Authors: Michael Connelly
"Fuck you, asshole," he said out loud.
Just as he was about to finally key the engine he saw the mattress being removed from the apartment. Two people he assumed were crime scene specialists gingerly carried the bulky piece vertically through the door and down the stairs to a van marked lapd scientific
INVESTIGATION DIVISION.
The mattress had been wrapped in thick plastic that was opaque like a shower curtain. The wide and dark blotch at its center clearly showed through. The sight of it being held up in the harsh light immediately depressed Pierce. It was as if they were holding up a billboard that advertised that he had been too late to do anything for Lilly Quinlan.
The mattress was too big and wide to fit in the van. The people from the Scientific Investigation Division hoisted it up onto a rack on top of the vehicle and then secured it with rope. Pierce guessed that the plastic wrapping would secure the integrity of whatever evidence would come from it.
When he looked away from the van he noticed that Renner was standing in the doorway of the apartment, looking at him. Pierce held his stare for a long moment and then started the car. Because of all the official cars clogging the alley, he had to back all the way down to Speedway before being able to turn around and head home.
At his apartment ten minutes later he lifted the phone and immediately got the broken dial tone indicating he had messages. Before checking them he hit the redial button because he knew the last call he had made had been to Robin. The call went to voice mail without a ring, indicating she had turned off the phone or was on a call.
"Listen, Robin, it's me, Henry Pierce. I know you were angry with me but please listen to what I have to say right now. After you left I found the door to Lilly's apartment open. The landlord was in there clearing the place out. We found what looked like blood on the bed and we had to call the cops. I pretty much kept you-"
The beep sounded and he was cut off. He hit redial again, wondering why she had set such a short message window on her phone service. He got a busy signal.
"Damn it!"
He started over and got the busy signal again. Frustrated, he walked out through the bedroom to the balcony. The sea breeze was strong and biting. The Ferris wheel lights were still on, though the amusement park had closed at midnight. He pushed redial again and held the phone to his ear. This time it rang and after one ring was picked up by the real Robin. Her voice was sleepy.
"Robin?"
"Yeah, Henry?"
"Yes, don't hang up. I was just leaving you a message. I --"
"I know. I was just listening to it. Did you get mine?"
"What, a message? No. I just got home. I've been with the cops all night. Listen, I know you're mad at me but, like I was trying to say on the message, the cops are going to be calling you. I kept you out of it. I didn't say you brought me there or anything else. But when they asked me how I knew Lilly was from Tampa and her mother was there, I told them you told me. It was the only way out. For me, I admit, but I didn't think it would be a problem for you. I mean, your pages are linked. They would have gotten around to talking to you anyway."
"It's okay."
He was silent for a moment, surprised by her reaction.
"I told them I convinced you I wanted to find Lilly to make sure she was okay and that you believed me and that's why you told me things about her."
"You know, you did convince me. That's why I called and left a message. Good thing I have caller ID and had your number. I wanted to tell you I was sorry about what I said in that alley. That was very uncool."
"Don't worry about it."
17S
"Thanks."
They were both silent for a moment.
"Look," Pierce said. "The mattress in that place .. . There was a lot of blood. I don't know what happened to Lilly but if she was trying to get out of the business to go to school ... I know you're afraid of Billy Wentz but you should be more than that, Robin. Whatever you do, be careful."
She didn't say anything.
"You have to get away from him and that business. But, listen to me, when you do, don't tell a soul about it. Just disappear without them knowing you're leaving. I think that might have been the mistake Lilly made. She might've told him or told somebody that took it back to him."
"And you think he did this? She made him money. Why would he--"
"I don't know. I don't know what to think. It could've been the person she was with before she was supposed to meet you. It could've been a lot of things. I saw things in that apartment, whips and masks and things. Who knows what happened to her. But it could have been Wentz sending out the message: Nobody leaves. All I'm saying is that it's a dangerous world you work in, Robin. You should get out of it and you should be damn careful about it when you do."
She was silent and he knew he wasn't telling her anything she didn't already know. Then he thought he heard her crying but he wasn't sure.
"Are you all right?"
"Yes," she said. "It's just that it's not so easy, you know. Quitting. Getting out and going back to the square. I mean, what else do I do? I make a lot of money doing this. More than I'll ever make anywhere else. What should I do, work at a McDonald's? I probably couldn't even get a job there. What do I put on the application, that I've been whoring for the last two years?"
It wasn't the conversation Pierce thought he was going to get into with her. He walked inside from the balcony and back into the living room. He had two new chairs but took his usual spot on the old couch.
"Robin? I don't even know your last name."
"LaPorte. And my name isn't Robin, either."
"What is it?"
"It's Lucy."
"Well, I like that better. Lucy LaPorte. Yeah, I like that. It's got a good sound."
"I have to give everything else to these men. I decided I'd keep my name."
She seemed to have stopped crying.
"Well .. . Lucy, if I can call you that. You keep my number. When you're ready to walk away from that life, you call me and I'll do everything I can to help you do it. Money, job, an apartment, whatever you need, just call me and you've got it. I'll do what I
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can.
"It's because of your sister that you'd do it, isn't it?"
Pierce thought about this before answering.
"I don't know. Probably."
"I don't care. Thank you, Henry."
"Okay, Lucy. I think I'm going to crash now. It's been a long day and I'm tired. I'm sorry I woke you up."
"Don't worry about it. And don't worry about the cops. I'll handle them."
"Thanks. Good night."
He ended the call and then checked his voice mail for messages. He had five. Or rather, Lilly had three and he had two. He erased Lilly's as soon as he determined they were not for him. His first message was from Charlie.
Just wanted to see how it went in the lab today and to ask if you'd had a chance to review the patent apps yet. If you see any problems, we should know first thing Monday so we have time to fix--"
He erased the message. His plan was to review the patent applications in the morning. He'd call Charlie back after that.
He listened to the entire message from Lucy LaPorte. Hey, it's Robin. Look, I just wanted to say I'm sorry about what I said to you at the end. I've just been mad at the whole fucking world lately. But the truth is I can tell you care about Lilly and want to make sure she's okay. Maybe I acted the way I did because I wish there was somebody in the world that cared that way about me. So,
anyway, that's it. Give me a call sometime if you want. We can just hang out. And next time I won't make you buy a smoothie. Bye."
For some reason he saved the message and clicked off. He thought maybe he'd want to listen to it again. He bumped the phone against his chin for a few minutes while he thought about Lucy. There was an underlying sweetness about her that pushed through her harsh mouth and the reality of what she did in order to make her way in the world. He thought about what she had said to him about using the name Robin and keeping the name Lucy for herself.
I have to give everything else to these men. I decided I'd keep my name.
He remembered the police detective sitting in the living room, talking to his mother and stepfather. His father was there, too. He told them that Isabelle had been using another name on the street and with the men she went with to get money. He remembered that the detective said that she used the name Angel.
Pierce knew that Renner had him pegged. What had happened so long ago was always close below the surface. It had bubbled up over the top when the mystery of Lilly Quinlan presented itself. In his desire to find Lilly, to maybe save her, he was finding and saving his own lost sister.
Pierce thought it was an amazing and horrible world out there. What people did to one another but mostly to themselves. He thought maybe this was the reason he shut himself away in the lab for so many hours each day. He shut himself away from the world, from knowing or thinking about bad things. In the lab everything was clear and simple. Quantifiable. Scientific theory was tested and either proved or disproved. No gray areas. No shadows.
He suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to talk to Nicole, to tell her that in the last two days he had learned something he hadn't known before. Something that was hard to put into words but still palpable in his chest. He wanted to tell her that he no longer was going to chase the dime, that as far as he was concerned, it could chase him.
He clicked on the phone and dialed her number. His old number. Amalfi Drive. She picked up the phone after three rings. Her voice was alert but he could tell she had been asleep.
"Nicole, it's me."
"Henry .. what?"
"I know it's late but I --"
"No ... we talked about this. You told me you weren't going to do this."
"I know. But I want to talk to you."
"Have you been drinking?"
"No. I just want to tell you something."
"It's the middle of the night. You can't do this."
"Just this one time. I need to tell you something. Let me come over and-"
"No, Henry, no. I was sound asleep. If you want to talk, call me tomorrow. Good-bye now."
She hung up. He felt his face grow hot with embarrassment. He had just done something that before this night he was sure he would never have done, that he couldn't even imagine himself doing.
He groaned loudly and stood up and went to the windows. Out past the pier to the north he could make out the necklace of lights that marked the Pacific Coast Highway. The mountains rising above it were Jark shapes barely discernible below the night sky. He could hear the ocean better than he could see it. The horizon was lost somewhere out there in the darkness.
He felt depressed and tired. His mind drifted from Nicole back to thoughts about Lucy and what he now knew appeared to have been Lilly's fate. As he looked out into the night he promised himself that he would not forget what he had said to Lucy. When she decided she wanted out and was ready to make the move, he would be there if for no other reason than for himself. Who knows, he thought, it could end up being the best thing he ever did with his life.
Just as he looked at it, the lights of the Ferris wheel went out. He that as a cue and went back inside the apartment. On the couch he picked up the phone and dialed his voice mail. He listened to the message from Lucy one more time, then went to bed. He had no sheets or blankets or pillows yet. He pulled the sleeping bag up onto if,e new mattress and climbed inside. He then realized he had n't eaten anything all day. It was the first time he remembered that ever having happened during a day spent outside the lab. He fell asleep as he was mentally composing a list of things to do when he woke up in the morning.
Soon he was dreaming of a dark hallway with open doors on each side. As he moved down the hallway he would look through each doorway. Each room he looked into was like a hotel room with a bed and a bureau and a TV. And each room was occupied. Mostly by people he didn't recognize and who did not notice him looking. There were couples who were arguing, fucking and crying. Through one doorway he recognized his own parents. His mother and father, not his stepfather, though they were at an age that came after they were divorced. They were getting dressed to go out to a cocktail party.
Pierce moved on down the hallway and in another room saw Detective Renner. He was by himself and was pacing alongside the bed. The sheets and covers were off the bed and there was a large bloodstain on the mattress.
Pierce moved on and in another room Lilly Quinlan was on the bed, as still as a mannequin. The room was dark. She was naked and her eyes were on the television. Though Pierce could not see the screen from his angle of view, the blue glow it threw on Lilly's face made her look dead. He took a step into the room to check on her and she looked up at him. She smiled and he smiled and he turned to close the door, only to find there was no door to the room. When he looked back to her for an explanation, the bed was empty and only the television was on.
At exactly noon on Sunday the phone woke up Pierce. A man said, "Is it too early to speak to Lilly?"
Pierce said, "No, actually it's too late."
He hung up and looked at his watch. He thought about the dream he'd had and set to work interpreting it, but then groaned as the first memory of the rest of the night poked into his thoughts. The call he'd made to Nicole in the middle of the night. He climbed out of the sleeping bag and off the bed to take a long, hot shower while he thought about whether to call her again to apologize. But even the stinging hot water couldn't wash away the embarrassment he felt. He decided it would be best not to call her or try to explain himself. He'd try to forget what he had done.
By the time he was dressed his stomach was loudly demanding food but there was nothing in the kitchen, he had no money and his ATM card was tapped out until Monday. He knew he could go to a restaurant or a grocery store and use a credit card but that would take too long. He had come out of the embarrassment of the Nicole call and the baptism of the shower with a desire to put the Lilly Quinlan episode behind him and let the police handle it. He had to get back to work. And he knew that any delay in getting to Amedeo might undermine his resolve.