The Devil You Know (12 page)

“What are you looking at?” I asked, folding my arms across my chest.

His lips twitched in a hint of a smile, quickly banished. “What are you going to tell him?”

I hunkered down lower in the love seat. “I haven’t the faintest idea.”

“And your plan to keep him safe from Der Jäger is…?”

“See previous answer.” I closed my eyes, laying the back of my head against the back of the love seat. Why did everything always have to be so fucking complicated?

“You might want to work something out before he gets here.”

I opened my eyes and glared at him. “Thanks for the tip, Einstein.”

My snarkiness didn’t seem to bother him, which wasn’t much of a surprise. After all, I’d probably been snarky in the womb, and he’d known me all my life. He met my glare with a neutral expression.

“And have you considered the possibility that Der Jäger might have gotten to him already?”

“No!” I shouted, though the very vehemence of my denial proved what a liar I was. “I refuse to consider it.”

Apparently, Andy had some wax buildup in his ears, since he went right on talking.

“When he comes in, I’ll keep him contained,” he said, patting the Taser that lay beside him on the couch. “Then you check out his aura, make sure he doesn’t have company.”

“Who died and made you king?” I asked, then grimaced at my choice of clichés.

“You’re probably right, and Der Jäger probably hasn’t gotten to him yet. But ‘probably’ isn’t ‘absolutely.’ You know we have to make sure.”

The problem was, I
did
know. And it didn’t make a damn bit of difference whether I liked it or not.

As Andy and I waited for Brian to arrive, I pulled a single chair away from the dining room table, positioning it in the biggest open space I could find. I had to shove the coffee table and love seat to the side to make room. Then I dug into my supply of vanilla-scented candles, arranging them in a circle around the chair. When the security desk downstairs called, I told them to send Brian up, and I started lighting the candles, trying to pretend my hands weren’t shaking as I did so. I moved one candle out of alignment to give Brian room to enter the circle. Then, I waited.

Andy, his strength slowly beginning to return, propped himself against the dining room wall, giving himself a clear shot at the doorway. The Taser was armed and ready to go, and Andy’s face showed nothing but grim determination. I hoped he didn’t have an itchy trigger finger, but it was too late to reverse our roles now.

The ding of the elevator gave me advance warning of Brian’s arrival. I gave up trying to sort out the clamor of emotions that warred within me, steadying my nerves as best I could. I still had no idea what I was going to tell him.

I opened the door before he had a chance to knock, and the sight of him stole my breath.

In the looks department, Brian can’t compete with the perfection of Lugh or Adam, but he’s still damn good-looking, in a sort of all-American-boy way that seemed so wrong for someone like me. My heart fluttered in my chest at the sight of him, even though he wasn’t giving me the fabulous, warm smile that had melted away my cares so often.

He opened his mouth to say something, then caught sight of Andrew and the Taser. His whisky-brown eyes widened with shock and he gaped at me. Guilt gnawed at my guts, but I forced myself to meet his eyes.

“Step inside, please,” I said, moving back a bit and holding the door open for him.

He just stood there, staring at me. “What’s this all about?”

“Come in, and I’ll explain. I’m really sorry about this. Andy and I are just being paranoid.” When he still didn’t move, I gave him my most beseeching look. I was pretty sure that if he didn’t come in of his own free will, Andy was going to zap him, but if I could possibly avoid threatening him, I would.

Finally, Brian’s shoulders slumped. “This ought to be an interesting explanation,” he muttered.

Even though I didn’t really believe Der Jäger had gotten to him yet, I kept my distance from him as he crossed the threshold and I closed the door behind him. It was then that he saw the chair and the circle of candles.

“You think I’m
possessed
?” he cried, giving me a look that said I was out of my mind.

I shook my head. “No. But I’d hate to be wrong. Please just take a seat. I’ll take a quick look at your aura, and then we can talk.”

He scowled at me. Before my bad influence had rubbed off on him, he’d been one of the most even-tempered individuals I’d ever met. I hated the thought that being with me had changed that.

“I should have known when you called me that it would be something like this.” His face slightly flushed with his anger, he stomped over to the chair and plopped down on it, refusing to meet my eyes.

“I’m sorry,” I said again, but he didn’t look at me or acknowledge the apology.

Trying not to be hurt, because, after all, I’d be acting the same way in his shoes, I closed the circle. It wasn’t really necessary for the candles to be arranged in a circle, and often I dispensed with the formality, but I was so miserable that I fell back on the more traditional ritual.

I sat cross-legged on the floor, facing the man I loved while my brother held him at Taser-point. Letting myself drift into the trance state might turn out to be something of an issue when I was such an emotional wreck.

I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, drawing the calming scent of vanilla into my lungs. It was a scent my body and mind associated with the peaceful, dreamy sensation of the trance state, and some of my tension fled with that first deep breath. I could do this. And when I’d explained, Brian would understand.

Even as I thought that to myself, I remembered Lugh’s parting shot—
No, I would not expect you, of all people, to take anything on faith
. The memory almost dispelled the calm that had begun to settle, but after a quick spike of adrenaline, another breath of vanilla took me farther away from the physical world.

The trance descended on me like an altered state of consciousness. The real world fell away, and my mind opened to my otherworldly vision, the kind that did not rely on my eyes.

In the trance state, I can see nothing but living beings, the physical world around them nothing but a black, empty void. People show up as vaguely human-shaped patches of primary blue, their hue shaded by their emotions. Fear tends to tinge their auras with yellow, and though my focus was on Brian, I could see that Andy’s aura was almost green. I wondered if he was afraid because he thought Brian might be hosting Der Jäger, or if he was just in a perpetual state of fear after what Raphael had done to him.

I forced my attention away from my brother and examined Brian’s aura. There was no hint of demon-red in it, but it roiled with every shade of blue imaginable, his emotions raw and wild. I had a voyeur’s temptation to linger in the trance, staring at his aura and picking out the emotions, finding out exactly what he felt about me at this moment. But then, did I really want to know?

I opened my eyes, and the real world reappeared. “You can relax,” I told Andy. “His aura’s clean.”

Andy lowered the Taser, but I wouldn’t exactly say he relaxed. I started blowing out candles, and the acrid smell of smoke blended with the vanilla.

“May I get up?” Brian asked acidly, “or are you planning to handcuff me to the chair for interrogation now?”

Guilt stabbed through me for a moment, but I fought against it. I hadn’t done anything wrong. There would have been no other way to confirm that Der Jäger hadn’t possessed him.

I blew out the last candle and spoke without looking at him. “I’m not going to apologize again. I’ve got a rogue demon after me, and I’ve got reason to believe he might try to get to me through people I care about. I had to make sure he hadn’t gotten to you yet.”

I was on my knees, gathering up the candles. I heard Brian stand up. I swallowed the lump in my throat and looked up at him, the still-warm candles clutched to my chest. The steely look in his eyes told me he hadn’t forgiven me. I struggled to my feet.

“Please sit down,” I said. “We really do need to talk.”

His face closed and shuttered, he pulled the coffee table away from the couch so there was room for him to sit. It wasn’t hard to read from his body language that he didn’t want to hear what I had to say.

“I’ll take those,” Andy said, and I jumped a bit, not having noticed him approach. He reached for the candles, and I gratefully allowed him to take them from me. Then he mouthed “good luck” at me before he tactfully disappeared into the guest bedroom and closed the door.

I had a brief moment of worry, until I saw he’d left the Taser on the coffee table. Brian saw me looking at it, and before I could say anything, he grabbed it. At least he didn’t point it at me.

Once upon a time, I’d have sat next to him on the couch and had a good snuggle—which would have led to a passionate bout of lovemaking. Now, I felt like I was with a stranger, maybe even a hostile one, so I sat on the love seat instead, my hands folded in my lap.

“Do you know how to fire that?” I asked him, and his eyes widened in surprise. I guess he hadn’t been expecting the question. “If you don’t, then I’d be more comfortable if you gave it to me. Just in case my new friend manages to get in the building and breaks down the door.”

His mouth tightened into a grim line, but he put the Taser on the coffee table and slid it across to me. I was glad to have something to hold on to, even if my palm was clammy and my taped fingers made the grip awkward.

“So, what’s the story?” he asked, and his voice was now carefully neutral. It was his lawyer-voice, and I’d always hated it.

A part of me wanted to spill my guts, tell him everything, lean on him so I wouldn’t feel so alone anymore. And despite Andy, and Adam, and Lugh, I really was alone. I distrusted all three of them, to differing degrees and for different reasons. Brian had always been someone I trusted.

But I had done everything I could so far to keep the chaos of my life from dragging him down with me, and I wasn’t going to let my selfish desire for comfort ruin everything.

“There’s not a whole lot to tell,” I lied. “I ran afoul of a rogue demon, and he’s made it clear he’s planning to come after me. I found out tonight that the host I met him in had been abandoned in an alley, and I realized his best chance of getting close to me was through someone I know. Do you have any vacation time coming to you? Is there any chance you could get out of town for a week or two?”

Brian laughed, but it was a bitter sound. “You don’t learn, do you? I’m not the type to run and hide.”

Heat flushed my face, and I had to pull back the reins on my temper. “I understand that. I really do. But this guy’s a
demon
. And we have no idea what body he’s in. There’s no way you can protect yourself from that.”

“Why is this demon after you?”

It was the question I’d been dreading, the question I had no good answer for. I did the best I could, though I’m a lousy liar. “I tried to exorcize him. I failed, and he got away. Now it’s payback time.”

Brian rolled his eyes. “That’s bullshit. If a rogue demon had escaped confinement, it would be all over the news. I haven’t heard a peep.”

I did my best to improvise, but I knew my answer came too slowly, showing that I had to think a minute. “The police are trying to keep it quiet to prevent a panic.”

He stood up, shaking his head. “Either tell me the truth, or I walk. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m a grown, capable man. I don’t need you to protect me.”

I knew it was a stupid thing to do, but I couldn’t help the snort of laughter. I tried to turn it into a cough, but failed. Brian glared at me, and I made a calming gesture with my hand.

“Sorry, but I’m an exorcist, and the bad guy’s a demon. There’s no one more qualified to protect you in this case than I am.”

“Bye, Morgan,” he said, spinning on his heel and striding for the door.

I surged to my feet, the Taser clutched in my hand. “Brian, please! We need to talk about this, come up with a plan, even if you’re not willing to get out of town.”

He held up his hand in a wave, not turning to look at me. Moving almost on autopilot, I armed the Taser and pointed it at his back.

“Brian, stop!” I said in my most commanding voice. When he ignored me and reached for the doorknob, I yelled even louder. “Stop, or I’ll shoot!”

That gave him pause, and he glanced over his shoulder. When he saw the Taser, the blood drained from his face.

I felt a tear drip from the corner of my eye and crawl down my cheek. Words couldn’t express how much I hated this. But how could I let him just walk away? He had absolutely no way to defend himself against a rogue demon. I doubted he could fire a Taser, even if he had one. I sniffled, but didn’t relent.

“I’m sorry if I’m offending your macho, he-man sensibilities,” I said with far more steel in my voice than I actually felt, “but if I have to save you in spite of yourself, I’ll do it.”

He blinked, hand still on the doorknob. “You dumped me, Morgan. I’m no longer your responsibility. Not that I ever was. If you’re going to shoot, go ahead and do it.”

He turned his back to me once more, turning the doorknob. My finger tightened on the trigger, and I braced my shaking hand as best I could with my other hand. The door swung open, and I willed myself to pull the trigger. Brian stepped over the threshold, and still I stood frozen in place, statue-still except for the tremors that ripped through me.

The door started to close behind him. It was my last chance.
Don’t be such a baby,
I urged myself.
It’s for his own good, and it doesn’t matter if he hates you for it. Hell, that might even be a
good
thing.

After what felt like about three years, I finally found the will to pull the trigger. Just in time for the Taser probes to thunk harmlessly into the closed door.