Authors: Lisa M. Stasse
But I realize we can't keep going. The forest is getting too thick.
“Watch out!” Gadya yells at me, as I narrowly avoid a huge tree trunk.
We slam against another tree and the impact jars us sideways. I'm going to have to stop driving soon. There are larger trees ahead, and the armored vehicle can't handle the terrain. There's no way to continue.
I bring the vehicle to a juddering halt.
“We have to get out!” I yell.
Gadya is already swinging open her door. I grab the keys, and open mine.
“Help me with Liam,” I tell her.
Together, we get him out of the car.
“You need a weapon,” I tell him. He seems like a shell of
himself. He's still not recovering. I hand him my knife. He takes it and stares at it for a moment.
“Thanks . . . ,” he mumbles. Then he looks at me blankly.
I realize that he doesn't know my name.
“I'm Alenna,” I tell him, fighting back panic. “Don't you remember me?”
He looks at me. “No.”
“I'm Gadya,” Gadya says. “Ring any bells?”
He shakes his head, sounding dazed. “I've never seen . . . either of you before. . . .”
My heart sinks. He doesn't even remember who I am. I need Liam back. I need to make sure that whatever was done to him isn't permanent.
“Try to think hard,” I tell him. “Try to clear your mind.”
He just keeps staring at me. “Where am I?” he asks. It's worse than I thought.
“We better move,” Gadya says.
I nod. “Can you run?” I ask Liam.
“I think so,” he says.
“Then let's go.” Together, we race alongside Gadya into the forest, leaving the vehicle and the battlefield behind. I was afraid that feelers or soldiers would travel after us, but they are completely occupied by the army of boys. The sounds of constant explosions and gunshots reach our ears. We head deeper into the forest, seeking protection.
We run for a long time, making our way through the brush.
We only stop moving when we can no longer hear the sounds of the battle anymore. We find a small clearing. All of us crouch down to the ground, breathing hard. Liam's eyes are starting to look a little clearer now.
I hug him tightly. “I'm so glad you're alive.”
He hugs me back tentatively. “Same here.”
“You still don't know who I am, do you?”
He shakes his head. “No. I mean you sort of look familiar. But beyond that, it's just a blank.”
Gadya sees that I am on the brink of tears. “I'll give you two a moment alone,” she says. “But remember, we have to keep moving soon.”
She walks about twenty paces away and crouches there, keeping watch for us so that no one attacks.
“What do you remember?” I ask Liam.
“Some of it's coming back to me. I remember that we're fighting the UNA. And I remember that they were about to operate on meâ” He breaks off.
“Yes?” I prompt. I reach out a hand and touch him again. His skin is pale and he feels sweaty.
“I feel pretty sick,” he confesses. “I mean, my thoughts and memories are just a big jumble.” He pauses. “I also feel like I'm going to throw up.”
“Go for it,” I tell him.
Liam stands up and walks over to the edge of the clearing. For a moment, I'm worried that one of those terrifying metal spiders will be inside him. But he just throws up normally into the underbrush. Then he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and walks over.
“Feeling better?” I ask.
He nods.
“Keep throwing up if you need to,” I tell him. “Get the drugs out of your system. Maybe that will help.”
“She's right,” Gadya calls out.
How's your memory feeling?” I ask Liam.
“Not good,” he says, with a grimace. “Like it's filled with holes.”
I work hard not to break down. It never crossed my mind that we would rescue Liam just to find out that he doesn't even remember me. I don't know what drugs he was given. I don't know how long they will take to wear off. I don't even know if they will ever wear off. That thought fills me with dread.
Liam rests on a rock as I rub his back. It feels so good to touch his skin after being away from him for so long. There is so little time for tenderness or physical contact. But it also feels strange to touch him, because I can tell that his muscles aren't relaxed. They are still tense and he is guarded.
He doesn't know who I am.
“Did anyone try to implant you with anything?” I ask, just to be sure. “Like a metal spider-type thing?”
He looks confused. “Wait. That does sound familiar. You've seen those?”
“Yes,” I tell him.
A look of recognition comes across his face. “They're called Mechanized Implanted Obedience Devices. Or MIODs for short. I don't have one in me. For some reason they only put them in girls, I think. But they threatened us with them. I remember that.”
“They put tubes in my neck, and in Gadya's too. She's another friend of oursâremember her?”
He shakes his head.
I continue anyway. “They were trying to control us with drugs. They were trying to train us to work for the UNA or something. We cut the tubes out.”
Liam nods. “I don't think they put anything in most boys because they just wanted to use us as slave labor, at least at first. I
remember hearing that they put the MIODs in girls they think are high flight risks, or extremely violent.”
“Why didn't they put one in me? Or Gadya?”
“They probably had bigger plans for you two. . . .” I can tell that his memories are rushing back now in a flood. “The MIODs are also a form of experimentationâthey think they can use them in battle against other countries, to get inside people and take over entire armies that way. There were obviously worse things waiting for me. You saved me from some surgery today. You got there just in time.”
“I know.” I stare into his eyes. “So do you remember me now? Who I am to you?”
He looks back. I see a look of emptiness and sorrow. “I want to remember you. . . . I wish I did. But I don't. For some reason, things and events are easier to remember than people. It's like some kind of partial amnesia.”
I nod, trying to stay calm. I know that if I freak out, that will only make things worse. I remember what it was like when I surfaced from the isolation tank back on Island Alpha, and couldn't remember my situation for a few minutes. It was terrifying. I realize Liam probably feels scared too, but is hiding it.
I take his hand. I tell myself that it's just taking longer than I expected for him to recover from the drugs he was given. But inside, I feel rattled. Shaken up. I need his support and love.
What happens if his memory doesn't come back?
I'm suddenly overwhelmed by a horrible feeling. If his memory doesn't come back, will he still be in love with me? What if he likes someone else? If he can't remember everything that we shared together, then will he still care about me?
“I'm your girlfriend,” I tell him, my voice breaking.
“I guessed you probably were,” he says.
“I love you,” I continue. “We've been together for months. We met on the wheel. I rescued you when you got frozen in the specimen archiveâ” I break off. “Is any of this making sense to you?”
He gazes back at me. “Sort of. I have bits and pieces of memories. It feels like a dream that I've half forgotten.” He pats my hand. “I'm sure my memory will come back.”
“Guys, this is taking too long,” Gadya says. “Speed things up!”
I have a sudden idea. Before I can think about it, I move toward Liam.
Then I lean in and kiss him.
He is startled at first. Hesitant. He almost pulls back from me. But I press my lips firmly against his. I have to help him find his way back.
If nothing else will help him remember me and our feelings for each other, then maybe this will. I can't think of anything better to do.
We kiss for a moment and then our lips part. I lean back and look deep into his eyes.
And I see a flash of recognition.
“Alenna . . . ,” he says. “Yes, I remember somethingâ” He stops talking.
“Tell me.”
His eyes suddenly clear, like a veil has been lifted. “I remember you! Oh my god, of course.” He grabs me and we hug. I feel tears in my eyes. “How could I not?”
It feels like we've been reunited for a second time.
He lets go of me. “I'm so sorry! Do you forgive me? It's all coming back now . . . everything . . .” He looks overwhelmed.
“It's not your fault,” I tell him. I'm filled with a degree of relief
that makes me feel ecstatic. “I'm just glad you're back!”
He leans in and kisses me again. This time it's more passionate. It feels like Liam again, and not some stranger. I don't want the kiss to end.
“I shouldn't have worried about trying to protect you,” he says, holding me tightly. “In the end, you were the one who helped me when I needed it.”
“We help each other,” I say. “That's how it's always been.”
Gadya strolls over. She's been listening, but she hasn't said anything yet. “You remember me now, I hope?” she asks Liam. She looks at me. “Should I kiss him too?” I can tell that she's kidding. I smile.
“Of course I remember you,” Liam says to her. “How could I have forgotten you, Gadya? It seems crazy. The memories are all back. Well, most of them.”
“Good to hear it.”
Gadya hands me her knife. I realize she doesn't need it now that she has the gun. We can still hear the distant sounds of the battle.
Gadya inspects her gunshot wound. It has stopped bleeding. I glance down at mine.
Liam notices. “You're hurt. Both of you.”
“It's nothing,” Gadya and I say at almost exactly the same time.
Liam smiles. “You guys are hard-core.”
“You mentioned a surgery?” I ask him. “Do you know what it was for?”
He shakes his head. “No, but something bad. I helped lead a group of boys to try to escape a couple days ago. Then the guards took me, beat me up, and put me in that room. They hooked me up to the IV. After that everything becomes sort of blurry in my mind.” He pauses. “They're doing things to kids. Making some
kind of hybrid creatures by using drugs to mutate their DNA and turn them into monsters that will fight for the UNA.”
“We saw a mutant on a farm near where we found you. A boy that was, like, seven feet tall and deformed,” I tell him.
Gadya nods. “Genetic experiments.”
I realize that Liam doesn't know yet that Rika is dead. There will be time to tell him about that later. I don't want to overwhelm him yet, and Gadya isn't saying anything about it either. Rika's death is still hard for me to process. I don't want it to be true.
I hear faint noises. Liam and Gadya hear them too. We all stop moving around and talking.
Liam gestures to our left. “Someone's out there,” he whispers.
We draw closer together. Gadya swings the gun in the direction of the noise. I raise my knife.
A moment later I see a shadowy figure in the trees, moving closer. One of the guards must have followed us from the battlefield.
“Who's there?” I call out.
“Show yourself or get shot!” Gadya ads.
A second later a person steps out of the trees. He's carrying a gun, pointed right at us, and he has a feral look in his eyes. His face is swollen and bruised, but I recognize him right away.
Mikal.
“How did you find us?” I ask, startled.
“Friend of yours?” Gadya asks me warily.
“Yeah, do you know him?” Liam asks me, as Gadya keeps her gun aimed at Mikal.
“I tracked you . . . ,” he says to me. His voice sounds thick from the beating I gave his face.
“All this way?” I sound as surprised as I feel.
He grins. It's lopsided, and it makes him look demented. Many of his teeth are cracked and broken from my blows. “I told you I'd be seeing you again. . . . I know this land. . . . I grew up here. . . . I can track anyone and anything.”
“Mikal, you can't come with us,” I tell him warily.
“I don't want to come with you anymore,” he says, looking at me with tired, bloodshot eyes. “I just want to get revenge.”
He cocks his gun and takes a step forward. I don't know where he got the gun from, but I assume he either took it from his mother's farmhouse or found one along the way.
“Turn around and get out of here,” Gadya says, pointing the gun directly at his face, “or I will blow your brains out.”
“Go back home,” I tell him. “Back to your mom and your sisters.”
“I can't do that, Alenna,” he says. Even with his swollen lips I see a mocking smile. “I burned down the farmhouse and left my mom and sisters to cry in the ruins. I'm never going back there.”
He has gone insane. I see his finger tighten on the trigger. I prepare to throw my blade at his chest. I know that Gadya is ready to fire.
Suddenly, Mikal stumbles backward with a loud shriek as Liam leaps forward. I don't understand what's happened at first. Then I realize that Liam has thrown a fistful of dirt right into his face.
“My eyes!” Mikal screams. “I can't see!” He starts pulling the trigger of his gun and I flinch, expecting a barrage of bullets, but the gun doesn't fire. It's either empty, or it's jammed.
Liam keeps rushing forward and tackles Mikal. He climbs on top of his body. Liam punches him in the head as hard as he can. Gadya and I rush over. I grab Mikal's gun and yank it out of his hand. Gadya starts kicking him in the ribs.
There can be little mercy for Mikal. He would have shot all of us if he could. He is too unstable to trust.
Liam stands up. “He's out cold. I hit him hard enough to crack his skull. He'll be out for a few hours. Maybe longer.”