Read The Diary of Ellen Rimbauer: My Life at Rose Red Online
Authors: Ellen Rimbauer
Tags: #General, #Fiction
wing is to extend beyond the Pool House and Bowling Alley so as
to not be seen from the approach, to not damage the continuity
of the look of the grand house. It will add some six thousand
square feet on two ?oors, twelve thousand square feet in all. A
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pittance of what is to come! We are adding three visitor suites, a
four-room home for Sukeena, complete with her own kitchen, a
Bird Room, a Map Room and more schooling facilities for the
children, as well as a Projection Room so that we might view
motion pictures in the comfort of our home. There is to be
another pool—a hot pool this time, with salts from Europe, for
cleansing of the spirit and treatment of arthritis, from which I
suffer since the birth of our second child. This pool will be made
available to my women friends—women only!—for those who wish
to purge the ills of city living. John has no doubt arranged for
another of his viewing closets to overlook this women’s pool, and
though loath to accept it, I see no way to stop its construction,
given that the ?nal say with the foreman is John’s and John’s
alone. (This condition I could not negotiate with my husband.) I
know such a room will be built and that I shall never ?nd its
entrance. I can imagine my husband enclosed there, my dear
friends without garments (for the salt will harm the fabric), seen
as God will have them. My husband leering. And him not knowing
that I know. (If possible, I may try to arrange an act or two to
stun his curiosity! I am not without a sense of prank when it
comes to John.) I will not blame him for these transgressions. I
have brought it upon myself by denying him any access to my
chambers. Those days are over. With motherhood prevented by
April’s unfortunate birth, I see no reason for union with this
horrible man. He can ?nd his pleasure elsewhere. (And he does,
I’m sure!) I take my pleasure from motherhood. It suf?ces for
me. It ?lls me as a man never could. As a man never will again.
The new wing shall rise from this hole in the ground now
being dug. It shall rise and give me extended life, as promised by
Rose Red herself. I swear at times I hear her. Not just the creaking
of an old house but the voice that inhabits it. A woman’s
voice, low and foreboding. A voice I heard utter from my own
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mouth. A voice that perhaps my little April hears too as she sits
playing with her model.
As to that, take note, Dear Diary. With these complaints of my
daughter’s continuing meditation on the brilliant model of Rose
Red, I elected to take tea on the upper Loggia. I instructed for
April to join me, and that her model be placed there as well, so
that I might see her playing with it, might come to understand the
nature of these complaints from the governess.
Daughter and mother did spend a lovely afternoon basking in
the fall sunlight, warm and pleasant on the skin. I had tea and
scones, and April ate a scone or two herself, a rare treat for me
since it is dif?cult to get April to eat anything at all. She played
with the large working model of the home while her mother
angled her wicker chair to face west, where the new wing’s excavation
was partly to be seen. I must have spent the hour there, April
just behind me and to my right, explaining to my child the construction
yet to come, how the new wing would rise from where
once only lawn existed, would rise to ful?ll our dreams and to
hold our love, one to the other.
Finally, the sun cooling and my fever beginning to rise again
as it does so many late afternoons, I turned to instruct my little
wonder with her withered arm that it was time to move inside for
the day. I turned to offer my hand to her, to help her stand. I
turned, my voice catching in my throat.
There on the red Italian tile of the Loggia’s ?oor, I looked
down upon the architect’s model that April had so long ago
claimed as her dollhouse. I reached out for my daughter’s one
good hand. And I gasped at what I saw beneath my child’s pointed
?nger, a devilish grin owning her face.
The working model of Rose Red had a new addition, complete
and perfect, every window, every chimney in its place. The new
wing, exactly as I imagined it in my mind.
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That wing had not been there on that model when our tea
began. Under my daughter’s care, that model had grown the wing
all of its own. The model of Rose Red is alive, and the grand
house along with it.
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12 october 1914—rose red
It is with heavy heart that I report the latest tragedy. As wife and
mother of his children, I appreciate John Rimbauer’s business
acumen, the wealth he has accumulated, and I avoid, as much as
possible, contradicting him in this regard or offering unsolicited
advice; this, despite the fact that I do not hold the man himself in
much regard. Today, however, I am desperate with dread over his
treatment of his former partner, Douglas Posey, a man whom
others continue to view as his partner despite secret negotiations
that have reduced Douglas to an employee (though a rich one at
that!), for I fear my husband’s actions were motivated by disapproval
of Douglas’s private choices rather than the man’s business
wherewithal. Oh, if that’s not the pot calling the kettle black!
While John lifts the skirts of his dockside whores he condemns
Douglas for taking up with his pale young men.
This morning Douglas appeared at the front door of Rose Red
and was announced by his footman there. A butler hurried
through the house searching out John and found him in the vast
library and study off his chambers, where my husband puts in
much time. John took his time responding, ?nally descending
the Grand Stair in a slow procession that I am certain was
intended both to make Douglas wait as well as to indicate John’s
regal attitude as concerns his former partner.
I had made a rare visit to the Kitchen, just beyond the Grand
Stair, to sample a soup to be served at a ladies’ luncheon (I am
hosting the board of the children’s hospital lunch) and so was in a
position to overhear the Lord and Master of Rose Red as he
greeted our guest.
“What is it, Posey?” John Rimbauer called out, still sixty feet
down the Entry Hall. Lined with his African game trophies, the
Entry Hall is a very masculine, very ominous place, all those glass
eyes bearing down on one. The dead heads of former predators.
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Dead souls. I hate the place at night—being watched like that.
Teeth glaring. The architect’s working model of Rose Red has a
home on a corner table by the front door and is only moved at
April’s request, shuttled around the house by butlers each day for
her entertainment. We keep a bouquet (nine dozen fresh ?owers)
on a sideboard in an Egyptian urn halfway down the Entry Hall, a
new bouquet every three days, and the ?owers throw color into
the hall where much is needed. I bought that urn the same day the
bandits tried to rob us in the market, the same day Sukeena
reduced them to cries of abdominal pain as we walked past to our
safety. That urn serves as a reminder to me that to pass by it is to
acknowledge such powers as Sukeena possesses. Nothing is as it
seems. The African maid is a witch doctor. The house is alive.
The lady of the house is half crazy—or more than half, depending
on the day.
My husband stops halfway down that long hall, his eyes as dead
as those of the beasts overhead. “Servants’ entrance is in the
back.”
“I’ve made some mistakes, John,” a quivering voice acknowledged.
“I would like to talk to you about coming back on.”
“Not possible. I’ve a company to run. I’m busy.”
“You cheated me!”
“Nonsense!”
“You convinced me to sell my stock. And now, in just six
months—”
“You threatened to sell your stock, Douglas. Is your memory
so poor? I offered to buy it from you—above market value, you
may recall—in order to keep that transaction, those shares, from
?ooding the market and setting off a selling spree. You were only
too happy to sell. That our shares have doubled in six months is
tribute to a good product and ?rm management—management of
which, as of today, you are no longer a part. This, because of
your own despicable actions and promises made that were bro-
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ken. End of discussion. Walter!?” John summoned our doorman,
who appeared miraculously through the doors of the Grand
Ballroom. “Show our guest out.”
Walter obediently opened the door. It is cold this October.
Colder than I remember.
Douglas did not move. “I’ve gambled some in the market,
John. I could use some help.”
“Our guest will be leaving.”
“Please.”
“Now!” John said sharply.
“Go to hell,” Douglas Posey mumbled, not really meaning it,
I fear.
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thanksgiving day, 1914—rose red
Young Adam is ?ve years old, April three, and for the ?rst year
both children understood the signi?cance of Thanksgiving. John
was delightful with the children, telling the story of the Pilgrims
and the ?rst Thanksgiving. The sun blessed us with a fall day to
remember. It had been cold of late, but not today.
The servants had their own gathering in the Carriage House—
nearly ?fty for Thanksgiving dinner. John provided them seven
fresh turkeys and bushels of yams, carrots and peas. Cases of
wine. The day was one of much celebration and served to remind
me how peaceful a place this can be when in high spirits. I think
that John’s break with Douglas Posey has proved to be a wise
move. He has been much calmer these past several weeks, less
given to unexpected outbursts of temper. He even played with
Adam—something unheard of these past several months. (He has
arranged for the construction of a giant toy train to occupy an
entire room in the children’s wing. Complete with mountains,
forests, bridges and stations, it is to be an exact replica of the
Seattle area and to utilize some nine hundred feet of toy railroad
track, a quarter ton of modeling clay, a dozen gallons of paint
and six thousand toothpicks—in one bridge alone. Adam is to
have the Christmas of his life!)
Oh, Dear Diary, thank you for the good times that outweigh
the troubled. Thank you for Sukeena, for the children, for our
good fortune. Bless those who have gone missing when inside
these walls, and give them rest.
We have had no grave tragedy within this house for some time
now. I hope and pray it shall stay this way. Perhaps Madame
Stravinski saved us. Construction continues unabated. This
house is growing daily.
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20 february 1915—rose red
This family continues to pay for the sins of its father. I fear my
children may never recover from this latest incident, and I am
loath to prevent it, to stop it now for it has already happened.
The events of this story were not personally witnessed. Instead,
they are put here in ink through my own interpretation of
Sukeena’s having spoken in con?dence with young Adam. (He
would only speak to Sukeena, and no one else.)
This afternoon, Douglas Posey came to visit. He did not
announce himself at the front door, was not greeted by one of the
doormen. In fact, if the events of this day are to be explained—
sawdust was found on his shoes—it would appear that Douglas
entered the house via the new construction to the west. His
motorcar was found parked alongside the main road, pulled off
into the trees. From there, he hiked the hill and crested to the
west of the new construction, approaching Rose Red from a side
where he might go unnoticed, as alas, he must have so done. His
next accomplishment baf?es me, as mother to our children, for
we employ no fewer than two governesses, Miss Crenshaw and
Miss Dunn, and three other dedicated nannies, including April’s
wet nurse, Miss Helms, whom we held over to care for the children
when her primary purpose had been served. The sole
responsibility of all these women is to watch over the children.
Nonetheless, for reasons that are not immediately explained, the
children went unattended on this day, at the particular hour that
I now relate here to your pages.
Somehow Douglas managed to make his way from the new
construction through the Pool House and the Bowling Alley to
the south stairs. If one goes down these stone stairs, one is led to
the Game Room, where John butchers and hangs his deer and elk
after a hunt. Up these same stairs leads one to the West Wing and
our chambers—John with ?ve rooms including his private study,
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and me with seven, including my dressing and ?tting rooms. It
was a cunning move on the part of Douglas Posey, for excepting
the chambermaids who clean and service the linens, and the butlers
who attend our ?replaces and chimneys, these rooms and
hallways go unoccupied—except when I am in?rmed, of course,
more often than not these days, but as it happens, not on this day