The Crushes (21 page)

Rule 32:
Do not act shy, speechless, or tongue-tied around your crush!

Less than twenty-four hours after that misguided kiss, Blake called Raven and said they had to “talk.” Which couldn’t be good. Yesterday, on the ride back home, Blake hadn’t said a word to Raven. She couldn’t tell if he was angry or sad or confused.

She was still having a hard time reading him and now he sat across the table from her at a nearby Starbucks.

With the milk steamer whistling in the background and the smell of ground coffee beans thick in the air, it almost felt like Raven was at Scrappe. She half-expected Horace to walk up and that would be bad. Really bad, considering Raven was having a hard time focusing on anything but Blake right now.

She knew it was wrong, but she wanted to kiss him again. And maybe part of the reason why kissing him was so exciting was because she knew she wasn’t supposed to.

Still, she was ninety-four percent certain she’d never do it again. The guilt was a heavy weight in her gut because she loved Horace and she knew, deep down, she was better off with him than with Blake.

It’d been stupid to kiss him. She’d just gotten caught up in the excitement.

“So,” Blake began, holding his coffee cup between both hands, “we need to talk about what happened yesterday.”

Raven nodded and took a sip from her frappé. They weren’t as good as the ones they made at Scrappe.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Blake went on, “I like you. I really like you and that kiss…” He ran his hand over his hair. “The kiss was rad, but I love Lana and I can’t hurt her like that.”

Raven nodded. She was having a hard time getting anything out.

“So we agree that the kiss was a mistake?” he asked.

Raven liked the kiss and if she were single, she’d want to have more kisses between them, but right now, with their situation, it
was
a mistake. “Yes,” she finally said.

Blake let out a relieved breath. “Are you going to tell Horace?”

Knots twisted in Raven’s stomach. What if he broke up with her? What if he told her he never wanted to see her again? She couldn’t live with it. She couldn’t live with knowing she’d hurt Horace like that.

And was it so wrong for her to keep the kiss a secret? It was just one kiss, and like Blake said, it was a mistake.

“No,” she answered, “I don’t think I’ll tell him.”

Blake turned toward the windows, the sunlight playing over his face. “Yeah, I don’t think I’ll tell Lana, either.” He
glanced at her then, his voice having gone low. “How about we let that secret die here, then?”

Raven nodded. “Agreed.”

When Raven came home later that evening, she found her mother waiting for her at the kitchen table.

“What were you thinking?” Mrs. Valenti shouted.

Raven froze. She didn’t need clarification; she knew exactly what her mother was referring to. Somehow she’d found out about the trip to New York. How, exactly, Raven couldn’t begin to guess. Had Jordan said something?

“Um…” Heat fluttered in her face. Raven hated feeling caught like this. She wasn’t sure where to begin.

“Well,” she said, “I guess I was thinking that I wanted to compete in a singing contest. And it was only in New York.”

Mrs. Valenti gritted her teeth. Her nostrils flared. “I can’t believe you went to the city by yourself, Raven! And for a silly contest! You could have gone there to visit a college, but no, you had to sneak off for music.”

Raven clenched her hands into fists at her side. “Horace and I thought it’d be a good opportunity. You know…something to get me out of Birch Falls, something to make me successful like you always wanted.”

Mrs. Valenti sighed, rubbing at her forehead. “I never should have called Horace…”

Raven frowned. “What? When did you call Horace?”

Her mother stared straight ahead, her lips pursed tightly.

“Mom?”

“I called him when he was in Detroit.”

Raven widened her eyes, her lower jaw dropped. “You what?”

“I was doing it for you, honey. I just want you to have a good life. I don’t want you to regret anything and sticking around Birch Falls for a boy and a garage band…well, that’s not exactly the kind of life I want you to have.”

Raven was speechless. That’s why Horace had been acting so weird since he got home from Detroit, why he’d pushed her into the contest—because her mother had called him and planted ideas in his head, because he’d been afraid of holding Raven back.

“I cannot believe you did that,” Raven said.

“It wasn’t like I threatened him. I just wanted to discuss with him what he wanted for his future. And yours. We both think you have talent, but I want you to have a backup plan, Raven. When I was your age…”

She licked her lips, shifted in the chair at the kitchen table. “When I was your age, I thought I had all the answers, but I didn’t and I didn’t plan ahead like I should have. And it took me a long time to do what I wanted to do with my life. I don’t want you following someone else’s ideas or dreams.”

Mrs. Valenti was silent for a long time, then, “I loved your father, don’t get me wrong, but he wanted different things in life than I did. I was young and optimistic. I figured I had all the time in the world to follow his dreams and mine. But that wasn’t the case. We just followed
his
dreams and mine were shoved to the back burner for good.

“That’s why I’ve pushed you girls so hard. I want you to have everything you’ve ever dreamed of. I don’t want you to sacrifice anything for anyone.”

Raven grabbed the musical note necklace Horace had given her. She rubbed the cool silver between her fingers as she let her mother’s explanation settle in.

Finally she took in a deep breath and said, “I get what you’re saying, Mom, but this dream of going off to an Ivy League university, that’s your dream, not mine. I love to sing and that’s what I want to do.”

She stilled, waiting for the wrath of her mother, for a lecture of how irresponsible it would be for Raven to skip college.

But the lecture never came.

Instead, her mother stood up. She crossed her arms over her chest, went to the window looking out over the backyard. “I think I see that now.” She turned to Raven, cocked her head to the side. “If that’s what you want, if you’re one hundred percent sure, then I support you.”

Raven raised her brow. “Really?”

Her mother reached over, grabbed her hand, and squeezed. “Really.”

Raven dropped the music note pendant. Was this really her mother? Maybe it was an alien, because she wasn’t acting like her mother.

“Listen,” Raven said, “I have an idea.”

“I’m listening.”

“How about if I take a year off to do what I want to do. Whether that’s music or a road trip, whatever. I’ll take a year off and then, if nothing has come of the music, I’ll apply to some colleges.”

Mrs. Valenti grinned. “I think that’s a smart plan that pleases everyone. I just…you know…I want you to have a backup plan.”

“I know.”

“Sounds like a good deal,” Mrs. Valenti said. “I’m fine with it.”

When Raven had walked inside the house and her mother had yelled at her, she was certain this argument would rival a dogfight. It turned out, the conversation was one of the better ones Raven had had with her mother in a long time. And at least she wasn’t grounded.

“By the way,” her mother said, “you’re grounded.”

Raven exhaled loudly. “I was wondering when you were going to say that. For how long?”

“A long time.”

“Well, I guess I’ll have plenty of time to fine-tune my singing voice, then.”

Mrs. Valenti gave Raven a hug. “By the way,” she said, “I heard you singing at work, and I thought you sounded good.”

Raven smiled. Coming from her mother, that meant a lot.

Rule 1:
Be playful, fun, and flirty! Boys like girls who know how to have a good time!

The number one rule of the Crush Code was to be playful, fun, and flirty. The good thing was, when Kelly was with Drew, she didn’t even have to
try
to be fun. Drew automatically brought out the fun side in her.

And what was the point of flirting when she could just kiss him?

She gave her bedroom door a shove, wrapped her arms around him, and planted her mouth on his.

“Mmm,” Drew muttered against her lips, then, “Shouldn’t I be the one kissing you today? It is your birthday, after all.”

“Right,” she said, “which means I get to kiss you whenever I want. And
do
whatever I want.”

He grinned and took off his glasses, setting those neon blue eyes on Kelly. “I’ll be more than happy to let you do whatever you want.”

A dog whined from behind Drew.

“Aww,” Kelly said, ducking down to Bear’s level. The husky sat quietly on his hind legs, his tail swishing over the carpet. Drew had brought him over because, according to Drew, Bear wanted to wish Kelly a happy birthday before the party. Now, unfortunately, the dog had to go home.

It was so cute.

“Are we ready?” Kelly asked, scratching the dog beneath the chin.

Bear barked.

Kelly slipped on her pink flip-flops. “Birthday party, here I come.”

Tonight was proving to be the best night of her life.

Drew turned his truck down an unmarked road and the woods instantly swallowed them up. Todd had wanted to have Kelly’s party at Matt Turner’s barn, but Kelly had quickly vetoed that. The abandoned barn had no bathroom, which meant she’d be using the woods and Kelly really didn’t feel like going au naturel.

Somehow, Todd had talked their parents into renting part of the park on the east side of Garver Lake. The slot they had was tucked back in the woods and down a long gravel drive. It was secluded enough that the party’s music wouldn’t bother anyone else.

Drew pulled onto the grass on the side of the road and parked in a row of five other cars. Todd was already there with Adam, Kenny, and Matt, but judging by the group
beneath the pavilion, a few people had carpooled. There were at least twelve guys.

Kelly and Drew got out, loading their arms with supplies. When they reached the pavilion, Kelly pulled off her sunglasses and looked around. Gold Christmas lights hung from the rafters and wove around hot-pink streamers. Pink and gold balloons floated from weights on several of the picnic tables.

“It’s so pretty!” she exclaimed and lunged at Drew with a hug. “Thank you.” She pulled away quickly when she got the urge to kiss him. She didn’t want her brother finding out about her and Drew. At least not yet, and certainly not on her birthday. Kelly wasn’t sure how he’d react, but she didn’t want any drama at her party.

Kelly went to her brother next to give him a thank-you hug. Todd grimaced, but managed to mutter, “You’re welcome,” before pulling away from her and patting her back.

As the guys broke away to finish a few last-minute things, Kelly went over to Adam. He looked more than hot today in a pair of cargo shorts and a black T-shirt. The sleeves of his shirt definitely showed off his muscles.

It would have been so much easier if Kelly had fallen for him this summer. Part of her regretted not trying harder. If she were with him, there wouldn’t be the risk of losing a best friend. Or alienating all of her other friends.

“Happy Birthday,” Adam said, wrapping her in a hug. “You look good today.”

She glanced down at her cut-off jean shorts and white baby tee. “Thanks to you. I’ve lost about fifteen pounds this summer because of kickboxing.”

“Well, you did great at the lessons.”

“Yeah.” She looked over her shoulder for Drew. He and Todd were plugging in more Christmas lights.

“So,” Adam said, “you guys are together finally?”

Kelly blushed and looked down at the concrete floor. “Yeah, but please don’t say anything. We haven’t told anyone yet.”

“When are you going to tell people?”

Kelly shrugged. “Just not today.”

“Secret is safe with me,” Adam said.

She gave him another hug and whispered in his ear, “You and Drew are the best things that happened to me this summer.”

Raven parked along a row of cars and got out, tugging down the hem of her skirt and then straightening her loose gray tunic. She had to promise years of servitude to get her mother to lift the grounding restrictions for one night. She’d be working at Scrappe without pay until she was eighty.

Dropping her keys in her shoulder bag, Raven headed down the gravel drive to the main part of the park. Kelly had told her the party was starting at seven. Raven was only twenty minutes late, but already the park was crowded with clusters of cliques.

Kelly had always had a knack for befriending just about everyone. She belonged to no clique at school, but she had friends in almost every circle.

Music blasted from a stereo system hidden in the enclosed food area. A song by the rock band A Mighty Saint
finished up as Raven neared. A Kay-J song replaced the rock. Raven smiled to herself.

She was still having a hard time believing she’d met Kay-J in person. Raven hadn’t heard the contest results yet, but she would be content with either answer. If she were rejected, she still had Horace and the band. She’d be more than happy sticking with them.

Speaking of Horace…

He stood by the brick fire pit near the lake’s edge. Dean and Hobbs were there poking the fire with sticks as if it were some feral animal.

When Horace saw her, he nodded. Raven hurried over, kissing him eagerly. Being grounded sucked, but it did make the heart grow fonder.

“Dudes!” Hobbs said. “Get a room.”

Raven chuckled as she pulled away. “I’m so happy to see you.”

“Me, too.” Horace smiled. “Your friends here yet?”

Raven scanned the crowd. “I’m sure they are. Mind if I go look for them?”

“No. That’s fine. I’ll be here with Dean and Hobbs.” He kissed her quickly on the cheek before she broke away from the fire pit, heading for the pavilion. Beneath the roof, Raven looked up at the twinkling gold lights and pink streamers. Balloons bobbed over the picnic tables. There was a table near the back, covered in presents.

“Raven!” Alexia called, waving above the crowd.

Alexia looked absolutely adorable in a pair of longer khaki shorts and a chocolate-colored blouse. Her hair was half pulled back in a barrette and the rest hung around her shoulders.

“I’m so glad your mom let you come,” Alexia said over the music. “How long do you have tonight?”

“Midnight.”

“Me, too.”

“Are you still grounded?” Raven asked.

Alexia shrugged. “My parents aren’t home as much as they were. They finally found a new office, and they’re remodeling a lot.”

“That’s cool.”

Alexia nodded. “It’s given me a little more time to hang out with Ben before he leaves.”

“Have you talked to him about that?”

Alexia frowned and shook her head. “It’s been so much easier not thinking about it.”

“You’ll have to confront it soon. Isn’t he leaving in a few days?”

“Six, to be exact, but I really don’t want to think about it tonight. I’d rather just enjoy the party.”

Raven could understand that.

“Is Sydney here yet?” she asked.

Alexia shook her head. “She’s coming soon, though.”

“What about Kelly? Where is she? I wanted to wish her a happy birthday.”

“I think she’s in the enclosed eating area. I’ll come over there with you.”

They left the pavilion and walked over to the eating area. It was a long building with two large openings on each side. Picnic tables made two neat rows, their tops covered in pink tablecloths. There were bowls of chips and tubs of dip. There were ten different bottles of soda and a cooler full of chilled bottled water.

Kelly was in the corner unwrapping napkins and chatting with Drew.

“Happy birthday, birthday girl!” Raven called, raising her hand in the air as she navigated around the guys setting up more food.

“Hey, Ray!” Kelly said, dropping the napkins on a table.

Raven gave Kelly a hug. She smelled like vanilla and strawberries. She looked thinner, too. Had she been spending more time with that Adam guy? The hot personal trainer? Maybe Raven needed a hot personal trainer.

No, no she didn’t. She didn’t need any more guys in her life. Horace was enough for her. She hadn’t told him about the Blake incident. That was a secret better left unsaid, right?

Raven hadn’t seen Blake since their talk at Starbucks. There was a skating tour going on across the United States. She was pretty sure she wouldn’t see him for the rest of the summer. He’d texted her a few times to ask how she was and whether or not she’d heard from Kay-J.

Raven was still attracted to him, but she wasn’t afraid of that attraction anymore. She could deal with digging another guy while keeping her hands to herself. It wouldn’t be that hard. Especially when she had a guy like Horace.

“Is there anything we can help with?” Alexia asked, fidgeting with the hem of her shirt.

“Yeah.” Kelly nodded at the napkins and plastic silverware. “Unwrap all those and set them on the tables?”

Alexia nodded and the girls set to work.