The Darkest Danger (Shattered Series Book 2) (26 page)

     Uncaring of the barbed pieces, he grabbed the wire and didn’t even flinch as he went under. But, as he neared the burnt down home, there wasn’t any denying the wrenching pain that tore at his very soul. Like ghosts, their spirits seemed to howl in misery as he passed what once was the portico.

     The portico crumbled in some parts as he stepped onto what was left of it. Though nothing remained of the house that was once theirs, he could remember every part and special moments that they’d within the walls so vividly.

     Even now, he could hear Colin’s childish laughter as they’d chased him up the stairs and Meghan’s infant wails as he’d walked the floor to calm her during the dark hours of the night. Right here, at this same exact spot, Caitlyn had always greeted him with a kiss.

     But, rather than the memories appeasing him, they angered him further. In one long stride, he left the portico before venturing further along the ruins. He bypassed the space where the gazebo had been, the swing set frame that lacked seats and a slide….

     He walked on.

     The broken path fell into view.

     And the place where they were, he mulled, no longer able to control the gut wrenching sobs, it would always be sacred ground.

     The branches and leaves slapped against him as he tore down the path. His harsh and erratic breathing marred the darkened shadows with its coming. Still, as he ran, he didn’t really see or feel anything but the misery and pain the enveloped him.

     The path split.

     When he met the wide open space, he stopped running, and then, looked round the graveyard with a wild, desperate look.

     Alongside of each other, the stone gray tombstones stood, and the very sight of them crippled his resolve.

     Breathing hard and fast, he let out the wounded sound before saying the broken word. “
No
.”

     Like a drunkard, he stumbled blindingly towards the stone gray tombstones, and when he reached them, he dropped down to his knees

     “Caitlyn, Colin,” he sobbed, barely able to catch his breath, and the pain constricted in his chest. “Dear God, how can I ever live with what I’ve done to you? If I’d been half the man that I was supposed to be, I should’ve been there to stop this from happening to you.” His words were a breathless whisper. “I’ve failed you both in the worst possible way. I should be here not you.”
     “Colin. My boy,
my sweet boy
,” he wept openly. “I’m a broken man without you son. I should’ve been a better father to you. It was my job to protect you. But, I didn’t, son. It’s my fault that you’re dead. If I’d been there, you wouldn’t be lying here right now.” His weeping made his words nearly indecipherable. “I love you, son.”

  Overwhelmed with his emotions, he pounded the ground hard with both fists repeatedly and began to break through the dirt. His knuckles cracked, his flesh bled red, and he eagerly absorbed both the physical and emotional pain.

     He fought to breathe as he looked at Caitlyn’s grave. Even now, wasn’t he betraying her in the worst way by loving another woman?

     “I can’t find enough words,” he whispered. “You were an incredible woman, and I loved you. You were my friend---the mother of my children. You were good to me.” He looked to the sky with tear-filled eyes. “Every time I think of how you suffered and died, it sickens my soul. I’m sorry for what you had to go through. Like I failed our son, I failed you.
I’m failing
you now
.” He gulped hard. “We were never ones for secrets, were we? I’m not about to start keeping them from you now.”

     The graveyard howled with silence.

     But, the quiet truth resonated beyond it.

     “On the night that you left me, I made a promise to you. I vowed to never love another woman,” he whispered again, staring unseeingly at the tombstone. “But, it’s been a promise that I haven’t been able to keep. Caitlyn, I’ve fallen in love with another woman.
Please forgive me
.”

     “I didn’t want to love her---I tried not to love her. But, I do,” he rasped, sucking in a painful breath. “She saved me, filling me with the breath that I thought that I was incapable of breathing in again. She made me see so clearly in the dark world that I lived in.” His words were low. “I need her in my life---Meghan needs her. We can’t let her go.
I’m begging you to understand that
.”

     A gentle hand fell on his shoulder, and it was a touch that he knew so readily. Numbed, weakened, still kneeling on the ground, he turned to find Olivia standing over him weeping.

     “I love you,” she whispered, kneeling down on the ground before him, and wiped the hot tears from his face. “Baby, you can’t keep blaming yourself for what happened. You are not to blame. It’s not your fault. Please, stop punishing yourself for something that was out of your control.”

     “How could I let them die?” Sobbing uncontrollably, he clung to her, and like a dying man, he accepted the inevitable truth. “They’re gone. Olivia, they’re gone.”

     “I know that you loved them,” she cried softly. “And I have no doubt that they loved you, too. But, do you really believe that they would want you to live like this---living a life of self-blame self-hatred. In my truest heart, I know that they’d want you and Meghan to be happy.” Pulling back, she cupped his face in his hands, and in her brown eyes, her deep love and acceptance of him shone. “Lately, I know that I really haven’t said the words, but I’m saying them now. I love you, and no matter how many times you run or try to push me away, I’m going to keep coming back.
I love you
.”

     Releasing him, she faced the tombstones. “Colin, I know that tomorrow is your birthday, and I’m sure that you were a great kid, inside and out. How could you not be considering that you have shades of your father? I wish that I’d had the chance to know you, and I hope along the way that I’ll learn things,” she murmured, nearly overcome with her own emotions. “I’m sorry for what happened to you. But, I know that the little angels in heaven are taking care of you right now.”

     As she looked at Caitlyn’s tombstone, she grasped his hand in hers. Her eyes swelled with more tears. “Caitlyn, I’m so sorry that you had to die such a brutal death. No human being should ever have to suffer that way. Just hearing about you from Rosa, I can tell that you were an extraordinary woman.” Though, she tried, she couldn’t stop her lips from trembling. “I’ll never take your place in Jarrod’s life, and I know that a part of him will always love you. You are Meghan’s mother, and you always will be. I’m not trying to replace you, not in anyway. I’m just asking that you understand that I’m a part of their lives now.” Her tears spilled over. “I love them so much, and they’re a part of me. Caitlyn, I swear to you that I’ll love and protect them both, above everything and all else. I promise you.”

     She turned to him again.

     Their eyes met and held in the shadows.

     “They’re dead,” he rasped, finally absorbing the awful truth. The sobs racked his body. “They’re gone.”

     “Baby, I’m sorry,” she consoled him, crying along with him, and hugged him close. “I’m so sorry.”

     He held onto her tight.

     Finally, he grieved for the wife and son that he’d lost.

***

     The hard pelting rain arrived with clashing bolts of silver lightning just as they’d made it halfway from the stables. Grabbing hold of her, he did his best to shield her as they made a mad dash for the house.

     When they reached the mansion, the driving winds were forceful and rough, and it seemed that they had to fight to against them to get the door open. On the umpteenth try, they finally succeeded. Drenched to the bone, soaking wet from head to toe, they entered through the back way of the kitchen. The lights were out, casting the space in darkness. But, the intermittent flashes of light from the growing storm provided some visibility.

    And his emotions were still stormy, she realized quickly, catching a glimpse of his face as the light danced against it. Still, though, she didn’t voice her own thoughts as they passed through.

     Instead of taking the stairway, he led them past it before going in the opposite direction and headed for the master’s suite. A breathless second later, they were entering the huge bedroom. As soon as they stepped in, she sensed every essence of him in the room.

    
Everything was simply him
.

     From the huge mahogany bed at the center of the room, the lap top in the corner, a pair of boxing gloves lying haphazardly on the leather sofa…

     “Let’s get you out of these wet clothes,” Jarrod murmured, already reaching for the end of her t-shirt, and then whisked it over her head. “I don’t want you to catch a chill.”

     “And you’ll catch one if you don’t do the same,” she smiled gently, working to free the shirt from his broad shoulders. As she tugged the sleeve over his right hand, he winced. She frowned up at him. “Are you hurt?”

     He shrugged. “It’s nothing.”

     “What do you mean it’s nothing? Men and their pigheadedness at trying to play the tough guy, it’s just plain childish if you ask me,” she scolded, turning his hand over in hers, seeing the abrasions. Muttering under her breath, she led him to the bed. “I’m going to find something to put on this and grab some towels. Take those pants off. I’ll be right back.”

     Disregarding her own disheveled, half-dressed state, she padded across the bedroom floor.  After entering the bathroom, she went straight to the medicine cabinet and extracted the soothing salve cream and bandages. Placing the items on the counter, she grabbed two large bathing towels from the linen closet and dried herself off quickly with one of them. She wiggled the shorts and bikini briefs off before tossing the brassiere aside and then wrapped a large towel around her nude body. Confiscating the supplies, she returned to the bedroom and was satisfied upon seeing that he’d taken her instructions.

     Now, he sat propped against the plush pillows.

     Just what was he was thinking, she mulled, taking in his unreadable expression.

     Whatever it was, it was thought-provoking.

     She placed the items on the nightstand. “You know what? We’re going to have to quit meeting like this,” she teased, attempting to lighten the mood. “A storm, you and a flesh wound---”

     “Come here,” Jarrod said huskily.

     She grabbed the hand that he held out. “But, you’re hurt---”

     “I’m more than convinced that I’ll survive,” he murmured, pulling her towel clad form into his arms, and sighed heavily. “Right now, at the moment, all I need is you.”

     She listened to his heartbeat as she lay against his chest, and the sound of its steady rhythm soothed her. “I guess the storm’s not going to let up anytime soon, is it?” she asked, hearing the howling winds outside. “It’s good that we were close to the house before things really got bad.” Sighing sweetly, she propped up on his chest and gave a soft smile. “I’m getting you all wet.”

     He fingered the soft damp curls along the edge of her face. “And I’m not complaining,” he said seriously, tracing along her lips. “Being close to you is all that I care about.”

     Her voice softened. “I missed you.”

     His eyes glinted with sensual promise. “Why don’t you come closer so I can make it up to you?”

     She held his gaze.

     For wasn’t she always magnetized by it?

     As she rose to her knees, he followed her every move. After giving one tug, the towel fell to the bed, and she was left naked and wanting before him. Rather than covering herself, she boldly made her wants and needs known.

     Taking both hands, she threaded her hands through her thick tresses before lifting it from her nape. She paused momentarily, keeping form, and allowed him to get plain view of her naked flesh. Her plump breasts were like rounded globes, and her skin was infused with pure heat; and her rosy tips, they were already budded and tight. Keeping her right hand in her hair, she let the other one fall, only to slide it suggestively along the moist place between her thighs.    

     A dangerous glint shone in his eyes. “My sweet love,” he whispered again. “I promise that I have a cure for all that agony and pain.”

     As he lifted the covers, she crawled in.

     Yet, she didn’t have a moment to muster a thought as he pulled her naked body across his. “Do you know how much I fucking love you?” he rasped, staring into her eyes. “You think that you do, but I don’t believe you really understand.”

     “If it’s the same uncontrollable, crazy, and intense feelings that I have, I think that I do,” she admitted, and her eyes roamed over his face. “I know, I feel, and I understand how much you love me.” Her eyes misted with tears. “And I love you in the same way.”

     “You slay me,” he rasped again. “My beautiful goddess.”

     “
You slay me
,” she whispered back. “I love you.”

     Their lips met.

     The kiss was tender and sweet.