The Coincidence 04 The Probability of Violet and Luke (4 page)

I squeeze my eyes closed and tell myself to shut it all down.
Don’t feel a thing.
“Fine, I’ll do it, but I swear to God if someone says something about you saying that I was going to take care of them, I’ll kick you in the balls when I get home.”

“I like it when you talk kinky to me,” he says with a deep chuckle. “Now get out there and make me happy then come back to me. I’m starting to miss you.”

I feel like I’m going to barf right here in front of everyone, all over the grass. I shake my head, annoyed, but still tell him okay, because I don’t really have a choice. Then I hang up and go back over to Roy, smiling as sweetly as I can. “All right Roy, where are we going?”

“Up on Fifth and Grove,” he says with a grin as his gaze lazily takes me in.

We start across the campus yard. It’s quiet between the two of us and I’m pretty content with it, but apparently Roy isn’t because he says, “So do you like playing Texas Hold’em?”

I shrug, trying not to think about the last time I played Texas Hold’em with Luke while he was wearing a towel. “It’s okay, I guess.”

He stops in front of a black Mercedes with tinted windows and shiny chrome trim. He aims the keys at it and it beeps, the lights flashing and the doors unlocking. “Well, if I were you, I’d pretend that you love it for tonight.”

I nod, getting his meaning. “Got it.”

We get into the car and he turns on the engine. Then he cranks the heat when he notices that I’m shivering a little from the chilly breeze outside. “You should have worn a jacket or something.” he remarks as he buckles the seatbelt.

I glance down at the goosebumps on my legs. “A jacket isn’t part of my uniform,” I tell him, bouncing my knees up and down, trying to warm up.

“Oh, gottcha,” he says as he pushes the shifter into reverse. “There’s some Vodka under the seat if you want a shot.” He backs up the car and straightens the wheel, then flashes me a grin. “It might warm you up.”

I’m about to decline, because I’m not a fan of drinking—it makes me too crazy and emotional—but then I remember what I’m supposed to be. And that if I do mess this up, then I mess up the little life that I have. So instead I put on my dazzling smile, the fake one I haven’t worn in a while, then reach under the seat, to take a shot, pretending to be okay, pretending I’m not drowning in a sea of pain. Pretending that I’m okay with being here, when I’m not.

It used to be so much easier to do this, float around in life, detached from everyone, including myself. But that was before I met Luke and discovered what it was like to be happy. And the worst part of it is knowing I’ll never have it again.

Chapter 4

Luke

I’m in deep shit but I’m still trying to figure out if I care. Some pop song plays from the surround sound, empty glasses cover the table, and I’ve doubled my money, mainly because I’m cheating and very carelessly too. I should probably be more cautious, but I continue to ride high, drinking shot after shot with a curvy brunette on my lap. I’ve gotten everything I was looking for when I came here and I feel good for the most part, except for that goddamn spot in my heart that’s screaming at me to stop. That there’s something better than this out there for me. But what my fucking heart doesn’t get is that she doesn’t want me.

There are three other guys sitting at the table—Geraldson, the owner of the house, a big bulky dude—and the other two about the same height and weight as me—Carson and I think Dougford, who doesn’t trust me. They’re older and rougher than the usual crowd I play with. I think I even saw a gun tucked into the back of Geraldson’s pants when I walked up to the table. Toverson is out on the back deck, talking to someone on the cellphone, but keeps glancing through the door in my direction, giving me a look of warning.

“You in or out?” Carson asks, fanning through his chips as he tries to read my bluff.

I glance down at the eight of hearts and queen of spades in my hand and then at the four cards on the table; a five, seven, nine, and a jack. I’m about to fold, but then the brunette slants forward and presses her tits against my chin, giving me a face full of cleavage.

“Just go for it,” she whispers in my ear, tickling her finger up and down the back of my neck. “It’s so hot when guys are risky like that.”

I’m about to tell her to fuck off, reach into my pocket and take out one of the cards I have hidden in there, but Dougford is watching my every move from across the table, so I toss the chips in, figuring I’ll lose one hand to make my wins look more legit. “I’m in.” I say, being cocky for no goddamn reason.

Carson gives me an arrogant grin in return, but I think he’s pretending he’s got something when he doesn’t. I relax back in the chair and grope the brunette’s hips while the dealer flips over the river card. It’s a two. Shit. I have absolutely nothing. Normally, I’d fold or switch my cards, but I remind myself to lose a hand and match the bet.

He grins like a prick as he lays his cards down and reveals that he has a pair of queens. I know the odds of that are pretty low, making me think that he might be cheating so I decide no more cautious playing—I’m cheating with every hand that I can from now on.

It takes a lot not to shove the brunette off my lap and lean over and punch the grin off his face. To calm myself down, I pour myself another shot from the Tequila bottle on the table. I barely feel the burn anymore—barely feel anything at all.

It’s Geraldson’s turn to deal so he collects the cards while Dougford takes out a couple of cigars from a wooden box that’s beside him. He smells one of them, then gives Geraldson and Carson each one.

“You smoke?” he asks me in his raspy voice.

I shrug and take the cigar he’s offering, figuring it might keep me content until I can step outside to have a smoke. People are so weird sometimes. No smoking cigarettes in the house, but cigars are perfectly okay.

I light up and inhale, but it’s not enough to soothe the hunger inside me, so I end up putting it out in the ashtray after three puffs.

“What? Not good enough for you?” Carson asks, separating his chips in to color coordinated piles.

I reach for the cards Gerard dealt me. “No, it’s just not what I usually smoke.” My tension starts to unravel when I see the ace in my hand. I’ve been waiting for the damn ace to show up so I could use the one I have up my sleeve. Pocket aces.

I’m trying not to grin as I get ready for the game to get going, when the front door swings open and a guy around my age wearing preppy clothes and a cocky smile walks into the room.

“Roy, man. What’s up?” Geraldson says, setting his cards face down on the table as he gets up from his chair to give the guy a one-handed hug.

“Not much,” Roy says as he steps aside to let someone else in that’s behind him and suddenly every single movement and noise around me fades.

Violet, fucking, Hayes.

She looks way too amazing, dressed in a short black dress that shows off her endless legs and the heels… god damn what I would do to fuck her with just those heels on. I’m seriously getting a hard on just thinking about it, which would be fine except the brunette on my lap must feel it pressing against her ass and she gets this look in her eyes like she thinks it’s from her and is considering acting on it. Suddenly I’m very aware that she’s on my lap. Through the fogginess in my mind, I debate whether I care or not. Violet and I are over. I shouldn’t care, but I do. I care so much that I hurry and push the brunette off of my lap, before Violet sees me.

But I move to late and her eyes find me like magnets and I’m metal just as I’m shoving the woman off. There’s a flash of jealousy in Violet’s eyes as she glares at the woman who’s gripping my shoulders to get her balance, and as disturbing as it is, I fucking love the sight of it in her eyes. That she still cares enough to get jealous.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Violet tears her gaze off me as Roy says something to her and the woman that was on my lap gives me a nasty look before heading into the kitchen to get a drink. Violet sticks out her hand to shake Geraldson’s hand, flashing him a fake smile—I know her well enough to know that’s not her real smile. Geraldson doesn’t stand a chance against whatever she’s got up her sleeve—whatever the reason is that she’s here. They say something to each other in low voices and I become very aware of why she’s here. Dealing. Motherfucking hell, this isn’t good. Not here with these guys. This isn’t the same as her little deals with college frat boys. These are hardcore bookies and I’m guessing hardcore dealers.

“Sit. Have a drink and play with us,” Geraldson says to Roy, gesturing at the table. Then he turns to Violet and arches his brow. “You like watching men play Texas Hold’em, sweet thing?”

She discretely glances at me from the corner of her eye with a look on her face that I can tell means she’s biting back a snide retort over Geraldson’s sexist remark. “Sure,” she says tightly.

“Good, then sit down, have a drink, and we’ll chat.” Geraldson grins and motions for her to sit down in an empty seat, the one beside me of all places. Violet looks tense, but still comes over and while she’s walking, Geraldson’s checking out her ass the entire way.

I expect Violet to waver before sitting but being the pro that she is, she manages to take a seat without so much as a flash of hesitation. She doesn’t look at me though, even when her leg brushes against mine from under the table, but it causes my breath to catch in my throat.
Guess I’m losing on the who wants who more hand.

“Violet, this is Dougford, Carson,” Gerald starts with introductions as he sits down at the table and then each guy reaches across the table to shake Violet’s hand. Then he goes to me. “And this is Luke.”

Violet turns her head in my direction, her eyes sparkling. If I didn’t know better, I’d guess she was enjoying this. But how could she be when she can barely look at me in class? “It’s nice to meet you, Luke.” She raises her eyebrows slightly then sticks out her hand for me to shake.

Okay, so I guess we’re pretending like we don’t know each other then. “And it’s nice to meet you, Violet.” I exhale as I take her hand. Our skin comes into contact, the first time in two months. I think I’m going deaf. Blind. Or maybe it’s that she’s taking over all of my senses. My thoughts are swirling so fast that my pulse starts to pound and between that and the amount of alcohol in me, I think I might blackout.

“Breathe.” I swear to God she whispers this under her lips, but I’m not sure if it’s to herself or me. Then she flinches, blinking her attention away from me, and calmly pulls her hand away from mine.

Roy goes over to the bar area and pours Violet a drink. Whiskey I think by the amber liquid in the cup, then takes a seat himself. Violet casually gives the drink a sniff, then takes a large swallow, forcing back a gag before setting the glass down on a coaster. Then she sits back without so much as a glance in my direction as the cards are dealt, talking to Geraldson about quantities and other shit that makes me so infuriated I get distracted and more sloppy with each hand. I’m not being as careful as I should.

Get your act together
. But it’s difficult when she’s chatting to a man with a gun tucked in the back of his pants about drugs.

“So you think you’d want how much on a regular basis?” Violet asks Geraldson. I wonder if Violet’s planning on screwing him over like she does with some of her clients. If so, I need to stop her. These are not the kind of people to be doing that to.

“An ounce to a quarter,” Geraldson says as he studies the cards in his hand intently.

Violet’s jaw tightens while I tense myself. It’s a big amount, definitely not those little dime bags she usually deals. She quickly reaches for the glass of whiskey and finishes it off to hide her nervousness and I have to wonder is she even knows what she’s getting into.

After a few large swallows, Violet sets the glass down on the coaster and collects herself. “Did you mention the amount to Preston?” she asks coolly.

Geraldson nods, nodding at the dealer to turn over the river card. “Yeah, he said you’d bring some samples with you today that we could test out.”

Violets nod, appearing composed on the outside, but I know her better than that. She’s uneasy, out of her element, as she reaches into her bra, pulls out a bag of weed, and tosses it onto the table on top of the chip pile.

“Nice,” Roy says, eyeing her breasts and the weed while Dougford nods in agreement.

Geraldson sets his cards face down, picks up the bag, opens it up, and smells the inside of it with an approving look on his face. “Mind if I light a bowl?” he asks Violet. “Just to taste for quality?”

“That’s what it’s for,” she replies, starting to fidget with her hands below the table.

Geraldson gets up to get a pipe and Violet glances around the room as if she’s searching for an escape route. “Could one of you boys point me to the ladies restroom?”

Nodding, Roy eagerly gets to his feet. “Yeah, let me show you.” There’s an excited look on his face, like a guy going to get a blowjob as they walk out of the room together and that stupid fire erupts inside my chest again and I’m unsure how to put it out. Or whether I even should.

Violet

I want to bang my head against the wall. “God dammit, Preston. That’s too much weed to deal without some heavy consequences.” It makes me wonder who the fuck these guys are exactly that they’d need that much weed. One of them is carrying a gun for hells sakes. Yeah, I’m a tough ass and have seen it all and it’s not like I’m terrified. In fact, the danger adds adrenaline. But the idea of going to jail is not appealing, even for an adrenaline junkie.

After I get into the bathroom, blowing off Roy’s remark of how perfect my mouth would look on his cock, I lock myself in and try to decide what to do. I want to bail, not just from this place, but from this lifestyle, but how do I escape the only thing I know?

“Things were so much easier when I was with Luke,” I mutter under my breath, grasping onto the edge of the bathroom counter as the truth nearly sends me to the floor. “Dammit, this is bad.” I rest my head against the mirror behind me, thinking about how Luke is here and how destiny is a real bitch, putting us together like this again. But deep down I know it’s not destiny. The probability of us ending up together like this, under the same roof, has always been high, since we both live the same risky lifestyles in the same damn town. I just wish the probability of us working out was higher. “What the hell am I going to do?” I mumble.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Go away, Roy!” I shout, knowing I’m being unprofessional, but not caring at the moment. “I’m not giving you a blowjob.”

There’s a pause. “Violet open up.” Luke’s voice floats through from the other side of the door. “It’s me… Luke.” Like he has to say his name—his damn gorgeous voice is branded into my mind for all eternity.

I raise my head up and scowl at the door. “Go away Luke.”

“No… Look, I get that you don’t want to have anything to do with me—I really do—but you’re in over your head here.”

I inch over to the door and place my hand on it, closing my eyes and picturing him on the other side doing the same thing, even though I’m sure that’s not true. But I can see him in my mind, the most intense brown eyes I’ve ever seen. His lips that I know are the softest and gentlest I’ve ever kissed. His lean arms that made me feel safe once. And it’s okay for me to picture this as long as we have a barrier between us like the door. “You don’t think I know that? I know I’m in deep shit. Trust me. I knew it the moment I walked in.”

It takes a second for him to answer. “I think you might think you know that, but you’re not walking away so… I want to help you.”

“I don’t want your help.” I open my eyes when he doesn’t respond and reach for the doorknob, figuring he did what I asked and decided to leave me alone, since he’s been good about giving me space. But when I open the door, he’s still standing on the other side and he comes barreling in without warning, forcing me back into the bathroom and then slamming the door behind us and locking it.