The Darkness Within Him: The Untwisted series (22 page)

‘The cuffs and toys are fun but we’ve not used them since getting back together because, to be honest, as long as I’m with you, Becky, I’m happy. I don’t need all that other stuff.’ Wow, he really had made progress. I could see the truth shining in his eyes. He genuinely meant it.

I chewed on my lip. Something deep inside me was disappointed. There, I’d admitted it, even if not out loud. I had enjoyed using the gentler toys with Nicholas; they’d been new, completely unknown, and downright exciting when combined with his skilled touch in the bedroom.

Suddenly he laughed and, seeing as his cock was still inside me, I felt it right to my core. ‘Just when I thought your cheeks were as red as they could get you’ve managed to blush even more,’ he observed with narrowed eyes. ‘I think perhaps you liked experimenting with the toys more than you’ll ever admit out loud, Becky,’ he concluded softly as if he’d just read my mind.

A flicker of his old arrogance returned for a brief second but his tone was peculiar, causing me to meet his gaze. As I did, it was my turn to gasp. Nicholas’ eyes were blazing again, his intention obvious, and no sooner had I registered the excitement in his pupils than I felt him stirring to life inside me again.

‘Perhaps I could dig out that box of toys again …’ he murmured teasingly. ‘Wrap your legs around me, Rebecca,’ he ordered, rolling my full name across his tongue while gripping my waist in his strong hands. His tone made me comply immediately, and once I was secure, he proceeded to walk me to the bedroom with us still joined at the waist intimately.

Nicholas kicked the bedroom door shut behind him and lowered us both to the bed with a hissed breath. ‘Christ, Becky, you’re so fucking wet I almost lost control just walking here,’ he whispered, dropping his forehead onto mine and closing his eyes while he drew in several steadying breaths. He wasn’t the only one who needed to recover. Being carried in his arms while his erection throbbed inside me and rubbed against me with every step had almost been my undoing. As for going up the stairs, I thought I was going to come on each and every frigging step.

‘I’ll be back in a second,’ he murmured, easing himself out of me with reluctance. As he reached the door, he paused, a dark smile forming on his lips as he turned back to me.

Tugging his dressing gown from the hook on the back of the door, he pulled the long cotton belt free and threw it at me. ‘Undress and then blindfold yourself,’ he instructed thickly, then, without giving me a chance to object, he left the room.

Blindfold myself? Wow, that was unexpected … but actually kind of hot, I thought with a wicked grin. Was this insanely gorgeous, kinky, sexy man really mine?

Undressing in record time – if there were Olympic medals for disrobing, believe me, I would have won gold – I tied the strip of fabric around my eyes until everything went dark. Then I lay back and eagerly awaited his return, my body already thrumming with arousal.

Luckily, in my hugely aroused state I didn’t have to wait long before I heard the bedroom door opening. If the door hadn’t squeaked, I would still have known that Nicholas was back because there was a growl of approval that made me grin uncontrollably.

‘God, you are so beautiful, Rebecca.’ His voice was surprisingly close by. He must have crossed the room silently and be standing right next to the bed, leaning over me. I shivered in anticipation.

Next, I felt the soft caress of his fingers on my wrist, lazily trailing across the sensitive skin over my pulse point in a teasing series of circles. ‘Would you like to be tied up or not?’ Nicholas asked softly.

Tied up … I’d experienced both sides of that in the past. The intense pleasure brought about from not being able to move while Nicholas stimulated me had definitely given me one of my most powerful orgasms ever, but then on the other hand I still remembered the gut-wrenching, stifling fear of being restrained and unable to escape while he used the cane on me to beat out his fury.

A shudder escaped me at the memory and my fear must have been evident on my face because I felt the bed dip as he lowered himself down beside me. I felt the softness of his lips descend on mine before he slipped my blindfold up onto my forehead. ‘We can leave that part, Rebecca. You are safe with me, baby, I promise. Do you want me to stop?’

The obvious concern and love on Nicholas’ face made it clear to me that I had no need to worry; he wouldn’t hurt me. So with a shy smile, I kissed him back and then readjusted the blindfold over my eyes again.

‘Tie me up,’ I instructed, raising my arms above my head and hoping the gesture would establish in his heart that I really did trust him again. A small hiss escaped his lips and heated my cheek before he kissed me once more, then set about tying both my wrists and ankles to the four posts of the bed. Once he was done, I was completely spread-eagled and unable to move.

You’d think I’d be mortified in such an exposing position, wouldn’t you? But I wasn’t. Perhaps it was the knowledge that Nicholas loved me that did it, or just because we knew each other’s body intimately by now, but surprisingly I no longer found this type of position embarrassing and I relaxed back into the mattress, eagerly awaiting his next trick.

The sound of a match being struck to my right made me turn my head, and the smell of sulphur registered briefly in my nose before a lovely waft of something sweet caught my breath. Orange blossom. Nicholas must have lit an orange blossom candle somewhere nearby and the fact he remembered my favourite scent made my heart tighten in my chest. It wasn’t exactly a common scent for a candle either, so he’d obviously gone out of his way to find it: another point in his favour.

Even through my blindfold, I could tell when he turned off the main light because everything went even blacker than before. The thought that he was going to make love to me in candlelight, something so classically romantic, made my heart constrict and sent a shot of lust coursing through my body.

A huge smile broke on my lips as I lay waiting for him to return to the bed; the progress Nicholas had made emotionally in the last few weeks was truly phenomenal, both in the bedroom and out, and I had to keep reminding myself he was new to the whole “romance” thing. Although with the candles, flowers, and general obsession with my happiness it had to be said that he was handling it all like a pro.

Suddenly, Nicholas’ mouth was on mine. He must have been leaning over the bed because I hadn’t felt him sit down but his lips were so soft and gentle that I found myself craning my neck up for more of his delicious pressure.

Then his lips were gone and I felt momentarily lost until they began licking and nibbling at the skin of my breast before latching on to one of my nipples, which he sucked into his warm mouth. Being “blind” and teased this way was quite something, making my insides liquefy with pleasure. Nicholas’ other hand began roaming across my skin, touching with feather-light flicks: stomach, thigh, hip. As his fingers found my swollen clitoris, he sucked my nipple right into his mouth harder than before, almost to the point of pain. But oh, what delicious pain it was, so good that I felt it right deep down in my groin.

‘Ahhh!’ I cried out, arching my back for more and almost feeling ashamed to enjoy this fine balance of pleasure and pain that he was bestowing on me. Then he released my hardened, sensitive nipple before kissing his way across to the other one to repeat the treatment.

The blindfold increased my awareness of his touch tenfold, and that soon became almost too much for me to handle. The sensation of Nicholas’ tongue running along the seam of my lips and plundering my mouth while his hands worked simultaneously at my breasts and clitoris was overwhelming and I pulled back, gasping for air and writhing below him like a wild animal.

Sensing my imminent release, he slowed things down, briefly leaving my side before returning and laying himself alongside me. The feel of his naked body and erection warm and hard against my thigh made me sigh contentedly and turn my head to where I thought his face might be. My aim was right and I felt his lips seek out mine, kissing me lingeringly on the mouth, before something cool pressed against the apex of my thighs.

‘I think you might like this,’ he murmured against my mouth, before pushing what felt like a lifelike-shaped vibrator deep into my wet channel in one smooth movement.

‘Oh yes,’ I gasped, loving the feel of the vibrator filling me, so alien in its plastic material and yet so familiar in its form, far better than the bullet-style one he’d used on me when we’d first met.

Hearing a click as he turned it on, I expected it to buzz inside me and gasped in shock as, instead of vibrating, the whole thing circled rhythmically.
Wow
, this thing was incredible, somehow managing to hit all the right spots with its sweeping motion. A second click followed, and as well as circling, the vibrator began to pulse inside me. Nicholas joined in the fun by grazing his thumb across my clitoris in a teasing series of sweeps.

‘Oh God!’ I couldn’t help but call out from the sensory overload. The pleasure from the vibrator combined with Nicholas’ thumb, not to mention his mouth on my breast, was too much for me to handle silently, especially as I couldn’t move. After only a few moments, I exploded in a body-shaking orgasm, screaming his name and writhing below him as much as my restraints allowed.

The mattress shifted as Nicholas moved around me undoing each of the bonds in turn. He gently kissed each limb before moving to the next. Swallowing, I realised my throat was sore from yelling his name, and as he removed my blindfold I regained my focus and saw him grinning down at me broadly.

‘Could you shout my name louder next time? I’m not sure the people in the next street heard you,’ he remarked lightly as my cheeks flamed with shame.

‘Sorry,’ I croaked as his lips lowered toward mine invitingly.

‘Don’t apologise. I love hearing you scream my name, baby.’ He kissed me lingeringly on my already swollen mouth.

‘Now it’s my turn, Becky, but I don’t need any toys. I like to enjoy them sometimes but I like to enjoy you even more,’ he whispered against my neck. He positioned himself between my legs and entered me so deliciously slowly that I could feel every single inch sliding inside me until he was buried to the hilt.

My body was still quivering from the aftershocks of my previous orgasm, not to mention the one in the kitchen. Jeez, I was going to sleep like a log tonight, and be walking a bit funny too, but even through my exhaustion, I felt my body reacting to Nicholas’ tender lovemaking. How could it not? Instinct took over, and as I met him thrust for thrust, he brought me to yet another mind-blowing climax, murmuring my name over and over against my neck and making me feel like the most treasured thing on earth.

Chapter Nineteen

That night, we were due at Nathan’s for dinner and I was
dreading
it. I’d lost count of the amount of times I’d huffed and puffed out my anxiousness in the last few hours. I’d distracted myself from consciously thinking about it for most of the afternoon, but as I settled myself in Nicholas’ plush car I felt my stomach bunch with nerves at the thought of seeing Nathan again. Nicholas would be there with me, but still, Nathan had seemed to be even more intimidating than Nicholas, if that was possible; something I attributed to his overwhelming self-confidence. Probably after meeting him a few times and getting used to his mannerisms, I’d feel more relaxed in his company. Yeah, right.

The drive to Nathan’s apartment in Canary Wharf took about half an hour. Although I knew Docklands was a thriving business area of London, I’d had no idea that there were also residential areas too. In fact, as we made our way between large, skyscraper offices and converted dock buildings, I was surprised to see a variety of trendy shops, bars, and restaurants lining the streets of the thriving area.

Mr Burrett dropped us off at the base of a huge apartment block that had to be at least 30 floors high. Blimey. It was all steel and glass, and just as sterile and imposing as the resident we were on our way to visit.

We entered the lift and I wasn’t really surprised when Nicholas pressed the button for the top and then entered a private code. Well, this was Nathan’s home; if he was anything like his brother, he would have the best apartment in the place, wouldn’t he? The lift came to a stop on the top floor and I saw there was only one doorway off the small landing. Ah, the penthouse, of course, that was obviously why the private code had been needed in the lift.

Without us knocking, Nathan opened the door to his apartment almost immediately. He was dressed in smart navy trousers and a pale blue shirt that accentuated just how broad his shoulders were. The colour of his top was an exact match for the startling ice-blue of his eyes. Ridiculously, I gripped Nicholas’ hand tighter as I felt Nathan appraise me with a sweep of his gaze before he stood back and ushered us inside with a brisk wave of his hand.

Oh wow! Clearly Nathan made as much money as Nicholas, if not more, because his apartment was stunning, and I mean breath-taking. The entire front wall of the lounge was made of glass, allowing the evening sun to stream in, warming the room and illuminating the elegantly stylish furniture that adorned it. The view over London was beautiful and I dawdled for a second to admire the last rays of sun glinting off the water of the smart dock area outside. As I turned back into the room, my eyes swept over the space again. Leather sofas of black and white surrounded a marble fireplace and rich, colourful rugs were spread across the floor; it was like a show home, but far, far better. It was such a contrast to my poky little flat that I found myself feeling just a tiny bit jealous.

As we moved toward the sofas, Nathan introduced us to a woman who was standing by the door and appeared decidedly on edge.

‘Rebecca, this is Stella,’ he said, indicating the woman who seemed somehow slim but curvy at the same time, with bright green eyes and flowing blonde hair that fell to just below her shoulders. Nicholas had clearly met her before because he smiled at her and nodded his head in greeting, but he sent an odd look toward his brother that completely confused me.

Nicholas and I sat down on a soft black leather two-seater and Nathan settled himself opposite us on the white couch. Stella was now hovering by the end like a frozen puppet. What a strange girl she seemed; she still hadn’t uttered a word. She was beautiful and her straight back indicated confidence but the posture of her neck made her seem uncomfortable because her eyes were downcast and her hands twisted nervously in front of her. As I studied her odd behaviour, everything dropped into focus for me with sickening clarity …

Stella was Nathan’s submissive.

Of course she was. Nicholas had already told me his brother always had a live-in sub and it was the perfect explanation for her odd behaviour.

A small gasp left my lips at the realisation and I felt Nicholas tense next to me. Glancing at him, I found his eyes on me, a look of concern fluttering on his eyebrows as though he knew exactly what I was thinking. Oh wait … he did know exactly what I was thinking. He already knew about Stella, and knew exactly what role she played in his brother’s life. Great, apparently I was the only one in the dark.

Our eye contact was broken as I heard Nathan shift on the white sofa. ‘Sit,’ he ordered softly, patting the seat next to him and looking up at Stella expectantly. She immediately sat down, perched on the front of the sofa cushion with her hands linked on her thighs, head slightly bowed and her eyes averted toward the floor.

With sick fascination, I watched Nathan as he watched Stella. There was a flicker of something in his eyes: something that told me he had feelings for her, that he saw her as more than just a plaything, but what did I really know? I hardly knew him at all, and I certainly knew nothing about the intricacies of a relationship between a dominant and his submissive.

Gently, Nathan placed a hand on Stella’s shoulder and pulled her back against the sofa so he was sitting with his arm lightly draped around her shoulders. As he did this, a tiny gasp escaped her lips and I felt my stomach twist uncomfortably. From her reaction, they had never sat together like this before, although ironically he had probably done all matter of intimate and pervy things to her in the bedroom.

Jeez, this was so fucked up.

‘Eye contact is permitted,’ I heard him whisper in her ear and immediately she raised her eyes to his reverently, as if she worshipped him, a hint of a smile twitching on her lips.

I blinked several times, trying to clear my head. I felt like I was watching some hugely intimate scene unravel before me. Obviously, the eye contact was a very big thing for Stella and it was actually making me feel quite uncomfortable to bear witness to it. Their gazes locked for a second or two before Nathan winked almost imperceptibly and then turned back to Nicholas.

‘So how was the traffic on your drive over today?’ he asked with an easy smile.

How was the traffic? Really? Given the bizarre circumstances, I thought he might have wanted to talk about something different, although what exactly I expected I wasn’t sure. One thing was apparent, though: Nathan definitely appeared more laidback than when I’d met him last week, eyes wider and muscles more relaxed. Perhaps it was due to being on home territory or perhaps he’d properly accepted that I was dating his brother.

As I thought this, his glance swept across to me and his eyes visibly narrowed for a split second as he looked at where my hand was clasped in Nicholas’. He seemed to have to force himself to relax, and I swallowed hard, the pressure hurting my throat. Yeah, so perhaps Nathan wasn’t my number one fan just yet, then.

A horrible realisation dawned on me, distracting me from what Nathan may or may not think about me. Was this what Nicholas’ previous life had been like? He’d said he was different with me, so had he had submissives just like Stella hanging on his every word, doing his bidding like a good little girl or being punished if they didn’t?

Fuck
. The thought made me sick to my stomach. Fearing I might actually throw up, I practically threw Nicholas’ hand away and lurched to my feet, looking toward Nathan a little desperately, anger starting to build in my vision and making my head spin.

‘Can I use your bathroom, please?’

I saw Nicholas frowning at me but I kept my eyes averted from him; I needed a minute to clear my head. And possibly be sick.

‘Sure – Stella, show Rebecca the bathroom, please, and bring back some drinks for us all afterwards,’ Nathan replied amiably.

Was he telling Stella to get the drinks or me? Because with the way I was feeling right now, Nathan I-own-you Jackson could get his own fucking drinks and drown himself in them.

Leading me away from the lounge into an equally opulent hallway, Stella opened a door to the left to reveal a large, spotless bathroom with white fittings and aquamarine towels. Gratefully, I staggered inside.

‘Thanks,’ I muttered. I slammed the door shut before Stella had a chance to utter even one word, and lurched toward the sink feeling decidedly unsteady.

Breathe, I ordered myself, trying to gather my wits. Flicking on the tap, I scooped up a handful of water and splashed it on my face. The cool liquid seemed to help a little so I repeated the action and even dabbed some on the back of my neck before grabbing a towel and drying myself off. With the towel still gripped in my hand like a security blanket, I put the toilet seat down and sat with my head resting in my hands, trying to settle my spinning emotions. No more than ten seconds later, there was a quiet knock on the door.

‘Rebecca? Are you OK?’

It was Nicholas. I closed my eyes and bit down on my lower lip but remained quiet. Was I OK? How could I be when I knew that not ten feet away Nathan sat with a woman who was at his beck and call like a frigging slave? This was so alien to me, so wrong …

‘Becky, baby?’ The concern in Nicholas’ voice was evident now, its pitch audibly higher. So, reluctantly, I stood up and opened the door so he could come in.

Closing the door behind him, he stepped toward me. Unconsciously, I stepped back, knocking into the sink unit in the process. Now I was trapped, Nicholas persevered forward, cupping my face and forcing me to raise it so he could look in my eyes.

‘Becky, I’m sorry, I had no idea Stella would be here.’ He paused awkwardly. ‘Well, obviously, she pretty much lives here, but she’s never usually around when Nathan has guests. I don’t know why she is today.’ Nicholas dipped his head to place a gentle kiss on my lips, and even in my current foul mood, I felt my body respond to his touch and relax marginally.

‘Were you like that?’ I asked quietly, looking at his shirt buttons intently, my heart hammering in my chest as I awaited an answer I didn’t really want to hear.

‘No. I told you before I’ve never had anyone live with me. The women I was with were just …’ But his voice trailed off as he shifted uncomfortably on his feet.

‘Just for sex?’ I retorted sarcastically, looking at him with an unimpressed expression on my face. ‘So you didn’t control their whole lives, just their sex lives?’ I finished bluntly, not caring if I sounded like a jealous cow.

Nicholas’ face hardened at my crudeness and his eyes narrowed. ‘Yes, exactly. But as I’ve told you, Rebecca, that’s in my past; please leave it there.’ After we’d glared at each other for several seconds, a huge sigh escaped Nicholas’ chest and I watched as his dominant expression faded. ‘You, and only you, are my future, Rebecca. Please believe me when I say that.’

He might not be the world’s most emotionally open man, but when Nicholas chose to express his feelings, he always did it with so much skill that I almost found myself forgiving him and falling into his arms. Almost, but not quite: I wasn’t feeling quite that lenient tonight.

Steadying myself, I attempted to rationalise the situation. I rubbed a towel over my face and blinked several times. I knew Nicholas was right, about us at least: his past was just that,
past
, and his continued declarations left me with no doubt about his feelings toward me.

But Nathan,
wow
, that was a completely different story and the sight of him and Stella together was still sitting heavy in my stomach.

Finally, I nodded. I knew Nicholas had made a lot of compromises for me so I should try to make some effort too. ‘I’m sorry,’ I relented. ‘It’s just a really peculiar situation for me. I’ll be fine,’ I assured him, hanging the towel back up and heading for the door.

‘Let’s go before they think we’re up to something in here,’ I joked, but my tone lacked its usual humour. Apparently, my bad mood hadn’t vanished just yet. Nicholas examined me intently, watching my face as if he could read it somehow and not looking overly thrilled by what he saw. At last, he nodded and followed me back out into the lounge, and I’m pretty sure he noticed that I didn’t touch him once as we rejoined the others.

‘Are you unwell, Rebecca?’ Nathan said directly as we re-emerged into the living area of his stunning apartment. I noticed someone had got me a glass of chilled white wine – no doubt Stella – and I picked up the drink, taking a much-needed sip.

‘I was a little dizzy,’ I lied, ‘but I feel much better now. I’m probably just hungry,’ I concluded with a smile that was my best attempt at convincing him.

‘Well, it’s just as well dinner is served, then,’ he replied, indicating the large dining table by the huge windows. Dinner with a view, and what a view, I thought, allowing my mind to slip away from Stella for a moment and absorb the sun setting over the London skyline as I took my seat. It really was quite breath-taking.

My thoughts were brought back to earth with a bump as soon as Nathan spoke again, however. ‘Stella’s been working very hard to prepare us a nice dinner,’ he said as we took our seats around the table.

I raised an eyebrow. From any other person, the comment wouldn’t have riled me, but knowing the situation here it annoyed me that Stella had prepared the dinner alone and not as part of a team effort, like most of the couples I knew would do. A small snort rose in my throat. God, she’d probably done it because Nathan had ordered her to, I thought sourly, shooting Nathan a frosty glance.

Under the table, I felt Nicholas place his hand on my leg and give my knee a firm squeeze as if noting the return of my bad mood; not that it had ever really gone away. I made a conscious effort to shake it off, then glanced at him, giving a small nod to show that I would try to behave myself.

As dinners go, I have to say Stella had excelled: beef Wellington, creamy mashed potatoes, broccoli, and deliciously rich gravy. It really smelt superb. As good as the food looked, though, I still couldn’t help but watch the interaction between Stella and Nathan with fascination.

Initially, after placing all the food on the table, Stella stood staring at the tablecloth awkwardly, as if unsure how to proceed. Perhaps she was used to serving Nathan first, or maybe they never ate together and this was a first? Gosh, this was very peculiar, but luckily, Nicholas was on the ball and spoke quickly. ‘Shall we all just dig in?’ he enquired, apparently well aware that Stella was stuck about what to do next.