The Crystal Child (40 page)

Alex might have driven well into Baja on that first day, but he stopped outside of Imperial Beach just short of the border and checked into the cheapest motel he could find.  It was only mid-afternoon but he decided to give himself more time to think.  Now that the prospect of finding Julia had become real, he was filled with doubt.  What would he say when he met her?  Forrester believed she would welcome seeing him, but what if he was wrong?  Most troubling of all, could he bring himself to face Aaron without being overcome with rage?

This would be more of a test than Forrester realized. Alex had not mentioned it, but his father was as much a part of the ordeal as his mother.  He was carrying painful memories of heated arguments with Jake.  Alex got through his freshman year at college, but started searching for Julia during his first summer vacation.  Without telling Jake, he visited his Aunt Ellen in Dallas, burning up a few thousand dollars on his credit card to pay for the trip.  But she knew nothing about Julia.  To his dismay, she did not show the least anxiety.  “She was ashamed,” Ellen said. “She went somewhere to live it down.  I’m sure she’ll get in touch some day. I’m sure she wants your forgiveness.”

Yes, that’s how Aunt Ellen would see things, that was how everybody saw it.  But they were so very wrong.  Julia was not the one to be forgiven.
He
, Alex, was the guilty party.  He had snitched on his mother.  Why?  Because he wanted to see her punished.  Aaron too.  He was jealous and heedless.  And plain stupid.  It never crossed his mind that his mother might go to prison, never occurred to him that Jake would let that happen — or make that happen.  How childish he had been, not to discern the passions that were involved in this tangled situation.  His mother’s vulnerability, his father’s fury.

He remembered exactly how her voice sounded that afternoon as she followed him down the stairs.  That afternoon he had humiliated her.  Half-dressed, her hair falling across her face. 
Alex, please!
  Pleading. 
Don’t tell
, she meant. 
Please
don’t tell.  When he thought of her that way — so helpless, so desperate — he could not bear the guilt he felt.  She was asking him for mercy, but he had refused to listen.  He had hardened his heart and told his father what he had seen.

After the trial, Alex wanted to visit her at Stockton, but his father would not hear of it.  Instead Jake packed up and left the area, abandoning Julia.  That one thought — his mother alone, caged among criminals, killers, prostitutes, drug addicts — sent Alex to bed in tears every night.  He made up outlandish scenarios of helping her escape, the two of them on the run, hiding from the law.  Wanting to protect her, he wept with self-recrimination.  How could he have been so treacherous?  If she never wanted to lay eyes on him again, she would be justified.

There was something Forrester had said, something about Julia being under a spell.   That was the last thing Alex would have expected to hear from a hard-assed nerd like Forrester.  But that was the way Alex was now thinking about what lay before him.  He was walking into a black fantasy, perhaps a nightmare, that began just outside the door of his motel, a few miles down the highway.  His mind was made up.  If he crossed the border, he would not stop to think again.  He would go all the way and never look back.  And if Julia accepted him, if she forgave him and said she wanted to come home, he would do anything he must do to save her.

***

“You have a visitor,” Eduardo said.  He had come to knock at her door.  He was wearing an odd, inquisitive expression, as if he were asking rather than telling.

So soon
, Julia thought at once. 
How could he have come so soon? 
She had made her call only the day before.  At the door, she asked, “
Isobe?
  He’s here?”

Eduardo returned a deeply puzzled look.  “Isobe?  No.  It is a young man.  He says he is your son.”  Julia stood for a long speechless moment, stunned by his words.  “Do you wish to see him?” Eduardo asked.   “His name is Alex,” he added as if offering a credential.

“Wait,” she whispered, drawing back into the room to hide her response.  She leaned against the wall beside the door breathing deeply as if she were recovering from a blow. She came back into view to ask, “Where is he?”

“He is in the conservatory.”

“How did he find his way here?” she asked simply to have something to say.

“I have no idea,” Eduardo answered, as if that should be obvious.  The after a pause, “He can be sent away, if you wish.”

“No,” she blurted out.  Then, “I can’t send him away.”

“Then shall I tell him … ”

“Yes.  I’ll be there.”

***

DeLeon knew of Alex’s arrival before Julia did.  Eduardo, taking the call from the guards, brought the news to him first.  “A young man. He says he is her son.”

“Her son!”

“So he says.”

“What does he want?”

“Simply to see her.”

“Bring him here.”

“Shall I tell Dr. Stein”

DeLeon took his time answering.  “No, not yet. 
Bring him here first.  And tell Signora Pagoli to come.”

By the time Alex entered the living room, Sylvana had joined DeLeon. They sat, a grim pair who had no friendly greeting to offer.

“Of course we will let your mother know you’re here,” DeLeon said, “But it would be best if we talked first.”  There was a stern tone in his voice that belied the smile he was offering.  At his side, Sylvana’s face was a haughty mask.

Alex was determined not to let these people stare him down.  “I don’t know who you are.”

“Peter DeLeon. Dr. Peter DeLeon.  And this is Signora Sylvana Pagoli.  You are in our home.”

“And you won’t let my mother leave?”

A look of worried surprise invaded DeLeon’s face.  “Why do you say that,” he answered nervously, his smile growing tighter.  “I said we need to talk first.”

“It is the least you can do,” Sylvana added.  “You may not understand.  We have sheltered your mother here.”

“Well, that’s great,” Alex answered with a dismissive sniff.  “I’m sure she’s grateful.  But I’ve come to take her home.”

“And Aaron?” Sylvana asked her eyes fixed and fearful.

“I don’t know about him.  If my mother wants him to come along … .”

“No!” she rose from her chair, shouting loud enough to make her voice crack.  Alex, jolted by her outburst, leaped to his feet.  “She cannot take him away.  That I will not permit.”

Alex felt both trepidation and fury rising in him. He had no idea how to deal with these two.  Should he tread carefully or treat them with contempt?   “Listen, that’s up to my mother, okay?  Anyway, I don’t really care about him … Aaron.  I just want to see my mother.  So would you mind?”

“I’ll send for Julia.  Do be patient.”  DeLeon gestured toward a seat.  Alex, too restless to wait, tried to think of an excuse to get away from these people.  He had not expected a meeting like this. What if he said the wrong thing?  As if he knew what he was doing, he started for the door.

“Where are you going?” DeLeon called after him, his tone sharply commanding.

“I’m going to check something in my van.”

“You won’t find it there.”

“Where is it?”

“I had it reparked.”

“You moved my van?”  He stepped out of the room and quickly moved several steps down the hall.  He could see to the front of the house from there.  His van was not where he had left it.  But one of the guards who had escorted him to the house was still there sitting on the bumper of his hummer.  Alex did not like the look of this.  At the gate, the guards had acted like bullies, demanding to search his van.  When he refused, one of them unbuttoned his gun holster and simply started searching.  Then, without asking permission, he had frisked Alex, a rough pat down.  Alex hurried back to ask DeLeon where his van was.

“Well taken care of,” DeLeon said, brushing the question aside. “I didn’t know Julia had a son.   She never mentioned you.  You are — how old?”

“Twenty,” Alex said.  Close enough.

“And you are at school  … somewhere?”

“Not now.  Where did you put my van?”

“Don’t worry, I had your luggage placed in the front hall.”  He moved to a side table and poured a drink, some kind of juice.  The sound of clinking ice reminded Alex of how dry his mouth had become.  DeLeon offered the glass; Alex took it and drank.   “Your father knows you are here?”

Too confused to collect his thoughts, Alex flopped down on the nearest sofa, suddenly realizing how very tired he was.  “My father?”  He paused, wondering if he should admit to being on his own.  “Sure.  Lots of people know I’m here.”

“Lots?”

“Some others.  A few.”  He could see DeLeon thinking his answer over.

“Well, yes.  I should think you’d want to keep in touch with people at home.  I hope you are.”

“Sure I am.”  Suddenly, his eyes were blinking open.  He had nodded off.  For how long?  Across the room, DeLeon and Sylvana were in the same chairs, watching him.

“Of course,” DeLeon said, “you’re tired.  Feel free to rest yourself.  Sylvana, my dear, can we have Eduardo bring the young man something to eat?”

She rose and left the room.

Alex, growing more nervous under DeLeon’s gaze, stretched his eyes as wide as he could. 
Mustn’t fall asleep,
he told himself.  He stood and walked around the room to keep awake, trying to remember the words he had practiced for his first meeting with Julia.  Finally he sat again, determined to stay awake.  Within seconds he was dozing.

***

Before she went to meet Alex, Julia spent a long quiet time gathering her thoughts.  It was almost three years since she had seen him, but the image — the last she had seen of him — lived on vividly in her memory.  Standing at the head of the stairs in her home, she remembered seeing him at the door.  A bewildered, angry boy who could not bear to look her in the face. It was their last moment together.  She knew that; he knew that. She wanted to catch his eye, to offer him a brave smile, but when she called to him, he lowered his head, turned, and rushed away.  After that, during her year in prison and since, Alex survived in her thoughts as a succession of painful memories, images of hurt and betrayal.  She assumed she had lost him forever and had finally decided that might be for the best.  But now here he was, entering her life again without warning.  Had he come to revile her?  She had no idea what to expect, but she could not turn him away.  She rose and crossed the room to study herself in a mirror.  In a few years she felt she had aged a lifetime.  Her hair streaked with gray, her face more lined. Best let him see her for what she was.  Perhaps he would find some pity for her.

She found him in the conservatory, sprawled across a sofa, fast asleep, snoring lightly.  She paused in the doorway, a smile of relief on her lips.  She would have wanted to find him no other way.  Her sleeping child — this was how she remembered him from the countless mornings she had awakened him when they were together.  She saw him before she realized DeLeon was in the room.  When she entered, DeLeon reached over to tap Alex’s knee.  The boy sprang awake, looking bleary-eyed in all directions, finally catching sight of Julia.  At once his face filled with embarrassment and confusion.  Neither said a word.  He rose.  Taller now, more manly.  And, yes, as handsome as she knew he would be one day.  A fine young man.

“Your son,” DeLeon said, making the introduction warily as if he were testing to make sure Alex was not an imposter.  “Quite a surprise.”  He paused again, checking reactions.  “He has had a tiring trip.”  He waited.  “Of course, he is welcome to stay.”  Looking from one to the other, he could tell they would not speak until he had left.  “You have so much to talk about,” he said as he withdrew.  “Sylvana is ordering some food.  I will have Eduardo prepare a room.”

Alex waited until the sound of DeLeon’s shoes had died down the corridor, then came to Julia hesitantly as if asking permission at every step.  He stood close before her and let her fold him in her arms.  He returned the embrace, leaning to rest his head on her shoulder. She seemed so small in his arms, so fragile.   At her ear she heard him sobbing.  “Please … I’m so sorry,” he was whispering.  “I shouldn’t have.  I was so angry. Please.”  The words were tumbling out of him, a stream of slurred, apologetic fragments.  Not what she expected.  What she heard was the weeping of the child she could remember from the day she had born him into life.  Every hurt Alex had ever brought to her for comfort, every sorrow, fear, and disappointment he had known was there in the voice that was now begging for her forgiveness.  Quietly, she hushed him as she had hundreds of times before and held him still closer.  How good it was to have this person, this body pressed against her. She could spend hours like this.  After a while, taking him by the hand, she led him away toward her room.

“I’ve come to take you away,” he said.  “If you want to.”

“Yes, my dear,” she said, “that’s what I want.”

***

Once they were alone, they fell into a long silence.  There was so much to talk about, but no need for words.  Only one thing mattered.  They were bound together by mutual forgiveness.  Everything else was mere information.

“How did you find me?” she wanted to know.

“Kevin told me.”

“You talked to him?”

“Sure.  I talked to everybody.  Aunt Ellen, Mr. Briggs, people at the clinic.  If Kevin didn’t know where you were, I was going to give up.  Oh, yeah,” he said, reaching suddenly for his backpack.  “Kevin asked me to give this to you.”  He fished out Forrester’s letter and handed it to her. Julia took the letter with clear hesitation.  “He said to tell you it’s his flag of surrender.  I don’t know what that means.  He’s an odd guy.  I mean, he’s not like I remember him.” Julia slipped the envelope into her blouse.  “He said it’s very personal.  I didn’t read it or anything.  Maybe it’s important,” he added, hoping she might read it right away and tell him what it said.

“It can wait, I’m sure.”

Alex craned to look out of the window, trying to take in as much of the house as he could.  “What is this place?” he asked.

“A sanctuary,” she said.  Then, smiling, “A sanctuary as big as the Ritz.”

“Yeah, really spacious.  But you want to leave?”

“I have to.  Soon.”

As if he were ready to leave at once, Alex stood up.  “Right.  I’ll take you.  We can drive out of here right now.  That guy — DeLeon — he moved my van, but I’ll make him bring it back.”  The words exhilarated him.  They were the words he had been waiting years to say to her. The man in her life.  If there was an army of giants standing in their way, he would take them on.

“Alex,” she said, seeking to calm him, “I can’t return to the United States.  I’m a criminal there.  I don’t want to fall into the hands of the law again.”

“Then what?”

“There’s someplace else I want to go.”

“Any place.  I’ll take you.”

Then the words that she knew would strike him like a slap in the face.  “And I can’t leave alone.”  He would know what she meant.  She watched closely to see how he responded.

He was waiting.  Ready.  He swallowed hard and measured his words.  “Sure.  Of course.  I know that.  Aaron …” But the name tripped him up.  He stopped and looked away to compose himself.  “You’ll want to be with him.”

“I have no choice.  Though it’s only for a little while longer.”

“How long?  Years?”  The question had a resentful edge.  He had rehearsed this part of their conversation scores of times, but saying the words out loud hurt more than he anticipated.  “That’s okay,” he added hastily.  “Whatever you think is best, that’s what we’ll do.”

She came to him and laid her hand to his cheek, then drew him closer.  “Dear Alex.  I know how hard that is for you to say.  But things have changed.”  She took his hand, knowing what she must do.  “Come with me.”