The Complete Dramatic Works (48 page)

[
Spots
off.
Blackout.
Five
seconds.
Spot
on
M
.]

M:
When first this change I actually thanked God. I thought, It is done, it is said,
now all is going out–

[
Spot
from
M
to
W
1.]

W1:
Mercy, mercy, tongue still hanging out for mercy. It will come. You haven’t seen
me. But you will. Then it will come.

[
Spot
from
 
W
1
to
 
W
2.]

W2:
To say I am not disappointed, no, I am. I had anticipated something better. More
restful.

[
Spot
from
 
W
2
to
 
W
1.]

W1:
Or you will weary of me.

[
Spot
from
W
1
to
 
M
.]

M:
Down, all going down, into the dark, peace is coming, I thought, after all, at last,
I was right, after all, thank God, when first this change.

[
Spot
from 
M
to
W
2.]

W2:
Less confused. Less confusing. At the same time I prefer this to … the other thing.
Definitely. There are endurable moments.

[
Spot
from
 
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
I thought.

[
Spot
from 
M
to
 
W
2.]

W2:
When you go out–and I go out. Some day you will tire of me and go out … for good.

[
Spot
from
 
W
2
to
 
W
1.]

W1:
Hellish half-light.

[
Spot
from
 
W
1 to
M
.]

M:
Peace, yes, I suppose, a kind of peace, and all that pain as if … never been.

[
Spot
from
 
M
to
 
W
2.]

W2:
Give me up, as a bad job. Go away and start poking and pecking at someone else. On
the other hand–

[
Spot
from
W
2
to
 
W
1.]

W1:
Get off me! Get off me!

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to
M
.]

M:
It will come. Must come. There is no future in this.

[
Spot
from 
M
to
W
2.]

W2:
On the other hand things may disimprove, there is that danger.

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
Oh of course I know now–

[
Spot
from
M
to 
W
1.]

W1:
Is it that I do not tell the truth, is that it, that some day somehow I may tell
the truth at last and then no more light at last, for the truth?

[
Spot
from
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
You might get angry and blaze me clean out of my wits. Mightn’t you?

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
I know now, all that was just … play. And all this? When will all this–

[
Spot from
 
M
to 
W
1.]

W1:
Is that it?

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
Mightn’t you?

[
Spot
from
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
All this, when will all this have been … just play?

[
Spot
from
M
to 
W
1.]

W1:
I can do nothing … for anybody … any more … thank God. So it must be something I
have to say. How the mind works still!

[
Spot from
 
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
But I doubt it. It would not be like you somehow. And you must know I am doing my
best. Or don’t you?

[
Spot
from 
W
2 to
M
.]

M:
Perhaps they have become friends. Perhaps sorrow–

[
Spot
from 
M
to 
W
1.]

W1:
But I have said all I can. All you let me. All I-

[
Spot
from
W
1
to
M
.]

M:
Perhaps sorrow has brought them together.

[
Spot
from 
M
to 
W
2.]

W2:
No doubt I make the same mistake as when it was the sun
that shone, of looking for sense where possibly there is none.

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to
M
.]

M:
Perhaps they meet, and sit, over a cup of that green tea they both so loved, without
milk or sugar not even a squeeze of lemon–

[
Spot
from 
M
to 
W
2.]

W2:
Are you listening to me? Is anyone listening to me? Is
anyone
looking at me? Is anyone bothering about me at all?

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
Not even a squeeze of–

[
Spot
from 
M
to
W
1.]

W1:
Is it something I should do with my face, other than utter? Weep?

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
Am I taboo, I wonder. Not necessarily, now that all danger is averted. That poor
creature–I can hear her–that poor creature–

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
W
1.]

W1:
Bite off my tongue and swallow it? Spit it out? Would that placate you? How the mind
works still to be sure!

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
M
.]

M:
Meet, and sit, now in the one dear place, now in the other, and sorrow together,
and compare–[
Hiccup.
]
pardon–happy memories.

[
Spot from
M
to
W
1.]

W1:
If only I could think, There is no sense in this … either, none whatsoever. I can’t.

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
That poor creature who tried to seduce you, what ever became of her, do you suppose?–I
can hear her. Poor thing.

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to
M
.]

M:
Personally I always preferred Lipton’s.

[
Spot
from 
M
to
W
1.]

W1:
And that all is falling, all fallen, from the beginning, on empty air. Nothing being
asked at all. No one asking me for anything at all.

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
They might even feel sorry for me, if they could see me. But never so sorry as I
for them.

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
W
1.]

W1:
I can’t.

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
Kissing their sour kisses.

[
Spot
from
W
2
to
M
.]

M:
I pity them in any case, yes, compare my lot with theirs, however blessed, and–

[
Spot
from 
M
to 
W
1.]

W1:
I can’t. The mind won’t have it. It would have to go. Yes.

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to
M
.]

M:
Pity them.

[
Spot
from
M
to
W
2.]

W2:
What do you do when you go out? Sift?

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
Am I hiding something? Have I lost–

[
Spot
from 
M
to
W
1.]

W1:
She had means, I fancy, though she lived like a pig.

[
Spot
from
W
1
to 
W
2.]

W2:
Like dragging a great roller, on a scorching day. The strain … to get it moving,
momentum coming–

[
Spot
off 
W
2.
Blackout.
Three
seconds.
Spot
on 
W
2.]

W2:
Kill it and strain again.

[
Spot
from
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
Have I lost … the thing you want? Why go out? Why go–

[
Spot
from
M
to 
W
2.]

W2:
And you perhaps pitying me, thinking, Poor thing, she needs a rest.

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to 
W
1.]

W1:
Perhaps she has taken him away to live … somewhere in the sun.

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
M
.]

M:
Why go down? Why not–

[
Spot from
 
M
to
W
2.]

W2:
I don’t know.

[
Spot
from
W
2
to 
W
1.]

W1:
Perhaps she is sitting somewhere, by the open window, her hands folded in her lap,
gazing down out over the olives–

[
Spot
from
W
1
to
M
.]

M:
Why not keep on glaring at me without ceasing? I might start to rave and–[
Hiccup.
]–bring it up for you. Par–

[
Spot
from 
M
to 
W
2.]

W2:
No.

[
Spot
from
W
2
to 
M
.]

M:
–don.

[
Spot
from 
M
to 
W
1.]

W1:
Gazing down out over the olives, then the sea, wondering what can be keeping him,
growing cold. Shadow stealing over everything. Creeping. Yes.

[
Spot
from 
W
1
to 
M
.
]

M:
To think we were never together.

[
Spot
from 
M
to
W
2.]

W2:
Am I not perhaps a little unhinged already?

[
Spot
from 
W
2
to
W
1.]