The Cowbear's Mail Order Bride (Curvy Bear Ranch 6) (10 page)

After checking the baby’s head again, she jumped up to wash her hands. She didn’t have delivery room scrubs or soap or any extra time, but she’d have to make due.

Madison puffed a few times before crying.

“Are you having contractions?” Cindy asked.

“Yes.”

“How far apart?”

“I don’t know,” Madison half-screamed. “Fast.”

“Once a minute?”

“More.”

Cindy glanced at the clock on the wall. She’d called 911 five minutes ago. There was no way they’d get here in time. She had to deliver the baby.

“I know you’re scared,” Cindy said. “But I’m going to help you through this.”

“I want Mack,” Madison snapped.

“I know. I can’t get him right now, but he’ll be here soon.”

“Ohhh,” Madison shrieked.

“Okay. As soon as you feel the next contraction start, I want you to give me four big pushes. Okay?”

Madison nodded. The stark fear in her eyes tore at Cindy’s heart. Many women were afraid of giving birth for the first time, and to have to do it on the kitchen floor had to be a nightmare come true.

“Ahhh,” Madison screeched.

“Push. Give me four big pushes,” Cindy commanded.

Sweat rolled down Madison’s face. Her muscles contorted as she strained. With her fists and forearms, she pushed herself up from the ground.

The baby’s head pushed out. One shoulder quickly followed, then the other. The rest of its body slid out quickly. Cindy caught the baby in her arms—he wasn’t breathing.

She quickly carried him to the island and laid him on a towel. After clearing his mouth and nose, she gently rubbed his back. His mouth opened and a small cry escaped. He clenched his fists and began to wail in earnest.

Cindy quickly cleaned him and wrapped a blanket around his back. She turned to the floor and laid him on Madison’s chest.

Madison cried as she held her baby for the first time.

Minutes later, Mack burst into the kitchen.

“An ambulance is here. They said you—”

His eyes went wide and the blood rushed out of his face.

“Sit down, Mack,” Cindy commanded.

She’d seen that look before in plenty of father’s faces. It didn’t matter how big and strong a man was, the second he ended up in his wife’s delivery room, he could fall apart in an instant.

Mack staggered over to his fiancée and plunked down on the floor next to her.

“Are you okay, honey?” he asked.

“Yes. Thank God Cindy found me,” she said. “I tried to get to the phone, but I fell.”

Cody and Brady ran into the room. Two paramedics followed closely behind.

“Everyone step back,” the first paramedic commanded.

Cindy backed up until her lower back hit the edge of the counter. She held her blood-covered hands at chest height. The shock of the situation finally washed over her. She’d just delivered her first baby outside of a hospital.

Logan and Hank stood in the doorway between the kitchen and the dining room. Their faces were almost as pale as Mack’s. Kate, Carol, and Abby filtered in behind them. Rachel wasn’t there, which was good because this wasn’t something Jimmy needed to see.

The paramedics placed Madison on a stretcher. They let her hold the baby as they wheeled her out. Madison smiled weakly and mouthed, “Thank you.”

Cindy smiled in response.

Drew stumbled past the stretcher and into the kitchen.

“What the hell happened?” he asked.

“Cindy just delivered Madison’s baby,” Brady said.

“She did?” Drew asked.

“Yep,” Cody said. “She’s a badass.”

“I’m a bloody badass,” she said.

Drew frowned at her crimson hands. “Let’s get you upstairs for a bath.”

“Thanks for delivering my nephew,” Logan said. “I’d hug you but…”

Kate stepped in. “We’ll clean the kitchen. Don’t worry about anything right now, just go upstairs and relax.”

As Drew led her out of the room, the other brothers and their mates began grabbing mops and towels. It wasn’t until they were upstairs in her bedroom that the avalanche of emotions she’d been holding back were unleashed.

Chapter 10

Drew pulled her into his arms.

“My hands. The blood,” she stammered.

“Shh. I got you,” he whispered.

He stroked her back as she sobbed against his chest. His bear wanted to come out and wrap her in a huge hug, but that would only scare her. Fortunately, the creature understood why he couldn’t be released.

“Let’s get you into a bath,” he said.

“Oh, no. I ruined your shirt.” She pulled back to study the dark splotches on his chest.

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “During cattle birthing season, my shirts go through much worse.”

When she wrinkled her nose, he smiled. He released her and walked into the bathroom. As he leaned over to run the bath, she began to unbutton her shirt. He tested the stream of water and adjusted it until it was hot, but not scalding. He opened the cabinet under the sink and took out a bottle of bubble bath. After pouring a few drops into the water, he capped the bottle and returned it to the sink.

“If you need me to adjust the—” His jaw dropped.

Cindy stood in the center of the bathroom, completely naked. Other than the splotches of blood on her hands, she was stunning. Black hair cascaded across her shoulders. Pale peach skin glistened in the light. The rosy tips of her breasts formed enticing peaks.

“You’re staring,” she whispered.

“I…Um.” Heat rushed into his cheeks. It took a lot to strike him speechless, but apparently her naked perfection had been enough.

“The tub looks big enough for two,” she said after scrubbing her hands in the sink.

She didn’t have to ask him twice. He stripped off his shirt and pants and set them on the counter along with her clothes. As he walked toward the bath, she stepped into it. She sat forward, giving him room to slide in behind her.

He didn’t bother trying to hide his growing erection as he pulled her back against him. She had to know how much he wanted her already. But if she hadn't, she knew now.

After wrapping his arms around her waist, he kissed the back of her shoulder. She sighed and leaned against him.

“Thank you for helping Madison,” he said.

“I’m just glad I was here. She had to be terrified. I didn’t think she was that far along. I thought she met Mack in December.”

“It’s complicated,” he said.

He couldn’t exactly explain the unpredictable gestation period of werebears, not yet at least. That would be a hell of a conversation, one that they would need to have if she really was his mate. But that could wait. She shivered in his arms. The adrenaline of the situation hadn’t fully dissipated yet.

He picked up a fluffy tan sponge and dipped it in the water. As he brushed it across her shoulders, he sighed. She hadn’t been the only one keeping secrets. He had his own that he’d have to reveal if they decided to move forward together. Was he really any better than her? He’d lied about his fundamental makeup. But he couldn’t even think about broaching that subject with someone who wasn’t his fated mate. The Yellowstone werebears had spent decades hiding their true natures. They’d managed to stay safe by keeping their bear selves secret. He couldn’t tell her. Not yet.

Cindy’s shoulders trembled. She sniffed a few times before reaching up to wipe tears from her face.

“Hey,” he murmured. “What’s going on?”

“I’m just so lost. I came here thinking that I was going to meet the man of my dreams only to find out it’s all a lie. And then I met you. And I…I’m not ready to leave. I just wish I knew where I stood with you,” she said.

“I want to trust you, I do. But I’ve been burned before,” he said. “I don’t know what it will take for me to make that leap.”

“I don’t know how to make you trust me.”

“I know.” He pressed his face into her hair. “I know.”

She turned half-way toward him. A thin layer of bubbles covered the swell of her breasts. He groaned. Why did she have to be so damn sexy?

“What will it take?” she asked. “What can I do to show you how much I need you?”

His cock swelled against the curve of her butt. Getting into the bath with her had been a huge mistake. How could he possibly think straight with her naked, soft body pressed against him?

“I know you want me.” She placed her hand on the top of his thigh. “So what are you waiting for?”

“It can’t just be sex,” he choked as he struggled to retain the last thread of self-control. “I want a partnership with someone. I want someone who loves me for who I am. Someone who can see my faults and not judge me for having them.”

“I want that too,” she said.

She slid one leg around his waist, then the other. As she eased forward into his lap, he clamped his jaw shut. God, she was going to kill him. How could he resist her when she was wrapped around him like that?

“Cindy,” he whispered. He reached up to brush a lock of damp hair out of her eyes. “You’ve been through a lot today. I don’t want you to come to me because you’re hurting, or scared. I want you to come to me because you want
me
. A flawed, reclusive cowboy who would rather spend all day in a paddock than in a house surrounded by people.”

“But I do want you.” She slid her hands around his neck and drew him closer. “I’ve wanted you from the moment I met you. And I don’t mean, the fake, online version of you. I mean the real you.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he said.

“Then don’t make me wait.”

As she brushed her mouth across his, a jolt of yearning shot straight to his core. He didn’t just want to possess her body. He wanted to possess her heart and soul. And he couldn’t do that until he confessed his own secret. But as her lips urged him into a deeper kiss, his resolve melted faster than a patch of snow in spring. He could worry about telling her everything later. Right now, he didn’t want to focus on anything except the feel of her in his arms.

When she reached between them to wrap her fist around his cock, his hips jerked involuntarily. He’d never wanted anyone the way he wanted her. No other woman could unleash such overwhelming passion. He couldn’t get enough of her lips, of the smoothness of her skin, or of her scent—pure and floral, like a summer meadow.

He tangled his hands in her hair, pulling her tightly against him. She rode up higher on his lap, shifting her knees until they rested on either side of his thighs. As she straddled him, he devoured the damp skin along the side of her neck. He cupped her full breasts and brought them to his lips. After lavishing them with kisses, he sucked one plump nipple, then the other.

She used her hand to guide him into her slick heat. As she wrapped around him, he gasped. He held her hips, gently guiding her into a slow rhythm that sent water sloshing over the edge of the tub. He’d clean the mess up later. It wouldn’t be the only mess he’d have to clean up later and he knew it. But he didn’t care. Nothing mattered except her. They fit together as if they’d been made for each other.

As she leaned back, he rocked up to meet her. Gentle, rhythmic waves of pleasure rose up from the base of his spine. Energy tingled and built in ever increasing pulses until he growled with need.

She tossed her head with abandon, riding him with an unrestrained wildness that made his bear roar with joy. Her head dropped forward onto his shoulder. She arched and bucked and rocked until she moaned his name.

As she squeezed and pulsed around him, she screamed. He crushed his lips against her, swallowing her cries until his own cries of release melded with hers to form a perfect harmony. He shuddered as he came harder than he’d ever come in his life. Every last drop of energy spilled into her until he had nothing left.

Completely satisfied, he lay back, cradling her against his chest. He loved the sensation of being inside her. She was his in every way that mattered. In his heart, he knew, without a doubt, that they belonged together. But his mind kept getting in the way. He couldn’t stop thinking about how she’d lied to him over and over. It was something he was having a hard time forgiving and he wasn’t sure what it would take to move past it.

***

Cindy lay in the circle of his arms in the center of the bed. She snuggled up against him until every inch of her was enveloped by him. The way he could completely cover her with his body made her feel safer than she’d felt in a year. If she ended up staying with Drew, she’d never have to worry about being alone again. She’d be able to bring her daughter to a ranch where she could grow up around good people. Everything would be perfect. Too bad she wasn’t any closer to that point now than she’d been the previous day.

As she sighed, he pulled her closer. She rolled so that her butt spooned up against his hips. His arm draped across her waist, giving her a great view of his huge hand. They were the biggest hands she’d ever seen, but they didn’t look strange when you took into account his size. He towered over her by at least a foot. But unlike the lumberjack-type, he didn’t lumber around like a hulking beast.

“What are you thinking?” he whispered, startling her.

“I didn’t realize you were still awake,” she said.

“I can’t sleep with you wiggling your butt like that.”

“I’m not wiggling,” she said with a smile as she ground against his semi-erect cock. God, did the man ever go soft? Ever?

“If you want more, all you have to do is ask,” he growled in her ear.

“Aren’t you tired?” she asked.

“No. I could do this for hours.”

“You’ve done it for hours.”

“Mmm…” he nuzzled the back of her earlobe.

She rolled slowly toward him. As she gazed into his hazel eyes, they shimmered in the late afternoon light.

“We’ve been in bed for hours. Your brothers are going to wonder what we’re up to,” she said.

“I’m sure they know what we’re doing,” he teased.

She laced her fingers in his and brought them up to her lips. As she kissed each knuckle, she struggled with how to ask him what was really on her mind.

“I’m not ready,” he said.

She stilled, knowing exactly what he meant.

“What will it take?” she asked softly.

“I don’t know. Usually I’m so sure of everything. But this… I wasn’t even looking for a mate.”

“I know,” she said. “I wish we’d met some other way. I think it would have made things a lot easier.”

He stroked the edge of her arm before raising up to kiss her shoulder. As he slowly turned her toward him, she pressed her face against his chest. She fought to keep tears from spilling down her cheeks.

“Hold me,” she murmured.

He pulled her against him and dragged a blanket over both of them. She hated crying, but couldn’t help it. The stress of the last year had been too much. She couldn’t take it anymore and so she cried until she fell asleep in his arms.

Hours later, she woke to an empty bed. She stared out the window at the cold moon. Fresh tears clung to her lashes. Her heart ached for him. After the hell she’d been through with her ex, she vowed never to fall in love again. And what had she done? Exactly that.

She was completely, utterly, hopelessly in love with him and was powerless to make him love her back. But a small piece of her heart held out hope that he loved her too. Maybe he really was just afraid of letting anyone get close to him. He’d never talked about his past relationships, so she didn’t know if another woman had broken his heart.

Regardless, if she lost him now, she’d never recover. Of course her traitorous heart had chosen an emotionally unavailable man. She’d never been lucky in love, so why start now?

As a fresh wave of self-pity consumed her, she shook it off. She’d been perfectly capable of taking care of herself the last year. She didn’t need him. If he didn’t want her, then her heart would heal and she’d move on.

She rolled away from the window. Sure, maybe she would heal, but if she lost Drew, she’d never attempt to love another man again. The heartache wasn’t worth it. Maybe fate was telling her that she would end up an old maid, alone with fifty cats and an endless pile of sewing projects.

The image of her with gray hair surrounded by an army of cats was too much. She didn’t want to laugh, but she couldn’t help it. The first peal of laughter led to another and another until she’d curled up into a ball, hysterically laughing. She rolled onto her back and clutched her belly. Oh, God. Too funny.

But the laughter was short lived. She didn’t want to end up old and alone. Especially when she had a chance with someone like Drew. She could lie to everyone in the world about who she was and where she’d come from, but she couldn’t lie to herself. She’d fallen completely in love with him. If she lost him now, she’d be devastated. She’d never recover. She had to find a way to make him see that they belonged together. But how?

The door cracked open. She tangled herself up in the sheets as she tried to sit up. Drew strolled into the room. He carried a tray with two plates on it.

“You’re awake,” he said. “Can I turn on the light?”

“Sure.”

After he flicked it on, she blinked a few times. Clad only in a pair of jeans, his bare chest clenched as he set the tray on the bed.