. He did exactly what I predicted. He went to look at the Vogels’ house and did nothing else.”

“You took that sort of chance! Who the hell gave you permission!” Ryszard nearly screamed.

“I gave myself clearance!” Zosia retorted. “I explained it all to Wanda and the others afterwards as proof of his trustworthiness.”

“Yes,” Anna sighed. “But as they noted in their report to us, he may have known he was being tailed.”

“Anything is possible!” Zosia sneered.

“And he stopped in a shop,” Anna added.

“He bought a necklace,” Zosia asserted wearily. “This one, in fact.” She fingered the diamond.

“And he wrote a postcard,” Anna continued.

“The agent saw the Vogel girl’s name on it,” Zosia sighed, exasperated. “There comes a point where questioning his story is just paranoia, and I think they’ve passed that point.”

Ryszard glowered but did not disagree. “Nothing we say to her is going to make a difference. Our little Zosienka is in love.”

“I am not!” Zosia exclaimed.

“Yes, you are, little sister,” Ryszard insisted.

“I am not in love!” Zosia hissed.

“You’re not?” Anna asked. “Are you . . . are you pregnant?”

“No,” Zosia answered brusquely.

“Then why are you marrying him?” Anna asked.

Zosia stared out the window. She did not look at any of them as she answered in a muted voice, “Because I told him I would.”

“Oh, Zosiu! Didn’t I ever tell you there’s a time to stop playing games! Why did you do such a thing?” Anna asked.

“Well, we had just finished working together at that lab, you know. We worked the whole night together, we really made a great team. And then there was that fiasco at the end. They hurt him so badly . . .”

“Always the cold-blooded professional, eh?” Ryszard scoffed.

“He had warned me and I hadn’t listened to him. And I felt so . . . Then on the train, with that Vogel man—I almost lost him then! God . . . I don’t know, I guess I felt guilty about how badly he was hurt, about putting him in such danger.”

“Guilty? You’re marrying him out of guilt!” Anna almost shrieked.

“No, no, no!” Zosia waved her hand in frustration.

Anna sighed and looked out the window to see what Zosia was staring at so intensely, but there was nothing unusual there. She turned back to her daughter. “If you don’t love him, then why?”

“Well, I thought I did. I mean, when I thought I might lose him, then afterwards . . . I just felt so happy he was okay. And in that pension, while he was recuperating, I felt so close to him, I just wanted to be with him forever.”

“And how long did that last?” Ryszard asked perceptively.

“Oh, about a week,” Zosia moaned. “Then I realized, it just couldn’t work.”

“So why not back out?” Anna asked gently. “There’s still time.”

“I’ve already announced it to everyone—I don’t want to look like an impetuous fool. And it made him so happy, I couldn’t bear to hurt him, and I thought it would be good for Joanna, she was really happy with the idea.”