The Cries of the Butterfly - A LOVE STORY (26 page)

Now, as she brushed her teeth this Saturday morning, Savannah uttered a little moan. All her life she had hankered for a family of her own. Now she was getting a dose that overwhelmed her. Wolf was only one person. There was so much more. In Grant, she’d begun to see a father, and in Estelle, a mother. Parents she never had. Parents she had so badly yearned for all her life. In Art, she had begun to see an older brother, a brother she never had. In Olivia, she had seen a sister for sure, a sister she had never had since Mary’s death many years ago. A sister with who she could share anything, a sister she could get naughty with, a sister she could play cards with (and they had played—just the two of them—for two hours non-stop last evening). And perhaps in Rochelle she would one day also see a sister. Savannah couldn’t believe this was happening to her. It was beyond magical.

When she came out of the washroom, there were tears in her heart all over again. Lianne was sitting on the bed, ardently reading the ‘Tribune’, and Savannah hastily rearranged her face to show normalcy.

Lianne looked up and there was a wide grin on her face.

“Jesus of Christ, you’re a big, big star! Look!” she exclaimed, handing Savannah the rag.

Savannah took the paper. As she had expected, her picture was splashed on the front page, as big and colorful as Wolf’s had been the other day.

The New Halcyon Tribune Exclusive

Finally The Cat Is Out Of The Bag

We Give You Wolf Butcher’s Mysterious Bride

Savannah sighed. She had immediately sounded Wolf the other day after her pictures had been clicked, and after being initially upset, he had shrugged. She began reading the rest of the text and guess what? They didn’t know anything else about her—not even her name, and Savannah felt better. Well, at least Wolf wouldn’t be too disappointed.

Lianne was shaking her head in awe and wonderment, as if she were looking at a royal.

“So what you say, pretty lady?” she said, her eyes twinkling. “Should I now sort-of start calling you ‘Your Royal Highness’. Or shall it be ‘Your Majesty’?”

Savannah gave her a cold killer look. She turned and went to the window and looked out.

And immediately her mind turned back to her new family—to Grant, to Estelle, to Art, to Olivia…to the most beautiful and wonderful people in the whole wide world.
My people. My family.

And then suddenly, utterly out of nowhere, she was gripped by anguish.

A deep stirring began in her core.

This isn’t right!
a voice from within cried.
You can’t go ahead with this. You
shouldn’t
go ahead with it.
It was a churning that greatly disturbed her.

She immediately tried to dismiss it, to smother it.

But the voice persisted, growing stronger now, demanding to be heard.

Call this marriage off. It would be a massive fraud on the family that has showered you, a complete stranger, with so much love and affection, who has embraced you so unconditionally. Yes, Wolf has accepted you, but what about the rest of them? They know nothing about your true identity. You’d be breaching their trust, violating their very essence by going into that house…

The telephone rang then and she gave a little startled jolt.

“Savannah?” Wolf demanded. “What in hell are you still doing there? Why aren’t you here yet?”

“I’ll be there soon.”

“The chauffeur’s there, right?”

“What? …You sent one?”

“Of course…what do you mean?”

Savannah looked sharply at Lianne. Lianne smacked her head.
Oh, I forgot to tell you. He’s waiting downstairs by the car,
she whispered guiltily. Savannah gave her another killer look.

“Okay, I’ll be there shortly,” she said into the phone.

“I want you here this very second!” he slammed. “I’m dying here without you. Can’t breathe, can’t eat, can’t drink, can’t freaking live! I need you, woman…real bad. In half an hour?”

She giggled. “Make it an hour. I still have to shower.”

“Haven’t you done that yet? Filthy pig!” And he cut the line.

As Savannah stripped off and went under the water, the turmoil returned…and the joy she had woken up with was gone like fickle smoke.

Don’t do it to them…they don’t deserve it. Think of Grant and Estelle at least. The warmth and the respect they have given you. … It’s not too late, call it off.

And yet, she so badly wanted to be a part of that family.
So, so badly
… She felt a headache begin to form, and the water dropping on her cranium now felt like a shower of stones.

A half hour later, Savannah finally started for Butcher Garden.

The headache had quickly soared, stuffing her skull. The pain had become so excruciating that she had popped in a Rubfen-600. When that hadn’t worked, she had downed one more. At length, her head had yielded some, but it felt dull and leaden. Finally, she decided she would tell them the truth. She owed it to them—
it is that simple
. She wasn’t simply marrying Wolf, she was practically marrying the whole Butcher family, a family of matchless class and repute. If she wasn’t honest with them, she would find no peace with herself. Day in and day out her inner self would chew on her, until slowly she was completely eaten away.

If they accepted her despite everything, she would remain indebted to them all her life. But in case they rejected her, she would walk away gracefully.

She reached Butcher Garden twenty-five minutes later and she squirmed and began ducking when she saw the crowd, mostly Press people.
Mary!
But there was no point in it—they already knew her face. The mass converged as her car neared the main-gate and it was a melee. Flashlights began going off and there was thumping on the drawn windows, and people even tried to yank the doors open. Savannah bent forward and hid her face between her knees.
Dammit, isn’t this supposed to be the President’s residence?
She could hear the chauffeur cursing in the front. But the police and the security personnel quickly broke through the crowd and began pushing the Press dogs back.

“These rotten bastards…they’d sell their daughters to get a pic!” the chauffeur was muttering under his breath.

Olivia was waiting when the car stopped in front of the house.

The two women hugged.

“Wow, you’re quite a star, aren’t you? You’re more famous than even my brother,” Olivia said.

Savannah blushed.

And then Estelle appeared. “There you are!” she cried, rushing over. “We’ve been waiting for you for ages.” She grabbed Savannah’s arms and the two women mashed cheeks. “You should have stayed back last night. How many times I asked you to, but you just wouldn’t heed. There are a million spare bedrooms here. Next time…”

“Ma, now let it be!” Olivia beseeched.

.

I
t was an hour before Savannah finally got to be alone with Wolf.

“There’s something I have to tell you,” she said, her face solemn.

“Shoot.”

“I’ve decided to tell them…about myself…my past.”

“Sweet shit, have you lost it?” He was genuinely shocked.

“I can’t deceive them, Wolf. Not after the way they’ve been with me.”

“Don’t be mad! You’ll spoil everything this way.”

“Look, Wolf, I understand your point. But please understand where I’m coming from too: if I don’t tell them now, there’s no way I’ll ever be able to find any peace with myself.” She looked steadfastly into his eyes. Then she let go with all the arguments she’d been making to herself. And she concluded, “There’s no way I can betray these people. Just no way.” Her eyes became slightly moist.

Wolf turned away and stared at the opposite wall.

A silence ensued.

It was terminated by a knock on the door.

Wolf answered it, while Savannah turned her face away and quickly composed herself.

It was Grant.

“Where is my girl?” he demanded of Wolf. “Oh, there she is.”

He went over and took her in his arms and kissed her head.

“I waited for you all morning. Then I had to go to the office. Pressing business,” he said apologetically. “This Presidentship is a tough business.”

“That’s alright, sir.” Savannah babbled, thinking why he needed to explain himself.

“Everything fine?” he asked her, flinging a suspicious glance at Wolf.

“Yes, sir, fine…everything.” She forced a broader smile.

“If this man troubles you, you come to me, right?” he told Savannah. “He may be a big star to the world. But in this house, he is just my son and he shall listen to me.”

Wolf put his arms up innocently.

“And I have a request for you,” Grant added.

“Anything, sir,” Savannah said earnestly.

“That is exactly it—please do not call me ‘sir’. I do not like my family addressing me that way. Call me
Uncle Grant
, or better still, call me
Dad.
I would love nothing more than that.”

Savannah pressed her lips. “Yes, sir…I mean, Uncle Grant.”

“Not
Dad
yet? Okay, maybe in time.” And he patted her cheek and turned to leave. He looked back from the door. “Lunch in ten minutes. The full family is eating together. So be there in time.”

When Grant had gone, Wolf shut the door and turned to Savannah.

“Do you still want to tell them? Do you still want to shock them and hurt them and break their hearts? They’ll be devastated beyond words,” he said. She looked down. “Sometimes, secrets of the past are best kept in the past. Sometimes, there is virtue in a little dishonesty.”

There was truth in what he was saying. And yet…

Wolf added, “There is no reason why they should know what happened back then, for in no way does it affect them, or anyone else. So why unnecessarily bring it up?”

She looked up. Her eyes were suddenly very tired.

***

Robin
just couldn’t sleep this Saturday night.

She was just too euphoric for it. Come morning and Dad and Mom would get married.
Then…Monday!
Happiness swept through her like a gentle flame and she wanted to jump in the air.

She had to get out of the dorm—it felt too suffocating right now. The room was dark and although everyone else was asleep, there were eleven other girls around and Robin needed to be alone, at least for a while. Her heart was overflowing and she needed free air.

“Hey, Stripey, wake up, I say. I’m going to the terrace,” she whispered.

He quickly snapped out of his slumber and leapt on her.

Robin looked at Moon-Moon, sleeping on the top deck of their bed. As usual, her head was tilted forward so her chin touched her chest. As usual, her thumb was securely in her mouth. A deep sadness formed in Robin’s chest. If someone asked her one reason why she wouldn’t want to leave here and go to Daddy, it would be this best friend of hers.
If only I can take Moon-Moon with me. Why can’t Dad and Mom have her as their daughter as well?
Then Robin would have a sister too. That would complete her happiness. Robin finally decided she would talk to Daddy about it once she had settled down in her new home.

She stood looking at her dear friend for a long time, badly wanting to pull her thumb out of her mouth (how often had Sister Toynette scolded Moon-Moon over the bad practice—but the habit never went away). Robin was startled to find drops of water drip down her chin and she realized she was weeping quietly. She turned away and now walked out of the room.

Reaching the terrace, she took a deep breath and felt the air spread its joy through her lungs. She looked at the sky and she threw her arm up.
Oh, if only I could fly
…if only she could become a butterfly,
if only for just a while
. This was another thing she was going to miss badly. This terrace, which she had made her very own, where she had spent countless secret hours at nights raising Stripey and Naughty. The thought of Naughty made her sad again.

She looked at Stripey, moving about with that typical squirrel curiosity, stopping at the smallest object and twitching his nose for any smell. Robin smiled. He was her little son and she loved him so much. Now shortly, he would get complete freedom at the new home.
Oh, so nice!

Robin’s right arm accidentally hit the parapet as she turned. A shaft of pain shot up to her shoulder and she grimaced. For a second, she bent over, then rubbed the stub vigorously. Although she had got used to it, it was often very inconvenient to have just one functional arm. But soon that was going to be corrected. Daddy had said she would be having an artificial arm as soon as she came to stay with him and she really looked forward to it. She wondered how it would feel, how it would work.
Well, I’ll soon find out,
she told herself, with sudden thrill.

She spent over an hour, luxuriating in the night air, fantasizing about her new home, and of Daddy and Mommy, and Grandpa, and all the others, trying to block Moon-Moon out and the pain that separation from her would bring. She thought of the one more friend she would have in another two days—Bruno, whom she had come to really like. He was a big, ferocious dog, but with her he was always so very gentle and loving. She especially loved his sloppy kisses on her face. She recalled the other day: she had been playing with Stripey in the back garden, when suddenly Bruno had appeared out of nowhere and headed straight for Stripey who was on her shoulder then. Robin had frozen in utter terror…as had Stripey. But instead, Bruno had merely stared at the little chipmunk for a moment, then sniffed him some, and finally given him a delicate little lick…instinctively understanding that the squirrel was with Robin, hence
one of us
and therefore not to be harmed. Robin had felt a huge gush of affection for the large Alsatian and she had spontaneously given him an almighty hug, almost throwing him to the ground. Oh, how could she not love this beautiful, beautiful friend?